darth vadering

Anakin's Pendulum of Self-Worth

Anakin was born into slavery where he was quickly taught that life got better or worse based upon how much people thought you were worth. He claimed that he “wouldn’t have lasted so long if [he] wasn’t so good at fixing things.” He takes pride in this, because while he hates being a slave, at least he knows he’s valuable and safer as a result. He works hard and is talented. He knows it and he uses this knowledge as a weapon against the cruelties of life…including Sebulba.

As comfortable as Anakin is in that knowledge, he makes sure that everyone knows it. It needs to be known that he has worth. Thus, when Watto says that he “smashed up my pod in the last race,” Anakin is quick to point out that it wasn’t his fault and look what a good job I did. When Watto praises him, he calms down. He needed to hear that because he didn’t want Qui-Gon to lose interest in him because he isn’t useful anymore. He needs people to like him. When, you understand that this concept of economics, for lack of a better term, is what drives Anakin’s behavior, a lot of things make sense.

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Thinking about my deep cover au where Anakin, Padme, Obi-wan, and Ahsoka are gearing up to be the Four Horsemen of Palpatine’s own private apocalypse.

(Which is why I’m calling it Four Horsemen au in my head, btw. I don’t want it to get confused with @fialleril ‘s absolutely incredible Double Agent Vader stories)

Just a list of random extra things to go in it, most of them about Padme but some about the others:

Vader and Bail, despite being allies, are very stiff and uncomfortable around each other for a long time. (Vader is far more comfortable with Breha at first). But they end up bonding over being overprotective of Leia and being exasperated over some risk Obi-wan took. (”He’d better not teach that kind of behavior to Luke,” Bail asserts grimly. “Oh no, we’re in trouble as it is with my risk-taking and Padme’s being potentially genetic. Add Kenobi and Luke will have personally caused six cataclysms by his tenth birthday.” Vader agrees)

(Vader is afraid that Leia will hate him for most of her childhood, and he’s also afraid he’s endangering his kids every time he contacts them or interacts with them. Hence him misinterpreting about half of Leia’s cries when she was a baby as “I scared her” and usually ending with him or Breha yelling “Bail help!”
He’s a lot more confident with little Luke, who gets to call him twice a week and is convinced until he’s five that all dads are bald because his dad doesn’t have any hair)

Padme. 
Padme is a master of disguise.
I mentioned this in the other post, but now I’m adding a little more detail to her exploits.

As such, she gets to see her family much more than anyone else in the group. For Ahsoka’s twenty-second birthday, Padme disguises herself as a wandering Zeltron bard and helps her liberate an entire city, just the two of them. Toppling regimes tends to be what they do for Ahsoka’s birthday now. It’s rarely intentional. It just happens. And then they go out for drinks with General Syndulla, usually.

When she’s thirty-two, she invents a character named Joana Rys, a hard-nosed ISB harpy and the terror of Imperial interns everywhere. She uses this disguise as an excuse to visit her husband, who thinks the whole thing is hilarious and usually ends up creating a few “problems” for “Agent Rys” to discover and report.

There are entire divisions of the Empire that live in constant fear of up to three of Padme’s “characters” at any given time. Especially the one that has no name, just leaves the mark of angel wings burned into walls.

Luke had to learn to sense people’s identities early because his mother looked different almost every time he saw her. He also had to learn to keep secrets early because Beru had to explain to him “sometimes your Mommy needs you to pretend she’s not there, okay? Like hide-and-seek”.
Luke thinks this is totally normal until he’s ten.

About half of Anakin’s calls to Obi-wan end with the latter yelling “Have to go! Luke’s on the roof!” or “Luke’s trying to fly a speeder HE’S SEVEN” or “OWEN THAT’S NOT SAFE WHAT KIND OF EXAMPLE ARE YOU SETTING FOR LUKE” (Owen was balanced on a box with wheels. That’s it. That’s all he was doing)

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“We are number one sung by Darth Vader”

@markhamillz

star wars films rated by anakin being Extra™
  • The Phantom Menace: tries to flirt with the queen of Naboo. tells the Jedi Council he is "cold" when asked how he feels. 7/10 bc he is smol and good and the jedi are mean to him
  • Attack of The Clones: hates sand. "just being around her is...intoxicating." cries a lot. "I'm haunted by that kiss...that you should *never* have given me" anakin pls. 37/10 for pining Anakin.
  • The Clone Wars: now has an Edgy™ scar. causes many explosions and bad jokes. most problems he runs into are because he's v bad at hiding his marriage, fuckin dork. 9/10
  • Revenge of the Sith: where do i even begin. anakin NO 100/10
  • Star Wars Rebels: stands on top of a TIE fighter and flies it with the Force just so his cape can flap in a Cool™ way. 78/10
  • Rogue One: uses the Force to make his cloak flap, makes choking puns to scare Krennic. turns lights off of chest panel just to scare Rebels. literally has his fortress in the same place he fought (and lost) to Obi-Wan. a solid 59/10.
  • A New Hope: chokes people who insult the force. says "the circle is complete" & "when i left you, i was but the learner. now i am the Master!!". 12/10.
  • The Empire Strikes Back: Literally sits and waits at a dinner table so that he can surprise Han & Leia when Lando invites them to dinner??? also cuts off his own sons hand before revealing he is his father. unbeatable extra™-ness, 126/10
  • Return of the Jedi: chooses to redeem himself at the very last minute for the ultimate Dramatic Twist. burns on a pyre of flames. a good 30/10
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It’s Star Wars celebration this weekend! Posting these alternative movie posters all at once. 

All Prints available:

A New Hope

The Empire Strikes Back

Return of the Jedi

The Force Awakens

Rogue One

The Last Jedi