Summary: AU. Reader left behind a hometown full of misery to make a new home in Brooklyn. A death in the family forces her to briefly return to the place that has haunted her dreams and memories for three years. Will she finally be able to move on, or will a figure from the past change everything?
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Word Count: 2,837
angst, language, more angst, mention of alcoholism, mention of death, mention of funeral, mentions of neglect, mentions of estranged family members, heartache, sadness, mentions of sad childhood
A/N: This is the first part of my submission for the talented and wonderful @tatortot2701 ‘s AU writing challenge. (Tay, please disregard until it’s completed!) Y'all wanted angst, well…I took a fluffy prompt and darkened it. I tried not to but this story wouldn’t leave me alone. I’m not sure how many parts it will have.
My prompt was 28 .“____ is not a real word.” “Yes it is!”
(I am sad and write of sad things. Everyone will be all right in the end, I’m sure, but, Harris, you can’t run from your past forever.)
“Let’s eat peanut butter cups for dinner.”
Harris shifted the bag of groceries in his arms. “Was that your plan all along?”
Darcy nodded. “Yes.”
“Then why did we go grocery shopping?”
“I was luring you into a false sense of security, nutritionally speaking.” She did a little spin, enjoying the way her skirt flared around her knees. The bags in her hands bumped against her legs as she stopped, facing him. “It was my devious plan.”
He grinned at her, his cheeks pink from the spring breeze. “With chicken breasts and frozen vegetables?”
“You didn’t suspect a thing,” Darcy pointed out. She threw her hands in the air. Harris ducked under her bags without missing a step. “My plan was a success!”
“We’re not eating peanut butter cups for dinner,” Harris said. But he was smiling when he said it.
“Maybe you’re not, but you’re not the boss of me, soooooooo…” She tipped her head in his direction. “Make me a better offer.”
“I don’t know,” he mused. “I mean, we could try eating real food and not spending the rest of the night curled up in the fetal position, praying for death as the sugar rush wears off.”
He had a pronounced cowlick right now. It was adorable. Darcy shifted both of her bags to one hand and reached out with the other. “You make it sound like a bad plan.”
“Mr. Barnes is here. Again…” Her mother sniffed as she glanced down at the front walk from her perch at the upstairs window. “Honestly, Darcy…can’t you put him off nicely?”
Darcy shrugged with indifference. “Has it ever occurred to you, Mama…that perhaps I didn’t want to put him off?”
“True, he’s an officer, but I’ve asked as to his family, dear daughter, and they come from trade. You can’t expect to procure a marriage proposal from a decent suitor if you keep such wretched company. And he’s not even very pleasant, you know. There are a dozen other officers in the regiment more worthy of you. He’s from trade, he’s gruff and unpleasant…and that arm…”
Darcy sighed and rose, putting her needlepoint to the side. Her mother grabbed the hoop almost immediately, scrutinizing her work as she glided from the room to go meet her company. “I care not about his family, nor their money. I have more than enough of both as it is. I care not that he is ‘gruff and unpleasant’, as you put it, Mama…even though shyness often mimics unpleasantness to the undiscerning eye. Furthermore, I care not about his arm. He cares not, so why should it bother me?”
Her mother was silent for a full ten seconds. The longest in her entire life, no doubt. “This is full knots, Darcy…” Her mother reached for the scissors. “You’re going to have to redo it all again…I don’t know what I did to deserve such a daughter…keeps company with sons of tradesmen. Needlework full of knots…He doesn’t even leave a card, your Mr. Barnes!”
Darcy rolled her eyes and left the room. She found James waiting for her in the parlor, his hands behind his back as he inspected the painting hanging on the wall.
“Mr. Barnes….” She dipped into a curtsey.
“Miss Lewis…” he bowed briefly. “I briefly entertained a game of cards, but since arriving…” He glanced up towards the staircase. The sound of her mother’s complaining could be heard as it carried down from the sewing room. “I wondered if you would fancy a walk in the garden instead?”
Darcy smiled. “I would like that very much, sir. It’s a lovely day.”
“Good Morning America!” Darcy said enthusiastically. “How’s the view from your part of the world?”
“It would be much better if you were here, Darce.” He replied honestly. “And, I just got up.”
“You’re slacking off, Handsome.” Darcy teased him. “It’s 8a.m. in New York. What happened to your ‘ass crack of dawn’ morning run?”
“Can’t sleep good without you, Sweetheart.” A hint of loneliness in his voice. “Been far away for far too long.” Darcy frowned. She knew that Steve hated losing time with people he loved. One of the side effects of his seventy years ice nap.
“I love it when you use song lyrics, to show how much you care about me” Darcy said, trying to make him smile. “Much better than any mixed tape.”
“That wasn’t intentional, it’s how I feel. But, I’m surviving without you.” Taking a bite of his corn flakes before continuing. “Not that I want to. Natasha kicks my ass when I start to mope. I guess I have you to thank for that.”
“Yes, you do.” Darcy explained. “No one likes seeing a sad Steve Rogers. It’s the equivalent of someone taking all cat videos off the Internet. It’s something that you don’t want to happen.”
“I must sound lonely, needy and desperate for you.” Steve replied. “It’s official, I’m in love. I’m blaming you.”
“Damn straight you’re mine.” Smiling and sounding very proud of herself. “And, you’re not needy or desperate.” You just miss your girl, and it’s nice to be loved and missed.”
“I’ve been away for a month, and the separation has been hard on me too. But, it proves we’re not clingy or joined at the hip.”
“At least the time difference isn’t that huge. London is four hours ahead of New York City. You could alway steal the Quinjet, and come visit me.”
“Always an option.” Steve said regretfully. “Unfortunately, I have to be a responsible leader. Putting my wants and needs aside, no matter how much I don’t like or want to.“
“Let’s blame Jane for our misery.” She continued. “How dare she be the world’s only expert on the Convergence. She’s finally getting the scientific acknowledgement she deserves, and a Nobel Peace Prize.“
“All the fame is keeping me away from my cuddly human space heater. At least, we both have our comfort foods.” Purposely slurping her coffee to prove her point.
“How’s your corn flakes, and what you call ‘real’ milk in the glass bottle?” She asked, and Steve knew what she was going to say next. “Do you know the real reason corn flakes were invented?”
“Some crazy doctor thought it was a way to stop people from masturbating. An anti-sex food.” It really was one of the most ridiculous, but true things that he had read about. “Internet so helpful.”
“And, how’s that working for you?” Darcy laughed. “You eat that cereal like it’s religion. Is it curing that craving?”
“Not even close.” He replied, his voice a little rougher. “You’re the only taste I crave.”
“Damn it, Steve! Now I need to have room service bring me a few boxes of corn flakes…you know for Science.”
“Save the science experiment for when you come home.” He laughed. “I’ll demand our money back if it doesn’t work.”
“Very funny.” Darcy said. “I already told Jane that when we get back, I’m taking a few days off to work on my science experiment.”
“Like Jane would have any say in the matter.” He replied. “I’ll probably go all caveman on you. Throw you over my shoulder, and carry you back to our apartment.”
“As long as it doesn’t end there.” She demanded. “I expect a lot of sex and cuddling when I come home. Phone sex, sexting you while you’re in a meeting and video chats don’t compare to the real thing.”
“I don’t sleep well without you either. She finished, stifling a yawn. “I need to feel you wrapped around me. Guess that means I’m in love. It’s all your fault.”
“Damn right it is.” He replied, and Darcy could picture the smile on his face. “I love you, now get some sleep.”
“Love you too, Steve.” She replied. “I’ll hang up, and let you have some quality time with your anti-sex food.”
Steve hung up the phone, and ate another spoonful. Whoever believed that cereal was a cure for masturbation, obviously didn’t have someone like Darcy Lewis in their lives.
(Yes, it’s crazy but true. In 1894, two brothers, Dr John Harvey Kellogg and Will Keith “WK” Kellogg, were running a sanitarium and health spa in the town of Battle Creek, Michigan. Corn flakes were originally invented as a way to stop people from masturbating. )
- lizzie roasting darcy everytime they meet
- THE HAND TOUCH
- the whole room ceasing to exist when they dance
- “i love you… most ardently.”
- the whole rain scene and darcy’s EYES and how bad they wanna kiss omdmfmf
- the letter
- “i’m very fond of walking.”
“yes! yes, i know.”
-“my brother has told me so mUCH ABOUT YOU.”
- the one time darcy smiles and it’s sunshine
- when elizabeth is crying bc her sister ran off with a creep and darcy doesnt know what to do and u can tell he want to comfort her so bad tf
- darcy pining and being so awkward and not knowing what to do with his hands ever
- “you must know, SURELY YOU MUST KNOW, it was all for you.”
- YOUR HANDS ARE COLD
- everything else
Jane was out of town when all the Avengers trudged in looking the least heroic Darcy had ever seen them. Without even speaking Clint stomps threw the common room where Darcy is lounging watching DogCops. Natasha follows silently but heading the same path her friend had taken. Steve came threw next giving her a grim nod and heading for the elevator and likely the gym. Tony and Bruce had settled at the counter and Tony is already pouring shots in between sipping from the bottle. Normally Bruce would complain but he makes no comment and knocks back his first one before staring morosely into the second. Bucky flings himself down on the armchair and Sam takes the other end of the couch both oddly quite.
“I’m glad you’re home” Darcy offers softly. Sam doesn’t acknowledge other than his eyes glazing over looking exhausted. Bucky grunts and scratches absently at his stomach. Whatever happened must have been really rough for Bucky to not even wink at her. Before Darcy can decide on her next course of action the last Avenger comes in from the cold.
“I would eat and then meet you on the train grounds, Lightening Sister.” Thor’s voice usually fills a room. Even in his softest tones his words swell to seem fuller somehow than any non Asgardian’s. Darcy nods and is standing before she realizes. “The Armour you wear for Lady Natasha will suffice” and then he’s rooting around in the fridge, back to the others. Darcy looks around but Only Bucky is even paying attention and he just shrugs.
“Have fun Doll”
“Where did you get that?” Darcy exclaims in awe when she arrives in the gym. She must have been wrong about Steve because Thor is sitting alone beside a number of impressive looking mid evil weaponry. Thor looks up from the short sword he’s holding.
“Anthony and I fashioned them when you mentioned your interest in taking up arms” He smiled lightly flipping the sword causally. “It was an good bonding experience to bend metal with the Man of Iron”
Darcy steps closer and can tell the Tony works from the Thor works. Tony’s look impeccably sharp and deadly. All raw edges and gleaming in the sunlight pouring in threw the windows. Thor’s however, they look just as deadly but the handles are more interesting. One is a curving a leaves and stars and it reminds her of Jane. There’s a huge double headed halberd that has a wing on each blade and is connected to a twisting center pole that ends in a hawk like bird on the end. There are several smaller knives and Darcy could spend all day looking at the things he’d made with his hand.
“Which of these calls to you?” Thor asks gently breaking up her look at all the sweet stuff trance. Darcy’s a little overwhelmed. She had jokingly told him she’d like to be a bad ass wielding claymore warrior like Lady Sif from the Norse stories but it seemed a tall order for her to not only hold one but successfully swing one as she was 5f3 to Sif’s 6f4. Darcy’s lamenting the lack of Claymore and her stature when she sees it.
It’s undoubtedly one of Thor’s because the hilt is engraved with lightning and runes. If she didn’t know any better she’d call it a long sword but it’s thicker than anything she knows the words for. When her fingers close around the hilt she surprised at how light it is. The weight it perfect and she closes both hands around the grip admiring the center ridge and shininess. Thor chuckles lowly.
“I have told you that this is a highly personal request yes?” Thor speaks again and Darcy manages to stop staring at her new found friend. She nods. “The first weapons training Asguardian children have is with their father or mother, whichever is more skilled. Most of the time parents will craft the weapon together for their young and then the parent and child go on a trip together to learn. It is different with each house and each child. It is a very special thing Darcy” He says. Darcy nods again almost afraid Thor will change his mind. He waits however needing to hear her speak.
“Did you make this for me?” Darcy gestures to the weapon in her hand. He gives her a tight smile that reminds her of all the years he has lived. He nods. “It’s amazing, buddy, I love it. If you don’t want to do this it’s okay I can learn on my own and well spar or something” He chuckles at her babbling. He holds up a hand before she can talk herself out of this. The sun is beginning to set and the way it slams into their tower windows has her sweating slightly.
“I did not know what to make of your request at first. But Anthony tells me you have no father or mother. I have long considered you my family, Darcy and I can not hope to replace that which you have lost but I should like to be your family as much as I know how.” His lower lips trembles just enough that Darcy’s heart instantly breaks. Whatever happened today has him in knots.
“Yes.” Her voice is thick too seeing his emotions. “Yea of course.” Thor shakes his head as if to clear whatever was bothering him, he wants to push it off a little longer. “So does she have a name?” Darcy smiles holding her weapon again and striking a pose.
“Not yet, little one, We’ll name her together when we finish.”
They practice until the sweat rolling down Darcy’s body has nothing to do with the Sun that has long disappeared. Thor shows her the correct way to hold position her top hand so the cross guard doesn’t chafe her knuckles so badly. He demonstrates a thrust and Darcy copies. He continues it shoulder muscles rippling with each ferocious jab and they repeat it until Darcy finally lets loose and completes the move with all her energy. Thor beams and they move onto perrys.
Eventually Thor senses her tiring and calls it quits, passing her a bottle of water. Darcy is exhausted and aching in weird places her workouts with Nat don’t touch. It was incredibly difficult and she feels another flare of respect for Sif and her Claymore.
“You would have made a formidable opponent had you learned as a child” Thor commends. “and will be sooner than I anticipate, no doubt” He winks with a secret smile. Darcy grins back. It was weird to say they bonded thru arms training but she really did feel closer to her giant bestie.
“Did you like use Mjolnir to make this? Because I feel like that makes me pretty worthy be default. I fully expect a coronation on my first visit” She giggles. Thor barks out a laugh.
“Why wait?” He grabs his cape from where he’d tossed in on the bench and throws it around Darcy’s shoulders. The cape is heavier than she would have guessed and of course is a foot too long for her. It pools around her on the ground but Darcy stands a little straighter beaming up at him. “By the power granted me by this might hammer, I proclaim you, Lady Darcy, Princess of Asgard.” He grabs her shoulders and presses a kiss to her forehead. His lips linger and Darcy feels his fierce love and his emotional day surrounding her. She wraps as much of her arms around him as she can, keeping him in close. It seems so wrong that such a big guy could tremble in her arms, like a child, but his arms shake with tremors that the work out had pushed off.
“It’s okay” She says softly. Hot wet tears splash on the top of her head and forehead. “It’s gonna be okay Thor, There’s nothing we can’t fix. It’ll be okay” She mutters gentle reassurances until he’s calmed and finally he pulls back with a watery snotty smile. It was mildly comforting to Darcy that even Thor was an ugly crier.
“You are surely a blessing I have not earned little one.” He says. “Come let us name your blade” He smiles for real and grabs the hilt and presses it back into Darcy’s hands. She grips it expectantly waiting for instruction. Thor beams at the picture she makes, short, flushed, eager and in under armor gear and his billowing red cape.
“So how bout Alfred?” She says awkwardly rocking on the balls of her feet. Thor laughs again and clasps his hands on the grip over hers.
“Do your best to relax.” Thor says and that’s all the warning she has before their hands begin to glow a bright white color and heat flares up her am like she’s touched a car that’s been the hot sun. It’s almost too much to bare when Thor finally releases her and the white light fades to blue and the blue light rescinds into the weapon. “Loki is not the only son to study with Mother” He smiles.
Darcy spreads her fingers curiously to find two things. The first is that the dull silver lightning engraved on the grip is now an otherworldly blue and a name has been carved into the blade just above the rain guard, Thor peers at it curiously before beaming at her.
“Eldr Hjarta ?” Darcy stumbles threw the unfamiliar words. “Fire something right?” She looks up into Thor’s eyes, thumb still rubbing the words. The lightning matches his eyes, she thinks.
“Fire heart” He agrees. “It is a good name. My first one was called, Byrstr, or thirsty”
Darcy laughs and the worry she held about Thor softens a little. He’s going to be okay.
“Come let us spread the news.” He passes her the scabbard and belt. Thor is packing away the other weapons while she fastens the belt and blade to her side.
“You’ll talk to Jane about whatever happened? and maybe Sam?” She asks. Thor hums noncommittally. “Seriously Thor if you can’t tell those two who can you tell?”
“You are very wise, sister.” He huffs. “Very well, let us dwell on it no longer. Instead I should like to brag to Anthony that you chose a blade of my fashioning over his.” His smirk is playful and Darcy can’t help but giggle.
They enter the common room and Darcy’s so excited to show off her present she doesn’t really think before she speaks.
“Bucky look at my sword!” She shouts the second she’s off the elevator pushing her hips toward his face.Sam must have gone to bed or he’d be laughing at the bewildered owlish look on Bucky’s face. Bucky blinks rapidly at her pelvis for a moment before seeing the actual weapon
“That certainly would explain a lot about you Lewis.” Tony sniggers from behind his glass. Darcy glowers.
“As if I would call my hypothetical dick a sword!” She scoffs. “It’d be a Thompson gun” She smirks. Bruce chokes out a laugh and even Tony cracks a smile.
“I happen to be a weapons expert Doll” Bucky winks with a smile. Darcy pats his head affectionately and beams at Thor..
(I know Darcy is American, but I just can’t bring myself to refer to Philosopher’s Stone as Sorcerer’s Stone so assume her copy of the book came from England or something, if you need an excuse for that).
How about Darcy/Steve - making out in the back row of a movie theater
The lights dimmed and Darcy relaxed into her seat. It had been ages since she had gone to a movie alone, but she was certain she wouldn’t be able to convince anyone to see this one with her, which was fine because she enjoyed movies alone anyway. She took a sip of her root beer and took a handful of popcorn as she settled in for the previews. Just as the last preview ended, the seat next to her was suddenly filled by a man that had moved in so quietly that she nearly jumped when she realized he was there. She wondered why this man felt the need to sit right next to her when it was a midday showing and there were so many open seats, but he was quiet so she shrugged it off.
About 20 minutes into the movie the man stretched a bit and slid his arm across the back of her chair, “Really?” she muttered under her breath, preparing to turn and tell the guy off. However, her mind changed when she got a look at the hand connected to the arm and saw an absolutely ridiculous friendship bracelet on the wrist. She knew that bracelet. In fact, she had made that bracelet. That meant her mystery man was Steve.