Dan & Phil Rize Highlights, Aug. 14th 2018

-They started the show with their own version of Hamilton, creatively changing it to “Rize up! Rize up!”

-Phil was wearing his new white merch hoodie, Dan was wearing their tour hat and what I can only describe as the ref shirts they wear at Foot Locker, but like. In a fashiony way?

-Phil talked about his Twitter “countdown” of only one day instead of starting last week like he mentioned in the last Rize show. Dan shamed him for it, especially since Phil apparently had a bunch of gifs prepared for it. Phil said he’s still using the gifs, though

-Phil claimed the one day countdown was better than a real countdown because it’s like finding out that it’s Christmas Eve ON Christmas Eve

-Along with the white hoodie, Phil was telling us about the socks in his Insta story. Dan interupted to say “Phil is selling his own product badly,” and Dan explained that the socks will be purposefully mismatched but following a common theme. They showed us the “fox socks,” one blue sock and one orange with matching foxes

-Dan read someone in the chat’s comment about Phil’s merch: “[They] said ‘king of fashion,’ I read it as 'king of lesbian.’”

-Phil: “Don’t sell your feet. Don’t chop off your feet and sell them, you only have two.”

-Phil: “How have we done over 70 shows? It feels like we’ve done 26.”

-They talked about going home after the show. Phil wondered if London would look the same, Dan said it would probably be post-apocalyptic. Phil agreed, saying “It missed us so much it fell apart.”

-They had to say goodbye to the Princess bus (so named by the bus company, not them, unfortunately). They’re going to miss their bus and their driver, who apparently told them they were the nicest people (imitated by Dan in a thick Southern accent). Dan said it was probably because they were used to people using tour buses to do drugs and have gang bangs

-Phil segued into the next topic with “Speaking of drugs…” to tell us about the bus getting searched at the US/Canada border. Dan liked the border agent because he looked like Tadashi from Big Hero 6. Phil said he told them that they had the cleanest band bus they’d ever seen. Apparently they thought they were a band

-Dan told us they had to get off the bus while they searched for drugs and bombs. Dan: “We have Truth Bombs? Does that count?”

-They have an 18.5 hour flight to Melbourne, and they’ll lose an entire day while they’re in the sky. Phil said they’ll be playing a lot of iSpy, and he might also watch The Greatest Showman. Evidently Dan ugly cried while watching Saving Mr. Banks on a plane recently

-Phil called the Melbourne show “one big boi.” Dan was not amused.

-They talked about filming the LA show and the confetti. Phil said there was a crane camera going across, and he was trying hard not to look at it because he had a bad habit of looking straight at the cameras

-Phil showed off his leg injury again, then had trouble pulling his skinny jeans back down again after

-They had to pass on collabs with a lot of people in LA because they didn’t have time. Phil was especially disappointed about not having time to meet up with Safiya Nygaard, who Dan called “Phil’s fave”

-They went out for Hawaiian poke, and that’s where they found the IRL fizzy milk. They both tried it and liked it, saying it tasted like a slightly better probiotic

-Someone asked about Phil being lactose intolerant, and Phil said he could have about a pint’s worth of milk product before he gets sick. He also said he’s definitely allergic to coconut, but it’s his favorite flavor anyway. He also said he thought chocolate “made everyone’s mouth burn,” and went 20 years of his life before he found out it didn’t

-Someone in the chat asked Phil to rate his merch. Phil: “I rate it an 11 out of….11.”

-Dan said the official ii film will be available to lots of us, but they can’t say where it will be yet

-They enjoyed playing shuffleboard because usually when they go out as a whole crew they play pool. Phil thinks it takes too long, and Dan said Phil at least understands the rules because his family had a pool table

-They went on a tangent about the UK show The Cube

-Dan was asked about the airport age incident. Dan: “What was the airport thing? I do so many things at airports.” Phil, laughing: “They thought you were 16!”

-Dan recapped the age mixup, saying he told them he was 27. Phil: “Are you?” Dan: “I’m 27.” Phil: “You’re 26.” Dan: “….” Phil: “Did you just turn 27? Bad friend!”

-Phil said the person checking his passport was weird too because they said he had the best name, a really beautiful name. Phil thought maybe the guy was flirting with him until he saw his nametag and realized his name was Phil, too. Phil: “Name bros!”

-Dan: “I’m at a point where if Phil says something, I’m not responsible for it. I just let it happen.”

-They argued over what impalas look like and whether or not they have hooves. Dan eventually Googled it

-Phil might watch Big Little Lies on the plane because his mom suggested it and they like watching the same shows and talking about it

-Dan started going off about Nikki Minaj’s new album, and Phil looked like he kind of spaced out the whole time? Bless him, he tried to seem interested at least

-Dan wants to know if there’s a phrase for when something is uncommon, but then as soon as you mention it online, people come out of the woodwork to comment on it. Phil: “Where did they come from? Where did they go? Where did they come from, Cotton Eye Joe?”

-They filmed a new Sims video that is apparently…a lot. Dan: “We cross a line. Morally. Physically. You think we’ve done some questionable things to the characters in this universe already…”

-Phil got Dan to wear his new merch for the Sims video

-They made another video for DAPG, and waffled on about it somewhat nonsensically for a minute. Phil tried to move on “subtley” by pointing out the hotel room painting behind him

-Dan tried to test Phil’s vision without his glasses. Dan held up three fingers, Phil guessed two

-They might do another liveshow next Tuesday after they lose days in the time space continuum on the way to Melbourne. They’ll announce the winners of the Rize giveaway then

-They want to do a live Truth Bombs next liveshow, so they asked us to think of an answer to “How will Dan and Phil die,” and they’ll pull (willing) people into the livestream next time to give their answers and roast them

-They don’t know what time the liveshow will be next week because of timezones

-Dan thinks Australia is a meme, not a real place. Phil: “What happens when we land there??”

-They talked about the Australia pop up shops, which will have tour merch, pastel merch, posters, etc, and props or backgrounds for selfies

-Dan made up a song to say bye to us as the liveshow ended, which quickly turned into a song making fun of Phil for not knowing how to turn off the stream even though it was his own phone

- dan looked so annoyed whenever phil brought up the merch poor lad hes being pressured

- dont @ me but dan really really wanted to fix phils quiff when he put on the hat and it flattened a bit

- that defeaning silence when phil said “my guy” about the airport guy flirting/joking with him. dan was flaming i smelled it from here

- and when phil panicked that it was still on, i felt for him. he was like DAN NO ITS STILL ON DONT U DARE KISS MY CHEEK ITS STILL ON DAN