damned scouts

*BTS at AMAs*

*DNA starts playing*

Armys: KIM NAMJOON KIM SEOKJIN MIN YOONGI JUNG HOS-

Westerners:

5

Oh man, I’ve held on to these for long enough. No longer. NO REGRETS.

@midnightluck and I have tossed around IDEAS for this AU for almost a year now. Bless her men in skirts loving heart she even wrote a thing on it.

Just ENJOY.

JINBE IS THE PROUDEST SCOUT EVER.

Someone: Hey, this isn’t right! Scout doesn’t have a… oh no…

Me: Oh yes, I found a randomizer baby and I’m drawing all the mismatched mercs! (Plus Pauling, Merasmus, The Administerator, Saxton Hale and Bidwell, to keep the numbers even.) It’s a summer project that I’m assigning myself so I don’t die of boredom.

This is Soldier!Scout, next up is Soldier!Medic (link coming soon)

I love PTA Sans. No matter the AU. 

 ~Undertale~  

Helen: It looks like we’ll have to cut funding for the talent show. 

Sans: wait, hold up- what? that’s such crap! why? 

Helen: Well if we want to make the exchange for only gluten free lunches, we’ll have to. 

Sans: what? but there are, like, fifteen other lunch choices without gluten, and the kids can just bring their own lunch- 

Helen: Sans, you’ll just have to deal with it, okay? These lunches are more important than the talent show. 

Sans: Helen, for the love of god, i did not spend all night cutting out box tops just to hear the shit that spills from your mouth.

~Underfell~

Daniel: Well I just think monsters and humans should be separated in the sports teams.

Sans: what? why the fuck would we do that? the teams are perfectly fine, fuckface.

Daniel: It’s unfair to some of the human players, Sans.

Sans: oh, just ‘cause your kid can’t kick a ball fer shit?

Daniel: *huffs* I’m just trying to make it fair.

Sans: no, it sounds like you’re tryna make it segregation.

Daniel: This meeting is for all of our children, not just yours. Just because Frisk works well with monsters, doesn’t mea-

Sans: who gives a fuck?! all your kids are shit!

~Underswap~

Linda: *sees Papyrus* *smirks and walks over with Helen* Hello Papyrus. Sorry your plan for that field trip didn’t go through. 

Papyrus: *shrugs* eh. it happens. it looks like we won’t take the kids to the science museum after all.

Helen: We just don’t have the money to go to there. Maybe we can take them to the local library. That’s far more affordable and interesting to the childre-

Papyrus: the fuck? ha, no. we actually have over twenty thousand bucks for our field trip.

Linda and Helen: *gawk* What? How?!

Papyrus: my bro’s the head booster mom. they just had a fundraiser.

Sans: *bursts in through the door with arms full of cash* WE’RE GOING TO EUROPE! MWEH HEH HEH!

~Swapfell~ ~Fellswap~ ~Whatever the fuck you call the yellow one~

Sans: *looks at his clipboard* *storms over to Gloria* YOU! PARTICULARLY FLESHY HUMAN! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?

Gloria: *blinks in surprise* Huh? What do you mean?

Sans: ARE YOU SERIOUS? ONLY TWENTY DOLLARS IN SALES?

Gloria: It’s only how much my daughter could sel-

Sans: GLORIA THIS IS A FUNDRAISER, NOT THE GOD DAMN GIRL SCOUTS! AS HEAD BOOSTER MOM, I DEMAND THAT MORE EFFORT BE PUT INTO YOUR SALES!

Gloria: Sans, we’ve already sold most of the cookie dough! We don’t-

Sans: DO YOU WANT TO FUCKING LIVE, GLORIA? WE MUST SELL ALL THE COOKIE DOUGH!

~Horrortale~

Sans: *goes over to the snack table* Whoa. *picks up a pumpkin-shaped cookie that’s well designed* whoa. nice work, Sadie. been years since I’ve had cookies. *is about to eat one*

Suzanne: *rushes over* Oh dear. *snatches cookie away and sighs* I told her not to make those Halloween themed cookies! She knows we cancelled the Halloween themed party next week.

Sans: whoa, what? c’mon, why?

Suzanne: Well, we didn’t want to offend your people.

Sans: “my people”?

Suzanne: Why don’t you have some of my non-offensive brownies instead?

Sans: Suz, i’d rather starve than eat your brownies.

Suzanne: Oh yeah! I’m sorry, Sans. I forgot your people are all anorexic.

Sans:…….. hey, why don’t you and your family come over t’dinner, sometime? my bro’s cooking’s to die for. s’on me, pumpkin *winks*

~Altertale~

Sans: *brought some of Asgore’s scones to the meeting*

Lillian: Oh, are these scones? *tries one* Bleh!? ARE these scones?

Sans: *sighs* yes, they are. is there a problem?

Lillian: Whoever made these needs a few cooking lessons. A few dozen.

Sans:…… *picks up phone and begins to dial*

Lillian: Who are you calling?

Sans: for your lesson. *the call picks up*

Toriel: Hey, Sa-

Sans: she insulted the scones.

*the call goes dead*

Toriel: *bursts through the window* WHO THE FUCK-?!

~Underlust~

Helen: Alright, so far I am leading the sales with over two hundred dollars. *smiles to herself* I suppose my Suzy is just determined to help out our school.

Sans: *rolls his eyelights*

Helen: And Sans? How much did Frisk raise?

Sans: two thousand.

Helen: *sputters* Thousand?! How?!

Sans: candles weren’t doin’ it for us. we tried something else.

Helen: *hesitant to ask* What… did you sell?

Sans: well, we decided it was a good idea to post my picture up on craigslist and-

Linda: YOU SOLD YOUR BODY?!

Sans: Paps and the queen were happy to help, too.

Helen: That’s illegal! It’s a crime!

Sans: boo, the only crimes here are your lemon squares and that getup.

~Echotale~

Martha: It just shouldn’t be mandatory to vaccinate our children!

G: *sighs and rubs face* look, Martha, if you don’t vaccinate your kids, they’re gonna fucking die.

Martha: I am NOT letting those people pump those shots of retardedness into my child.

G: that’s not even a proven-

Martha: I’m sorry; what kind of certification do YOU have?!?

G:*blinks and digs into his pocket* huh? whoa. what’s this? *pulls out his PhD* whoa! huh, i didn’t even know that was in there. *looks at Martha* weird, huh?

~Outertale~

Helen: My child has straight A’s.

Linda: My child made class president.

Sans: my child flew into outer space and freed an entire race. *puts on sunglasses* far out, bitches. *disappears*

10

BTS as Animated Characters~ (5/7)


Park Jimin // Prince Eric (The Little Mermaid)


“I tell you, we will have the finest furniture in all of Ferelden.”

He had to admit he had zoned out of much of the chatter as they drank. Pointless small talk about drapery, and carpets and-

“Particularly the desks.”

“Oh, the desks are good, so I hear.”



“Sturdy is what I have heard.”



“Mh. Well, Cullen has the largest out of us all…desk that is. Perhaps we should ask for his consideration?”

He glanced up, suddenly aware of a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. “It’s, er…a desk? A fine desk? No complaints.”

“But Commander, do tell.” Dorian’s smirk grew to a positively mammoth grin, curling at the edges as he leant forward. “Tell us your thoughts on just how sturdy a desk should be.”



And he froze. 

Maker, how could they possibly know…

He couldn’t help the colour that had started to rush to his cheeks, deliberately refusing to meet the eyes he knew were locked on him, awaiting his response. A quick, sideways glance to Dorian once more confirmed his worst fears - the smug bastard knew.

Andraste, preserve me.

“You’ve gone a very adorable shade of magenta, Commander. Something you’d like to impart upon us?”

“N-No!” He managed to splutter, forcing himself to look at the assembled parties around him. “I have n-no idea what you are…to suggest…nonsense!”



“Really?” Bull’s deep voice cut in. “I heard some most interesting news floating around camp this week.”

“Did you really? Why, I wonder if it was the same news that managed to reach my ears too?”

There was a chorus of sniggering, and Cullen began to twitch, starting to rise to his feet.

“I should really get back to-“



Bull’s hand on his back caught his armour, pushing him back down in his seat. “No, no, Commander. Five more minutes. Indulge us.”

“Would someone like to tell me what I am missing here?” Cassandra was staring over her flagon, an eyebrow raised, and Dorian’s shit-eating grin grew wider.

“Yeah, Curly. It’s rude to leave the lady out of our discussion.” Of course Varric would be supporting this.

“I do not think it is gossip that the Lady Seeker would be even remotely interested in!”

Gossip? Are you saying there is no truth to it, Commander?” Smug bastard.

“Would someone care to explain to what exactly is going on?” Cassandra’s patience was wearing thin.

“My Lady Seeker, we were simply passing through the barracks earlier this week when we happened upon some interesting information. A scout by the name of Jim-“

Jim?!”  That damned scout. He would swing him from the tower when he saw him next.

“Happened to be passing along the ramparts when he saw a most flabbergasting proposition…Imagine, the dear Commander and the Herald of Andraste…testing out the very limits of our fine desks…”

“Perhaps that is why…“ Holy preserve him, not Josephine too. “There was a most interesting comment from our dear Inquisitor, enquiring as to why Commander Rutherford had a very large hole in the roof of his personal quarters that had not been repaired.”

There was silence, and Cullen wholeheartedly agreed that if a rift were to open above him, and a demon to seize him, he would have gone willingly into the Void.

“Curly? Anything to add to that, or have we got the story covered? I do like to be thorough. Remember, the Maker is watching and knows your heart, and all that jazz, so no lying.”

He saw the dawn in Cassandra’s eyes as they shifted to him, and he felt the sweat on his palms under her scrutiny. Maker, he hadn’t been this embarrassed since he was a mere boy, and damned Mia had told his parents about…

You and the Inquisitor?”

It was a fruitless endeavour to continue to pretend now, and he gave in with a heaving sigh, mumbling into his flagon as he drained it.

Sweet Maker, I need more wine.”

The table erupted into a roar of laughter and shouts, and he laid his head against the table, burying it beneath an armoured arm, Dorian’s slap to the back stinging even through the armour.

It was going to be a long, long night.

Meh my one and only inktober piece that I’ve ever made and I dedicate it to my favourite game :’) I just had to do that didn’t I? Well now I can say that I’ve drawn every merc at least twice lol

BIGHIT : * release random stuff everyday *
Me : * scratch her head * can you guys … ..umm.. release ..you know .. music related stuff already .. just saying .
BIGHIT :
Me :
BIGHIT : * release random stuff everyday *

what if jimin really liked jungkook’s cover of WDTA when he first released it and couldn’t stop listening to it and really wanted to hear how it would sound like if he did the cover too so he secretly made a copy of the mp3 file and started playing around with it and sang only selena’s part cause he still didn’t feel confident enough to sing the entire song in english but he worked really hard on it and then one day jungkook was snooping around his stuff and found his cover and was like “dude wtf hyung this is so good” and jimin was like “omg tell me you didn’t listen to it” and jungkook was like “fuck yeah i did” and jimin was like “oh god pls don’t tell anyone” and jungkook was like “nope too bad already told namjoon hyung and bang pd to put it in this year’s festa” and that’s how we got WDTA pt. 2

to those of you not watching koc know that the guys have been pulling genuine ideas from goddamn fanfic

they have an entire “i accidentally married my best friend” episode and the way it’s acted out is exactly the way i would have done it in a comic please watch this