dakota red

10

2017 Academy Awards Red Carpet

Headcanon:

Agents Maine and Washington are the only ones on the Mother of Invention who know sign language. And, like, they’re ALWAYS TALKING IN IT like super long, fast conversations. Wash will be talking to Connie and simultaneously signing to Maine at the same time. Maine will laugh. (Well. Chuckle. Maine doesn’t -laugh-.)

Everyone is really fuckin curious because Maine doesn’t talk, except he and Wash have conversations that last hours and no one understands what they’re saying (except maybe Florida? But who knows with that fucker)

So, like, Maine and Wash get sent on this super long mission, like a few weeks. And York spends the entire time on the internet learning sign language. He’s determined.

Finally the pair gets back and York is ready, so fuckin ready to see -

- and Wash and Maine are signing the bee movie to each other.

(York runs crying into North’s room. North throws him a bottle of vodka and sighs.)

anonymous asked:

Hey hey it's me again. Mystery anon. (Am I going overboard with the asks? I hope this isn't getting creepy--you're just such a wonderful cinnamon roll) artblock sucks man. How about the agents of project freelancer? Maybe they're all bonding together? Someone's getting pranked? Or for once in their lives they get a break. Wait. What if they found a cat? Wash would be all over it. Picture a lil kitty sleepin on Maine. It'd be great. Best wishes to you, Panther!

you say a kitten sleeping on maine and i raise you multiple kittens sleeping on sleepy maine

awaaaaaaaaaah anon you’re so great and i’m really glad you’ve been sending me so many asks~~

i suppose now is a good time as any to promote my rvb ask blog? @ask-the-freelancers is almost up and running- as soon as i finish making the ‘ask box is open’ sign i’ll start accepting stuff.

who u should fight rvb freelancer version
  • York: York’s a great guy who could also probably like, rip you in half but tbh I feel like he’s that guy in the group who makes endless puns and dick jokes so, hey, punch him and then run away, lock a door behind you, and you’ll be fine. Fight York.
  • Carolina: I mean. I don’t know what show you’ve been watching, I really don’t. Jesus Horatio Christ on a popsicle don’t fight Carolina.
  • Washington: Wash has had the shittiest life ever. Of all time. Do not fight Wash give Wash chocolate and love.
  • South Dakota: True, South will rip you to tiny bitty little shreds, okay yeah but she got North killed and Theta lost and just... if you can fight South pls go for it
  • North Dakota: Why would you fight him. Why. North wants to give you a blanket and a cup of tea and talk about Grifball with you why would you fight him? Also if you did fight him he'd shoot you from three miles away. You're not nearly good enough to even get near him to actually fight him so don't bother. Don't fight North.
  • Texas: IF YOU FUCK WITH TEX YOU'LL BE ON YOUR KNEES FOR SURE
  • Maine: If you want death, then yes, fight Maine. But don't actually. Either he'd punch you once and you'd explode or he'd pick you up by the scruff of your neck and place you on a really high shelf or something. Don't fight Maine.
  • Connecticut: CONNIE IS A GOOD HUMAN BEING WHO'S TRYING TO DO THE RIGHT THING DON'T FUCKING FIGHT CT
  • Wyoming: Please rip his mustache off. Fight Wyoming.
  • Florida: That's like the worst idea ever ok look Florida is a chill honestly nice dude who will slather you with compliments and mean them but you will not last 0.0002 seconds in a fight with him. Nah he isn't on the leaderboard but that's probably cos he's like, way too cool for that shit okay don't fight Florida. Let Florida hug you.
  • Iowa: why would you do that that's like fighting Caboose except a Caboose who's never killed anyone okay it's like fighting Caboose's more innocent twin if that's possible DON'T FIGHT IOWA
  • Georgia: Yeah go ahead fight Georgia he seems like a dick. Also he probably sucks I mean we all know what happened to Georgia you might even win. Fight Georgia.
  • Ohio: bruh don't fight Ohio, set Ohio up with Sherry
  • Idaho: ehhhhhhhhhhh I feel like that would be a dick move. Don't fight Idaho.
  • Utah: how can you fight utah you don't even know what utah looks like