This past Sunday, I was briefly at a Swedish Lutheran church for a special Lucia-themed event, it being the Sunday closest to St Lucia Day (today, 12/13).
To say I felt like a Jewish spy is to simplify my often-confused feelings on faith.
It was my old light-up crown that the church’s Lucia was wearing, and yet the discussions of saints made me uncomfortable and an outsider. In the past, I have tried to visually reconcile my dual-religion upbringing by depicting them in concert, together: as a dark-haired girl dressed as Sankta Lucia, a self-portrait lighting a menorah. But in this volatile age and devoid of my personal context, that would be an image of assimilation rather than reconciliation. So I suppose I’ll leave it to you to decide if these girls are lighting the same menorah or not.
[Image description: Roses colored to match the ace flag. In the middleis a rose facing outward colored light purple, around it are roses facing radially outward colored white, grey, and black. The black and grey roses are paired along the diagonals while the white roses are smaller and in all four directions]