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Me Meeting My Brand New Neighbor While Outside Smoking
  • Dad: *Inside Watching Wrestling* "OH MY GOD!"
  • Neighbor: "Is he alright?"
  • Me: "Probably."
  • Neighbor: "Well, you look all dressed up to just be out here smoking."
  • Me: "While I appreciate the sentiment, I'm married to my work."
  • Neighbor: "That's fine. I'm married as well... To my wife."
  • Me: "..."
  • Neighbor: "..."
  • Me: "..."
  • Neighbor: "..."
  • Me: "..."
  • Neighbor: "I believe in Sherlock Holmes... I like your shoelaces... Cinnamon."
  • Me: "..."
  • Neighbor: "G'night, peasant."
  • Me: "YOU CANT DROP A BOMB SHELL LIKE THAT AND JUST WALK AWAY!"
  • Neighbor: "I do what I want, Thor."
  • Me: *Whispers* "We're gonna be best friends for life."
  • Neighbor: "I can hear you!"
If You Don't Stand with John Green, Unfollow Me

if you have a problem with John Green writing teen novels, unfollow me right fucking now

its stupid to say that just because he’s a “grown man” he cant write books for teens

maybe when the average teen can string together a coherent sentence, they can write books for “their” genre

also, fuckfaces, here’s a news flash: ADULTS READ TEEN NOVELS