d 30

Asky thing

@mommylovescake sent me an asky thingy. Thank you for thinking of me.

A. Age: 46
B. Biggest fear: losing people I love, disappointing people. And deep water.
C. Current time: 6:30 CST
D. Drink you last had: some red wine with dinner
E. Every day starts with: wanting to go back to sleep
F. Favorite song: still Till Death Do Us Part by Apocalyptica
G. Ghosts, are they real? I don’t know. Maybe
H. Hometown: Albuquerque. I was born in Seattle, but grew up in NM.
I. In love with: Chris, James, Julian
J. Jealous of: practically everyone. It’s a problem
K. Killed someone: no!
L. Last time you cried: yesterday.
M. Middle name: Marie
N. Number of siblings: just one
O. One wish: to be closer to James so I can see him more often without leaving Chris behind
P. Person last texted: James
Q. Questions you’re always asked: I’m a teacher… My life is questions. So many questions!
R. Reasons to smile: so many things to smile about. I love and I’m loved. Pets. Good food. Trees.
S. Song last sang: ummm I was singing along with Boston earlier today
T. Time you woke up: 7ish
U. Unwear color: purple
V. Vacation destination: anywhere
W. Worst habit: taking this personally/too seriously
X. X-rays you’ve had: just my collarbone when I was a kid. And teeth, for the dentist
Y. There’s no y??
Z. Zodiac sign: Gemini/Taurus cusp

I guess I’ll tag @wisconsinwarlock and @codenamedutchess because I always want to know more about them.

I was tagged by @open-coffin thank you so much sweetie!

A-Age: 15
B-Biggest fear: Spiders and abandonment 
C-Current time: 2:30 pm
D-Drink you last had: Water
E-Everyday starts with: Internal screaming 
F-Favorite song: I can’t choose because there are too many
G-Ghosts, are they real: Yeah I think so, but not like the scary movie ones
H-Hometown: Naaaaahhhh m8 people don’t need to know that
I-In love with: Cats dogs and plants tbh
J-Jealous of: A lot of people
K-Killed someone: Nothing you can prove
L-Last time you cried: I don’t remember 
M-Middle name: Haven’t decided yet
N-Number of siblings: 5 step siblings and 0 biological siblings 
O-One wish: To be happy. Also, to be an isolated sheep herder in scotland or a writer who lives by a brook
P-Person you last called/texted: My friend Zusteller
Q-Question you’re always asked: I don’t even know
R-Reasons to smile: Cats and dogs and plants
S-Song last sang: Great Big White World by Marilyn Manson, and a few things I wrote too
T-Time you woke up: about 6 in the morning
U-Underwear color: Black
V-Vacation destination: Anywhere but here
W-Worst habbit: So many, and they’re all bad for me
X-X-rays you’ve had: My arm and teeth, and an ultrasound on my stomach
Y-Your favorite food: Chocolate cheesecake probably
Z-Zodiac sign: Gemini

I tag: @elsary @jessuthesmolbirb @helloimjess @notanormalusername and anyone else who wants to do this!

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.

Game Grumps animated of “Mad dDog McCree” gameplay

I did this as an semester project for uni. Had to cut a few things out otherwise I wouldn’t have finished it in time. Hope you like it anyway!

Looking back, I can’t remember the truth. I blew everything out of proportion so I could feel the hurt and betrayal and write about it in vivid detail. It was my own method of torture. My own undoing; and I enjoyed every second of it.
—  c.j.n.