You made a vine about heartache and someone saying "ill only break your heart."that drastically altered the way I looked at the people. Now if someone says "im a wolf with gnashing teeth and i think you're delicious " i don't think "well may Be he's vegetarian". I go shit I believe you and totally peace the fuck out. Like thanks. I know it was just a 6 second vine. But it changed me for the better.
that was honest to god the purpose of that vine
yeah its 6 seconds and said comically but there are so many things I wish I was told as an adolescent - this being one of them.
these people, men and women alike, start off the dating process by saying things like “ill only break your heart” or “i suck at relationships” or “I always do the wrong thing” so that a) you can soothe them, reassure them that’s not true so that they can feel better about themselves and b) they can use that back at you when the dating inevitably fails (i.e. “i told you id break your heart idk what you expected”) so it’s a way to not take any responsibility for their behavior while simultaneously getting consoled for their behavior - always using the other individual in the process and never actually getting better no matter how much this individual “helps” them. Most of the time this type of behavior is completely unintentional and deals with someone stuck in a cycle of abusive behavior paired with self-hatred; using people to soothe that lack of love for themselves and then pinning the blame on the other person for “not knowing better” that “they were bad”
so i’m so touched and thrilled that the message effectively went across the way it was supposed to! ultimately these people need help and i know often their partners/friends take up the role of therapist and punching bag when they’re not being paid to do so - but i think the lesson here is to know your worth and what you’re willing to put up with. regardless of how good of a person Joe is, if Joe is unaware of how abusive he’s being, you are in no way obligated to stay in that friendship/relationship. You’re a person and not every individual you come across is going to be what’s best for you. ♡