You: Nothing much, just on Netflix looking for a movie to watch. How about you?
Me: I’m just laying in bed thinking about things.
You: What’s on your mind?
Me: …I think it’s best if I just kept that to myself.
You: You sure?
Me: Well, I don’t know…would you judge me?
You: Come on, you’ve known me long enough to know that I would lmao.
You: But I promise to not judge you too much.
Me: Gee, thanks ass.
Me: Well, um, so there’s this girl who’s been on my mind for quite sometime now (and by sometime, I mean about the entirety of my time being acquainted with the girl).
You: Cuuuuuuteeee lmao
Me: Yeah, I mean, I think by now it’s safe to say that I’ve developed quite the crush on her, but I’ve been hiding it for as long as I’ve known this girl. The reason I’ve been carrying this crush within me for so long is because I love her.
Me: Not the romantic, head-over-heels, I’ve became obsessed with her kind of love, but the kind of love you develop for someone when their persona is admirable.
You: What do you mean?
Me: Like, you look towards that person as someone who makes you better simply by just being in their presence. You see, that girl’s presence became more important to me than my selfish act of having a crush on her. I saw pass my crush, and focused on the friendship the girl and I shared. In reality, it was a very twisted, friendship that I shared with the girl. We would tease and make fun of each other…a lot. Like, if we weren’t teasing each other, we were eating or actually conversing about something. I enjoyed the twisted friendship the girl and I shared, but there were days when I wanted more. Deep down inside, I knew I did not only want to be mean to this girl, but a part of me wanted to be extra nice to her too. A part of me wanted to hug her more often, speak to her (like actually talk to her), and hold her hands. A part of me wanted that more than anything in the world, but there was another part of me that knew the tragic truth.
You: And what’s the truth?
Me: That part of me knew that such reality cannot exist. It knew how incompatible I truly am with a person like such. That part of me feared more than anything else that if the truth of my emotions were to come out, I would lose the girl all together. Would she be creeped out and just cast me away like any and every other guy? That fear went on for so long, and it’s been bothering me for as long as I’ve held it in.
You: You shouldn’t let that stop you. Girls aren’t always out to reject guys. I think you should tell her how you feel.
You: Stop being a pussy. Text her right now!
Me: Lmao, wait, I’m not finished yet.
Me: Time went on, and that fear began to slowly lift due to another fear consuming its predecessor. I was beginning to fear that holding something in like this for so long can do no good for me, and can cause me to regret this, for a long time.
You: I still don’t understand why you are wasting time texting me. Text her right now! Let her know!
Me: You sure?
You: Of course man, if you never do it, you’ll never know, and you’ll live your life regretting that decision.
You: Good luck! <3
Me: I won’t need it, I already told my crush how I felt about her.
You: How’d she take it?
Me: I don’t know, I’m still waiting for you to tell me.