Me: Oh my I’m a closeted gay so I must hide my sexuality in the straightest way possible so my family and friends won’t suspect a thing

Also Me: only watches shows where there are gay characters* *gets REALLY excited when a favorite actress appears on the screen and speaks about her the whole movie/episode* *is super touchy with her girl friends* *does uninterested faces when the “dating boys” subject comes up* *listens Hayley Kiyoko*

Me: Mom…….. I’m gay

Mom: Uhum.

Me: wa… Did you know it?

Mom: Uhum..

Me: H-how?

Mom: Uhummmmmm….

Flashback:

Mom: sooooo, I saw you speaking with that boy over there….;););)

Me: *not even taking my eyes off the cellphone’s screen* Yeah he’s cool.

***

Mom: Hmm, who’s that girl? I don’t remember seeing her bef–

Me: OH YEah, we JUST MET like, ten minutes ago, she’s SO NICE she has such a good music taste and she’s so smart and funny her laugh is so cute actually she’s entirely super cute and her hair–