curb skateboarding

I JUMPED IN SLOW MOTION
  • OFF
    • THE
      • CURB

WITHOUT A SKATEBOARD THAT SHOULD LOOK ABSURD

BUT WITH A

  1. FISH
    1. EYE
      1. LENS
          1. HEY
            1. HAVEN’T
              1. YA
                1. HEARD
                  1. GOT 
                  2. THE
                  3. MOVES
                  4. SO
                  5. SMOOTH

MAKE YER MOM SAY

“Those are some exceptionally smooth moves!” 

anonymous asked:

Could you possibly write a Spidey-pool where Peter flunk a test and is out of sorts? I had a. Ad math test and I feel like Spidey-pool is just what the doctor orders :) whenever you get the time, thanks :) love your writing style :)

I’m so sorry this took so long! Hope everything is going well. Don’t worry about math, I was never good at it and I’ve done fine through adulthood. That’s what calculators are for! 

—————————

Peter slumped down and sat on the curb with his skateboard on his lap and his backpack falling off his shoulder. He wondered what the hell he was going to tell Aunt May when she asked about his math midterm. He couldn’t tell her he’d gotten an D on it. He just couldn’t. 

Maybe if he was lucky she wouldn’t remember it had even happened. But who was he kidding? May made sure to pay attention to that kind of thing. She cared deeply about his grades and usually Peter did great in all his classes. He had just forgotten to study because he’d been busy stopping a bank robbery. But it wasn’t like he could tell his math professor or Aunt May that. 

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he was grateful for the distraction. Please don’t be May he begged as he glanced at the screen. 

Instead he found a text message from Deadpool of all people. 

Hey Spidey! Back in town and looking for a bit of fun. Wanna hang? XX 

Peter found himself grinning in spite of himself. Deadpool was always trying to get Peter to be his friend. He knew the forced nonchalance of the text was Deadpool trying to play it cool. Luckily for Wade, Peter was in need of a distraction and didn’t feel like going home. 

I thought I told you to stay out of my city? 

But then how would I catch a glimpse of dat ass? 

Plenty of pictures in the Daily Bugle. 

I know. You have no idea how many times I’ve spanked it to those blurry photos. They don’t do you justice, Spidey. 

Gross. 

Not my fault you do things to me, baby boy. 

If I come over will you promise to behave? 

Absolutely not. 

Peter laughed out loud and pocketed his phone. Feeling in slightly higher spirits, he dropped his skateboard down and started towards to apartment Wade kept in the Bronx. It was a couple of subway stops away but Peter didn’t mind. It wasn’t as fast as the way he normally traveled, but he didn’t feel like suiting up just to go to Wade’s. 

Although Peter was normally very big on the whole secret identity thing, he had finally revealed the truth to Wade. He knew Wade was batshit but Wade also didn’t have many friends and he was devoted to the few he did have. Peter knew Wade would never sell him out (mostly because Wade had chopped off his own hand to prove he wouldn’t talk under any circumstances. It had been disgusting but also amazingly reassuring). 

Peter’s nose was accosted by the familiar smell of taco meat and BO that was Wade Wilson’s apartment the second he got onto the right floor of the high rise Wade called home. Plugging his nose, he opened the unlocked door and made his way inside. Wade never bothered locking door, always saying that there was nothing worth stealing and no one that could be killed inside. Besides, Wade would consider an intruder some kind of fun time. 

Peter grabbed the can of Febreeze he had stored under the sink and began spraying it around the apartment so that it smelled of “meadows and rain.” Once the air was no longer toxic, Peter took his hand away from his nose and glanced around. He found a half full pizza box and sniffed it carefully. Deeming the contents safe, he placed it into the microwave and watched it turn. 

His spidey sense tingled and he turned around to find Wade sneaking forward on his tiptoes. “Damn it!” Wade cursed, snapping his fingers. “You’re impossible to sneak up on!” 

Peter laughed and shook his head. “I know, that’s kind of the point.”

Wade finished walking over and pulled Peter into a bear hug. “Did you miss me, Spidey?” 

Peter struggled against the larger man, attempting to free himself. “If I say yes, will you let go of me?” 

Wade huffed and dropped Peter. “No appreciation.”

Peter laughed. “It’s good to see you, Wade.”

Wade tilted his masked face to the side. “Is it?”

Peter rolled his eyes and turned back to the microwave, pulling out the piece of pizza and taking a bite. “Are you calling me a liar?” he challenged, wiping the sauce from the corner of his mouth.

“No…” Wade said slowly as if processing this. “So if it’s good to see me, does that mean we can make out?”

Peter chuckled and shook his head. “Wouldn’t that require you taking off your mask?” Peter had only seen Wade without his mask a few times and Wade had always been horribly self-conscious about it. Twitchy and on edge as if all he wanted was his mask back on.

“I’d do that for you, Petey.” 

Peter took another bite of pizza and mulled it over. Despite everything, he liked Wade quite a bit. He licked his lips and Wade stared intently at his mouth. Peter couldn’t help feeling slightly flattered that he had that kind of effect on someone. 

He dropped the crust back onto the plate once he was done and took a step forward. He cautiously reached forward and began to roll Wade’s mask up to his nose. Wade wasn’t in his full costume, foregoing the leather and spandex for a pair of sweats and a hoodie. 

As he pressed his lips to Wade’s, Wade seemed to stiffen up as if he was a frightened deer. Peter gently rubbed his thumb against Wade’s scarred cheek, urging him to relax and open up.

After a few more moments of awkwardness, Peter pulled back and raised an eyebrow. “For someone who wanted to make out with me, you’re sure not putting much effort into this.”

“I didn’t think you’d actually do it,” Wade admitted, still standing frozen in place.

Peter blushed and ducked his head down. He was overcome with embarrassment at the thought that maybe Wade had just been joking and hadn’t actually wanted to kiss him. “I - I should go,” Peter said, looking around for his backpack and carefully avoiding looking at Wade.

“Baby boy,” Wade said, grabbing Peter carefully by the arm. “Why on Earth would you want to kiss a freak like me?”

Peter clenched his fist in Wade’s hoodie and yanked him close. “You’re not a freak,” he said with conviction through gritted teeth.

“That’s a lie,” Wade said with a heavy sigh. “But thanks for saying it.”

Peter narrowed his eyes. “Kiss me,” he demanded, reaching up and pulling Wade’s mask off the rest of the way.

Wade’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second and then he jumped into action. Peter gasped as he was backed up against the nearest wall and his mouth was dominated by Wade’s. They were each gripping each other so that there was no space between them, Wade’s larger body pressed against Peter’s smaller frame. 

Wade’s tongue was hot and slick against Peter’s as the kiss deepened. Keening with want, Peter attempted to pull Wade even closer but there was nowhere left. 

“I’ve got you, baby boy,” Wade murmured against his lips. “I’ve got you.”

Peter whimpered and Wade’s tongue slipped back into his mouth and teased his own. Wade’s hands released Peter for a moment only to slide down and grip his ass, lifting him up off the ground completely. Peter wrapped his legs instinctively around Wade. 

“I don’t understand,” Wade whispered, breaking the kiss but not going far, pressing his forehead against Peter’s. “I don’t understand how you can let me do this kind of stuff when I look like this.”

“Shut up,” Peter said, his breathing labored. “Don’t overthink it, okay? After the day I’ve had, the last thing i want to do is think.”

“No thinking, got it,” Wade said with a tiny nod. “So you were having a bad day and decided to come over here?” 

Peter huffed. “That sounds a lot like thinking to me.”

“No, I just…” Wade grinned widely. “Sounds an awful lot like you thought I could cheer you up. And you didn’t even know we were going to make out!” 

“What’s your point?”

“Petey, do you like me?” Wade asked, giggling. “Do you like like me?” 

“Oh my god, Wade, shut up!” Peter said, placing his hand over his face to hide his blush. “We were just kissing, obviously I like you.”

“Not necessarily,” Wade said with a shrug, lowering Peter down from the wall. “There’s plenty of reasons to make out with someone.”

Peter groaned. “Let’s just watch a movie or something.”

“Is this a date?” Wade asked, following Peter over towards the sofa. 

“No, it’s not,” Peter said, flopping down and crossing his arms over his chest. “Keep this up and you’ll never get one with me.” 

Wade mimed zipping his mouth closed and sat down next to Peter, close enough that their thighs were touching. Peter grabbed the remote and flipped through netflix, putting on The Usual Suspects. 

Wade managed to stay quiet through the opening titles. “So you’re saying there’s potential for a date in the future?” he asked, turning towards Peter.

Peter took a deep breath. “What are you doing this Friday night?” 

Wade hummed to himself for a moment. “Nothing that couldn’t be rearranged.”

“Good,” Peter said, taking Wade’s hand in his own. “It’s a date. Now shut up and let me watch the movie.”

“Whatever you say, dear.”