cubbies

anonymous asked:

is it bad to want to be a little all the time?

Well, if you’re a little, I believe you’re always a little, even when you act big.

However, if you mean “be in littlespace”, I’d say it’s not inherently bad to want to be little all the time. I think most of us wish life could be that simple, happy, and carefree.
But, if you want to be little all the time to escape something, then I would say it’s not good for you. Using little space as a form of coping is fine, as long as there is something being done to try to heal the problems you are trying to cope with in the first place (some form of therapy, for example), and/or you’re not using being little just to numb yourself. Healthy coping strategies for life in general are vital. But, if it becomes something used to escape the same something all the time, something that is still big, raw and painful, that strategy is no longer working.

Coping is for dealing, therapy is for healing. Numbing and escaping are for avoiding dealing and healing.

Coping is for dealing with the negative feelings from events it situations in your life in order to solve them. It’s to reduce stress or calm you, but with the ultimate goal of problem solving or relieving painful emotions and/or stress associated with it/them.

Therapy is used for actively working toward healing something. Finding out what the cause of the problem is, or reaffirming it if already known, and working on ways to overcome it, heal, reduce the pain in size and severity.

Coping mechanisms can turn into a problem if overused, used to numb, used in unhealthy ways, used to escape, not deal with what you’re feeling. Regardless of how often you use that coping mechanism, the problem is always still there because you can only run from it so long.

So, I believe the *desire* to be in littlespace 24/7 isn’t harmful, provided it is more like wishful thinking. But wanting it as a form of escapism is.

The big world still calls us and, as sad, scary and overwhelming as it can be, we still have to face it. All we can do is punch that dumb, scary world right in it’s face and keep on trying our best, whatever our best may be!

Hopefully that made some sense 😓 I’m bad at this.

Well, if it turns out that all I did was ramble like a dingleberry doofus, I hope I didn’t take up too much of your time!

Have a super lovely day, please! 😊

💕🤗😙

instagram

THIS FUCKING TEAM

anonymous asked:

I'm kind of new to the little community and I really want little friends, but I really don't know how to go about that. Any suggestions?

Hello, sweet little!

Welcome to the community! I’m so glad you’re here!! 🤗🤗😙😙💕💕

My only suggestion is, if you see someone you think you’d get along with, just say hello! 😊

You can always send them an anonymous ask first to see if they’d be open to making a new friend, to maybe ease some worry. You can also check their about section to see if they state that they are open to receiving messages or looking for little friends.

But, you never know unless you say hello! I know it can be really, really scary to put yourself out there like that 😞 but, once you say hello, the scariest part is over!
There are also plenty of posts going around that are essentially “I’m looking for little friends” (if I see one, I’ll add it to this post).
You can even create one yourself and I’d be more than happy to reblog it to help you find some little friends! 😊

There are a lot of friendly people in this community looking to make new friends! The only way to find those friends is to reach out to them! My 2 best friends on here reached out and said hello to me and we’ve been talking almost every day ever since! 😁

So, whether you decide to message someone, create a post to look for friends, or wait to see if I (hopefully) find one that’s already established, I hope you find a super wonderful friend! Every little deserves little friends! 💖

💕🤗💕

Never heard from this Anon again..

So, I guess I’ll just post like this and cross my fingers that they see it! 😕

Full ask for context:
hey so i was wondering since you seem to be so popular would you kindly spread the word about a little with the username
-redacted- ? In a previous blog she had (now deleted) she reposted art that my little made for someone else and after my little went to ask her, kindly might i mention, to please either credit her properly or take it down because it was art meant for another little and not her.
But after the message was sent my little was called every nasty word under the rainbow. She refused to take down the image and told her own ‘many followers’ to block/ignore my little for being ‘a nasty uncooperative little who doesn’t need or deserve the money for her art’ of course I’m leaving out a bunch of derogatory terms in that quote.
She refuses to listen to reason and her own daddy seems to encourage the behavior. Any direct message no matter how kind it is will be met with curse words and verbal abuse. I’m not asking you to attack her in any way I just would like my little and all other littles to be a bit safer in this community since we as a whole get targeted so often. And the only reason I’m sending this all on anon is because my ddlg blog is a side blog and I’d rather not be targeted on my personal. Thank you.

Hello *hugs*

I really am truly sorry for what happened to your little. Some people can be very thoughtless, hurtful and irrational. 😞

However, I hope you can understand how this puts me in bit of a pickle. You see, I absolutely want to keep littles safe, I hate seeing littles hurt, I hate seeing ANYONE hurt and I especially hate when littles attack other littles. The reason I run this blog, even on days when I don’t feel like doing anything, not even blogging, the reason I spend a long time, sometimes hours, coming up with thoughtful responses to asks is because I want littles, all people, to feel safe talking to me, coming to me for help or comfort, and, if I can, to make them feel good by posting happy, cute and positive things.
But, at the same time, I just don’t feel comfortable with this.

I wasn’t involved in this, I have never heard of this blogger or any other interactions with her, I don’t have anything at all to go on other than one side of the story and someone’s word. With nothing but one side, I just don’t feel it right to publish a username to thousands of people, more if it’s shared. I feel posting something that says “this person did this”, “look out for them” on someone’s word, knowing that people may not just block her, but may also harass her (I can’t control what people do with this information) is a form of attacking her.

And since I don’t know anything of what happened other than your anonymous ask, I also have to acknowledge the possibility, however small that may be, that this story could have been made up to attack her. To be very clear, I am NOT AT ALL saying this is the case here! I’m just saying I *have* seen that done to hurt people and don’t want to take the risk of potentially participating in something like that.

I have really put a lot of thought into this, I’ve even talked it over with my daddy, and I just truly feel like it wouldn’t be right to do this. It does feel the same as attacking her to me. When I’m broadcasting her name and this story to many people, I could very well be inviting people to harass her along with it, whether I asked them to or not. People on Tumblr have harassed people, even sent death threats, over much less. This is also asking me to open *myself* up to being targeted by this person you’ve described as irrational, vulgar and quick to attack, which is something you didn’t want for yourself, as was your reason stated for sending this on Anon.

There is a reason I don’t openly take sides in anything, why I avoid matters of opinion and debate, getting involved in other’s fights, things of that nature. It’s not because I don’t have feelings and opinions of my own on these matters, it’s because I want my blog to stay a safe, happy, welcoming, neutral space. If I start posting usernames of people to basically tell my followers and others to shun them, I am shattering that.

I do reblog some not so happy things if someone is a danger or potential danger to others. And while she was very mean and cruel, and I’m very, very sorry your little had to go through that, without evidence or another story from another little, this seems like a problem between her and your little. It’s not nice at all, it’s shameful behavior, and I understand why you asked this of me. However, I’m not the person to do it. This happened to your little, not me.

So, that being said, if you feel it’s important to spread the word about her, my suggestion is to have the person who was hurt by her do it. Create a post, with evidence, screenshots, and tell the story of what she did. You can include the swearing to drive the point of her viciousness home while warning people at the top that lots of swearing will be involved. Then try to spread that around if you feel it necessary. People will reblog, block, possibly harass if they see it and think it’s the right thing to do. You could be opening this little up to harassment on a potentially larger scale. I doubt that’s what you want. She doesn’t sound like a nice person if she did this, not does her daddy if he encourages it, but, well, I’m sure you’ve seen the anon hate some people get. Since I didn’t experience it myself, you have to ask yourself, does she deserve that? Don’t ask yourself as a daddy (I assume daddy since you said “ddlg") who would probably do anything to defend your little! Ask yourself as a fellow human being. People on Tumblr can be evil.

However, if this problem can be solved by ignoring and blocking this person, giving your little some extra love and affection, that route *may* be the correct one to take. What happened was really wrong, but, they say “an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind”. Another fear I have is that if you do that, or if I posted this with her username, she may harass your little worse. If I post something and it spreads, she’ll know it was you or your little who asked me to do so. If you worry about being targeted just for sending the ask, she’ll definitely target your little once she knows you “told on her”, for lack of a better term.

If there is a way to resolve this peacefully, please try that. Think of all possible outcomes before you make a move. I know you’re upset, you’re a daddy! What daddy wouldn’t want justice for their little angel!? I understand completely. But, sometimes seeking justice can leave things even worse than where they started.

I’m sorry I could not be of more help to you and, really, I truly am sorry that this happened to your little. But, I really hope you understand my position. Please take care.

💕🤗