I agree with the critical post you reblogged but i dont get what you mean by their pasts are being obliterated? The virignal coding of emma?
This took a while, but I really wanted to think about it,
and it’s still messy and vague, so be ye warned. To be honest, this reply got backspaced a load of different
times because you got me really considering the depths of why I feel this way.
My immediate answer was that what I see (in this whole 6B arc
especially) is Killian Jones, previously defined by his previous role of command,
the things he holds sentimental and dear, his visual cues, and his familial ties having
all that tucked away or dismissed in favour of neutralising his threatening (in many ways) past and defining his happy ending as becoming Emma 2.0: Storybrooke deputy.
With Emma, it’s less striking, because it’s Killian that’s assimilating
to her world, but it’s there, too, but more subtly? Emma whose points of pride
are her ability to find people and to read people having those things
neutralised to allow for plot to move forward in a suitably dramatic fashion (see: not reading Killian at all and not looking for him when he was missing)?
That rankles me, but that’s not really an answer, I don’t
think. Why does that rankle me? Why
do I feel so bone-deep that these things that I see being swallowed by the
narration are something that the characters hold as dear as I do? Maybe they’re
OK letting these things go as they evolve into their new lives happily ever
But that’s the thing. That’s the reason why. I just posted
this bit earlier because it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks: the reason why the “happy
ending” we’re getting for these characters feels strange and ill-fitting to me,
is because I’m trying to define their happy endings by what I’ve actually seen
them happy about on the show, not just what makes them not sad/stressed/angry, and I’m not seeing those very, very, few things reflected at all in what we’re getting.
I think one of the problem this show has, is that
it doesn’t really do a great job of establishing sources of joy for its main characters.
Supporting characters are often given a passion that exists as the key to
solving a dilemma: Merida has her archery, Ariel has her collections, and even
though she’s more than a bit role, Belle has her books. Hell, Henry has his
music, movies and writing, and Regina has her horses. We’ve seen these characters light up like Christmas trees when talking about these things. I can picture
Ariel as a museum curator in a heartbeat because I know that tending a collection is something that
makes her little merheart sing (free AU prompt! Omg come on that would be
So what is it for Emma and Killian? When do we see them
excited and happy about things? When do they describe their pleasure?
Not fucking much, tbh.
(haha my long winded ass continues below the cut!)
Can a mortal ask questions which God finds unanswerable? Quite easily I should think. All nonsense questions are unanswerable. How many hours are there in a mile? Is yellow square or round? Probably half the questions we ask—half our great theological and metaphysical problems—are like that.
Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything.
But no, that is not quite accurate. There is one place where her absence comes locally home to me, and it is a place I can’t avoid. I mean my own body. It had such a different importance while it was the body of H.’s lover. Now it’s like an empty house.
Meanwhile, where is God? This is one of the most disquieting symptoms. When you are happy, so happy that you have no sense of needing Him, so happy that you are tempted to feel His claims upon you as an interruption, if you remember yourself and turn to Him with gratitude and praise, you will be - or so it feels - welcomed with open arms. But go to Him when your need is desperate, when all other help is vain, and what do you find? A door slammed in your face and a sound of bolting and double-bolting on the inside. After that, silence. You may was well turn away. The longer you wait, the more emphatic the silence will become. There are no lights in the windows. It might be an empty house. Was it ever inhabited? It seemed so once. And that seeming was as strong as this. What can this mean? Why is He so present a commander in our times of prosperity and so very absent a help in time of trouble?
Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not ‘So there’s no God after all,’ but 'So this is what God’s really like. Deceive yourself no longer.’
C.S. Lewis - A Grief Observed
It is really comforting to me in times of distress to know that the greatest minds in Theology, the people who you would assume, more than anyone else, had their acts together and their lives figured out, still had major doubts and struggles. They still ran and fought with God many times. And, as seen above, some of those struggles were really serious. Not silly, simple doubts, but real questions and frustrations. I guess its just comforting for me to understand that I’m not alone when I feel that way. Some of the greatest of our kind walked these roads before me.
Lewis, in the next few chapters of what is one of my all-time favorite books, dealt with and answered all of these struggles. But I haven’t gotten there yet: either in my re-reading or in my life as I am tonight.
I’m kind of surprised how often Regina is the villain in AU CS fics. I feel like Regina in Evil Queen form is Snowing villain. She’s usually opposed to them.
Rumple seems like more of a CS obstacle to me. He’s much more opposed to Killian. (And has done wildly shady things to Emma).
Regina was opposed to Emma in S1,S2, sure, but since those were the seasons where Killian was also on the ‘villain side’ I’m surprised there’s not more Regina and Emma friendship in CS fics, since Regina and Killian have redeemed themselves on a similar timeline.
I think one of the things I love most about Captain Swan is how physically affectionate they are?
It’s honestly pretty rare even with canon pairings to get this much in the way of physical contact especially once a couple is established as “a couple”.
Generally once you reach couple status on a show physical affection is delegated to high stakes dramatic moments or moments specifically designated to be meaningful romantically (i.e. dates, weddings, sexual encounters etc).
I’ve been shipping in one way or another since I was old enough to consume media, and it might come down to what I’ve shipped in the past, but I can’t remember a couple that was so tactile and demonstrative?
It is extra significant considering they are the two most emotionally closed off people on the show yet they are very open and free with their affection.
I think this is a blend of the writing specifically calling for it, and also the acting choices made by Jen and Colin.
Either way I love it and I am grateful for it and I just wanted to express reason # 1,267 why this is the OTP to end all OTPs.
But just look at Killian feeling so at home in Charmings’ apartment. I mean, I can manage quite well in my friend’s kitchen, but I don’t have the slightest idea where she keeps her portable heater (I’m not even sure where mine is at this precise moment). It seems as if someone (wink wink) has been spending some time in Charmings’ household. I wouldn’t even be surprised if David or/and Emma has taken it upon themselves to introduce our pirate to modern technology (knowing that he already has a phone and is able to use it). This simply warms my heart :)
No one ever told me that grief felt so much like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing