So apparently there was a rumor a while back that cr1tikal works as a substitute teacher.

Could you imagine just sitting in class, waiting for your teacher, when all of a sudden you hear

“What’s up everybody it’s Cr1tikal. Today I’m substituting Applied Chemistry, let’s do this shit,”

anonymous asked:

There is this really funny undertale animation called "fun time at grillbys" and it's from a critical video and it fits sans so well it's scary and hilarious

i do seriously love this video hahaha. it fits sans very well imho

edit: idfk why the html embedding isn’t working because it shows up in preview and when i go to edit the post but for some reason it won’t do it when i publish. extremely annoying. if someone could teach me how the heck to embed vids i’d be really happy

permalink to the video:

Your fave is problematic: cr1tikal

-wears basketball shorts 24/7
-always has earbuds around his neck
-his voice is too deep
-almost never laughs
-like wtf is up w/ that man, let us hear ur beautiful laughter
-is too handsome for mortals to comprehend
-doesn’t sing enough 90’s songs

anonymous asked:

You said awhile ago that critical was your voice for sans right? Well I just rewatched his Bad Flirt video and thought of sans telling the story and IM LOSING MY SHIT

oh my god. Bad Flirt is one of my all time favorite critikal videos. It’s fucking hilarious. imagining sans telling this story is amazing. 

here’s the video for anyone who wants to listen to the whole thing but there are the highlights:

“god forbid a girl ever make the mistake of starting a conversation with me. they’d soon find out that i was fundamentally fluent in affasia. the shit coming out of my mouth was just unintelligible. it was just downright disrespectful to humanity how bad i was at flirting.”

“the moon, tucked away behind the clouds as if trying to cover its eyes and shield itself from the awkwardness that was about to unfold at this little bar.”

“the odds were stacked against her because she was trying to wingman a sinking ship of social skills”

“the weatherman may have predicted cloudy with a chance of humidity, but what he couldn’t have predicted, what no one could predict, was the storm of awkwardness that was about to befall the area.”

“we make it to the table. small talk begins. names are exchanged. i instantly forget both their names, but i remember how i introduced myself to them. i extended my hand for a handshake like i’m conducting a fucking business meeting. oh yes ladies, i’ll need the stock reports on my desk 8am sharp. but the worst part about this exchange is that when they oblige my handshake, i KUNG-FU grip ‘em! i grabbed their hands hard as shit!”

“i was pushing too much awkwardness right from the get-go”

“she was working under the assumption that i am NOT a bumbling goober and can handle a one-on-one conversation with the other girl. rookie mistake, i absolutely could not handle that in any capacity.”

“she got so bored and was putting the kabosh on it. she said ‘look i’ve had a shit week and i just wanna go home with a guy tonight, okay?’ and then she puts her hand on my hand.”

“i looked her in the eyes. we locked eyes. and i said to her. ‘well you’re gonna have to hurry up because the bar’s clearing out. i wish you the best of luck finding a guy but if you don’t find one i’ll eat your pussy a little if you want.”

“for me, this was proof that whatever higher power or creator exists they truly don’t care about this world.  because if they did they would have sent a fucking wild ice cream truck to take me out right then and there.”

“every emotion a human is capable of feeling, she felt in that moment. and then she pretended to get a phone call so she’d have an excuse to leave. and that makes her a good person in my book because what she should have done is say ‘hey get the fuck away from me you creepy humunculous’ or something to that effect because that’s what i deserved.”

anonymous asked:

I thought critikalz (penguinz0) was amazing but then he started defending Notch on twitter just because he donated money to charity and then my heart literally broke. Notch was the guy who said "if you think straight pride shouldn't exist you deserve a bullet in the head". Notch is rich and can just write off that donation on his taxes.

ugh, Notch

i try to disassociate creators from what they create, but ngl Notch has put me right off Minecraft