cries uglily

Things that happened at Mama 2016:

*Taejin (better than FSOG)
*NAMJIN (I’m a sucker for this ship)
*Yoonmin (we all know bout these two)
*EXOxBTS(them hugging made me smile so wide! Like ya’ll need to stop the fanwars *insert annoyed face*)
*SEVENTEENxMONSTAX (wonho was adorably hugging mingyu like what’s cuter than that)
*EVERYONE HUGGING AND CONGRATULATING ONE ANOTHER WHICH SHOWS us that no wars between fandom should happen like look at their interactions
* also Jeon and yugyeom *cries uglily*
*CRUSH WON

Let’s look forward to 2017 everyone :)

I let you fall out of love with me.
I sat there and cried uglily about things that couldn’t be changed and about parts of me I sought to tear out of my own skin.
I sat there and turned the world around me ugly so that you could look even more beautiful. Myself, included.
I sat there and tore myself apart and put it together, over and over again. It was addictive; I watched you watch me, hiding all these pieces of me I hated, and rearranging them over and over again, until you knew which pieces hid what and how deep they went.
I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t have to. Why would I?
It never fails to hurt to make myself more real, because more real means more pain, and more pain means more real.
But I did it anyway.
I let you fall out of love with me because I was hoping you wouldn’t.
But you did.
—  disappointment cuts through flesh like a rusty blade - Alexandra Hadley