oh man do I used to hate myself for my orientation. realising I was ace was kinda okay (most people like sex and I don't but it was /shrug) but I was in denial about being aro for so long. I thought I was going to end up alone because besides being aroace I'm not an interesting person and I kinda suck at friendships. I told a friend about this (i was in a bad place) and he was so understanding and told me i deserved the kind of life and relationships i wanted, i cried an entire ocean tbh
Yea I thought I was ace for a while bc of my repulsion that comes and goes and that didn’t make me happy but I learned to accept it (until I realized the truth,) but it took me forever to accept being aro. I internalized shit so badly I even looked at aro people and was like “man I feel so sorry for them, that must suck.” And when I couldn’t deny it anymore I cried and cried and I hated myself. I had a lot of internalized shit to deal with.