creepy stalker shit

September ‘15. a very long list of coffee shop aus I’ve read. my bootleg rec page can’t really be considered a bootleg rec page without coffee shop aus. 

* = fics that could use lots more love and appreciation! 

Love how idiotic these two are in this. And the Sheriff<33:  

All Stirred Up by jsea, marguerite_26 (13/13 | 49,430 | Explicit)

Derek’s first duty as a new deputy is the early morning coffee run to The Leaky Carafe, and it’s not long before he discovers that the quirky barista has a knack for making the perfect drink. Every time. Even before you order.

But is it intuition, luck or magic that has all Stiles’ customers leaving happy?

Not even coffee, but so perfect!: 

be my dar(jee)ling by takeittothestars (2/2 | 5,393 | Mature)

‘You alright there? Need any help?’ someone from behind him says, and Derek startles badly from where he’s been judging the tea (Cardamom with ginger for Sherlock Holmes? And almonds for Jack Harkness? Really?). The person laughs when he knocks over a few tins, and Derek knows that laugh. Sure enough, he looks up as he puts Moriartea back on the shelf and it’s Stiles fucking Stilinski, #24 on the lacrosse team and captain of Derek’s heart since he dropped Cora off at a game once, the cutest, hottest thing on the planet since – since – since ever, if Derek’s honest with himself.

-A tea shop AU in which Derek is an editor, Stiles works in a tea shop, both are dumb, and there is tea. For this prompt

LOL!: 

Your Sass Is All the Syrup I Need by broadcastdelay (1/1 | 8,906 | Teen)

Derek is a grumpy hipster barista (in Portland, the natural home of his kind). Stiles develops a taste for such things.

This is so great!! Totally underrated! Deserves all the lovee<3333 :

*Large Black Coffee, To Go by sunnydalewerewolf (1/1 | 5,183 | Mature)

Derek is Stiles’ favorite actor, Stiles works in a coffee shop frequented by Laura, and everyone is kind of an asshole.

Also deserves a ton of love!! So cute!!: 

*All Hale Pastries by NikaNielson (1/1 | 1,622 | Teen) 

After Cora drops out of a cooking competition at the last minute, Stiles tries to convince Derek to take her place.

I’m always a slut for tattooed and pierced up Stiles and that sequel tho!:

Queer Your Coffee by alisvolatpropiis (1/1 | 3,084 | NR)

Derek’s just over the city line when he sees a sign for an independent drive-thru place, Full Spectrum Brew. There are three cars in line when he turns in, which annoys him but gives him hope. Not that he really trusts the people of Beacon Hills to have much taste when it comes to coffee (god, he is a snob), but the shop’s popularity does seem to bode well. The line of cars moves way more slowly than he’d like, each customer in front of him seeming to take way too long to order, and then lingering when they get their coffee. He’s irritable from lack of sleep and an even more detrimental lack of caffeine, anxious to get out of the car. Finally it’s his turn and he slowly rolls up to the window, turning the radio down.

For a second, he thinks he must have fallen asleep while he was waiting, because what he sees when he looks in the window surely must be a dream.

Stunning brown eyes like glowing honey and sweet little nose, slightly upturned; a shapely pink mouth, bottom-lip pierced by a thin black hoop that he’s worrying with the tip of his tongue as he smiles a gorgeous hello.

He’s the most beautiful man Derek’s ever seen.

And he’s shirtless.

Melting into a puddle of cute:

expresso yourself by wearing_tearing (1/1 | 3,149 | Teen)

Derek can say he ever expected something like this to happen when he agreed to work at Expresso Yourself, his family’s coffee shop.

And by that he means he never expected Hollywood’s new favorite actor, Stiles Stilinski, to burst through his doors at seven-thirty in the morning, wide-eyed and scared, with the collar of his shirt ripped off.

Haha!!:

Red Lights Already Off by KuriKuri (1/1 | 3,375 | Teen)

Stiles isn’t a hooker. He just plays one on TV.

The CUTEST: 

*Love is a Sneeze Away by mandysimo13 (1/1 | 1,833 | NR) 

Stiles is allergic to dogs. Bad news for doggy day care employee, Derek Hale.

Fluffy as hell!:

*Name for the Order? by katnisskirk (1/1 | 2,456 | NR)

AU. Stiles is a barista and Derek is a customer who regularly comes in while talking on the phone so Stiles repeatedly (intentionally) mishears his name.

Priceless:

The Customer Ain’t Always Right by trilliath (1/1 | 2,273 | Gen.)

Today’s the day. He’s gonna do it. He’s actually going to (as Cora says) “speak words like a normal human and talk” to (as Cora has designated him) Cute Coffee Boy.
- Or he would, if it weren’t for this asshole cutting in line.

Amazing!!<33: 

*HMMARCW by elumish (1/1 | 6,242 | Teen) 

“My student thinks that all werewolves have to turn on the full moon. That we debunked seventy-five years ago. What the hell is he doing, living with his head in a bucket of bees?”

It looks like werewolf-dude’s mouth twitches. “It’s probably difficult to write an essay with your head in a bucket of bees.”

Glorious:

Freebies by Saucery (1/1 | 1,215 | Teen)

Stiles can’t figure out why people keep dropping, spilling or breaking things in his presence. And offering him free stuff. Like, what the heck?

Silly Dorks:

*i’m constantly on the cusp of trying to kiss you by trilliastra (1/1 | 4,044 | Teen)

-
In which Derek is a writer and has a crush on Stiles, they talk about skydiving and getting tattoos, and Laura Hale is awesome.

Sooo cutee:

Now You’re Too Sweet by agent_izhyper (1/1 | 6,648 | Gen.)

In which Stiles is thoroughly confused and awkwardly misinterprets the situation, and has fallen in love with Derek’s heavenly baked goods before he even knew (let alone fell for) Derek Hale. Also, first meetings are a mess and the universe hates him, but nothing new there, right?

Awkward cuteness: 

*Sexy as Charged by inkblott (1/1 | 6,293 | Teen) 

If you asked Stiles what he planned on doing with his life, failing so epically hard was not one of them. And okay, you could argue, that his life was kind of a fail. Being the only 19 year old virgin that he knew was a bummer sometimes, but you’d never notice unless you asked.

Totally.

He has no idea how it’s managed to get to this point in time, and he really fucking regrets getting out of bed this morning. I mean, he didn’t even have class, which was a once in a blue moon kind of thing, but he still thought, “Hey, it’s a nice morning, I’m not dead, the sun is shining, I might as well get some coffee.” What. An. Idiot.

Well. It wasn’t an altogether bad day. There were definitely some high points.

GAH!! dying cuz sooo adorableee and fluffy!!!!:

Not Exactly My Cup of Coffee by officerstilinskihale (1/1 | 4,610 | Teen)

Stiles buried his face in his hands and resisted the urge to scream.

The angry sex he wasn’t having with Derek would be so good.

Not the typical cutesy coffee shop au. Angsty, hot, and Derek is so so grumpy:

Double Negatives by coffeeinallcaps (1/1 | 16,337 | Explicit)

Derek and Laura run a pure food store and coffeehouse. There’s this boy Stiles who’s a regular customer. He’s infuriating, of course, but there’s something about him.

Keep reading

But am I the only one who noticed Nathan had one of Max's selfies pasted on his wall? LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! That shit was creepy as fuck, like Max was so chill about it going on 'oh he stole one of my selfies, what a bastard' and I was like hello a possible serial killer and rapist has a picture of you in his room and you don't at least wonder why the fuck he has it??!!
Man fuck these fanfics shading bébé Luke extra hard

For real, he tied her up and tried to rape her and shit? That’s some of the grossest mischaracterization I have ever seen. Luke has only got flip with Ichabod and checked into his credentials because he’s a detective and Ichabod was a murder suspect. that’s what a good detective would do. Stop making him a creepy crazy angry stalker and shit. That’s Andy’s job.

The story was crap anyway. Bad writing, bad. 

I just… seriously, who even was using mocking penis size as a standard operating procedure with “problematic trans men”????

The only time I ever saw it was when a bunch of trans guys were literally 100% stalking multiple trans women. Like sending creepy asks, hatefollowing, reblogging personal posts, degendering, misgendering, engaging in all sorts of bro violence.

That’s not “problematic” that’s creepy abusive stalker shit and I really can’t fault anyone who went after their dick size to keep them off them. Stalkers are the kind of people who require heavier responses. Stalkers are where things like death wishing, genital mockery, even doxxing becomes viable because they will not stop and no one will stop them.

What do you expect the victims to do? Leave the net? Lmao.