Prepare your tears and nappies, time for a kids Headcanons!
52. Dipper would be called Papa, Bill is Daddy and Mabel is Goddess of Fun and Destruction, she also accepts Auntie Maby. Great Grunkle Stan, Uncle Soos, Auntie Red (Bill made the kids call her that)
53. Bill loves kids but hasn’t a single idea how to take care of them, comfort them, show them right or wrong, so Dipper teaches him. Bill still calls for Dipper when he gets scared he’ll fuck up with a diaper or tying a shoe.
54. Dipper sings the best lullabies. Bill provides backup Acapella with a demon version of the lullaby and makes them even better.
55. Dipper is a worry wort, always making Bill go after the kids if they go to explore the woods or into town. Or maybe he rather not have people realize that two guys have kids and one of the parents is actually a demon.
56. If Bill SOMEHOW got Dipper pregnant, Dipper would make sure he never lived it down. Even after the kid/s are born.
“Oh, you think changing diapers is bad? IMAGINE HAVING A PARASITE IN YOUR BODY FOR NINE MONTHS WHEN YOURE NOT MEANT TO. ”
57. With enough focus on their partner, male (or turned male) demons can impregnant anyone/anything. Even if their partner is the same gender. Without doing so intentionally, of course.
58. If Bill and Dipper adopted, Bill would spend months showering the globe for the perfect baby that can handle magic. If he’s gonna adopt a baby, it better damn can use magic like their parents. Dipper would be happy with whatever.
59. Dipper was never really fond of kids growing up, as they were kinda a bunch of assholes to him. But when he got his own kid, he loved that kid way too much. Like, way too much. Like this was HIS baby.
60. Dipper may act like an uncaring parent but he’s really not. He’ll still get teary-eyed if his baby gets hurt, even if they’re teenagers.
61. Bill loves teaching the kids magic. Dipper doesn’t approve and gets angry whenever Bill wakes up the magic in them too early when they agreed to wake it up when they were twelve (like Dipper) Bill got so proud when the first spurt of magic started coming out and his babies were floating in the air. Dipper was more horrified but still a little proud but he didn’t say anything.
62. Dipper didn’t have one kid, or twins. He had triplets. He despises Bill for it, especially after the surgery. He has a huge scar across his stomach from it but it was mostly faded when the triplets became proper teenagers.
63. Doesn’t matter if the babies are genetic or adopted or Bill made them. They are going to have some problems and a weird curiosity for dead things or killing animals. And deer teeth.
64. Mabel one time told Dipper that he complains so much about having the kids, it’s like he didn’t want them. Dipper, offended by it, explains that it wasn’t that he didn’t want to have them, it’s that he wasnt ready to have kids yet, and when he found out and was actually terrified of not being a good parent.
65. The kids are the devils. They bring home dead things and ask Dipper to skin it and make dinner out of it. Dipper has grown so accustomed to it that when the kids brought home a dead deer for thanksgiving, he forget his parents weren’t use to it and they flipped out. Bill loves it when the kids bring home stuff and makes them take out the teeth or little things to remember each of their kills. When they had too much, the kids showed their creative side and made trinkets out of them.
66. Dipper has given up on trying to stop Bill from encouraging the kids in doing bad things. As long as they don’t hurt people or damage any property/the shack, he’s fine with it.
67. The kids aren’t scared of Bill at all. Even when he’s really angry with them. However, when he threatens to get Dipper do they cower in fear. Dipper is a hard parent to please and if you disappoint him, he can be a very dangerous one.
68. Dipper alone is very creative with his punishments on the children. From doing chores to getting something semi-dangerous from the woods to odd places to sit in time out, Dipper is a feared parent, especially since he knows exactly what the kids love and know ways to take it from them if they become bad. If Bill is in on it, the kids are certain they will never do their bad thing again.
69. Bill is like the cool dad who lets the kids do anything they want so long as they don’t upset or disobey his Pine tree. He’s also very protective and if anyone gets in the way of his kids enjoying themselves, he’s gonna step in and smack a hoe.
70. Bill teaches the kids different languages at a young age. Dipper has allowed this as long as it’s languages he knows. It includes: Latin, Japanese, Chinese, and Egyptian. Dipper also knows French and Spanish but he’s told Bill not to teach them that so he can freely curse at him in those languages.
71. If Dipper hears his kids cursing, they’re going to be sitting in a corner with soap in their mouth and a red bottom. Afterwards, they have to do dishes for the rest of the day and get sent to bed early until they apologize to whoever they cursed at. And they have to mean it.
72. Dipper studies online after moving to Gravity Falls. His kids like to join his lessons and Bill answers all the questions from all of them. Bill isn’t a bad teacher but Dipper would prefer it if he wouldn’t give them such vivid details of the holocaust yet. At least wait until they’re out of their elementary stage and in middle school.
73. One/two of the kids have Mabel’s creativity mixed with Bill’s fascination with dead things. They make so many trinkets out of bones, out of animals skins that Dipper is still horrified whenever they’re actually wearing it sometimes. He does a bone/teeth/fangs bracelet that he wears though. He has to, the kid made it for him.
74. All the kids have weird signs. One kid has the Apollo sign, another is an olive branch, another is a moon. One of these brats have a pinecone as a sign though.
75. The kids have weird names.
76. There is at least one girl and she does get taller than the boys by the time she’s 13. Dipper glares at Mabel whenever it’s brought up.
77. Mabel is the best baby sitter and is pretty much the only capable of taking care of them.
78. The born kids have a few demon characteristics, or at least not normal ones. One has long black claws, another may have a tail, another may have nubby or really big horns. All of them have abnormally sharp teeth though.
79. One of the kids seems to have a connection to Tapestry Bill. Bill isn’t sure how that came to be but believes it’s because it’s one of his forms, and therefore Tapestry Bill wanted a kid too. Dipper isn’t sure how to feel about that.
80. After three/four kids Dipper has made it clear that he does not want to get pregnant/adopt/help make anymore kids. He’s willing to babysit but there’s no way in hell he can handle having another kid. Bill is a little disappointed but plans on changing Dipper’s mind eventually. Eventually. Maybe after the current children are out of the house.
Prompt: Aurora gets her heart broken by Philip and Maleficent comforts her. Bonus points if Maleficent wants to destroy Philip and Aurora has to convince her not to.
Hi. I’m sorry. I’m beginning to think I’m completely incapable of writing Malora without angst. I’m also definitely incapable of writing anything short. Ah well. I hope you enjoy a healthy dose of angst with your fluffy Malora moments because that’s what you’re getting. This is probably only the first part of something longer.
Title: A Different Sort of Love
Length: 4000 words
Summary: Even if Aurora knows she should be happy with Phillip, he isn’t quite the man of her dreams. Without Maleficent by her side, she tries her best to love him, but trust is a fragile thing.