People are people and things change yeah I’ve read that a million times but I never thought you would be one of them. I didn’t dream up a scenario where I lose you. I wasn’t holding my breath waiting for you to walk away but you did anyway and it hurts like hell. Losing you hurts like hell.
I sat waiting, praying for the time to go back instead of forward.
I looked at my wrists and remembered just how feeble I felt inside.
I just wanted to leave behind all the stains you left on me.
So I walked hoping to get as far away from this town as possible.
I ran and with each step I tried to pretend I was leaving everything behind, as if in a few steps I’d be in a new world with a new life.
The air burnt my lungs and I sat on the cold hard ground, imagining that this is how my heart must feel.
I cried, not one of those sobs where your entire body shakes and your head hurts and your chest feels like its caving in.
It was a soft silent cry and I knew in that moment that the old me was dead and gone
Lost somewhere in the wind and now here I was dead, empty and cold.
lately i’ve started to dive head first into novels plunging into fictions and romances as if they were my own
lately i’ve been yearning for foreign lands soaking in colourful pictures of faraway places dreaming of the day i get to walk among them
lately i’ve been drinking conversations over cups of coffee listening from the table far away catching glimpses of unknown lives that feel familiar all the same
lately i’ve indulged in yoga practicing the art of zen stretching limbs like tree branches gently swaying peaceful
lately i’ve been searching for myself in pockets of the world that i never would have thought to look finding little bits and pieces scattered amongst a favourite tune, the scent of summer, the comforting warmth of the setting sun
lately i’ve spent a little bit of extra time falling in love with myself for a change and i couldn’t be happier