Me:*Reading a funny fanfic about one of my gay OTPs and trying to keep a calm, normal face*
My mom: Hey honey, do you want sthg to drink? Milk, maybe?
Me:*Bursts out of laughter because of the fanfic and the milk at the same time.* N-no, th-thanks! *Laughs even harder* *Shouts out loud* PETE! *Ends by stuffing my entire fist into my mouth to stop laughing*
My mom: Oh my god. My daughter’s crazy. I have to call a shrink.
Me:*Is suddenly very calm, but screaming inside* I went to a shrink, to analize my dreams!
Thank you for answering my ask! (Raw meat anon here) I was wondering how the UT/UF/SF skelebros + US Papyrus, react to their S/O spiking the skele's food with the ghost chili pepper? And how would the skeles get revenge?
You are very welcome!
Sans: You swear you see him pause, just for a moment, when he takes the first sip of his ketchup, but the moment passes and he gives you that ever-present smile. Dammit! Though maybe it makes sense, he drinks ketchup like water. Maybe his sense of taste is messed up, or he just doesn’t have one…. But the second you’re gone he’s chugging milk like crazy. Holy shit! Heh, ok, you’re asking for it.
After he hid his reaction to the ghost pepper so well you were left defenseless to retaliation. Biting into your sandwich you didn’t see the sudden burst of intense heat coming. And right there, usual smile just a little bit higher, is Sans leaning against the counter as you pull out anything you can get your hands on to drink and get that taste out. “what is it babe, it looks like you’ve seen a ghost.’
“YES!! IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE MY MOUTH IS BURNING WITH THE INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND SUNS!
THIS IS ONE HILARIOUS JAPE! I CAN TAKE A JOKE!”
And he gets his revenge. Ooooh, yes. Later he treats you to a meal, some delicious spicy buffalo wings! But surprise!! You take a bite and it is… sweet? “NYEHEHE! YOU HAVE FALLEN FOR MY PLOY SEAMLESSLY! FOR YOU SEE, THOSE ARE RICE CRISPY TREATS WHICH I DYED RED WITH BROWN SUGAR, FOOD COLORING, AND A TANGERINE GLAZE, THEN MOLDED INTO A HIGHLY MISLEADING SHAPE! YOU WERE EXPECTING SPICY, AND INSTEAD GOT SWEET!!!” Papyrus is such a good noodle.
Red: He tries to play it cool like Sans, but after only a couple of seconds his blank face cracks. He can’t fucking do this, turns the faucet on, and starts guzzling down water. ‘har har, i’m glad you had your fun, now hand me the milk. jesus what did you put in there, an actual flame? is tori in on this or somethin?’
Then a week later you bite into a doughnut, the only one left in the box. Immediately you spit out the mouthful you took of what you thought was going to be a delicious treat. Because instead of cream filling is… is that toothpaste and mayonnaise? What kind of sick bastard.. Red cackles from behind you, phone in hand capturing this beautiful moment of revenge. Oh. That kind.
Edge: “YOU SULLY MY NAME AND MY MOUTH!!” Edge it’s just- “
“AND NOW YOU SULLY MY EARS WITH YOUR- YOUR- TRAITOROUS LIES!! POISONED BY MY OWN LOVER.“ You don’t have ears. “THAT IS INCONSEQUENTIAL!!” Do you want something to drink. “YES PLEASE THAT WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED!!”
There is a small, unassuming cupcake on the table. Edge isn’t being subtle about this at all, you can see him peaking out at you, waiting for you to fall prey to his retaliation. Well, better see what it is. You reach for the cupcake, wondering what might be on or in it…. but before you can touch it you’re suddenly a couple feet higher and upside down, hanging inside of a net. “LET THIS TEACH A LESSON TO YOU HUMAN! DO NOT THINK TO JAPE ME, I AM THE MASTER OF ALL TRICKS! TWO LESSONS! YOU MUST BE VIGILANT FOR TRAPS, EVEN IN A HOUSEHOLD SETTING! CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!”
Honey: His reaction is pretty mild, he actually likes spicy food. He calmly walks over and grabs a cup of milk, nursing it to quell the heat, and smirks at you. “nice try hun, but you’re gonna have to try harder than that.’ He always is hard to prank.
His retaliation is small and simple: he pulls you into a spicy kiss, that incredibly skilled tongue of his making sure your mouth tingles just as much as his does one way or another.
Black: He freezes, expression frozen in shock, and spits out his mouthful. “HOW DARE YOU!! YOU PRESUME TO JAPE ME!” He guzzles some milk real quick, just enough to kill the fire’s edge a bit, and advances on you before you can run away. The contaminated food is pressed to your mouth. “TASTE YOUR OWN MEDICINE, HUMAN! EAT! IT! NO HUMAN YOU CANNOT ESCAPE, YOU WILL GATHER THE CROP TO THE SEEDS YOU HAVE SOWN HERE TODAY!!” Either you take your punishment or he force feeds you.
Puppy: ‘oh babe, this is great! thanks!’ He likes it. This guy is unreal, and your plan is foiled. Drat! But… it’s totally worth it for the dopey happy look he gives you, and the request for more. No retaliation, just a little hug from a very grateful Puppy.
Okay y'all wanna hear a story?
So one day in a chill Friday night I’m on the courtship squad server on vc with tays milk and so it’s pretty silent and then my brother asks if he can use my computer so I say
“No I’m using it right now”
So he starts getting mad but I ignore it. He’s like this all the time.
Soon he starts going crazy, and tays milk is giggling at him.
He even cries like woah duder
And says “IM GOING TO KILL YOU”
THIS BOY IS 6 YEARS OLD
Then oh THEN
He says “I I I WANNA WANNA WANNA PLAY PLAY PLAY THE THE THE COMPUTER COMPUTER FOR FIVE FIVE FIVE MINUTES MINUTES MINUTES”
And that’s how 555 became courtship squads signature number
•Like imagine him giving you his cute little smile every morning and the light is just right so he looks like an angel
•Or when you’re too busy doing stuff and he noticed you’re not eating so he legit a sits down right next to you and feeds you as you work
•But like imagine coming home to him sitting on your floor cutely while playing with a fluffy little puppy that was suppose to be your surprise but he got too excited and couldn’t help himself
•Imagine The8 trying to show off to you some cool tricks he learned but he accidentally fell and now you’re sitting on his lap and applying ice to a pouty Minghao
•So imagine The8 waking you up with kisses all over your face because you needed to wake up but you wouldn’t so he went to plan B. When you do finally wake up he gives you the most angelic smile ever and finally gives you a real kiss
•So imagine Minghao going to Joshua to get guitar lessons because he planned a surprise for you because he saw how hard you’re working and wanted to treat you to something special. Like he plays 21st century girls on the guitar for you and like it sounds perfect
•Imagine Minghao taking care of you when you’re sick and like he’s just running around like crazy getting you soup, milk and chocolate because you’re his special lil baby and he just wants to make you feel better
•Imagine being in the same class as Minghao and everyday he brings you a cup of bubble tea because he knows you work hard and probably hasn’t had anything to eat so he makes it his job to feed you and becomes best friends with you
•Imagine being on Law of the Jungle with The8 and wherever you go he’s always with you because you guys are secretly dating and he does all these little things for you like giving you an extra coconut or making sure you’re really warm at night and giving you the best spot to sleep