crazy harri

Right, so,

the fandom reactions to the “Two New Harry Potter Books!” headlines are making my head ache. I think one of the worst things about the internet is that it provides news to people who don’t really read, so a bunch of people are skimming the headlines but not the actual articles. And then expressing opinions based on that. 

Seen on the internet

“Call me crazy, but Harry Potter books that aren’t written by JK Rowling just don’t do it for me. I’m not trying to buy some fan-fic.“

“So I know all the new Harry Potter books are a total money grab, but that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna immediately buy them all. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯“

They’re exhibition catalogs!  Honestly, I’m so deeply tired of HP fandom spreading misinformation because they don’t bother to fact check or even read beyond a news headlines. It’s pathetic.

youtube

(…)

Harry: (stop singing/yelling a song) Now… there are three things… theres…there’s more than three things that we love most about Canada. One…poutine! Two…poutine!! Three…wot

Liam: Protein!

Harry:  Three…no, poutine was one and two, this is number three. Number three is…P O U T I N E!!!!!! (crowd screams) Number four… (laughs) poutine! Number five, syrup. (yelling) NUMBER SIX SYRUP ON POUTINE!!! (screaming) Number seven and the one we love most of all, is every single one of you! Shhhh!!! Number eight, you and syrup on POUTINE! (screaming) That’s what I’m talkin’ about!!! 

Liam: You should… (something intelligible)

Harry: I really wanna mic drop, but I won’t, ‘cause they’re expensive.

Liam: Are you gonna run for president?

Harry: No! There’s not a chance, ‘cuz I don’t know what I’m talkin about! 

Liam: I still think you should, I’m convinced!

Harry: (screaming) Nine (looks at the flag) THIS FLAG, ON YOU, ON SYRUP, ON POUTINE!!!! MAKE SOME NOISE FOR CANADA!!!

Liam: You’ve gotta have a ten, you’ve gone through nine now you’ve gotta have a ten!

Harry : (scream)TEN! 

Liam: Ten! Us on syrup on poutine on… (gets lost) something else

Harry: Ten is (pick the moose on the floor) THIS MOOSE, ON THIS FLAG, ON YOU, ON SYRUP, ON POUTINE!!! Make some noise for the moose! (screaming to a fan) Which one d’you want, the moose or the flag or the syrup?  

Liam: Or the poutine?

Harry: Or the poutine? You can have the moose and the flag. (throws the moose and the flag to a fan) Ohhhh I’m hyped. Oooh I’m hyped. (start to do some weird moves)

Liam: (says someting intelligible to Harry)

*Harry and Liam start to dance and hum Rocky theme song*

Niall: tell em you’re gonna be president

Harry: (screaming, out of his mind) ROCKY!!! On the moose, riding on the moose, into this place on the moose, this is Rocky, he’s on the moose, he’s on his back, wrapped in a flag, covered in poutine, on the syrup, there’s syrup everywhere!!!

Niall : (laughing)Harry!

Harry: There’s lots of syrup everywhere! Rocky waits, the moose is gone… (get lost) 

Niall: Michael Buble!

Louis: That is passion!

Harry :  MICHAEL BUBLE! (is confused) Michael Buble on the shoulders of Rocky, wrapped in a flag, on a moose, riding in here, covered in syrup, on poutine, and you’re all everywhere watching the whole bit go down. 

Liam : I’m confused

Harry:  It’s gone too far, I’ve confused myself… this is story of my life, please sing along.  xx

2

For the people who refuse to believe my airport manip is ACTUALLY a manip (yes, I’ve have people argue with me over it), here’s the base photo I used side by side LOL Harry did wear the “Women are smarter” t-shirt, we just only got two very blurry fan photos, so I took it upon myself to make an HQ. Sorry for the uproar and confusion it has caused in the fandom and media lol!!

Ice cream

Draco grunted as he fumbled with the collar of his dress shirt. His face was contorted in distaste as he felt little beads of sweat running down his neck. Ugh, disgusting! Potter had already pointed out that it was far too hot outside to be wearing a dress shirt, but Draco refused to wear the kind of sordid clothes Potter seemed to love so much. It suited him, of course, but Draco had a reputation to uphold.

That was a bit of a stupid reason, even Draco had to admit it, seeing as they were out and about in Muggle London, but Draco, unlike Potter, had class.

Them being friends was still very new to him and definitely needed some getting used to. Potter seemed already comfortable around Draco, always blabbering on about this and that, bumping Draco’s arm with his elbow, grinning at him mischievously…

Blaise had remarked that it very much seemed like he and Potter were dating, but that was just ridiculous. They had just met for coffee a few times, had gone to the movies (Potter’s idea of course and Draco was still a bit traumatised) and had gone for a few walks, like now. Yes, Draco had been a little surprised earlier when Potter had asked him if he wanted to come back to his place later for dinner, but that wasn’t out of the ordinary, was it? Friends did that… right?

As they continued walking down the street, Draco peered sideways and saw that Potter’s face was rather flushed and there were little beads of sweat running down his neck, too.

“Maybe we should have stayed inside today,” Potter wheezed. “I honestly don’t understand how you haven’t fainted yet.” He gazed at Draco’s shirt and his cloth trousers in discomfort.

“Well,” Draco began, eyeing Potter’s burgundy T-shirt and his short trouser, which reached to his knees, “I was taught elegance is a virtue, as well as endurance. Clearly, a concept which seems to be lost on you.” He let his eyes wander over Potter’s body and gave him an appraising look when their eyes met again. Potter seemed to stifle a giggle.

“What?” Draco snapped.

“Endurance,” Potter snorted. “Alright then.” He flashed Draco a toothy grin. Draco had no idea what was so funny about that, but didn’t get the chance to ask. Potter’s eyes had focused on something on the other side of the street. Draco turned around, but had no idea what had caught Potter’s attention.

“Wait here,” Potter told him and and sprinted off. Draco crossed his arms over his chest, huffing. What was Potter up to? And how dare he make Draco wait alone in the middle of the street like this?

Draco tapped his foot impatiently as the minutes passed by. When Potter finally came into view again, Draco saw that he was holding… two ice lollies?

“Here,” Potter said enthusiastically, holding one out to Draco. He gave it a quick glance and made a face.

“No thank you,” he grunted.

“What? Why?”

“I don’t like ice cream,” Draco shrugged. Potter’s eyes widened at that.

“What? How can you not like ice cream?” He sounded genuinely baffled.

“I just don’t.”

Potter kept staring at him, the incomprehension at Draco’s revelation clearly visible on his face.

“You’re dripping,” Draco noted with a raised eyebrow.

“What? Oh!” Only now did Potter seem to notice that the ice lollies were melting quickly, dripping all over his hands. He lifted one hand to his mouth and dragged his tongue over his knuckles slowly. Mesmerised, Draco watched as Potter did the same thing to his other hand.

“You sure you don’t want it?” Potter asked, oblivious to Draco’s sudden inner turmoil. Not trusting his voice at this moment, he just waved a dismissive hand in the air. Potter shrugged and lifted one of the ice lollies to his mouth.

Sweet Merlin!

Draco almost choked as Potter’s lips closed around the ice lollie. He pushed it deeper into his mouth and started sucking. Draco had to control himself not to clutch his chest in surprise. He winced when Potter made a slurping noise.

“You know,”  Potter said happily, “I had my first ice lolly when I was ten years old. I really like them.”

Draco had trouble concentrating on what Potter was saying, but still, a frown formed on his face.

“You hadn’t had ice cream before that?”

Potter shook his head and looked at the two ice lollies in his hands. They were both dripping like mad. He lifted one to his mouth again and licked it, painfully slow, from the bottom up, before sticking it in his mouth again. This time, he twirled it around, before releasing it again with a little ‘pop’.

Draco was sure he was about to faint. The heat wasn’t exactly helping, either.

“Potter,” he spluttered. He stepped forward and gazed at his mouth intently. “Ugh, you really are an imbecile, aren’t you?”

Potter’s mouth and his chin were smeared with the remnants of the ice lolly. Draco reached out and stroked the corner of Potter’s mouth with his thumb. He saw Potter’s adam’s apple bob as he swallowed.

“It’s sticky,” Draco muttered. He wasn’t really aware that he was leaning down, until his tongue made contact with Potter’s skin. Surprised by his own boldness, he quickly stepped back.

“I don’t know why I did that.”

Potter was flushed and he looked like he was trying to decide something.

“Sod that,” he suddenly muttered and let go of the two ice lollies. Before they hit the ground, Potter had his arms around Draco’s neck and their lips pressed together. Draco made a startled sound when Potter’s tongue pushed into his mouth. He tasted like artificial oranges. Yuck! But the things Potter apparently could do with that tongue…

“Let’s go back to my place,” Potter panted after a few moments. “Oh, but first, let me go back to that store real quick.”

Draco frowned.

“Why?”

“Because,” Potter said with one of his mischievous grins, “I want more ice cream.” He dropped his voice to a low, seductive whisper. “I want creamy, rich chocolate ice cream.” Draco shuddered at the way Potter was looking at him. “And I plan to lick it off your chest and out of your navel.”

This time, Draco really did choke. He recovered rather quickly, however, and grabbed Potter’s hand.

“Merlin, what are we waiting for?”

Apparently there’s a theory saying that Crookshanks was the Potters’ cat? So family selfie portrait time!