Garlicky Broccoli with Lemon and Lemon Flakes

Broccoli is the 9th most hated food in the US. And we fucking get it.

Americans (our fellow midwesterners in particular) do horrifying things to those little green trees. It’s always watery, underseasoned, and over cooked. And then, on top of the damp, grey blobs, we pour on plasticine cheese, and other sludgy atrocities to mask the decidedly sulphuric stench of our irresponsible cooking. The only way anyone seems to enjoy it is covered in Ranch. Which we also fucking get. But there’s gotta be a better way.

We’re tired of broc getting a bad rap and wholeheartedly believe that every vegetable has the capacity to be delicious if you handle it with care.

Just like other brassicas, Broccoli is best roasted. Steaming or boiling turns Broccoli into farty, soggy garbage, but a blast of dry heat can develop nutty flavor and crispy texture that bring tender, green florets into chips-and-dips levels of craveability.

We maximize that cruciferous crunch by massaging flavorful garlic oil into every nook and cranny of our broccoli. The even coating of oil helps transfer more heat from the air into the veggie for an almost deep-fried effect. We also take an extra crisp-surance policy in giving teach floret  elbow room on the cookie sheet. This makes sure moisture can evaporate from each floret (rather than hanging out and making shit soggy). A hit of lemon washes away any lingering sulphuric bitterness, making this recipe a perfect (re)introduction to even the pickiest eaters.

Garlicky Broccoli with Lemon and Pepper Flakes

  • 4 cloves Garlic
  • ¼ cup Olive Oil
  • 1 head Broccoli
  • A pinch (or more, you rebel) Red Pepper flakes
  • Salt and Black Pepper, to Taste
  • ¼ tsp (or more if you’re a rebel) Red Pepper Flakes
  • 1 ½ tsp Lemon Zest
  • 2-3 tbsp Lemon Juice

Peel and finely slice four cloves of Garlic. You can use your knife– but we like to use a mandolin or vegetable peeler for even, thin slices. Add the Garlic to a small pan with the Olive Oil and warm over low heat just until the Garlic starts to brown. It usually takes about three minutes. Remove the Garlic Slices, and let the Oil come to room temperature.

While the Oil cools, preheat your oven to 500°. Separate the Broccoli into florets with a paring knife. We like teeny, tiny Broccoli pieces; they get crispier and we can down them like popcorn.

Massage the (room temp, you dummy) Garlic Oil into the Broccoli and arrange on a foil or parchment lined baking sheet. Sprinkle with Salt, and pop into the oven. Roast for 15 minutes, until the Broc’s bright green, with crispy, brown, delicious, and  amazing.

Toss the still hot Broccoli with Black Pepper, Red Pepper, and Garlic Chips. Sprinkle with Lemon Zest and Juice, too, for a fragrant, acidic zing.


etsyfindoftheday | gift blitz 2015: bath & body stocking stuffers | 12.8.15

featured: the viaje clutch in indigo or shadow by scoutandcatalogue

the radical viaje clutch by scoutandcatalogue is available in two craveable colors — indigo or shadow. i love the hippielicious tie dye paired with a supple leather bottom, and the foldover style. it’s so cool, it can double as a clutch! roll this up and stuff it in MY stocking!!