silk | chapter fourteen

Originally posted by wonhoslilmonster

chapter song | masterpost 

ceo au - jimin x reader - angst | smut

word count : 6.1k

warnings : violence, adult themes

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I love the blue streaks and that now her hair is in one big braid and lots of little braids and all the beads and gemstones and S T U F F just IN THERE. Also Ashley said Pike has super long hair so I’m just gonna run with that to Timbuktu because long hair is LIFE.

I’m not super sold on her lil brooch design though so plz just Don’t Mind That I’ll probably change it later. 

I Don’t Forgive You | Part One

Originally posted by daeguboy

Current Part | Next Part

Pairing: Reader x Namjoon

Word Count: 1.5k

Genre: Angst

   → Synopis: After years of being together, a lie is uncovered that could potentially ruin your relationship with Namjoon forever.

There’s something that clings onto you whenever you love someone. It’s four letter word called hope. It sticks to you like gum against your favorite jeans when you unintentionally touch it from underneath a desk. No matter how hard you try to get it rid of it, it doesn’t come off. Hope doesn’t leave. But there comes a time when you just take a step back and let it be. There’s nothing more you can do to take it off.

I guess that was where the first problem came to be. We tried so hard to ignore the clear issue at hand like it was no problem and it slowly became to eat away at us, well at me. Then there were the the constant rumors of him being with other girls. I’d get insecure and barely speak to him, he’d get mad and start arguing. It was a cycle that we’d sadly gotten too familiar with and there wasn’t a way to fix it except exchange ‘I’m sorries’ and pretend like it never happened. But they did happen, and they did hurt me.

I continued to have that feeling at the very bottom of my gut though, that nasty though that he could possibly be … unfaithful. But I always pushed it aside thinking it was me being unreasonable. Namjoon was a hardworking guy with a stressful job that barely left him with time for his own. So whenever he came home, I never wanted to make a big fuss about how lonely I was feeling lately, or how just do something, anything since we hadn’t had any time together. I never thought he had the time to do such a thing since he barely even had time to be with me.

Then a picture arose.

It was probably one of the most cliche and careless ways of uncovering such a way of betrayal which was one of the reasons why I found herself denying it.

He isn’t like that. He would never do something like that especially after all this time and effort we put to be together.

Over and over I tried to convince herself the same things. I thought the way that the girl’s arms were wrapped around his neck while his were around her waist as their faces were centimeters from touching was a sick joke or maybe one of the edits that fans loved to make so much. I didn’t want to believe the wanting look Namjoon shared with the girl, the interest and possible love he had for someone that wasn’t me.

He promised me he wouldn’t. He told me he loved me too much to hurt me like that.

Does he?

It was only a matter of time before the truth finally surfaced. It was always there really, but I was always in denial mainly for my own sake.

Ten o’clock hit and I was finally snuggled into the warm sheets that Namjoon and I once shared. He usually called or would FaceTime just so could exchange our “I love you’s” and good nights before going to sleep, and in this case it was my turn. It was something we had grown accustomed to far before we had gotten into something serious. Yet the irritation grew within me as time passed, and he didn’t call. I was trying to be as understanding as possible, but lately he was sending short-answered text messages. Sometimes he wouldn’t even reply at all until hours later where he would apologize with an excuse that only made me roll my eyes from how ridiculous it sounded at this point. I wasn’t asking for a lot. I didn’t blow up his phone or make a big deal out of things because I both didn’t want to become that clingy, obnoxious girlfriend that suffocated her boyfriend, and I definitely didn’t want to bother him while he was working.

Babe I’m literally about to fall asleep 😩  we haven’t talked all day and I just want to say a quick goodnight

I waited ten agonizingly slow minutes waiting for a response, but there was none. Although he had read the message which only fueled my anger and irritation. In no time, I quickly clicked onto facetime and waited for him to answer. It was half past midnight here in Seoul meaning that it was somewhere past noon wherever he was considering the fact that he was in New York where they shared a thirteen hour time span.

“Finally.” I muttered to herself as he finally answered. “Namjoon why haven’t you-”

“Is there any reason that you’re calling my boyfriend?” A voice that was definitely not Namjoon’s asked rudely.

Did I just hear those words correctly? Did she just call my boyfriend hers while she naked under a sheet in his room and on his phone?

I couldn’t even talk as I tried to take in what had just happened. Had he really … what?

My phone blew up after that with messages and calls all from him. He wanted to explain what occurred only moments ago, but was there really an explanation for that? And she called him her boyfriend.

Oh God, this wasn’t some one time hookup.

I felt sick to my stomach, and my nerves turned into knots. My feet sprung into action and bolted towards the bathroom emptying all contents from my stomach.

He was talking to her for weeks, months maybe. Had he been talking to her the same amount time he was with me?

Three years; three years we spent together and for what? For it to just end like this? I gave him my everything. I told him every secret I had and opened up to him like I’ve never had with anyone else. He was my best friend, my other half. He was there for me when I moved here and didn’t so much as understand the language here.

The familiar rings from calls and messages echoed throughout the room as it sat vibrating beside me. By now, the rest of the boys joined along with Namjoon to spam it. Had they known about what Namjoon was doing? There was no doubt that they had. They weren’t just band mates but practically brothers who told each other everything.

“Hey are you-”

“Is it true?” I asked my voice breaking as I spoke. I hadn’t even realized I accepted the call, but at this point I didn’t care. “Is Namjoon …”

I couldn’t even finish the sentence. The reality of the situation was sinking in, and quite frankly I didn’t know how to handle it.

“I don’t think I should be the one answering that y/n.” Yoongi responded, but that answer was more than enough to confirm it all.

There were muffled voices in the background, and that’s when I heard him, Namjoon.

“Let me talk to her.”

“I don’t think that’s the greatest idea right now.”

“I need to talk to her Yoongi! She’s my girlfriend-”

It hurt too much to think about him let alone hear him. Nothing could justify his actions for him doing what he did, and I don’t think I could ever forgive him for it.

Please just talk to me

Just let me know you’re safe

I can’t lose you y/n

I’m sorry

The messages went on and on from him, but not once did I reply. And then I heard the front door open, and I just knew it was him. With every step that he took, I could my chest tightened, and it grew harder to breathe. My vision blurred with tears that I didn’t even bother to hold back anymore.

“Y/n . .” He trailed off as he stopped in his tracks once he entered the room. My attention was towards my fumbling hands as tears fell onto them. I couldn’t meet his eyes. It would break my already broken heart even more if I had.

“Why did you do this me?” I breathed out as I hiccuped a breath. And just like that, all my insecurities began to unravel. “Was I not good enough? Did I not make you happy?”

“What? No, no, no.” He breathed out as cupped my face in his hands. “It wasn’t - I don’t why I … I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry.”

A whimper left my lips, and I hated how pathetic and weak I sounded. But I was too hurt to feel anything else.

“I don’t forgive you.” I responded as I finally brought myself to look at him and pulled his hands away from my face. Tears welled his eyes as he shook his head. His breathing grew heavy and quickened a bit at the words that had just left my lips.

“Baby please, just don’t leave. We can fix this. I know we can.”

“I can’t trust you Namjoon.” I told him as I wiped my tears. “And trust is basically what makes up a relationship, so if I can’t trust you.”

“No y/n. No.” He shook his head, refusing to let me finish my sentence.

“Then we can’t be together.”