coxswain life

Person: All you ever do is crew. Do you even party?

Me: Hell yeah!! Its very exclusive–only about nine people are invited. We get together and get turnt on carbohydrates. Party so hard we all pass out. Then we get together the next day and party even harder on a super fancy and expensive boat with our matching outfits. No one parties like we do.

Person: Boat parties don’t fuckin count

Funny how whenever a crew does exceptionally well, a coxswain gets almost no credit, but when shit hits the fan, it must be the coxswain’s fault. A coxswain can make all the right calls, but if even one rower doesn’t follow through or lets up the power, it all goes to hell.

And yet we do a pretty thankless job anyways.