“Here’s a real question: how have you survived this long when you’re so violently self-destructive?”
Andrew cocked his head to one side in a question. Neil didn’t know if
Andrew was playing stupid to rile him or if Andrew really was oblivious.
Either way it was frustrating. He wondered why no one else had caught
on, or if people noticed and just didn’t care enough to say it. Now that
Neil saw it, though, he couldn’t look past it. Anytime the Foxes
mentioned Andrew’s upcoming sobriety or Andrew’s name popped up in
write-ups on the team’s performance at games, the focus was on what a
danger he was. People talked about his trial and how it saved them from
Andrew. No one said what they were doing to save Andrew from himself.
chapter one — neil josten let his cigarette burn to the filter without taking a drag. he didn’t want the nicotine; he wanted the acrid smoke that reminded him of his mother. if he inhaled slowly enough, he could almost taste the ghost of gasoline and fire. it was at once revolting and comforting, and it sent a sick shudder down his spine.
the most underrated part of the whole aftg trilogy is in tkm where aaron calls out neil for running from something/someone and then neil Roasts him which then transforms into andrew confessing to murder in front of the whole team all within like 2 pages why does no one talk about that it’s so iconic hit that mf like to spread the love of this scene
the strangled noise aaron made was his best attempt at andrew’s name. it was barely intelligible but it was enough.
andrew, who’d barely acknowledged aaron’s existence in the entire time neil had known them, looked immediately to his brother. andrew snaked a hand out from under the sheet and curled his fingers in a demand. aaron clambered onto the bed and reached for andrew.
“andrew,” aaron said, desperate and frightened. he held onto andrew like he thought andrew would disappear if he let go.
What she means:
in ACOMAF rhysand promised he would fuck feyre against the wall and then the next time they had sex it was definitely not against the wall which was fine but then in the 600+ pages in all of ACOWAR it literally never happened and I don't understand why SJM would do this to us I feel personally betrayed and let down and more than a little disgruntled
“Thea is watching from South tonight,” Kevin said, looking
to the elevated VIP box. It was too far away and too high up for Neil to make
out any faces, but there was a small crowd gathered at the windowed walls
already. Knowing the Court was here to watch them play sent a chill through
Neil’s veins. Kevin dragged his stare back to Wymack’s face and said, “and my
father comes to all of my games. That is enough.”
On Wymack’s other side, Abby’s gaze softened. Wymack’s jaw worked for a moment
before he could say in an even tone, “Your mother would be proud of you.”
“Not just of me,” Kevin said in a rare bout of humanity.
“Andrew looked as he always had, and Neil knew his face as well as he knew every iteration of his own. Despite that, something seemed different. Maybe it was the sunlight streaming through the window, making Andrew’s pale hair shine brighter and his hazel eyes seem almost gold. Whatever it was, it was disorienting.”
Nathaniel looked out the window again and wondered if that was possible. He knew in a sense he could never really leave Nathaniel behind. Even if Stuart could talk the Moriyamas down, they’d all know Nathan’s child was alive and kicking. Nathaniel would always be a security risk to them. But the thought was thrilling and chilling in turns, and Nathaniel turned his hand over to consider his palm. He traced Andrew’s key into his skin with a bandaged finger.
“Neil Abram Josten,” Neil murmured, and it felt like waking up from a bad dream.