counting stitches

mutual denial spiritassassins part five:
  • Chirrut plans their second kiss on his own
  • he invests all his free time into the logistics
  • he lies awake at night, absently counting the stitches in Baze’s sleeve with his fingertips, trying to figure out how to frame it as a joke, how to maximise the plausible deniability, how to make it something that Baze will be okay with and feel comfortable and loved and not panic afterwards
  • running through all the possible platonic justifications in his head
  • (there aren’t many)
  • but it doesn’t happen like that
  • what happens is this: things go wrong in small ways
  • Baze goes out on patrol; Chirrut stays behind
  • the rebel scoundrels leave without a fight, but some of their explosives stay behind
  • by the time Chirrut finds him, Baze has screamed himself hoarse on Chirrut’s name
  • Chirrut takes Baze into his arms, and says “sorry I’m late, I was looking for you everywhere” and tries to laugh
  • Baze grabs Chirrut’s face and kisses him, crushing and desperate
  • afterwards Baze apologises, over and over, while Chirrut leads them both home

My dear newbie yarn benders,

I love you. You’re wonderful and fabulous and energized about seeing a cool project on the inter-webs and have finally said “yes! I think I could do that! This is the one that will get me into knitting/crochet” With all the excitement and joy in the world you go to the craft store, grab the coolest looking yarn (in the best color, duh) and the cheapest needles/hook you can find (If if needles are too intimidating, you opt for the knitting loom. It comes in a 3 pack! score!). You follow the instructions as best you can with dreams of your project turning out exactly like the professionally taken photograph. Oh my naive, beautiful newbie yarn bender, you are on a craft high. Head so far in the clouds that you don’t realize what has happened until it’s done. We’ve all been here at some point, no matter how skilled a person is. 

My lovelies. Please learn from the mistakes that have already happened. Take the time to learn about gauge and value the materials needed. I am most definitely NOT saying buy the most expensive stuff. I am saying that skien of yarn that is one dollar more will likely make you enjoy the finished product bounties more than the value of one dollar. 

Take the top picture. This was most definitely made on a knitting loom. Im personally not a huge advocate of these. They’re great for learning how knitting works. Not great for endless feats of creativity. You’re limited by the size of the loom which limits you to the size of the yarn as well as the size of the object you make. For something that will not ladder (the long horizontal bits between the “V” stitches) you need yarn thick enough to touch the stitch next to it when wrapped around the loom. In the case of the photo, yarn far too thin was used. 

The next picture looks like it could be arm knitting. Which was a fad I loved. Can we bring this back instead of those pony tail hats? The larger the needle, in this case your arm, the larger yarn you need. The original appears to have multiple yarns being used. Perhaps our newbie knitter didn’t realize that’s an option? Lesson here: Larger needles, larger yarn. Smaller needles, smaller yarn. 

The last picture. This crocheted hippo went through the stretcher! oh no! This is a case of right yarn, wrong size hook. When your needle/hook is larger than your yarn and you put it under tension (in this case, stuffing it) the created fabric will stretch (more-so demonstrated in the first picture). Amigurumi is also hard as shit. The people who do it very well are incredible talented. We should all bow before their prowess. Please don’t try an amigurumi (small figurine knitting/crochet) as your first or even 5th project!

General rule of thumb: if you don’t want holes in your work look for yarn and needle/hook approx same size in diameter.

Alas, you have returned for the craft store. Heading the advice you’ve gotten complimentary yarn and needle/hook. TIME TO START THE CRAFT JUICE!



“but whyyyy?” you whine

Because we must first test the yarn.

“But tests are boooooring” says the yarn. 

I agree, talking yarn. Tests are boring and terrible and holy crap tell you if you’re doing something right or wrong. This is useful information to know before creating something beautiful with your HANDS

Also my dear newbie yarn bender, practice makes a better yarn bender. Resist the urge to pump out something fast. Pinterst lied to you. It’s not going to take 1 hour. It will take at least 3 hours and two trips to the craft store. Accept this now. Knitting/crochet is slow ASF. Accept this now. Or find a different hobby. 

So loop on some stitches and knit or crochet your joyous heart out. Then measure it once you get around 5 inches. Count the stitches horizontally and vertically. Then refer to the chart above and make sure everything agrees. Got 12 stitches per 4 inches and using DK (3) yarn? Time to change needles sizes or get your gorgeous self some bulky yarn. Or get yourself some bulky yarn anyhow. Treat yo’self. 

i love you newbie yarn benders! Go forth and create and learn

<3 Stitch

god bless the internet

Okay 20 odd years ago i was oddly terrified of home economics classes because:

a. can’t cook

b. can’t sew/embroider

c. can’t crochet

d. can’t household worth a damn

The teachers back in grade school tended to assume we were taught crochet and sewing basics by our respective mamas and grandmamas and kinda zipped us along in class.  I didn’t learn how to properly operate an old school non-electric sewing machine until high school, because FINALLY there was one student to a sewing machine, so I could figure it out and realize “WELL SHIT SON I CAN MAKE MYSELF NICE THINGS AND I LIKE IT.”

(I made myself a quilted bag.  It lasted all four years of high school.)


(Obviously, I more or less got through this because actually, man or no man, knowing how to household ARE USEFUL SURVIVAL SKILLS THAT ANY PERSON SHOULD KNOW - SO MAKE YOUR OWN DAMN SANDWICH AND SEW YOUR OWN DAMN BUTTONS.)

But now it’s not about being a “proper lady” - it’s simply knowing how to make things with your own hands, using string and needle and hook and yarn and creating pretty things that you can admire, use or both.  It’s knowing that you created an actual work of art with needle and thread - and embroidery/cross-stitching is an art form, even if you’re following counted cross stitch patterns.  THAT SHIT IS HARD AND TAKES PATIENCE AND CARE AND CRAFT, OKAY?

It’s finally picking up that crochet hook and yarn and relearning an old skill and learning new tricks along the way and making something pretty and useful knowing that it’s not about grades, it’s the satisfaction of having made something pretty and useful. 

And God bless the internet because I can quietly lurk on youtube and watch tutorial videos and figure stuff out.  God bless the Internet because I no longer feel like my clumsy, idiot nine year old self who couldn’t seem to follow along Teacher’s apparently simple and easy instructions, who kept being told that my stitches were “too tight” and who was made to feel like I’d be a failure at life if I couldn’t pass this “simple” class. 

Now when I feel the need to “unplug” from Real Life, I can just grab my craft bag of threads, needles, yarn and hooks and choose whether I’ll make myself a doily or continue my current cross stitch project. 


I can’t believe it!! After 18 months and 300+ work hours, I am finally FINALLY done with the cross stitch portion of my “American Horror Story” bag!!! I am absolutely ECSTATIC and so so proud with how of project is turning out! In total, I used around 40 skeins of DMC embroidery floss, which is more than 1,000 feet of thread. I estimate that there are roughly 33,000-35,000 stitches in the 12" x 14" design. I’ll post better pictures on facebook and instagram as I continue to work on the actual construction! ❤️👹


How to Count Rows and Stitches – Stockinette Stitch

anonymous asked:

if you're still accepting prompts, can i request tony and cats?? not kittens, but like, older, semi-feral, mean, disabled and/or black cats that are less likely to be adopted? tony being super cute and amazing and loving the cats that nobody else likes (maybe he identifies with them or something??) and his partner (bucky or tchalla) watching with heart eyes

Aw, I love Tony with cats! Sorry, I just had to sneak a kitten in here. But only one! And she’s black! Which is why he has her! Because Tony makes poor choices! Also don’t worry about T’Challa being the voice of reason. He will eventually get heart eyes. Watch out for under the cut!

It started when he found an ugly cat with a flat face and a snaggletooth. It was mean and spit at him when he tried to get close. He had to get stitches for the scratches he got getting it into a pet carrier to take it to the vet.

Tony named her Griselda.

Griselda did not like being an indoor cat. Tony did not like having to see her limp around after fights. There was no compromise—only screaming from both sides.

Tony thought getting her a friend might help her adjust, so he went to the shelter. He chose a black cat, because the receptionist had said they didn’t get adopted often, and brought it home. His name was Leonard.

Griselda did not like Leonard.

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