councillor sparatus

SPECTRES ARE NOT TRAINED, BUT CHOSEN. 
INDIVIDUALS FORGED IN THE FIRE
OF SERVICE AND BATTLE;
THOSE WHOSE ACTIONS ELEVATE THEM ABOVE
THE RANK AND FILE.
SPECTRES ARE AN IDEAL, A SYMBOL. THE 
EMBODIMENT OF COURAGE, DETERMINATION,
AND SELF-RELIANCE.THEY ARE THE
RIGHT-HAND OF THE COUNCIL,INSTRUMENTS
OF OUR WILL.
SPECTRES BEAR A GREAT BURDEN. THEY ARE 
PROTECTORS OF GALACTIC PEACE, BOTH OUR
FIRST AND LAST LINE OF DEFENSE. THE
SAFETY OF THE GALAXY IS THEIRS TO
UPHOLD.

No but think of this: Turians evolved from birds in the same way humans evolved from monkeys, missing links and evolutionary shenanigans and all.

Not that humans go around trolling people (except we do)

But imagine Shep and Garrus trolling the rest of their friends after one too many bird jokes. Just grabbing a pigeon from the presidium and presenting it as one of Garrus’ relatives, an old aunt twice removed, at the end of her life that needs special care that Shepard agreed to. Which is why she has issues holding in her shit, that’s why she keeps going around and asking people for food.

And Liara’s like “Garrus, that’s a pigeon!”

“Liara how dare you insult my aunt Abrudas!”

And since when those two troll people, they troll them HARD, there’s a full dossier on Auntie Abrudas Vakarian, to the point where Councillor Sparatus gives Shep and G a call on Omni tool, in the middle of the mess, asking about poor Abrudas.

And when James & Liara ask other Turians, even if they have no idea who Garrus is, they keep up with the story, asking about honoured war hero Abrudas, the former lover of the Primarch of Palaven.

Even Liara’s reports say something about the bird.

Just imagine, Garrus and Shep trolling the hell out of the Shadow Broker!