couldn't figure out where to put him

anonymous asked:

What would happen if different Siths were forced to watch a kid, that they couldn't kill.

As in, they are forced to be a babysitter? What a cruel punishment….

vader: y’all really gonna put anakin in the same room as a youngling? the stupid kid keeps playing with his cape until vader loses his patience and just holds him in place with the force.. then they look at him with the saddest little eyes and his heart melts. vader is happy to walk around with the little tyke hiding underneath his cape for the rest of the day as the officers try to figure out where that tiny giggling is coming from.

sidious: his attempts to turn them to the dark side don’t work, so he tries desperately to ignore them—to no avail. he then proceeds to feed them absurd amounts of sugar and toss them into dooku’s room. problem solved.

maul: has a staring contest with them, refusing to move from his spot cross-legged on the floor. at first it works as the kid just stares back, but then they start to cry and he panics, frantically picking them up (which only makes them cry harder) and sings/chants “stoooop cryingggg… stop stop stoooop crying…” maul stands there as they fall asleep, a defeated sigh escaping his lips.

savage: he has experience with kids, being an older brother to both maul and feral, so when he ends up being a babysitter it comes easy to him. savage happily watches them, answering all the questions they have (”hey where do babies come from?” “um.”) and letting them burn their energy away. piece of cake.

asajj: ugh. go away. stop pestering me. you’re hungry? there’s food in the fridge, go have whatever y-nO PUT THAT WINE DOWN. she decides to tell them stories about the nightsisters in the hope they’ll shit their pants and stay away from her, but it has the opposite effect. asajj still doesn’t like them, but is quite impressed that they press her for more.

dooku: shows them around the library, reading to them and force-pulling them away from fragile things around the house. dooku thought he’d loathe looking after the kid, but he’s actually starting to enjoy himself. this kid is pretty quiet and—SHEEV WHAT THE HELL

kylo: sprints around starkiller base with the kid on his shoulders, laughing maniacally and force-pushing everything in his way. lectures anybody that complains about his “parenting”, insisting that this is the best way to relieve tension. shows the kid his cool collection of darth vader posters.

nihilus: has no idea what to do, so he just kinda follows the kid around and makes sure they don’t hurt themselves. it turns out the child is deaf, which excites nihilus. the kid reads his body language very well and teaches him sign language. nihilus has the time of his life communicating with the little one.

grievous: lets the kid play with gor while he works on reports and ship maintenance. none of the other sith know this, but he had many children before he became Grievous. it’s still annoying, being an impromptu babysitter, but he knows how to keep an eye on them. 

Kyle: Well Stan is my super best friend so there’s lots of things I like about him. But if I have to pick one thing it would probably be…he’s always there for me I guess, I mean Kenny can be supportive. And Cartman is……Cartman. So Stan is my one friend I can usually rely on.

Kyle: Kenny is… well I worry about him sometimes. But what’s great about him is that even when really shitty stuff happens to him he almost always bounces back. He has a terrible home life, but always puts on a smile for us. Which in my book is really awesome. Maybe not so much for him but there isn’t much I can do about it.

There are a lot of things I feel about Cartman. I think he’s a fat, short, asshole who doesn’t know how to mind his own business. He’s always ruining shit and getting in the way of of everything. If something bad happens it’s usually because of something this dumbass did. But I figure you weirdos won’t leave me alone until I say something positive about him..So I guess he has nice hair. Are you happy now?

Car adventures

Minho get’s into some trouble with a gang and Newt is involved whether he wants it or not. I was thinking of doing a second part of this, with more Minewt. So if actually someone enjoys this then I might just do that :)

Minho would never have thought that this would be how he would meet the love of his life. Well he never thought that he would do something so stupid in the first place but he didn’t have much of a choice.

“Get back here asshole!” voices screamed behind him “We’ll find you! Don’t even bother hiding!”

Minho cussed when the voices got closer. How did he always manage to get in these situations? Well he had kind of been asking for it today to be fair…

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