08.14.2011 22

Today took a toll on me, but had it’s glimmers of laughter. Things I decided today: the employees at Corner Bakery are the bane of my existence, I need to pay more attention to detail, especially when sending important e-mails,& adding “pancake” into any band name makes it automatically funny.

Anyways, sitting here at my desk, getting real with Spotify & Lily Allen’s 22 came on. It’s pretty spot on for this month, my last of being 22. And feeling like I’m really stretching my boundaries when it comes to things I’ve historically struggled with–conflict management, having a bit more self confidence, confronting problems head-on versus harboring judgments, really feeling like I’m pushing myself but feeling very stationary in every sense of the word. 

She’s got an alright job but it’s not a career
Whenever she thinks about it, it brings her to tears
Cause all she wants is a boyfriend
She gets one-night stands
She’s thinking “How did I get here?
I’m doing all that I can.”

It’s sad, but it’s true how society says
Her life is already over
There’s nothing to do and there’s nothing to say
‘Til the man of her dreams comes along, picks her up and puts her over his shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age

…maybe minus the one night stands part? It’s been a year–first job, first apartment on my own, first Mardi Gras, beginning of this blog (!), saw Stars, Of Montreal, Kanye West, Kid Cudi, Girltalk, Drake, Fitz & The Tantrums, and Iron & Wine in concert, Packers won the Superbowl, traveled to St. Louis, Schaumburg, & Indian Wells, CA for work, road tripped the coast of California with a group of folks I’ve overcome a lot with, went to Canada for Nicole’s Wedding, and, perhaps the hardest, said goodbye to Abby and braved Chicago on my own.

Looking forward to year twenty three with fresh eyes. Goals? Not leaving leaving my success up to happy accidents. Living purposefully through the filters of the three things I value most: (a) dependability, (b) thoughtfulness, & © individuality. Thinking every morning I walk into work “How am I going to show up today?” Then living that out. Being choosier with my words.  Living a year I’ll be proud of 20 years from now.