I thought unrequited love would feel a lot worse than this. Don’t get me wrong, it still feels awful. Everyday, I have some amount of moments in which I wish that you could smile one of your softest smiles just for me. If only my love for you were that soft. If only my mind wasn’t hammered with thought after thought of you, a storm I can’t ever find shelter from. I know it sounds bad, but in reality, you only cause this one storm and stop every other. It’s hard to be upset when the living embodiment of sunshine is always with you in one way or another. And I guess that’s why even though you don’t feel the same, it doesn’t make me want to drift away from you, even if my heart just cracks further.  Of course, there can’t be two Suns, so I’ll be your sky. I’ll support you, even if it means having to help you in your own quest for love. Why would I do something like this? Well, I don’t really know myself. I guess if I had to give a reason, it’d be this: you make me want to be better, and I want to do the same for you. So if you won’t love me back, at least let me do this much. Let me love you from afar, but keep you close.
—  Maxwell Diawuoh, Request: Falling in love with your bestfriend, knowing they don’t feel the same. She’s the sweetest, nicest person i’ve ever met just filled with sunshine and soft smiles. i can’t help but love her more everytime i see her, even knowing she won’t ever feel the same. i’ll support her no matter what, whether that means helping her in her own love life. she’s the sun and i can be the sky. i’ll never be as brave as i once was, but she makes me wanna try.
I always thought my world would end with a clap of thunder or the bang of a gun,
But it ended in a whisper,
And please don’t show up at my door,
Because you know I’m too weak - I’ll gush “I love you too” and welcome you like a soldier home from war,
I want to pretend I’m strong and that I’ve prepared for the apocalypse of my heart,
But I know I’m weak and I’ll always come when you call,
Because my heart still beats to the sound of your name in the silence around me; and part of me still hopes yours beats for me too
Gentle whispers guide my thoughts
While my mind hikes through hell
Free climbing it’s problems
With earth & rock to grab along the way
I have no rope to lead me
If I fall
Forever I will stay
Pressed face down against wet moss
Leaves suffocating my face
So before I climb this mountain
Make damn sure
Forever’s far away
I’ve packed a lonesome travel kit
Filled with voluntary aches
It has insomnia to sleep in
& guilt to guide the way
Affairs that I can feed on
Those fill me everyday
My first aid kit is poisonous
To confuse me through the pain
This mountain of destruction
I’m climbing it today
—  Whispers with Andy I.
We used to talk.
—  💜

quite often you speak into existence
the deep and well-fermented fear
that soon, whilst weaving intoxication
you’ll perhaps run away from here

I am not afraid of loss; it has known me
but with every advancing year
the wells of my want, partial to you
compile a centum more tears

How merciful He is, to still call me His child every time I stray. 
Time and time again, I find myself in the arms of someone He wouldn’t be pleased with, someone I want to have space from but find myself drawn to.
These actions that we partake in, these sins that we partake in, they make my heart heavy with guilt.
Prayers taste sour, like my flesh knows I don’t deserve to say them, or almost as if it simply doesn’t want to.
Yet even so, he still loves me despite these things I do.
With arms open and palpable love, despite His anger, despite His sadness, He calls out to me.
‘Come back to Me. Come back.’
—  Maxwell Diawuoh, Request: How God feels about your ungodly relationship, and how you want to have boundaries with this person, but you realize that every time you are with them you do something you regret yet again. And how guilty you feel afterwards?
Every piece of you
is tucked away and there
are so many. I found one
between my legs
but when I picked it up
it crumbled. Now
there are even more.
I swear I didn’t mean
to break you. I swear all I wanted
was to hold you. I never wanted
to fuck you.
In a way,
that’s a lie.
I think I’m just
too fragile, but I do want your body, not just
your mind.
I want to know you.
I keep finding you in the garden beds
and between the fence posts
and inside the light bulbs
and underneath my fingernails.
But now, I’m too afraid
to pick you up.
If I thought that you could find me instead,
I would let you.
I would give you all the pieces.
I would tell you to keep me safe
inside your mouth.
The problem with that is
I’m much more scattered than you.
I can’t seem to remember where
I left all the bits. I think
I’ve spent so long chasing you
that I forgot to bring
myself along for the ride.
—  On finding you

businesscasualprincess  asked:

Thoughts on the supposed rarity of True Love: if you assume that True Love is an emotion, not a destiny (which makes sense with the memory curse rule, as well as rumbe||e), then perhaps it's not True Love that's rare, so much as people capable (1/2)

(2/2) of feeling that type of Love? It could explain why we see so much if it, because I would imagine those sorts if people would naturally cluster together in groups. Also it explains how people seem predisposed to having more than one type of TL.

Hoo, boy, this topic. :) I feel like the show has written itself into a terribly awkward corner where True Love is concerned, and that corner has only gotten more confining as the seasons pass. I have a long-standing problem with the rarity value of true love, since it strongly implies a hierarchy of love, which I find Icky. However.  

First, I would definitely say that True Love is a state of being. It has a beginning, it can have an end, it can be interrupted and resume (see: memory curses), and it can be denied. Curse situations give it a tidy binary measurement at a specific point in time.  You either love each other more than anything else, or you don’t.

Let us review our known True Love constellations. I’m gonna draw a picture here (yay).

I ran out of room for Rumple’s little family drama, but the cluster effect is pretty clear.  Aurora’s family has two generations of True Love participants, as does Hook’s (which I dunno, I find pretty funny). With Snow’s family we get three, plus a secondary branch going from Henry back up to Regina – who is, of course, also connected to Snow White.

This show, I swear.

So, is there a True Love gene? Or the magical equivalent? Given how personal histories and themes repeat across the generations, it doesn’t seem too far-fetched that it could be part of the rules of this universe.

OR it could be memetic and not physical! Snow White, hey? She has a true love of her own, who is himself (said to be) the product of it himself. She has connections of some kind with most of the True Loves we’ve met. I think you could make a case for her being ground zero of a kind of True Love “event”. Maybe True Love used to be rare, but since Snow’s arrival in the world, not so much. (It sort of fits in with her Mother Mary role in the mythology…?)

I don’t know, but it’s fun to think about.

anonymous asked:

Hello, thanks for subbing 5th stage~ ^^ I just wanna ask whether you guys have any plan to sub more utapri stuffs in the future? If yes, it'd be great! I'd love to see your projects! Thanks a lot!

Thank you, Anon! It was a fun project and we’re all proud of it.

I’m not sure what you mean by subbing more Utapri, but the blogs below are good sources for translations:

For subbed videos, I know @rhain-things works on Quiz no Prince-sama videos (subbed) when they can. As for me, my next project is updating (re-time and re-color) my songs-plus-one-talk-corner sub for Maji Love Live 1000% 2nd Stage (all of my subs are listed on my Masterpost).

If anyone approaches me about the 5th stage backstage or day talks, I’m happy to work on the subs. I hope this answers your question! (and if not, please feel free to ask again. ^^)

september 27th, 2016 hey, guys! i haven’t been active these past few days, but it’s because i’ve been so busy with school! two tests two days in a row. i got a 100 on my christian worldview test, and i’m aiming for a high A on my communcation test today! lots of coffee to get me through ☕️️…. i hope you’re all having a wonderful semester so far! fall break is right around the corner 😛😇 - love and studies, el

I’m needy.

There, I said it. But it doesn’t mean what you think it means. It doesn’t mean I want to deprive you from your friends and family. It means I want to feel like you want me to be part of your daily life just like they are. I want you to bring me to family holidays so your great aunt can ask about my name. I want you to hold my hand while we’re sitting on the couch of your grandparents house and they’re telling stories about you when you were four years old. I don’t want you to hold me. I want you to figure out how my body works and show me affection. I want your hand on my back, asking me about the scar on the back of my arm. I want you stroking my hair while you tell me all the things you think about late at night. I don’t want you to coddle me. I don’t want you to constantly text me. I just want you to tell me when you make it home so I know you’re safe for the night. I want you to tell me about the bad day you had and how you found out your grandpa has cancer. I want to know how all of this makes you feel. I don’t want be another “needy” girl to you. I want to be entirely yours, and most of all, I need to know that you are entirely mine.

So yeah, I guess I’m a little “needy.”

—  Needy
i lost you between the pages
of goodbye poems
i had already written
i’m sorry–
i tend to let go of people
before they have the chance
to let go of me.
—  poeticallyordinary
Wrap your arms around me, I’ll wrap my arms around you, and for just a little while, we can pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist.
For a little while, we can disappear.
Now that’s what I call magic.
—  Maxwell Diawuoh, Once A Day (247/366)
i let him inside last night, it was cold,
the blood on the living room carpet is mine
not his, his chipped china face
shouldn’t be there, his sing-song voice
shouldn’t echo where it doesn’t belong.
he shouldn’t belong here.
i let him closer to my heart than any other
childhood memory martyr,
any other missing fragment, fractured
glass shard fingernails digging into flesh,
this mighty muscle has become so raw
i doubt healing will be an option.
i miss him.  i miss feeling fields of strawberry lips
swaying, lulling me to sleep in his arms,
strong trees that planted roots among my own.
“its only dirt” he’d said,
but this dirt was my only home.
i can’t plant flowers here anymore.
his roots sucked the soil dry, void of happiness,
i can’t grow gardens anymore. spots of orange light
still shine through drawn curtains,
but the setting sun is not enough. this isn’t enough.
it was never enough.
i was never enough.
—  poeticallyordinary; Love, Lover, Loved, Lost.