corn dog cart

Q & A With Lil Big O

Why don’t you have a million subscribers?

Ah yes the big Q with no A. I’ve seen this question stalking me like Harry & Marv in a van after my morning grocery run. Maybe I don’t upload enough? Maybe I don’t have blue eyes and a accent of some foreign magical land where gum drops grow on trees? Maybe my love for peanut butter cups is off putting?

If I may answer in a giant metaphor….Imagine a big game of kickball being played and all the best and greatest online personalities are playing in this game. Which team am I on? Well I’m not even in the game… got passed over for someone with a stronger kicking number ratio. I’m mostly over by the corn dog cart getting a couple of dogs while the game is going on. Meaning I’m doing my own things 99% of the time. I sometimes get close to the game but it’s usually because I’m walking by to go the funnel cake cart. Some of the millions of people watching this kickball game catch the scent of the funnel cake warming the palms of my hands and come to see what’s it all about. Soon a small line forms! Little Billy shouts at this mother watching the game to “Come check out these funnel cakes and C Dogs!”. This is usually how people come to find me by word of mouth. It’s a slow process and the people watching the kickball game are so entranced they ignore happenings of the fairgrounds and it’s delights. The fairgrounds has many very extremely way too talented people walking around mingling with a hot plate of yard nachos, bbq, and or ice-cream shoveled into a small condiment cup. However the majority just want to watch the big game and on occasion when one needs to use the bathroom they might discover the boy holding a festive corn dog covered in yellow mustard and or a piping hot burn the roof of your mouth funnel cake. It’s hard to get into the big game and most will only see the fairgrounds. One day the lil ole southern boy will drop the half eaten metaphor corn dog and funnel cake and walk off the metaphor fairgrounds. However he still hungers for the battered dog and the deep fried hollow sugar powder happiness cake so you can find me quite happy by the food carts!
Not sure if that answers it or not. -🍩LAN

Imagine your OTP at a grocery store. Person B walks by A with a cart half-filled with what they usually get, but there is one product out of the ordinary that person A doesn’t feel so good about. They tell person B to put the item back, but person B picks it up, holds it to their chest, lies on their back and slides away, yelling, “You can’t make me do anything!” (x)

Synopsis: Seems you can’t take him anywhere anymore.

Note: The vine had corn dogs in the cart, right? I can’t remember. 

Dennis flipped through the slightly outdated tabloids, scanning for anything remotely interesting. Next to him, his daughter was doing the same, albeit with more enthusiasm. 

“Can I get some of these?” Lolly held up a small stack of magazines, when she finished the one she had. 

The patriarch looked at the newsstand prices, and his eyes widened in shock. 

“Oh hell, child! Buying all those would take up nearly my entire paycheck! Just get one.” 

Lolly’s expression darkened. She pulled out the one she wanted the most, then threw the rest back onto the magazine rack. “How long until Ren and Stimpy get back with the cart?”

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