conversations with my thirteen year old self

Music Man

Another thing @apollomatic101 tag me in, that was a few days, I getting to it know.

So the Challenge is that I have to list 10 songs that I really like right now.

1. On the Brightside - Nevershoutnever

2. Tea and Toast - Lucy Spraggon

3. Hope of Morning - Icon For Hire 

4. Circles - Passenger

5. Take me to Church - Hozier 

6. Little Talks - Of Monsters and Men

7. Conversations with my Thirteen-Year-Old self - P!nk

8. Fireflies - Owl City

9. Some Nights - Fun

10. Paradise - Cold Play

Dirk & the AR

Now I’m going to write some stuff about Dirk and the auto-responder, because to me their relationship is actually one of the most interesting things in the comic.

So as I mentioned before it’s heavily implied the entire Synch/Unite sequence was orchestrated more by the AR than by Dirk himself:

GT: You never answered my question!
GT: Did you plan for this to happen… like for me to be in this situation?
GT: How long have your machinations been in play!
TT: Jake, come on.
TT: The feat you describe would exceed the capabilities of even the most far fetched theoretical AI system.
TT: It would be a daunting challenge to engineer such a series of events, even if I was relegated to a model of pure fiction.
TT: Why would I be inclined to orchestrate such a convoluted sequence to produce such a specific and unsettling result, let alone be able to pull it off?
TT: In addition to being moderately sociopathic, I would also have to possess unfathomable heuristic depth.
TT: I would have to be the Deep Blue of Weird Plot Shit.
TT: Do you think I am the Deep Blue of Weird Plot Shit, Jake?

Keep reading

Here I am

Here I am reading about how the asterisk * that some choose to include in trans* is transmisogynistic.

Here I am reading about how “cishet” is a new word. Well, I don’t understand why we “need” it but I suppose it’s better than “cisscum” I guess since that literally has “cum” in it and, after laughing for about a half hour at Iowa’s gas station “Kum & Go,” my inner thirteen-year-old self simply cannot handle cisscum (also because it is so very, very negative and pretty awful overall!)

Here I am reading more and more from folks who are defining words, redefining words, coming to conclusions that transmen or FAAB people are consciously leaving transwomen or MAAB people out of conversations, movements, life.

Here I am reading messages and comments from people telling me “this word, wrong.” “that word, wrong.” “you should have said this, you did it wrong.”

Here I am reading all of these written from a defensive or offensive standpoint, peppered in salt and hate and negativity.

What are we coming to?

Here I am to say that when I use any word, when I use an asterisk for any purpose, when I say absolutely anything about being trans or about life in general as a whole - I do not have malicious intentions. I never do. I have love for and friends that fall beneath every chosen “label” in this life - transwomen, gender fluid, cross-dressers, transmen, transfeminine folks, trans* folks, genderqueer, genderless, gay, straight, bi, asexual, gray-a, demi-sexual, agender, ____, ________, ________, ___ ____, __________, _____, ______ and on and on.

I support everyone individually - I am an ally to the person that I meet, I ask them “How can I be a better ally or friend to you?” and I listen. I listen to stories and stories, lives. I can never listen enough. I can never stop improving and being a better ally or friend. 

I finish every lecture or speech or performance I give by saying, “The best way to be an ally to a person who comes out to you as transgender, genderqueer, gay, anything - is to simply ask them, ‘How can I be the ally that you want and need? Let me know the best ways to be there for you, and I will be.’”

Because everyone is different. Every “label” is defined differently. Every single story and journey is unique, wonderful, hard, easy, sad, happy or anything and everything else. Why are we arguing over words? Well, because they are important. Absolutely. But, why are we so fueled by hate and negativity?

Has the world been hard to me? Yes.
Have I received hate, physical, emotional, verbal abuse? Absolutely.
Have cisgender folks shown me hatred and ignorance? Of course.
Have non-binary or transgender folks shown me hatred and ignorance? Of course.

Can we educate without being hateful? Yes.
Can we label ourselves without defining others? Yes.
Can we disagree without being disagreeable? Yes.
Can we make mistakes, but learn from them, and be forgiven? Yes.

So, Tumblr world, all I have to say is this -

Whenever I say anything, it is from my own personal experience. My own journey. My own observations. My own perceptions.

I make mistakes because of language all the time. But I never intend to be malicious. My intentions are never malicious. I am always learning - hell, we all are. Learning never ends.

Here I am hoping to give love and receive love.
Here I am hoping for happiness for everyone.
Here I am hoping that this makes sense, because everything is so dang confusing and difficult and wild and crazy and free.

Here I am, simply asking -

Can we no longer assume that people are being hateful until they show us hate?
Can we have questions simply be questions for the sake of education?
Can we stop defining definitions, because when we do, we strip people’s rights to being themselves, defining themselves, and being simply beings?

Can we?