Ok but imagine how the aliens would react to the idea of the “mom friend”. Like the crew is losing their mind over the fact their human is reckless, doing so many dangerous things that would have killed any other race but of course it’s fine because it’s a human and those things are so hard to kill anyway.
The only planet that is a danger to a human is the one it came from.
So when the human-Kat comes into the control room with that adorable hopeful face a lot of the crew members are instantly on guard. The last time Human-Kat had that expression they almost lost Xe'rex to the waves of that one planet that Human-Kat just had to “Surf”.
“Can my friend Lola come meet us for the 34-OJ mission? She’s right in our pathway to that new planet? Please?” Huamn-Kat says and though they want nothing more then to say no, the crew of 626- Launch can’t say anything else other then yes. They know how humans react when left alone for too long. Humans claim that their greatest criminals are placed in “solitary confinement” as punishment which goes very far to show how much bonds affect their life spans.
Human-Kat needs human interaction to stay alive and sane (or as sane as humans can be)
So the crew agrees to have Friend-Lola on the voyage, slightly terrified of having two humans. But when the new human arrives it is not what they expected.
“Kat, have you finished your paperwork? Come on man, you know it’s due in like a day. Get on it.”
“Whoa dude, I love you ok. But no. You are not going to go surfing down there. It’s for your own good.”
“Girl you got the promotion?! Yes! Ok Ok! We need to celebrate with girls night in!”
“Hey I have some tissues in my bag somewhere hold on. There ya go.”
“Look at this game I picked up on RE-vr’. It’s just like Cards against Humanity but space!”
“Go. To. Sleep. Kat.”
“Remember that pact we made in high school? The one where I would stop you from doing something that will get you arrested or killed? Yeah well I’m calling it into action and saying that you do not lick anything on a unknown planet!“
This Human…holds common sense? That is possible for that race?!
After Friend-Lola leaves they ask Human-Kat about this and she merely laughs while swiping through photographs she had taken with the other human.
"Well Lola is the mom friend.”
And the crew of 626-Luanch are so confused because they have already seen photos of Human-Kat’s birth givers and they look nothing alike not to mention Human-Kat already has a Mom. Do humans have more then one “Mom”?
“Oh you know a mom friend is the one friend in a group that keeps everyone else from dying.” Human-Kat jokes.
But the crew is amazed. They have learn the reason humanity haven’t killed itself off. They send a message to every out post in the area.
If xe have a human on-board make sure that they are accompanied by a Mom Friend. These are the humans in charge of keeping other humans alive and well-behaved.
Some things never change. Over 20 years later, our Facilities Systems Manager Eric is still on the job manning the boards in our control room. How many differences can you spot in this Throwback Thursday comparison?
- nail art. phil orders a bunch of nail polish, vinyls, tools he will definitely not use and makes dan his guinea pig by trying to recreate some of the most complicated designs from the internet. in the end, dan tells him to pass on nail polish remover which phil obviously forgot to get, so dan just dumps a container of glitter onto phil’s bed
- candle review. what starts like a peaceful danisnotinteresting video turns into an hour-long unedited mess of dnp arguing about the smells and ordering a shitload of candles for the next video
- making friendship bracelets. dan teaches phil to make bracelets and at the end of the video they exchange their creations, phil’s is a bit wonkier one, dan’s has a rainbow gradient color scheme. since then, we can see them wearing those bracelets all the time
- christmas decorating in a new flat. dnp go out of their way to make the house looks as festive as possible. we get to see them choose the biggest box of christmas lights, buy a huge tree they barely manage to set up in the lounge, and dan hang hundreds of silver stars in the moon room
- controlling each other in the sims. we see dnp create each other in the sims (without the other participating or being in a video altogether), decorating their houses, giving each other pets, careers, hobbies. dan tries to hide how unreasonably jealous he is when his phil sim starts flirting with a random character
- ikea shopping. loading the cart with candles, photo frames, blankets, and pillows. stealing a dozen of free pencils, sitting on comfy sofas, choosing random domestic items like new towels and coasters. “we do need new pillowcases” says dan picking two grey ones without a second thought
13 Reasons to Have an Out-of-This-World Friday (the 13th)
1. Not all of humanity is bound to the ground
Since 2000, the International Space Station has been continuously occupied by humans. There, crew members live and work while conducting important research that benefits life on Earth and will even help us eventually travel to deep space destinations, like Mars.
2. We’re working to develop quieter supersonic aircraft that would allow you to travel from New York to Los Angeles in 2 hours
We are working hard to make flight greener, safer and quieter – all while developing aircraft that travel faster, and building an aviation system that operates more efficiently. Seventy years after Chuck Yeager broke the sound barrier in the Bell X-1 aircraft, we’re continuing that supersonic X-plane legacy by working to create a quieter supersonic jet with an aim toward passenger flight.
3. The spacecraft, rockets and systems developed to send astronauts to low-Earth orbit as part of our Commercial Crew Program is also helping us get to Mars
Changes to the human body during long-duration spaceflight are significant challenges to solve ahead of a mission to Mars and back. The space station allows us to perform long duration missions without leaving Earth’s orbit.
Although they are orbiting Earth, space station astronauts spend months at a time in near-zero gravity, which allows scientists to study several physiological changes and test potential solutions. The more time they spend in space, the more helpful the station crew members can be to those on Earth assembling the plans to go to Mars.
4. We’re launching a spacecraft in 2018 that will go “touch the Sun”
In the summer of 2018, we’re launching Parker Solar Probe, a spacecraft that will get closer to the Sun than any other in human history. Parker Solar Probe will fly directly through the Sun’s atmosphere, called the corona. Getting better measurements of this region is key to understanding our Sun.
For instance, the Sun releases a constant outflow of solar material, called the solar wind. We think the corona is where this solar wind is accelerated out into the solar system, and Parker Solar Probe’s measurements should help us pinpoint how that happens.
5. You can digitally fly along with spacecraft…that are actually in space…in real-time!
NASA’s Eyes are immersive, 3D simulations of real events, spacecraft locations and trajectories. Through this interactive app, you can experience Earth and our solar system, the universe and the spacecraft exploring them. Want to watch as our Juno spacecraft makes its next orbit around Juno? You can! Or relive all of the Voyager mission highlights in real-time? You can do that too! Download the free app HERE to start exploring.
6. When you feel far away from home, you can think of the New Horizons spacecraft as it heads toward the Kuiper Belt, and the Voyager spacecraft are beyond the influence of our sun…billions of miles away
Our New Horizons spacecraft completed its Pluto flyby in July 2015 and has continued on its way toward the Kuiper Belt. The spacecraft continues to send back important data as it travels toward deeper space at more than 32,000 miles per hour, and is ~3.2 billion miles from Earth.
In addition to New Horizons, our twin Voyager 1 and 2 spacecraft are exploring where nothing from Earth has flown before. Continuing on their more-than-37-year journey since their 1977 launches, they are each much farther away from Earth and the sun than Pluto. In August 2012, Voyager 1 made the historic entry into interstellar space, the region between the stars, filled with material ejected by the death of nearby stars millions of years ago.
7. There are humans brave enough to not only travel in space, but venture outside space station to perform important repairs and updates during spacewalks
Just this month (October 2017) we’ve already had two spacewalks on the International Space Station…with another scheduled on Oct. 20.
Spacewalks are important events where crew members repair, maintain and upgrade parts of the International Space Station. These activities can also be referred to as EVAs – Extravehicular Activities. Not only do spacewalks require an enormous amount of work to prepare for, but they are physically demanding on the astronauts. They are working in the vacuum of space in only their spacewalking suit.
8. Smart people are up all night working in control rooms all over NASA to ensure that data keeps flowing from our satellites and spacecraft
Our satellites and spacecraft help scientists study Earth and space. Missions looking toward Earth provide information about clouds, oceans, land and ice. They also measure gases in the atmosphere, such as ozone and carbon dioxide and the amount of energy that Earth absorbs and emits. And satellites monitor wildfires, volcanoes and their smoke.
9. A lot of NASA-developed tech has been transferred for use to the public
Our Technology Transfer Program highlights technologies that were originally designed for our mission needs, but have since been introduced to the public market. HERE are a few spinoff technologies that you might not know about.
10. We have a spacecraft currently traveling to an asteroid to collect a sample and bring it back to Earth
OSIRIS-REx is our first-ever mission that will travel to an asteroid and bring a sample of it back to Earth. Currently, the spacecraft is on its way to asteroid Bennu where it will survey and map the object before it “high-fives” the asteroid with its robotic arm to collect a sample, which it will send to Earth.
If everything goes according to plan, on Sept. 24, 2023, the capsule containing the asteroid sample will make a soft landing in the Utah desert.
11. There are Earth-sized planets outside our solar system that may be habitable
To date, we have confirmed 3,000+ exoplanets, which are planets outside our solar system that orbit a Sun-like star. Of these 3,000, some are in the habitable zone – where the temperature is just right for liquid water to exist on the surface.
In 1960, the United States put its first Earth-observing environmental satellite into orbit around the planet. Over the decades, these satellites have provided invaluable information, and the vantage point of space has provided new perspectives on Earth.
The beauty of Earth is clear, and the artistry ranges from the surreal to the sublime.
13. We’re building a telescope that will be able to see the first stars ever formed in the universe
Wouldn’t it be neat to see a period of the universe’s history that we’ve never seen before? That’s exactly what the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST) will be able to do…plus more!
Specifically, Webb will see the first objects that formed as the universe cooled down after the Big Bang. We don’t know exactly when the universe made the first stars and galaxies – or how for that matter. That is what we are building Webb to help answer.
Happy Friday the 13th! We hope it’s out-of-this-world!
Years ago, I taught Sunday school on a voluntary basis at a megachurch in my town. There were so many children in this church that classrooms were made available to group children with Sunday school teachers for every year of their life until middle school and high school, at which point they attended a larger group with similarly aged peers in separate wings of the building. I taught two-year-olds, and loved every moment of it.
My classroom boasted a huge number of children, at about 20-25 per service. I was supposed to have an adult co-teacher, but all the other adult volunteers were sent to other classrooms with a “higher need”. I had two high-school-aged volunteers, best friends, who often spent service time playing together, despite repeated approaches to asking them to play with the children (one of my volunteers was the director’s son, who I couldn’t replace because of his mother, and who clearly did not want to be volunteering).
Despite this, and despite inheriting a huge classroom full of several special needs children, my children played calmly throughout service, and enjoyed a routine and simple rules I set to run the classroom efficiently. Children arrived, played calmly, sang songs, ate snack, and went home.
Even in the face of this obvious evidence that my classroom was running efficiently, I was repeatedly asked by church leaders to adopt certain mannerisms around children I found inauthentic and frankly patronizing. I don’t and won’t speak in a high-pitched voice to anyone, child or adult. I don’t and won’t use words like “upsie daisy”. These requests were persistent. It was the opinion of the church that I was not “warm and welcoming” enough. It was modeled again and again that the church would prefer I was overanimated in a HUGE SMILE HUG “I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE HERE” kind of greeting.
One summer day we were all called (some 50+ room leaders and volunteers) into a mandatory meeting. You know those meetings where you instantly know they’re talking about you? The policies on words like “upsie daisy” were now set in writing, and I was shortly asked to step down for not using these phrases. I was not allowed to prepare my children for the transition to a new Sunday teacher. I was immediately replaced (by a friend, actually) and was fairly crushed about the sudden break from little people I liked spending time with. And furthermore, it made me question my abilities to work with children, an endeavor I had already devoted my life to.
Unbeknownst to my church, I had long been working at a career in early childhood intervention, teaching a classroom full of two-year-old child victims of trauma and abuse with a heavy case load of special needs children. My coworker called me over one Monday, as I was the twos teacher, asking what I made of this email she had just received concerning a church with an out-of-control twos room requesting that someone come consult with their new staff and help implement some new classroom techniques to “manage difficult behaviors”.
Naturally, I agreed to do the consult in person as soon as possible, and asked my coworker to let them know I would meet with them on a completely voluntary basis at their next Sunday service.
It was absolutely my pleasure to greet my church leaders and friend as their specialist consultant, to their confused surprise.
I walked them through all sorts of interventions and strategies I had previously used to create a calm classroom environment and strongly advised against the use of overly excited greetings and phrases like “upsie daisy” in place of direct redirective requests (e.g. “Please put your feet back on the floor.”) It was my strong written recommendation that the written policies on these strategies be amended and for staff to be immediately retrained in accordance with actual therapeutic practices.
It was my last time stepping foot in that church, and will forever remain my most deliciously cherished memories of vindication.
Farewell From Saturn: Cassini’s Dazzling Photos of Ringed Planet
Cassini disintegrated in the skies above Saturn early on Friday, following a remarkable journey of 20 years. For more than half of those years, Cassini has been sending us captivating images of Saturn, its mysterious rings, and its family of icy moons.
See more here.