consulting ranger

(Note: All real nhl teams are populated by fake fictional people in this fic.

Also note: I’m sorry this is disjuncted, I just needed to bang this out.

Triple note: yes this is a pride and prejudice au. 

edit: Part 1

“Brah, brah!” Shitty burst into Jack’s apartment. Jack was sitting next to his counter with a protein shake and smiling down at his phone dopily. “You gotta listen to me.” 

“The emergency key is for emergencies, Shits.” Jack sent a smiling emoji to the other person and received a string of unintelligible emojis in return. It was adorable. 

“There are two emergencies today,” Shitty said. “No, strike that, make it three. So the first emergency is that I wanted to see you.” 

“You can’t keep using that excuse to burst into my apartment whenever you feel like it.”

“Shhh,” Shitty put his hand over Jack’s mouth. “Just let me love you.”

“The second emergency is that I finally ran Chad Wickham out of Providence and I wanted to celebrate that with you,” Shitty plopped a bag of booze and snacks onto the counter.

“Shits, I’m not eating that junk,” Jack said, still looking down at his phone. “Anyway, Eric left some pie and pastries we can eat if you have to celebrate this.”

“That’s the third emergency, brah.” Shitty said seriously. “That bro is bad news. You gotta ditch him.”

Jack’s phone buzzed twice. 

Eric: Omg Shitty is there? Tell him hello from me! 

Eric: I left some banana pie in the fridge for him tell him to help himself!!! UuU

The two of them looked down at the text. 

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