connie agrees

Jasper has literally beaten Steven before. Lapis stole the entire ocean. Peridot has tried to kill the gems more than once. Lars has always been a dick to Steven. Sadie kept Steven from going back home on the warp pad for days on an island just so she could have time with Lars. Ronaldo had kidnapped Steven before. Ruby almost accidentally boiled Steven alive, and Sapphire almost froze him. Pearl was going to let Steven fall off that cliff-thingy in the Rose’s Scabbard episode. Steven watched as Amethyst emotionally toyed with his father by transforming into Rose. The goddamn mayor almost ran him over with his truck before. Despite this, I don’t believe Steven holds any grudges against them.

but fuCK KEVIN

honestly I’m not feeling all too good at the moment but at least I’m not running a blog tearing apart a kids cartoon show because you disagree with the morality of the child protagonist who was written for children 


Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V / Part VI / Part VII / Epilogue

Well, here we are guys. Thank you everyone who has read up to this point. You’ve all made it worthwhile.

Mikasa ignores the brightness of the rising summer sun from behind her closed eyelids by throwing an arm around Levi and burrowing into the space between his neck and his pillow. Her half awake mind vaguely remembers that he finds the way she does this strange but she doesn’t really care.

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Meanwhile on Earth
  • Garnet: Lapis! Peridot! We need your help! Homeworld has come back!
  • Peridot: What? What do they want from us?
  • Amethyst: They were trying to abduct the humans and there was Aquamarine, she overpowered us with some kind of wand.
  • Peridot: Aquamarine! That pompous clod... Aight I am ready to help.
  • Lapis: Nope, I don't care.
  • Peridot: Lapis?!
  • Lapis: Why should I care about what Homeworld wants with the humans? It was not like I was particularly close with any of them.
  • Pearl: We got most of the humans, but they have Steven!
  • Lapis: What! How did you let that happen to him!
  • Connie: He agreed to come with them. He is making up the crimes Rose has done in the past...
  • Sadie: And I think they also took Lars! Please you gotta help us!
  • Pearl: They are going to hurt them if we just sit here and do nothing! You are the only one that reach the ship in time before they get to Homeworld!
  • Lapis: If they lay a single hand on him... Peridot come with me. I would need you to help me in case if they do get to Homeworld.
  • Peridot: Right!
Shifting Narratives - Part One

“Avengers Assemble! We have a case” Garcia’s voice came across the bullpen closely followed by a collective groan. It was 4pm on a Friday and everyone had been hoping for an early start to the weekend.

“Sorry guys” said Emily as the team traipsed into the briefing room “This one is time sensitive. Who remembers the Harrison Michael Taylor case?”

“That was about seven years ago right?” said Luke “He abducted and killed a number of teenage girls?”

“Correct Newbie. Eight in total over ten years. He was arrested in 2010 along with his girlfriend Connie Georgette. Taylor confessed  but there was a huge question mark over the extent of Connie’s involvement. She has always refused to talk about the murders and didn’t defend herself at trial despite pleading not guilty.”

“She was seen with victim number six about four hours before her death” explained JJ “Plus the house they both shared was filled with trophies from not only their kills but a number of other girls that Harrison had stalked over the years” added Emily.

“But Harrison claimed he committed all the murders on his own right?” Rossi jumped in “Claimed that Connie was completely unaware”

“Yeah except there was no way that she didn’t at least know what was going on” said Emily. Her eyes flicked round the table before settling on Spencer who hadn’t spoken, hadn’t even looked up since they had started. Emily felt something twist in her stomach before Tara’s voice brought her back to the discussion.

“Why are we being called in now?”

“There have been a number of…developments”

“Sounds intriguing” quipped Rossi.

“That’s a massive understatement” said Garcia

“First of all a documentary filmmaker, Y/N, has been working on a film about the case and during several interviews Harrison has implied that there were more than just the eight victims” explained Emily.

“Isn’t Y/N the one who made that series about the guy falsely imprisoned for murder?” asked JJ.

“Yes!” Garcia’s face lit up ‘It was an indie series, she started working on it in her final year of film school and then she got tonnes of funding, it streamed online and became this sleeper hit. Seriously I watched the entire thing on my day off, bathroom breaks only”

“Aren’t you surrounded by that stuff everyday? I mean you’re the Queen of Kitten videos so why binge something like that?” asked Luke.

“Because Newbie the entire thing was super uplifting. That kid, Jake Mahoney was sent to prison when he was sixteen. No one believed him except Y/N, they were school friends. Can you imagine what that does to a person?”

The temperature in the room seemed to drop in an instant. Garcia’s eyes widened as she realised. Six pairs of eyes swivelled round to Spencer who didn’t so much as flinch, he just kept his eyes fixed on the file though it was clear he wasn’t reading.

“What else was there?” said Rossi after a few moments of awkward silence “You said there were a number of complications”

“Yes” said Emily “Recently Connie got a new lawyer who is arguing that she was coerced into helping Harrison. Connie came from an abusive home and had a history of being taken advantage of by domineering and violent men.”

“The case is being re-examined” explained Garcia.

“They want us to see if there is any credibility to either of these new theories” said Emily “Harrison is refusing to speak with us unless Y/N is allowed to keep making her film and Connie has only agreed to see her lawyer, her mother and just recently Y/N since she was incarcerated. It’s not going to be easy.”

“Is this filmmaker going to make things difficult for us?” asked Rossi.

“She’s a crusader for truth!” said Garcia “You know the whole protector of the weak, fighting for those who can’t fight for themselves schtick. I follow her on Twitter, she’s crazy passionate about this”

“Bet the publicity doesn’t help either” said JJ

“Get yourselves ready, wheels up in forty. Spencer can I talk to you a sec?”

Spencer kept his face blank as the rest of the team filed out after a moment’s hesitation. Emily didn’t speak until they were alone.

“I got a call from Cruz, you missed your last appointment with the therapist” she said flatly.

“I…lost track of time. I’ll make it up next week” said Spencer. Emily fixed him with a look of disbelief.

“Spencer I don’t need to tell you how important those sessions are and not just because they’re a condition of your probation-”

“I know” snapped Spencer “It was a one time mistake. It’s not going to happen again”

“You have six months left until your evaluation. Cruz and I had to fight to get you reinstated” said Emily, her voice rising “I know you have been through something horrific but for God’s sake Spencer…”

Spencer knew deep down that she was right. That didn’t mean he was happy about it. He thought when they cleared his name it was over, that after they rescued his mother that things could finally get back to normal but he’d still broken bureau protocol and apparently the higher ups no longer “trusted his judgement”. Fourteen years at the FBI and he’s gone from the golden boy to a screw up in a few months.

“There’s something else” added Emily, with a note of hesitancy “Obviously Harrison is in prison and that’s where we’re interviewing him so it’s probably best if you sit this one out”

“What?” Spencer leapt to his feet “You can’t do that!”

“I am not sending you back inside a prison. That’s final”

“What the hell am I supposed to do here?”

“Rearrange you’re therapy session for starters, there’s paperwork and we have requests for overviews and profiles from a number of-”

“No” said Spencer “Just-no I’m not staying here. I am a part of this team and I’m coming with you even if I can’t go into the prison”.

Emily was silent for a long time. She felt conflicted. On the one hand she didn’t want risk Spencer’s well being but on the other hand it wouldn’t be much better if he was isolated from the team.

“Okay” she said finally “You can come but you stay at the police station, we’re liaising with the locals in the case of more bodies.”

“Thank you” said Spencer as the tension left his body.

“Don’t thank me till this is over” warned Emily

The filmmaker life was far less glamorous that most people would believe. You had spent about half your time living out of your van in the midst of second hand recording equipment and multi-packs of energy drinks. Thankfully a grant from an arts charity meant that for the last month you had been able to stay in a cheap motel about half an hour away from the prison.

Today was going to be tough. Truth be told, Harrison’s ultimatum to the FBI made you uncomfortable  for several reasons. Firstly, you didn’t want anyone to assume you were an ally of Harrison’s, that you were somehow deluded enough to think he was innocent or, even worse, that you condoned his crimes. You were interested in what drove him to do those things, what helped him evade capture for so long and, if you were honest, what was the mindset of a man who knew he was going to die in prison.

As you drove up to the police station your mind turned to Connie - the reason you got involved in all of this in the first place. After seeing your documentary about Jake, Connie’s mother had sent you an email. Gillian was convinced of her daughter’s innocence and she wanted you to help Connie like you helped Jake. You explained that it was easier said than done but that you would look into it at the very least but here you were all this time later, ready to meet an elite team from the FBI. 

This wasn’t going to be fun. You had no doubt that the FBI wasn’t interested in working with an outsider, a suspicion that was partially confirmed when you met the team.

“SSA Prentiss” the woman in charge stuck out her hand after Captain Nelson had introduced you.

“Y/N” you answered as you shook her hand “I’ve been reading up about the BAU, you guys do some seriously impressive work”

“These are agents Jareau, Rossi, Alvez and Doctors Lewis and Reid” said Prentiss, indicating each member in turn “Since it’s late we’re going to spend tonight getting up to date with the case and what your impressions of Mr Taylor and Ms Georgette are from your interviews”

“I’m not a profiler”

“No” said the woman introduced as Dr Lewis “But you clearly understand people and you’ve spent a lot of time talking to Mr Taylor”

“He’s spent a lot of time performing for me” you clarified, and you saw a smile tug at the corner of Dr Lewis’ lips “I want to make it clear from where I’m standing he’s guilty as hell and he’s a danger to anyone who comes in contact”

“Good to hear” said Prentiss “Tell us everything you know”

Tagging: @teatimewithtiya @cherry-loves-fanfic @rachficrecs @frickin-bats @http-natiii @milkandcookies528 @criminal-navy-writings @reiding-and-writing@remember-me-forever-silent-angel  @brooke0297

gemcrust  asked:

Don't get me wrong i'm pro sapphy and ruby for life, but an episode with them apart would be nice, just to get to know them individually, see how they feel & interact with pearl and amethyst connie and greg.

I agree with that, wholeheartedly.

darkangelonthemoon  asked:

Howdy. How about Stevonnie wedding day chaos?

I’m so bad at aging up characters lol. But this was a bit silly and a bit fun to write, so I hope you enjoy it!

“Steven?” Pearl banged on the door, her voice climbing in pitch with anxiety. “Steven, we have to go! We’re going to be late!”

“No one’s on time to a wedding, Pearl, chill,” Amethyst said. Pearl glared at her.

“Amethyst, I don’t think you’re taking this seriously enough. This is one of the most important days in Steven’s life and you’re not even dressed.” Amethyst rolled her eyes. She glowed purple for a moment and was abruptly wearing a purple and white suit.

“Happy now?” she asked, plucking at her cuffs and grinning. Pearl ignored her and pounded on the bathroom door again.

“Steven?” she called. “Are you almost—?” The door flew open.

“I’m ready,” Steven gasped. His bowtie was askew. Pearl reached out and adjusted it for him.

“Alright,” she said. “Greg is here with the van. Garnet and the rest are meeting us at the church.” She paused, her hands flat against Steven’s lapel, and tears brimmed in her eyes. “You look so handsome,” she said. “I can’t believe you’re already—” She pressed a hand against her mouth. Steven smiled.

“Pea-arl,” he groaned. “You don’t need to cry. I’m not going anywhere. Connie’s practically just as much a Crystal Gem as all the rest of us. We’ll still be going on missions with you guys, curing corrupted gems and all that stuff.” Pearl gave a watery smile.

“I know,” she said. A horn honked outside and she jumped. “Go, go, go,” she said, shoving at him. “Come on, Amethyst.”


Outside the elegant marble reception hall, Dr. Priyanka Maheswaran nervously checked her watch. “You don’t think they’re going to be late, do you?” she asked her husband. “It’s Steven’s wedding day, after all, you’d think he’d find punctuality important.” Doug laid a comforting hand on her arm.

“Don’t worry, dear,” he said. “It’s not like the ceremony will start without them.”

“Is Steven here yet?” Connie asked, hurrying up to them. She had the skirt of her wedding dress bunched up and slung over her arm so she could run more easily. Her feet were bare, her high heels dangling out of her free hand. Dr. Maheswaran yelped and pulled the skirt back down, smoothing it with her hands.

“Connie,” she scolded, “you’ll wrinkle it! And put your shoes on! You’re getting married.” Connie rolled her eyes.

“You cared about doing this in a white dress a whole lot more than I ever did, Mom,” she said, but she set the shoes on the ground and stepped into them. As she did, the door swung open, and all three Maheswarans straightened up, looking for Steven. Instead, Lars and Sadie walked through the door, followed by a number of gems. Connie squealed and ran forward.

“Lars!” she said, hugging him. “I haven’t seen you in forever. How’s the Big Donut these days?” He laughed, hugging her back.

“I only stop in occasionally. Rhodonite mostly runs it these days.” Rhodonite waved from behind him, her lower pair of arms pressing her hands together nervously.

“Human food is quite delicious,” she said. “And people always look so happy when they eat donuts.” Next to her waist, Padparadscha gasped.

“I predict Connie will look absolutely beautiful in her wedding dress!” she cried. Connie smiled.

“Thank you, Pad,” she said. She glanced over at her parents. Her mother had gone pale. Lars and Sadie stepped up. Sadie offered her hand.

“Hi,” she said, “I’m Sadie, and this is Lars. Behind us is Rhodonite, Padparadscha – but you can just call her Pad – the Rutile twins, and Fluorite.” Fluorite was having some trouble squeezing through the door, each segment of her body pulling laboriously through the doorframe. Dr. Maheswaran shook Sadie’s hand numbly. Her eyes went to Lars.

“Pink to meet you – I mean,” she said, flushing, “pleasure to meet you. Steven’s mentioned you before.” Lars blew at the curl of pink hair hanging down over his face, briefly revealing the long dark scar that ran across his eye.

“Pleasure to meet you too,” he said. “Steven’s our friend because we used to sell him donuts.”

“Steven’s our friend because Steven’s friends with everyone,” Sadie said. That, at least, drew a faint groaning attempt at a laugh from Dr. Maheswaran.

“Hey, Mom, why don’t you go check that Garnet and Lapis and Peridot found their seats okay?” Connie asked forcefully. Her mother nodded and walked stiffly into the hall. Connie smiled apologetically at Lars. “She’s still a bit… unfamiliar with all the gem stuff,” she said. Lars shrugged.

“I get stares a lot. I’m used to it.” Sadie whacked his arm.

“Don’t be rude,” she said. She beamed at Connie. “You look so gorgeous,” she said. “We’re so happy for you and Steven.” Connie blushed. She felt like she’d done that more today than she had her entire life.

“Aw, thanks Sadie,” she said. She gestured toward the door into the hall. “We’ve got a space set up for Fluorite and everything in there. Just ask Jenny, she’ll show you where to go.” Lars tipped her a mock salute.

“Thanks,” he said.

“I predict Connie’s mother will think all of us are very strange beings,” Padparadscha announced.

“Come along, now, Pad,” Fluorite said, her deep gentle voice rumbling in the echoes of the hall. “Let’s find our seats.”


There had been a lengthy debate about who should conduct the actual ceremony of the wedding. Gems didn’t have weddings and Greg solidly opted out, saying he’d spend the entire time crying. None of the Maheswaran family friends were people Steven or Connie felt particularly close to.

Pearl’s girlfriend Shannon volunteering had been a bit of a surprise, but Steven and Connie had both looked at each other, shrugged, and agreed she was a fine option. She was dressed in a flowing pink dress for the occasion, her matching hair braided down her head. She didn’t have to do that much: Steven and Connie had written their own vows. Lion brought their rings on a cushion. Their eyes met as Connie slid a ring onto Steven’s finger and they both grinned. Steven felt his gem glowing softly.

“Don’t fuse yet,” Connie scolded under her breath. “Mom will never forgive me.”

“I know,” Steven chuckled. “For the party, though.”

“Definitely for the party,” Connie agreed.


The beach was bursting with light and color. Greg had been cajoled into bringing out his guitar and playing some live music before they turned it over to Sour Cream to DJ. Lapis had stood hesitantly at the edge until Steven grabbed her hand and pulled her into the crowd to dance. Peridot kept tripping over her own feet, but with great enthusiasm. Lars hesitantly took Sadie’s hand and they swayed slowly together in a corner. Humans and gems whirled.

Gems dancing proved to be chaos as they fused and unfused with abandon. One moment Opal leapt above the crowd, the next Amethyst was alone, popping and locking to the beat as Pearl spun into Garnet’s arms, and suddenly Sardonyx appeared, chuckling loudly. Fluorite, smiling gently, suddenly came apart into three separate fusions. Steven paused, staring wide-eyed as they dispersed into the crowd and grabbed partners, laughing giddily.

Steven grabbed Connie’s hand and they spun and spun until there was only one pair of feet in the sand. Stevonnie laughed, their hair loose around their shoulders, a shortened white skirt flowing down from the white shirt and pink bowtie. They kicked off their shoes and ran barefoot across the sand, hiking their skirt up to splash through the shallow waves at the edge of the water. They dropped to sit in the sand, staring across the waves.

“I’ve never been happier,” they said, their face flushed, sand squishing between their toes.

“That makes two of us,” they responded to themselves, and they laughed. “Two in one, forever and ever.”

Send me prompts!

Okay but I am seriously DYING for an episode that explores gender. Seriously.

Like, okay. What if we start out with Lars coming out as a trans guy? It would be best if it happens on purpose, maybe to the cool kids or something, some small group. Steven sees, and it gets Steven thinking about his own gender. He’s never really questioned it before, but now he’s wondering about how he’s part Rose (who he thinks is a woman) and such. So he goes to Garnet and sorta vents his confusion a bit. Garnet is surprised that Steven thinks Rose was a woman, and explains that gems are genderless. Amethyst shows up partway through and laughs about earth gender, talking about her wrestling persona and how she thought it was funny humans mistook her for a man, when “Clearly I’m *not*, why would I have to stick to silly human concepts like that!” Then Pearl and Connie come in, having just finished training. Once they understand the conversation, Pearl asks Connie for more details about the human concept of gender, since Connie is the only one there with a “normal” human upbringing. Connie explains and then complains about how ridiculous the whole concept is in the first place. She really seems very passionate about the subject, so Steven asks her if it’s been bothering her for a long time. After a bit of nervous nail-biting, Connie admits that she’s never really felt like a girl, but never had a way to explain it. She shyly admits that being part of Stevonnie is the closest she’s gotten to being comfortable with her body and pronouns (she felt their heart skip the first time someone called Stevonnie “they”). Garnet gives Connie a hug and asks, kindly, if she’d like for the gems to call Connie “they” pronouns for a while. Connie agrees, relieved and happy. Pearl asks if Connie enjoyed the flatter chest that Stevonnie has, Connie says they did. Pearl offers to find her some workout clothes that will flatten her chest more during practice without restricting their movements too much. Amethyst cheers for Connie and says if anyone has an issue with their gender/lack of gender, the Purple Puma will have something to say about it. Steven watches all this in awe, taking a little more time to comprehend everything just cuz this is all really new to him. He tells Connie he’ll do his best to understand and respect them while they work themself out, and says that if they ever want to fuse into Stevonnie again to help with dysphoria, he’ll be happy to help. Connie happy-cries and gets hugs from everyone. They aren’t brave enough to come out to their parents yet, but for now, they have a group of supportive friends to help them while they explore their gender freely for the first time. The episode closes with Steven saying Connie should ask Lars where he gets his binders.

commission fic #2: staying in

next commission fic is for @cooper-klebba, who requested grown up connverse pregnancy fluff. this got a little deeper than you might be expecting as I thought more about what it would mean to these two to be parents, but I also laughed more while writing this than anything else out of the week’s batch.

“So here’s the thing,” Connie says to the assembled Crystal Gems, two hands in the small of her back and the latest floor plan for the addition in which the newest addition to the family will live rolled up under her arm, “my mom says I shouldn’t come on any more missions until after the baby is born. And even if she’s not actually our doctor, I have to admit she probably knows what she’s talking about.” Connie’s been a live-in member of the team since she finished up her Master’s degree and popped the question to Steven the day after graduation without surprising anyone, without fuss, and pointedly without diamonds (he still cried when he said yes). Now that they’re both in their early thirties (and almost looking it, in Steven’s case) excitement for a first grandchild has been high on the human side of the family for a while now. On the gem side, the attitude is more along the lines of…open-mindedness.

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My another favourite Reibert moment in SNK PS4 cutscenes

Scene title: Idiot

Jean: I feel that teaming up with the suicidal bastard shortens my life.

Eren: Who are you talking about !?

Jean: Whoever came up in your mind.

Connie: ……….?

Bert: You really never get tired of this…

Ymir: Instead of that person, Jean prefers to team with lovely Mikasa, right?

Jean: Huh?! Shut up!

Connie: Hey Jean? I don’t think there is anyone called “the suicidal bastard” ?

Jean: …You shut up too, Connie…

Ymir: Agree. We were right in the fun part…just keep your mouth shut you idiot.

Jean: But I’m exhausted…if we have to team up anyway, it would be good to have someone reliable at a pinch.

Eren: …I do agree with that.

Bert: (excited) That’s right! For example, Reiner!

Ymir: Huh, even now Mr. Somebody keeps sticking to Reiner, doesn’t he?

Bert: …? Who?

Connie: ……..?

Ymir: God knows.

Connie: Hey Jean? I don’t think there is anyone called “Mr. Somebody” ?

Jean: …..Forget it, Connie…

Thank you for the one who uploaded this to Youtube.

And sorry for my bad English again.

Rp Summary: You wouldn’t pirate a federal agent’s ID badge

Characters: Fratelli, Dispatch, Monarch, Connie

Content warnings: none i think?? 

Summary: Fratelli, Dispatch and Monarch plan to sneak into Silvain’s apartment and steal their ID badge while they’re out on their morning run.  Monarch remains outside as a lookout while Fratelli and Dispatch break in.  Unfortunately, they wake Connie in the process, who threatens to shoot Fratelli with his bow and demands to know what they’re doing there.  Dispatch diffuses the situation and Connie agrees to send the ID card along with Robyn Hood to keep an eye on it, so the group leaves empty handed, but also arrow-free. 


Eremika AU Week (Day 2, Crossover/ Day 3, Mythology)

Title: Kids of War And Salt

Pairing: Eremika

Syn: Eren Jaeger is the newbie son of Ares, and a fine piece of War God ass. Mikasa Ackerman is the experienced daughter of Athena, and she does not want to admit that this fine piece of War God ass is, indeed, fine. Some dirty tricks in a crazy game of Capture The Flag may change that. (Percy Jackson AU)

He’s kinda hot, isn’t he?”

Sasha Braus, daughter of Demeter, played with the bitten apple in her hand, drying it and making it juicier at will. Mikasa Ackerman, daughter of Athena, looked up from the ant bites on her calf.

“Who?” she asked.

Sasha took a bite of her apple, wiping her messy mouth with her forearm before pointing towards the Ares cabin. “New guy over there. The one who got claimed last night.”

Mikasa squinted against the sun. “Eren Jaeger?”

“Yeah, him. I’d tap it.” The apple dried out again. Sasha set it down into the grass, where it decomposed immediately.

“Hmm,” her companion replied, glancing at the boy. Her gaze soon flicked to the strawberry fields.

“'Hmm’?” Sasha repeated. “What’s that supposed to mean? The kid’s a hunk of fine ass, in my humble opinion.”

“Cheating on me, Sash?” Connie Springer, son of Hermes, took a seat next to Sasha. “And with that loser? The guy can’t even win a fight against Annie.”

“That’s unfair,” Sasha said. “Mortal or not, Annie could probably beat the shit out of Zeus himself.”

“True, true,” Connie agreed.

“Don’t talk about Zeus like that,” Mikasa muttered. “You know he’s listening.”

“Bullshit,” came another voice. The three looked up as Jean Kirschtein, son of Zeus himself, plopped down into the grass beside them. “That old man doesn’t even listen when you’re talking straight to his face. All that ‘the gods are watching’ shit may be true with some gods, like Dionysus and Hera, but it sure as shit doesn’t apply to Thunderbolt up there. Anyway, what’re we looking at here?”

“Eren Jaeger’s fine ass,” Sasha answered.

Jean snorted. “If you count being a fuckup in every possible way as 'fine’, then sure, pothead. Can’t believe you guys thought he was my brother.”

“You’re both hella angry,” Connie reminded him.

“And mean-looking,” Sasha added.

“And he’s stubborn, like your dad,” Mikasa said.

Jean scoffed. “What, do you know him? Did you guys start dating or something?”

Mikasa rolled her eyes. “He got here, like, a week ago. Please. I’ve just seen him get into a ton of arguments with Erwin.”

“You’d make a hot couple,” Sasha said, smirking.

Mikasa stood. “Thanks, but no thanks.”

“Where you going?” Connie asked.

“Back to my cabin. Armin needed some help with designing our strategy for the capture the flag tonight.”

“Have fun trying to outwit me, Niece,” Jean laughed.

“We’re driving your ass into the ground, thunderhead,” Mikasa returned.

“Is that a fact?”

“Damn straight it is.”

Armin Arlert, son of Athena, was not where his sister thought he’d be.

Mikasa knew for a fact that Armin was terrified by the Ares kids. The grotesque boar’s head above their door, their loud, chaotic music blasting all hours of the day, how they picked fights with anyone and everyone- she knew how it unsettled him, and she knew that, since he’d arrived at Camp Half-Blood, he’d been afraid of falling victim to one of their brutal attacks.

This is why, when she was told Armin had gone to the Ares cabin when he was supposed to be sitting at his desk waiting for her, Mikasa assumed the worst, grabbed her dagger, and marched toward that nasty boar’s head, a bone-chilling glint in her eye.

Dozens of kids knowingly scrambled out of her path, from the tiny newbies to the muscular, shaven-headed old-timers.

“Where’s my brother?” Mikasa asked sharply, dagger in hand.

“Th-the new kid’s got him….” someone answered shakily.



“Where is he?” The dagger rose.

“The arena. Please don’t hurt me.”

Mikasa raised an eyebrow. “You guys on our side tonight?”

“Yeah,” the cabin answered, fear in their voices. Mikasa sheathed her dagger, the storm in her eyes calming at last.

“Then you’re safe for now. Get rest and nutrition. If we lose, it’s on your asses.”

“Yes, ma'am,” they chorused.

Mikasa nodded and marched out, wondering how stupid this new kid was to try and pull shit like this. If Armin had a single scratch on him, she swore to the gods, Eren Jaeger would not be able to play that night. At least his siblings had had enough sense to tell her where he’d gone.

The arena. She gritted her teeth. Probably beating the shit out of him, then.

He’d get his share soon enough.

Once again, campers dutifully got their asses out of there once they caught sight of the legendary Mikasa Ackerman and her paralyzing death glare (and her sharp, sharp dagger).

She scanned the arena, stopping once she caught sight of Armin’s unmistakable blond halo. He was lying on the ground. Eren Jaeger stood above him, the tip of his sword pressed against Armin’s chest.

Without a thought, Mikasa jumped the bastard, pressing the edge of her dagger against his throat as he fell to the floor.

“What the fuck?!” he sputtered.

“Keep your grungy war claws off my brother,” she snarled in reply. “If I ever see a scene like that again, your ass is going to be mounted on the side of my bunk. Got it, Jaeger?”

“Mikasa, wait, wait!” Armin objected, standing. “He was just training me. I wasn’t in any danger, I promise.”

She paused. Looked at Eren Jaeger.

“It’s true.”

He said that with eyebrows raised, still bewildered.

“You’ve only been here a week,” was all she could think to say.

He rolled his eyes. “I’ve been training in martial arts since I was five, dude.”

Reluctantly, Mikasa removed her dagger from his throat and stood, offering him a hand.

“I thought Ares kids scared you, Armin,” she said as Eren grunted, pulling himself up.

He shrugged. “I met him before he was claimed.”

“What a lucky thing you did,” Eren said, grinning. “For your first time, you’re doing pretty okay, my friend. You’ll need to do some outside training, to get stronger and whatever, but you’ve got the technique down.”

Armin grinned right back. “Thanks for doing this, Eren,” he said. “And by the way, this is Mikasa. She’s an Athena kid, too.”

Eren squinted, rubbing his chin. “Would’ve pegged you as an Artemis girl.”

Mikasa made a face. “Lady Artemis can’t have kids,” she reminded him.

Eren’s ears turned pink. “Oh, yeah. But you’re just so, like, strong. I guess.”

“Well, Athena is a war goddess, but thanks for noticing anyway,” she replied, sheathing her dagger once again. “That should work in your favor, seeing as I’m your captain tonight.”

Eren blinked. “….Captain?”

“For capture the flag,” Armin clarified. “Has no one told you?”

His face lit up. “Oh, I know capture the flag. But we’re playing it tonight? Why did no one tell me?”

“They were probably going to prank you,” Mikasa answered. “They do it with all of their newbies. Leave them alone in the cabin, and then 'kidnap’ them, taking them to the arena in the middle of the night to fight the leaders. They get their ass kicked. Their siblings laugh. Then they’re officially a member of their cabin.”

Eren placed an astonished hand on his chest. “Well, then…..damn. Thanks for the warning, I guess.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Armin sighed. “But if they all go back to get Eren….no, wait. They’ll split up. Still, that’s a heavy loss for our team. Who else do we have so far?”

“Apollo, Dionysus, Nemesis, Poseidon, and Hades.”

“Ugh,” he muttered, frowning. “We couldn’t get Demeter? Or Hermes? Nyx?”

“Nope. Everyone’s siding with Jean and Reiner.”

“Well, we at least have Poseidon, Nemesis, and Hades. Not that I believe Bertholdt’s going to show off anytime soon, but Isabel, at least, will. And we could use some power over the creek. Besides that, since we’ve got Levi, we should…….oh. Oh, hold on. Armin’s getting an idea.”

Mikasa couldn’t help but snort. “Mind sharing with your captain?”

“Sure…..let’s go to the cabin, first. And Eren?”

Eren blinked, completely lost. “Um, yeah?” he replied.

Armin raised an eyebrow. “How good of an actor are you?”

Eren shifted nervously, his wrists aching and itching against the rope and the bark both. Damn, why’d he have to be so heavy?

And Hades, his siblings were loud. And annoying. Eren was beginning to hope Ares had made a mistake, and he was Zeus’s kid after all. There were only, like, five kids in that whole cabin. Meanwhile, Ares apparently couldn’t keep his War Rod in his pants.

And all of these kids he’d produced were pissed that Eren’s new friends had foiled their plans.

“You’re a snitch,” one of them growled.

“A bitch,” someone else added, elbowing Eren in the side. He winced.

“We should leave you here for the demons.”

Everyone shouted in agreement.

“Don’t you guys want to win?” Eren asked. “Like, if you leave me, the plan goes to shit.”

Someone slapped him upside the head. “Fuck you. Hiding behind Athena kids like a bitch. Can’t believe you’re an Ares kid.”


Eren exhaled in relief. That meant they knew he was right. He would be okay.

Footsteps sounded in the distance. Eren’s siblings grew much, much louder. Spearheads and swords and clubs prodded and smacked him all over.

“Over there!” someone yelled. Eren’s shoe was torn from his foot.

“Fight us, kid!” his siblings shouted. “You coward!”

There was rustling ahead. The footsteps stopped. The blue team stared the Ares cabin in the eye.

The Ares kids raised their weapons, ready to fight. Eren tried his best to bite back a smirk, instead opting to look terrified and pathetic.

“Tormenting your own brother?” Ymir, daughter of Hermes, asked, squinting against the dark at Eren. “During the game?”

That’s right, Eren thought. Take your time. Strike up a conversation. You’re practically handing us the flag.

“No,” answered one of his siblings.

Eren stiffened. Wait, what?

“Honestly, we were trying to draw you guys over here so your forces would be weakened back at your flag,” he continued. “The Hades, Athena, and Poseidon cabins are all on their way right now.”

“What are you doing?!” Eren exclaimed. “You’re giving the entire plan away!”

“Is that so?” Ymir asked, smirking. “Why tell us, though?”

The boy grinned. “We’re switching over. Ackerman disrupted our initiation ceremony. It’s payback time.”

“Krista and Connie, run back and tell Reiner,” Ymir said. “Glad to have you aboard. You gonna let the newbie down now?”

Eren prayed to Zeus, squeezing his eyes tight.

Make them say yes, Zeus, show up and make them say yes, Zeus, they told me demons live out here, Zeus, please

“No way. The runt’s still gotta pass initiation.”

Eren squirmed furiously against the ropes holding him to the branch. “Oh, come on! This is some bullshit!”

“Don’t be so upset, Eren,” Ymir grinned. “You should be fine, so long as none of the venomous ones find you.”

“The- the what?”

The entire crowd, traitors and enemies alike, laughed as Eren went pale. Then they left, save for a few who lingered behind to cut up their newest brother, smacking him with their club like a pinata and stealing his other shoe, slashing at his calf.

“I’d say the monsters are gonna smell you and come over,” one of them said, “but you smell like ass, so I wouldn’t worry.”

He and the others chortled and followed after their team. Eren struggled against the ropes again, but damn, those kids could tie a knot.

Also, everything hurt.

Eren waited for a long, long time. His cuts stopped bleeding, clotting up and scabbing over. He began to shake uncontrollably, the night’s chill soaking into his bones. He was sure his hands would detach from his wrists any second now.

And then, when he was sure he couldn’t be any more miserable, he heard hissing.

Loud hissing.

Something extremely thick and smooth curled around his ankle. He yelped and yanked his leg away, his wrists burning with the movement. The thing found his leg again, sliding upward now, this time even quicker.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, ohhh sHIT!!” he sang, his stomach lurching. How was this okay? How was this a game of capture the flag? How the fuck did anyone expect him to survive this?

The thing stopped moving. A brief moment passed where Eren wondered what it was doing, but it was soon interrupted by the sensation of two hot, sharp daggers digging into his thigh. He screamed.

“Eren!” someone shouted in the distance. Leaves rustled. Branches snapped. Someone was breathing heavily.

Armin burst from the bushes, panting, his entire face bright red. He stiffened at the sight of the monster on Eren’s leg, and then rushed to remove it.

“Oh my gods, Armin,” Eren gasped, crying, “ohhh fuck this hurts so fucking much, oh my gods, I’m dead.”

“Hold….still,” Armin panted, gripping the thing’s head. The was a sickening crack. The monster turned to sand.

“Py…thon……he’s….grouchy….hungry…..not venomous……you’re fine…..except the blood….I’ll help you down.”

And he did. Eren’s wrists began to swell, his hands all pins and needles. “Where’s Mikasa?” he asked.

“I’ll…find her….you……use your shirt…..stop the bleeding…….be back….” Armin managed.

As he jogged away, his entire body sagging and sweating, Eren did as he was told and removed his shirt, tying it tightly around his thigh.

Now what? he asked himself. Staying in the forest didn’t seem all that safe, anymore. He had no weapons; he couldn’t just go back into the game. And Armin was already looking for Mikasa.

Just as he took a seat in the crook of the nearest tree, he heard more rustling and snapping.

He looked up. It was Mikasa.

“Mikasa!” he shouted. “There you are. Armin left a minute ago to look for you. Is everything okay?”

She squinted at him. “Damn,” she muttered. “Sasha was right. You’re a fine piece of ass, Eren Jaeger.”

His face heated. “Uh- what?”

Mikasa smiled. “You know,” she said in a lilting voice, “I know this is all a hallucination, right? Must mean I really would tap that, then. But this is not bad at all, actually. Thanks to Dionysus and his merry, generous children.” She blew a kiss to the sky. “I could’ve had night terrors, but they gave me you, shirtless. I thank them.”

Eren frowned, bewildered. “Are you…..drunk? High? Low blood sugar?”

Mikasa didn’t answer, instead reaching up to twirl a strand of his hair around her finger. “You sure you’re not Aphrodite’s kid?” she asked him.

Eren stepped back. “You said thanks to Dionysus. Who is he, again? The…..the….wine god! Drunkenness, madness. That shit. Look, Mikasa, you’re not hallucinating, you’re drunk.”

She laughed and, to Eren’s utter shock, leaned in and kissed him, grabbing his jaw and tangling her fingers in his hair.

“I’m not drunk, soldier boy,” she giggled. “I’m definitely hallucinating. I mean, I saw Armin running. He does not run. He just doesn’t.”

Eren was speechless. Carefully, he removed her hands from his head, stepping back.

“Oh, what, you didn’t like it?” Mikasa asked, seeming genuinely hurt. “I tried my best, I did, but I-”

Out of pity, or maybe attraction, or guilt, or some sick combination of the three, Eren kissed her again. She grinned.

“I liked it,” he told her, and he was a little surprised by the honesty in his words. “But right now, we need to find Armin. Can you run?”

“Bitch, I came out of Athena’s head runnin’. I was like, nyooooooommm. She was like, 'Damn! Das my girl!'”

“I’m going to go with no, then,” Eren sighed. He scooped her up, holding her bridal-style. Then, shoeless and bleeding, he tried his best to run towards the creek, Mikasa heavy and giggling in his arms.

“You’re a prince,” she chuckled, stroking his face. Eren tried his best not to laugh, mostly because he was running and needed all the air he could get, but also because he knew how embarrassed she would be when she snapped out of it.

As he neared the creek (or as least he thought was near it), the conch was sounded. Eren groaned and headed towards it.

Mikasa stiffened. “That was the Minotaur, Eren. Oh my gods.”

“The Minotaur makes horn sounds?” Eren asked, incredulous.

“Yeah…..oh my gods, I’m tired, Eren. Can I go to sleep?”

“Sure thing.”

“Can I get a good-night kiss?”

“Do you really like me all that much?”

Mikasa burst into laughter.

“You’re just so nice,” she sighed once she was done. “And pretty. And you’re a good kisser.”


“No problem-o, Eren-o!”

She laughed again, loudly, because she was so sure she was hilarious.

And it just added to his exhaustion.

When Eren finally met up with the other campers, he gently set Mikasa down, and then collapsed. Marco, son of Apollo, assured everyone he wasn’t dead, and then continued to carry him away.

Ambrosia and nectar were delicious, Eren found the next morning. Too bad an overdose was deadly.

As soon as he’d been given the clear to leave the infirmary, he made a beeline for the Athena cabin, not even stopping by his own place first (he didn’t want to see the other Ares kids’ ugly faces, anyway).

Armin lay on a bottom bunk, staring upward, a glazed look in his eyes.

“…..Armin?” Eren said.

“I’m never running again,” Armin whispered. “Eren, I can’t move. I can’t move my body, Eren. I might as well be dead.”

“Do you want me to call Erwin over here, or…..?”

“No, no,” he sighed. “Ambrosia and nectar really will kill me. And I can’t let Erwin see me like this. He thinks I’m a talented camper. And he’s a centaur, and centaurs are so magical, Eren. I can’t let a centaur, let alone Erwin, see me so pathetic and sore. Also, Mikasa’s up there. If you see Annie, the Oracle girl, tell her our day is canceled. She can come over here, by the way. She knows I’m a dandelion.”

Eren snorted and patted Armin’s shoulder. “I’m sure you’ll live,” he assured him, climbing up to Mikasa’s bunk.

He took a seat next to the ladder. Mikasa was awake, as well, also staring upward with a glazed look in her eyes.

After a moment, she frowned. “Did we-”

“You kissed me, then I kissed you,” Eren told her.

“What did I say to you?”

Her face was turning red, her palms becoming clammy.

“You just talked about how good-looking I was, and how you’d tap that. Nothing really weird.”

“Oh, my gods. Dearest mother Athena,” she exhaled, covering her face with a pillow. “I’m really sorry. The Dionysus kids put a spell on me, and I- ugh. Sorry about that.”

“No, it’s fine. I did enjoy it, if it helps any.”

“Yucky,” Armin muttered from below them.

“You stay out of my business, child,” Mikasa said. “And thanks. It does help a little, I think.”

The room became quiet. Eren glanced awkwardly at his wrists. Mikasa’s mind ran, hoping to find something to end the gods-awful silence before it became too uncomfortable.

Armin snickered, finally breaking it.

“I ship you two,” he said.

“I hope you end up in the Feilds Of Punishment,” Mikasa replied flatly.

“Only if you join me, dear sister of mine.”

Eren grinned. “We were the shittiest team to ever live,” he realized. “Did you guys even get close to the flag?”

“I actually had it,” Mikasa said. “Hence the spell. Jean’s team fights dirty. And we don’t suck, we just miscalculated. I didn’t think your brothers and sisters would be so……salty.”

“Runs in the family, I guess,” Eren replied. “I, too, am hella salty.”

“Oh, I’m sure Mikasa has a solid idea of what you taste like,” Armin smirked.

“Oh my gods, Armin.”

Skase prin ginoume kolo!”* Mikasa snapped.

Armin simply laughed. Eren hopped down from Mikasa’s bed and flicked him on the nose.

“You’re a little shit, you know that?”

“I’m a beloved son of Athena,” Armin corrected him, “And I am as brilliant as I am hilarious.”

“No you’re not,” said a girl’s voice by the door. By the time Eren looked, she was already gone.

Fila mou to kolo, Annie!”** Armin shouted after her.

“Feeling bold today,” Mikasa noted.

“I am so humiliated by our loss and the failure of my plan and my current immobility that I have lost the ability to care, Mikasa,” he said in response. “There are these things, Mikasa, these creatures, called fucks. And they are mine. And I do not give them.”

A/N: That’s it. We’re done, here. No more. This took me so fucking long to write, and it’s such shit, but you know what? There. The rest is up to your imagination. Did Eren rendezvous with Mikasa later for a makeout session? Did they end up fucking in the strawberry fields that night? Or did they forget the entire thing and slowly but surely grow to love each other and end up going out and being a new power couple? YOU DECIDE!!!

Also, though I headcanon that Armin rarely curses, and barely ever drops the F-bomb, I believe that in a PJO AU he’d have dealt w so much bullshit in his life that he wouldn’t care anymore.

Same with Mikasa, who is rather conservative by nature.


* “Shut up before I beat the shit out of you!”

**”Kiss my ass, Annie!”

*** Keikaku means plan