• Professor Poopypants: Okay class, ready for a pop quiz? Here's the first question: what is the seventh planet from the sun?
  • George and Harold: Uranus!
  • (George and Harold begin laughing hysterically.)
  • Professor Poopypants: No no, I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, the correct answer is GO TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE NOW!

Emma explaining Twitter to Woody Allen. (this is fantastic)


Conan O’ Brien’s 2011 Commencement Speech at Dartmouth College

There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized… Your path at 22 will not necessarily be your path at 32 or 42. One’s dream is constantly evolving, rising and falling, changing course… It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.”