compostible

This post reminded me of a story from my own family.

We moved to the house my parents still live in back in the summer of 1979. Sometime that summer, my oldest sister finished eating a peach, and buried the pit in the back yard.

My hometown is not known for its agriculture. The soil is sandy, thin, and acidic. We grow cranberries, pine trees, and weeds. I tried to grow a garden several summers running, and, even with a lovely compost heap to fertilize it, never got anything worth harvesting. Things did not grow in our back yard, unless they were sharp and thorny, or just plain stubborn.

So imagine my father’s surprise, as he’s cleaning up the yard after a hurricane in 1991, to find this fuzzy pink ball lying on the ground. And more of them hanging overhead. That peach pit, out of an ordinary supermarket peach, had sprouted, grown, blossomed, and borne fruit. Took it 12 years, but there it was, growing and fruiting in a tangle of brambles and pine trees.

My parents don’t bother harvesting the peaches nowadays. They tell me it’s far more entertaining, watching squirrels try to run carrying one. Or seeing the results after the fruit ferments, and the backyard wildlife gets soused.

one time my sister went to like a field trip thing at school to a farm and they were explaining like the dirt compost cycle or something and this guy comes out dressed like a half worm half obi kenobi and starts yelling ‘HELLO KIDS !!!! i am obi worm kenobi’ and i think abt that everyday

A method to Cleanse and Ward after unsavory people visit your house

Personally, I wait 15 minutes to ensure they haven’t forgotten anything (it’s a long, painful wait, I know. Just bear with it!) and then get straight to work!

First off;

If they ate or drank at your house:

  1. DO NOT save any leftovers from that meal, as it is now connected to them. Use it instead in the compost heap to help further along your garden.
  2. Rinse down the dishes they used with vinegar first, spritz with sage-infused water, then proceed to washing the dishes normally.

And now if they did not eat or drink at your house

  1. Open all doors and windows to air out the house.
  2. Light some incense (honestly any will do at this point your just trying to make sure their scent doesn’t linger)
  3. The couch or chair they were sitting on needs to be thoroughly vacuumed.
  4. After vacuuming the couch or chair, cast a consecrated circle around the object and banish their energy from it.
  5. Lightly mist with moonwater and place energized crystals in a spiral in said area.
  6. Dust the House.
  7. Sweep the floors and collect any trash, immediately taking it out.
  8. Wash down all tabletops and counter surfaces with vinegar.
  9. Wash the floors and walls with a mix of lavender/sage/moonwater.
  10. Vacuum the carpets and rugs.
  11. Smudge.
  12. Squeeze out some garlic juice from 3 cloves of garlic and rub into ground outside of door (3 cloves per door).
  13. Mix lemon juice with a drop of peppermint oil and use it to draw a line on the door frame, both sides; make sure you left no line breaks!
  14. Rub a touch of dogwood oil on the outside doorknob.
  15. Recharge your witch balls!
  16. Air out your dreamcatchers if you have any!

If they sat down on your bed

Ohhhhhh boy oh boy oh boy. Guess who’s about to wash their sheets?

Surprise it’s you!

  1. Wash your sheets.
  2. Wash your comforter.
  3. Wash the pillowcases.
  4. Wash the pillows.
  5. Wash the mattress pad.
  6. Vacuum the mattress.
  7. Mist lightly with moonwater.
  8. Place energized crystals where they sat in a spiral.

Optional; write their name on an egg, take it outside, and crush it beneath your heel.

Can be a curse or just an emotional outlet, either way; it feels pretty good.

“But what if I don’t have all those incenses and oils and moonwater???”

Silly, just air out your house and clean it top to bottom using regular cleaning supplies!

If it helps, you can also say the following;

Your body left my house, 
Now, your spirits can too.
And by ‘can’ I mean ‘will’,
It’s time for all of you to leave.

You’ve worn out your welcome,
When you never had any at all,
Out the door with you lot,
Away you go, away!

May you never return here!
May you never come back!
I banish you from this threshold!
Now get the fuck outta my house.”

No writing is wasted.
—  Did you know that sourdough from San Francisco is leavened partly by a bacteria called lactobacillus sanfrancisensis? It is native to the soil there and does not do well elsewhere. But any kitchen can become an ecosystem. If you bake a lot, your kitchen will become a happy home to wild yeasts, and all your bread will taste better. Even a failed loaf is not wasted. Likewise, cheesemakers wash the dairy floor with whey. Tomato gardeners compost with rotten tomatoes. No writing is wasted: the words you can’t put in your book can wash the floor, live in the soil, lurk around in the air. They will make the next words better. ― Erin Bow