complex situation

8

I would do about anything
I would even learn how to love

I’m just gonna say that ace discourse on this website is the final form of this weird “points” system most of y'all who interact with oppression on this website have. You try to quantify your oppression wrt your identities and completely disregard the intersections of, and personal interpretations with those identities. You believe that being a cishet ace gives you 1 Oppression Point over gay non-asexuals because you have this weird disconnect with the context of oppression. You want your identity and oppression to exist in a vacuum and you also want to quantify it in a way that is simply unrealistic.

Let’s start using positive labels.

Dyslexia

  • Creative
  • Great spatial awareness
  • Photographic memory
  • Always quick during a debate
  • Can oversee complex situations at a glance
  • Good at organising
  • Often great drawers
  • Has a lot of fantasy
  • Visual thinker

ADHD

  • Creative
  • Spontaneous
  • Highly empathic
  • Strong intuition
  • Great sense of humour
  • Good at finding solutions to problems
  • Quick thinker in crisis situations
  • Not angry for long
  • Energetic
  • Open
  • Driven and enthousiastic
  • Honest

Autism

  • Creative
  • Eye for detail
  • Honest
  • Realistic
  • Objective
  • Perfectionist
  • Analytical thinker
  • Always specific
  • Lives by rules
  • Great at deductive reasoning
  • Focused on facts

Kuelap, Peru - The Ancient Cloud Fortress of the Amazonas

The fortress of Kuelap is a walled city associated with the Chachapoyas culture built in 6th century AD. It consists of more than four hundred buildings surrounded by massive exterior stone walls. The complex is situated on a ridge overlooking the Utcubamba Valley in northern Peru at 3000 metres above sea level, judging from its sheer size, Kuelap’s construction required considerable effort, rivaling or surpassing in size other archaeological structures in the Americas. The structure is almost 600 metres in length and its walls rise up to 19 metres in height. There are multiple levels or platforms within the complex. Because of its extension, these flat elevations support about 400 constructions, most of them cylindrical. It could have been built to defend against the Huari or others, but evidence of hostile groups at the site is minimal.
Radiocarbon dating samples show that construction of the structures started in the 6th century AD and the complex was occupied until the Early Colonial period (1532-1570). Through the pre-Columbian, conquest and colonial periods, there are only four brief written references to Kuelap.
It was rediscovered in 1843, when Juan Crisóstomo Nieto, a judge in Chachapoyas, made a survey of the area and took note of Kuelap’s great size; he was guided by villagers who had known of the site for generations. Subsequently, Kuelap gained the attention of explorers, historians and archaeologists.
Regarding the function of Kuelap, there is not a scholarly consensus. Popularly it is thought of as a “fortress”, because of its location and the high walls which support its primary level. Adolf Bandelier and especially Louis Langlois tried to demonstrate that Kuelap might have been a fortified place destined to serve as a refuge for the population in emergency situations. They attributed to it, probably by analogy, the same function as medieval European boroughs.
The high walls that cover the outer surfaces of the platform, and the tightness of the access to the citadel in its final stretch, suggest that the monument of Kuelap could be constructed as having a defensive character, or at least that it provided a refuge that was protected against intruders. It likely also had religious or sacred function.
This way, taking into consideration the function served by the monumental architecture in the Peruvian archaeological past in general, the same one that was related to the socioeconomic needs, it can be concluded that Kuelap could be basically a pre-Inca sanctuary. A powerful aristocracy lived in it, whose primary mission was to administer food production and provide religious leadership. [x]

baby, you’re my firework

Genre: Fluff/Romance, Vernon!AU

Word Count: 2368

Characters: Hansol Vernon Chwe/Original Female Character

(a/n): To my always wonderful and lovely @hansolmates, the Yoon Jeonghan to my Joshua Hong Kong, here is your long-awaited belated birthday and Christmas present and I hope you like it! 2016 was an awesome year full of amazing memories and here’s to another of making many more while continuing to be the Seventeen trash that we are.♡

9:30pm

She was sitting on the window sill in her apartment, which was on the third floor of her building complex. Her apartment was situated in Hongdae, the part of Seoul where everyone her age basically went to party every night. She lived across the street from a studio, with a big tree planted right in front of it. Right now it was decorated with twinkling lights for the holidays. White bulbs combined with the snow sitting on the branches made for a picturesque winter night.

She observed the scene outside: people bustling in the city streets below, bright lights illuminating the restaurants and clubs, girls shivering in short sequin skirts, and guys wearing button downs and long coats. It was the one night where everyone dressed their absolute best while trying to stay warm in the brisk, winter weather. The one night where everyone wore as much glitter as they wanted without being judged for looking like a gaudy disco ball.  

It was New Year’s Eve and everyone in Seoul went out with their friends to welcome the new year. Some hoped to drink the regrets and bad memories of the past year away while others wanted to experience one last unforgettable moment.

Keep reading

Home || c.h

ofc, you can have any imagine you want my love

I M A G I N E 

Fan hate. 

It’s something you were forced to put up with when it came to dating Calum. It came with many downsides that put you in a very complex situation. Along with fan hate was the distant that was between you guys almost most of the years you two have been together. Then there’s the jealousy that consumes you every time you see millions of fans at meet-and-greets go to kiss your very boyfriend on his chubby cheeks. 

You thought you could handle it, as you have been able to for a fair couple of years. But, on the flight to Australia to see the Hoods, you couldn’t help but feel like your tolerance was reaching its limit. It made you uneasy, twiddling your thumbs anxiously as you tried to listen to some music. But listening to Attention by the Weeknd gave your tongue a bit of distaste. 

How selfish were you? Your very own mind spat at you as you studied the screen in front of you. But you couldn’t pay attention to the action film in front of you as the image of Calum being kissed by all these fans was taunting you. 

It was cruel of you. You were already fortunate enough to date the amazing bass player. He loved you differently from the fans, the boys, and his family. You were the girl he chose from the crowd, the only girl that managed to illuminate his life with one simple smile. Your personality stood out from them all, having you become Calum’s girl. 

But that was the beginning of everything. 

Time has passed, and the attention he used to give you has been slipping away slowly. And you understood as he was a rockstar pursuing his dreams. But it began to hurt. He’d only call you once a week and text you once every 3 days. It was like he was becoming bored of you. Could that even be a possibility? Perhaps. 

But even so… you looked down at the plane ticket he paid for. First class ticket to Sydney, where you’ll be picked up by Mali and taken to the house of the Hoods. The boys are on break, so Calum wanted to finally spend time with you. Just like you two planned. 

But your paranoia was still getting the best of you as your tolerance is on the edge. 


“Y/N, you’ve had that gloomy face since I picked you up,” Mali said, glancing at you slightly as her hands firmly held the car wheel. You give her a sheepish smile as you attempted to lift your mood. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” you gave Mali a reassuring smile as you picked at your nails. “It was a long flight, and travelling through timezones is exhausting as hell.” You faked a yawn, even though you really were tired. Mali giggled, nodding as she put her eyes completely back on the road. Your smile quickly fell back down to a frown as you studied your hands. 

Within minutes, Mali was parking at their driveway as you grabbed your bag firmly. Once she parked, you calmly left the car and let out a sigh. Just smile and be happy that you’re finally spending time with him, you thought. It used to be so easy. What’s going on?

“He’s literally gonna cry when he sees you,” Mali gushes as she locks her car and takes out her house keys. Walking over to the front door, you watch her open the door and let you in. “Calum, I got her!” She yells, having you giggle as you came inside and went to greet Calum’s mother. 

“Y/N! How are you, dear?” Joy contently greeted you, having her arms open up just for you. Entering them, you give Joy a firm hug and a kiss on the cheek. She was practically like a second mother for you, considering how sweet she’s always been to you. You always felt at home around her, like you’re her very own daughter as well. 

“I’m incredible, Joy, how have you been?” You ask happily as you two held each others arms. She was practically radiating from the sight of you. 

“Happier now that you’re here as well!” Joy said with sincerity. “It’s always good to have my boy and his amazing girlfriend over for a bit. I always feel the love between you two.” You smiled. but you couldn’t help but feel a little hurt. The love between you and Calum feels like it’s faltering just a bit as time goes. 

“Y/N!” Calum cheered as he ran into the kitchen and grabbed you from Joy. He gave you a big hug, making you squeal from the sudden grasp. You wrapped your arms around him as well, feeling your heart race from the contact. “I missed you…” he whispered in your ear, feeling your cheeks heat up as you nodded gently. 

“I missed you as well,” you whispered in return, having him hug you tighter. Although this moment felt as though your relationship was weaving itself back together, the next day had your doubt come back. 


“Calum? D’you wanna go to the movies?” You asked quietly as you awkwardly stood in the doorway of your shared bedroom. Calum was laying down on his bed, his chocolate eyes glued onto his phone. He was looking through tweets since the both of you have woken up, not even giving you a morning kiss. “Calum?” 

Still nothing. 

“How about a picnic to the park?” You suggested with a small smile. “I can ask Joy to make us a basket and we can walk over to your favorite park. You can bring your guitar, too. Maybe write a bit of music?” 

Silence. 

“Calum…” you said quietly, your hope slipping away as he put his phone down and gave you an agitated look. 

“Can’t you see I’m busy, Y/N?” Calum lashed at you. “These tweets aren’t gonna answer themselves you know.” You simply blinked, unable to comprehend what just happened. He put the fans before you. This hasn’t been the first time, and you understood that he loves his fans and has to attend to them. But you haven’t seen this boy in seven months while he’s been all over the world with millions of fans screaming his name. 

You’ve reached the limit. 

“Alright,” you said, swallowing harshly before you began packing up your bag. As you were finishing up, Calum finally noticed and put his phone down. But you didn’t bother raising your eyes to him. 

“Y/N, what’re you doing?” Calum asked, acting as though he’s done nothing. You stand up once more with your bag now hanging from your body. Weaving your hair back, you turned your back to him and began walking out the room. “Y/N! Come back– where are you going?” 

“To the airport,” you say as you rush yourself down the stairs. Calum quickly followed, catching up to you. His calloused hand caught your shoulder and turned you around. Finally catching your eyes, he noticed them coated with tears and flinched. 

“The airport? Y/N, what’s going on?” Calum asked, his almond eyes filling themselves up with worry. You looked into them and felt tears slipping out of your eyes. Biting your bottom lip, you let out a ragged sigh and gulp down your anxiety. 

“I’m going home, Calum,” you mutter, sniffling a bit as your emotions were taking you aback. Calum quickly grabbed your soft hands, giving you a scared look as he held you. 

“Wh-what are you talking about? Baby, you are home…”

“You’re no longer my home…” you whispered painfully as you gave his hands a light squeeze. “We’re done, Calum. I’m done being stuck in second place.” How selfish, how greedy. “I’m sorry.” 

“Y/N, no, no no no,” Calum began, his voice becoming shaky. He tightened his grip on your hands as you felt him tremble. “Y/N, you’re my girl. You’re my whole world, space, stars– everything. Second place to what, baby? You’d never be second!” 

“I’m intruding into your career now, Calum,” you said quietly. You looked down at your feet, feeling your toes curled in your white converse. “You have to tend to your fans and I guess I understand now that I can’t be in that mixture anymore.” It pained you to see your loved one hurting. But you had to do this, for you and him. 

“Y/N, no, please don’t go!” Calum wept, tears finally escaping those eyes you fell in love with. Your hands slipped from his as you quickly fled through the front door and began walking to the street. You quickly got a taxi, slipping inside as Calum placed his hands on the window. “Y/N! Y/N please don’t leave me! Fucking please!” 

“I’m sorry,” you said, placing your hands on the window to be in sync with his. You told the taxi driver the airport you wanted to go to as you began to drive away. Calum attempted to chase you down but by 3 blocks, he stopped and fell to the floor. 

You watched as the man you loved pounded the concrete floor in pain. 

3 months later… 

“This way, Y/N,” the doorman greeted as you walked into the 5SOS pad. Your eyes kept shifting from the many dancing guests in the home. Thanking the doorman, you held your strapless purse with both hands while walking around. You were hoping to see the boys and Michael to give him his birthday gift and flee immediately. 

It’s only been 3 months, but its felt like a year since you’ve seen your favorite Maori boy. After breaking his heart (and yours in the process), you haven’t been able to even try becoming friends with him. He pleaded for you to return to be his girl, and as much as you wanted to– you resisted. Your greedy self wanted all his attention that you didn’t deserve. But the way he put you second just broke you into millions of pieces. 

Wandering carelessly, you quickly halted when your eyes met the ones with the beautiful almond colors. Your heart was racing when you saw the Maori boy with the chubby cheeks and the short hair. He was dressed in a suit, but still had a pair of converse on. He was never one to get completely dressed up, you thought. 

“Y/N…” Calum mumbled, his voice slightly raspy. His eyes were slightly puffy and pink, like he’s been crying for a while. Was that because of me? You didn’t want to believe it, but that was probably the case. “Look at you…” he was awestruck by your appearance, having a few tears begin to well up in his eyes. 

“Shit!” You heard Ashton exclaim as he rushed to Calum’s side. Ashton gave you a smile, having you give him a sheepish wave before he began taking Calum away. But as he was, Calum kept shouting your name. 

“Y/N!” Luke and Michael greeted, giving you a big hug as you smiled at them. You were happy to see the boys, even though the sight of heartbroken Calum was swelling your heart. The boys then looped their arms around yours and guided you outside to the pool with haste. 

“Guys?” You asked them as they rushed you outside. You were introduced to the night once more as you looked at Muke stand with concern. They were both dressed up nicely, with the birthday boy wearing a cute little crown. “Why are we out here?” 

“Y/N, do you love Calum?” Luke asked, giving you a serious look with his blue eyes as icy as ever. You gulped, looking at him before looking at Michael. The pair of green eyes was giving you the same stare, one that made your legs feel like jelly. 

“Of course I do…” You said with a sigh. Your gaze dropped down to the tiles, studying their form as you tightened your fists. “But, out of love, I had to let him go. I’m such a selfish girl, I want him solely to myself. But he has fans and I was tired of sharing… of being second.” 

“Y/N, he’d never put you second,” Michael began, clearing his throat. “Calum has been focused on the fans lately, I give you that. But he has to because they are the reasons we’re here living our dreams. He loves them, Y/N.” Your fists only got tighter from hearing that, making you attempt to gulp down your tears. 

“But the way he loves you is so much different,” Luke says. “You are his muse, Y/N. You are the reason he wakes up and goes to sleep soundly. You are the inspiration for the words he writes and the songs he sings. You are his music, his escape.” Your firsts were hurting from how much you’ve been grasping at nothing. “Don’t you see? You’re his–”

“Calum!” You heard Ashton shout as the sliding doors opened. You looked up to see Calum run to you. Quickly, he grabbed you in his arms and planted his face in the crook of your neck. Tears began to ornate your neck as Calum wept on you. 

“My world, my sun, my moon, my reason to live,” Calum muttered, holding you as if someone was gonna take you from him. “Let me come home, Y/N. Please let me back home…” his fingers began digging lightly into your skin, having him grab a bit of your clothing. 

Your hands loosened, having them hang as you were stunned. The boy you’ve loved for years, who you broke, was holding you in his arms. You didn’t deserve it, and you know you didn’t. But Calum wanted you. He wanted you more than anything at that very moment and every second after. Sighing, you smile weakly before wrapping your arms around the Maori boy. 

“Welcome home,” you whispered as you gave one of his cheeks a small kiss. 

It’s Over, Isn’t It?

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader

Genre: Angst, with a bit of fluff and implied smut

Description: Even though you and Jungkook are over, both of you can’t seem to leave each other’s life.


The bright sunbeams hit your face as you sink your body deeper into the comfort of the soft silky sheets. Remaining in that position, your eyes flutter open to meet a dazzling sight you find all too familiar. Next to you lie a beautiful boy, delicate as a feather, snuggled in your embrace. His skin shines as he basks in the rays of the sun that highlight his toned chest. With muscles that were probably sculpted by the gods themselves, Jungkook looked ethereal.
It seems that you have found yourself in the same complex situation yet again. Chills spread through your whole body as memories of the previous night flashes through your mind causing a deep blush to creep upon your cheeks. Lustful moans, savoury kisses, sinful acts, and empty promises filled this room the previous night. And the night before that. And the night before that one. It was like a vicious cycle, an order that you and Jungkook could not defy.
Both of you had promised each other that it will never happen again, yet, here you both are. Your naked bodies are tangled together, like a tied string, with his hands wrapping around your bare torso and your head resting on his chest. No matter how hard you try to resist him, no one can deny how you both fit together like two jigsaw pieces. No matter how right it felt, it was still wrong. Besides, you and Jungkook are supposed to be over.


 Your muffled sobs filled your small apartment as you heart shattered into a million pieces. You tried to understand the situation for it was such an unforeseen circumstance. You harshly wiped the tears away as you tried to reason with Jungkook. “I don’t understand. What are you saying Jungkook? Where is this coming from?”

It broke him to see you cry. With tears flowing down your face and redness surrounding your eyes, it was not a pleasant sight. The guilt dragged him down for he knew he was the cause of your pain but deep down, he understood that it was all for the best. Even if he accepted the position he was in, he couldn’t understand if it was the best for you or for him.

He masked his feelings with an emotionless exterior as he spoke, “What is there to understand? I don’t love you anymore. I don’t think I ever did. We shouldn’t continue to try and hold on to what isn’t there anymore.” His cold voice almost made Jungkook believe in his own cruel lies.

Your body shivered as you furiously shook your head, refusing to trust his bitter words. Your voice trembled as you used all the courage you had left to tell him, “No, I don’t believe you. You said you love me. You said—.”

You were cut off by Jungkook. While you were shaking, your words barely making sense, Jungkook was collected, his voice showed no sign of unstableness. “Loved.” He corrected me, reaching up and placed his smooth palms on my wet cheeks, wiping away the tears that were flowing down my face. “I’m sorry, ______. I think we should break up.” As he finished his statement, Jungkook dropped his arms to his sides and made his way towards your door, wishing he could exit your life without any more damage.

You ran after him, desperately tugging on his arm, grasping it tightly as if you never want him to leave, wishing he could stay with your for eternity. “Please, Jungkook. Don’t do this. You don’t know what you’re doing. You can’t—.”

“Please, _______, just move on already.” Jungkook cut you off again with his final words echoing through the halls of your apartment. You dropped on your knees after hearing the loud slam of your front door, indicating that Jungkook had left your apartment and maybe your life. You repeated his last words over and over, and the words slowly turning into unrecognizable syllables. “It’s over.”
Perhaps those words didn’t make sense at all.


Over. That’s the word. That was the word that was supposed to summarize your relationship with him, the relationship that no longer was. It was supposed to end months ago, but none of you had the courage to fully cut the other person off. Each time one of you appeared in the other person’s life, no one dared end the connection you two had. It was cruel fate, you and Jungkook were bound to find your way back together again. No matter how much you tried to resist him, you were unable to do so, for you and Jungkook believed that you two were meant for each other.

After your break up, the only time Jungkook had the courage to talk to you again was late at night when he was drunk and at your door when you least expected it. The first time it happened, you were angry. The second time, you were hesitant. The third time, you caved into his comfort without much thoughts knowing you needed him, you craved his touch. Before you knew it, Jungkook’s late night visits became so frequent that you lost count of how many times it had happened. These visits had soon become a commonplace in your life, and you could not bring them to a stop no matter how hard it was.

~
The first time he visited you was exactly a month after your break up. You dreaded the memories, unable to cope with them at that time, you confined yourself in the loneliness of your apartment for you wanted time to yourself tonight. Your wishes became unfulfilled as a heavy knock could be heard throughout your house. You looked at the digital clock next to the television to see that it was already 12:15 am. Crazy ideas flooded your mind as you questioned who could be visiting you this late at night?

You rushed to the door, hesitant to open it at first, but once you did, regret instantly filled your body. Your muscles tensed as you took in the sight before you. There, the almighty Jeon Jungkook stood with sweat dripping down his forehead, his balance being distorted, and a goofy grin spreading across his face as if he was unaware of where he was. His tall figure fell on your body, pulling you into an uncomfortable embrace. Your eyebrows furrowed at the strong stench of alcohol that reeked from his body. Of course, he had come to you when he’s drunk. How typical of him. As he nuzzled his face closer, Jungkook muttered in your hair. “I miss you, _____. I miss you so much.”

You had to use all of your strength to push him off, as he had a larger frame than you. As he stumbled back, rage burned from the pits of your stomach and fury spread through your body as you looked at his confused expression. “What are you doing here Jungkook?”

He tried to approach you once more but you held your hands up, motioning him to stop. Sadness grew in his eyes, and he searched your face for any sign of love you still have left for him. “I miss you, baby. I was so stupid for kicking you out of my life. I need you so bad. I made a mistake leaving you but I thought—.”

Now it was your turn to cut him off and let him have a taste of his own medicine. “Jungkook, I’m going to ask you again. What are you doing here? Because I obviously know you don’t miss me after what you said last time you were here.”

“I thought breaking up with you was the only choice. Please, babe!” Jungkook pleaded desperately, his hands reaching out to hold yours, but you quickly snatched your hand away from his grasp. You scoffed in amusement as you marvelled at the display in front of you, for Jeon Jungkook was begging for your forgiveness.

“Don’t call me that, Jungkook! You don’t get to say that anymore! You and I both know you don’t mean it anymore after last time. I don’t know why you’re here since we’re over. You broke up with me remember?” Your words were seething with the burning hatred you held onto for a full month as you continuously brought up your previous encounter. In one swift motion, he was pushed out of your apartment. You harshly slammed the door in his face as he did to you the previous month and left him in the empty hallway. Through the thin walls, you could hear him weeping, and the sound broke your heart. No matter how much you tried to convince yourself that you did not love him, deep down, you know it’s just a mere lie.


The second time he showed up was a day after the first time. Not wanting to retain memories from the previous night, you bought several bottles of soju and caged yourself in the isolation of your apartment like you did for several lonely nights. Tears streamed down your face, the small droplets created a puddle on the floor, as you pulled your knees closer to your body with the green bottle still in your firm grasp.
A heavy knock can be heard and you had an idea on who it was at your door this late at night. A scowl was plastered across your face you Jungkook appeared in front of you. The potent smell of alcohol reeked from his clothes, indicating that he can only talk to you once he had a bit of liquid courage. Seeing him before you once more only made the familiar urge to run into his arms much more tempting. However, you restrained yourself from doing so. “What are you doing here again, Jungkook?”

In one swift stride, Jungkook stood before you. You could not see the distinct features on his face due to the dim light in the hallway outside of your door, but you could sense he was hurting upon hearing his quiet sniffs and his puffy red eyes. Just the sight of him, pretending to be hurt like you were, made you absolutely sick. You had no clue on why he was crying. He was in no position to do so since he was the one that broke your heart.

Jungkook, avoiding making eye contact with you, gripped on you hand and pulled you into your own apartment, closing the door behind him. He placed both of his palms on both sides of your face. Brushing the loose hair away from your face, he took in the beauty of your face as if it was the only thing he wanted to see for all of eternity. He harshly placed his lips upon yours, but in contrast with the roughness of the kiss, his lips were soft and sweet. You froze, your body unable to comprehend what was happening.

You pulled away, the tears glazing in your eyes as you stared at him through your blurry vision. Your raspy voice sounded quiet yet Jungkook could make out every word you said. “Jungkook, you’re drunk. You don’t know what you’re doing. You broke my heart yet you keep running back to me. I can’t do this. I can’t—.”

Jungkook cuts you off by placing his smooth lips on yours once again. This time, you did not hold back and allowed him to kiss you. None of you dared pull away as you Jungkook eagerly advanced towards your bedroom. Craving each other’s touch with each kiss, his hands roamed your body as he places kisses on where your tears once were and mumbled sweet apologies in your ear. Soon, his clothes were mixed with your clothes as random pieces with scattered around the hardwood floor of your bedroom. His deep grunts blended perfectly with loud moans as desire seeped through the sheets of your bed. You wanted to remain like this forever while both of you reached your high, collapsing on the bouncy mattress bellow you. He pulled your body closer to his with his face nuzzled in your hair. “I love you.” He didn’t think you’d hear his faint whispers, but you did. You smiled as you snuggled deeper into Jungkook’s embrace, falling sleeping in his comfort.

The next morning, all of your dreams were crushed and the familiar feeling of heartbreak replaced memories of last night. You woke up to see Jungkook was not beside you, but instead an empty spot took his place. Confused, you sat up and found a pack of blue sticky notes on your nightstand. 

I’m sorry ______. Last night was a mistake. I have too much to lose. I’m an idol, I can’t be with anyone without feeling guilt for betraying my fans, but I can’t help but feel guilt for betraying you whenever I’m with my fans. I wish I could be selfish and be with you, but I can’t. I have to constantly remind myself that I broke up with you, but I can’t stop running back to you. I keep forgetting the fact that we’re supposed to be over and each time I run back to you, I know it breaks your heart. It hurts me to know that I’m the one causing you pain. I’m sorry______. We’re supposed to be over and I want to keep my promise. From now one, let’s just pretend we don’t know each other.


After a week of self-conflict and debating, you found yourself in front of Bangtan’s dorm. This would be the third time you would see him this late at night, but unlike the other times, this would be the first time you made the first advance. You knew that Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon would be at the studios at this time at night due to them working late. You assumed that Jin, Taehyung, and Jimin would spend time practicing the dance for an upcoming comeback, perfecting every sharp move, making sure it’s good enough for ARMY’s standards. There you stood, in front of the door, debating if you should knock.

You knew the chances of Jungkook being present at the dorm at that time was slim so you left without another word. On your way out, you kept your head low, looking at the ground, not wanting to look up at the hallways of the apartment building. You realized it was a major mistake as you walked into a large figure. Your look up to meet the eyes of your ex-boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook, with a shocked expression carved out on both of your faces. 

“______?” He asked, surprised that he would see you once more. Jungkook secretly wanted to see you again, but not after what all the cruel things he had told you in the small note. “What are you doing here?” He made his way towards the shared apartment, and opened the door, stepping aside to let you into his home. You both took your shoes off, leaving them in the mountain of shoes stacked near the door, and made your way towards the living room where both of you sat down across from each other.

You stood up and stared at his eyes, searching for any remorse, as you inquired the answer you wanted to know for days. “Jungkook, what the hell? What the fuck happened? What the hell was that note? Is that the reason why you’re avoiding me?”

“Wasn’t the note obvious.” Jungkook stood up as well to meet your eyes as he continued. “We shouldn’t do this anymore. The other night was a mistake. I thought both of us would want some closure.” Even though there was genuine tenderness in his voice, you couldn’t help but feel a pierce through your heart.

Slowly, you made your way towards him, taking small steps in case he hesitated. Your raspy voice appeared quiet yet you sounded like you knew what you were talking about. “Closure!” You exclaimed. “You’re unbelievable. I know you don’t mean it Jungkook. The other night wasn’t a mistake and you know it. I know you still love me and no matter how many times I lie to myself, I still love you.”

Before you knew it, you were in front of Jungkook. His deep, brown eyes pulled you into a trance for you could not help but stare at his beautiful features. Your hypnotic state was dispersed when Jungkook’s voice broke the silence with his tempting question. “Do you know how hard it is for me to resist kissing you right now?”

You smirked and your arms slid up Jungkook’s chest and wrapped themselves around his neck. You leaned in closer until you could feel his hot, unsteady breath hitting your top lip. “So what’s stopping you?”

His arms pulled you closer and pressed your body against his as his lips attacked you. In an instant, your back is pressed up against the wall with your legs wrapped around his torso. He placed harsh kisses on your collar bones, trailing the kisses up your neck and your jawline. “How do I get over someone like you, ______?” He growled in my ear. “It’s impossible to get over someone as perfect as you, baby.”

“Jungkook.” You moaned his name, making it hard for him to stop. You loud cries echoed through the halls of the dorm as he made love to you. All the pain you’ve felt for the last week, all the questions, and all the doubts disappeared as his kisses covered your entire body, making sure that nothing remained untouched by him. You were so caught up in the pleasure that you stupidly believed that this time would be different from the last.

Unfortunately, you were wrong. When you woke up the next morning, Jungkook was already up and dressed, waiting for you to awaken from your slumber. With each sentence shattering your heart little by little, your throat felt clogged as you listened to his words. You stayed quiet, staring at the blanket, as he told you that the previous night was a mistake over and over again. Of course, he had his career to worry about. The golden maknae of BTS could not be caught in a dating scandal. Jungkook ended the lecture with the words that repeated in your head like a mantra since the day we broke up. It’s over.


Over. That was what you and Jungkook were supposed to be. Even though he said it was over, somehow it didn’t feel like that at all. With the late night meet ups with Jungkook, it seems that neither one of you could let the other go.

Trying to get out of bed, you unwrap his arms from your waist, slowly scooting farther away from him. Feeling the sudden balance shift in the bed, Jungkook finally wakes up to see you trying to get away. As you pull up your underwear, you were unaware that Jungkook was behind you, ready to pounce on you at any moment. He places a delicate kiss on your shoulder as his arms rest on the soft skin of your hips. “What are you doing out of bed, baby?” 

You chuckle as you pull his arms off of you. “I have to get dressed Jungkook.” You turn around to see a playful pout on the boy’s face as he starts to wrap his arms around your body once more. In one swift motion, your back hit the comfort of your mattress, and Jungkook crawls on top of you with a devilish grin on his face. He collapses on your body and kisses you. With his head resting on your breast and his arms holding onto you, you find comfort in uncertainty.

You know damn well that once both of you leave the privacy of your apartment, you and Jungkook are nothing but mere strangers to each other. Behind closed doors, you were everything he could wish for, but to the world, you two were over.


Shout out to @yoongigay for editing this.

living situation fantasy that I’ve had for a while:

group of interconnected people, some friends, some partners, gets a big plot o land not very far from the city

everyone has their own yurt to live in, or can share a yurt if they want – for an individually customizable blend of alone & together time

one big communal building with real bathrooms/showers, a nice kitchen, a media room, a music room, a lounge, and a basement for storage & in case of tornados

we can all share a car or two for getting into the city as desired

everyone can contribute to upkeep on the land & buildings, contributing skills & knowledge

LOVE ALL AROUND

People need to understand, just because islamists and other forms of religious authoritarians are pretty much always wrong, secularists are not automatically right either.
Stop being lazy by trying to reduce every situation to an if then. Think critically about inherently complex situations.

anonymous asked:

I remember seeing comments about how Garroth was in the wrong for being mad at Aph when she told him she was pregnant, Aph said she loved Garroth and Laurance but never said anything about Aaron, so as far as they were both concerned she loved them when she didn't, basically leading them on. I mean I'd be mad if someone who claimed to love me was pregnant and in love with another man

Garroth is in the wrong. Laurance is in the wrong. Aphmau in the wrong.

Nobody was innocent with what went down– and it was a complex situation made worse by Garroth’s jealousy, Aphmau’s avoidance of communication and Laurance’s anger fueled by being in a bad mental space.

You wanna know the driving force of all this? Insecurity.

I know, I know Aarmau is official the soulmate ship but why it came into being… and why a lot of fans didn’t like it, even Aarmau fans being upset what happened, was because it felt like Aphmau chose Aaron out of desperation and being in a bad place. She didn’t feel in control of her life but with Aaron? She could pick him and run away with the burden of deciding between two people she love, a love that could very well be platonic rather than romantic like she first thought. That why it felt so rushed, that why a lot of people went like “????” because while it was building up, Aphmau just lunging into a sexual bond with Aaron felt like out of field risk.

Garroth was trapped in another dimension which was a heavenly space as smack-in-the-face allegory of him needing to redeem himself after making a HORRIBLE mistake. What was the driving force that made a person who claimed to be for good and the righteous make such a rash, ill-thought out? Damn boy is insecure as fuck. He couldn’t even stand the thought of somebody else being with Aphmau, somebody who was a good friend and trusted. So his reaction to Aaron? I’m surprised he didn’t blow up even more! He has self-entitltedment that currently in season 3, Aphmau would crush under her feet because Garroth’s biased decisions aren’t the most sound.

And Laurance. God, you all know I go soft for him but he did need to take responsibility of the pressure he put on Aphmau. He’s the one, while at the time it seemed noble and romantic, made her to narrow down her choices to just him and Garroth– and that’s fucked up. Sure, this shown he was considerate of other’s feelings but at that moment? He just assumed Aphmau would end up with him or Garroth. This assumption was what his jealousy and confusion, his eventual insecurity and unstableness was built upon! Aphmau didn’t plant this idea, HE did. She didn’t owe it to them to return it– while she went about this so fucking poorly and what she did to them inexcusable, at the end of the day, she didn’t owe them love.

She owed them a proper conversation. Like what adults do. That’s her fault, like I said– Aphmau didn’t communicate.

Maybe that’s why I love season 3!Aphmau more because it showed she matured! Garroth hasn’t changed, Laurance changed but we don’t know for better or for worse.

All in all, this ot3 aren’t the healthiest and I still assert that while Aphmau might’ve went to Aaron in a vulnerable moment where she didn’t know all her feelings and was shitty what she did to both Laurance and Garroth, aarmau still was better and both Laurance & Garroth done shit that don’t leave them out of the blame.

Tl;dr:

Aphmau fucked up. Laurance fucked up. Garroth fucked up. All three weren’t meant for each other because all they did was generate insecurity and hesitation to properly talk, lack of consideration of the other’s feelings, and entitlement that shouldn’t exist being there!!! Garmau/Larmau was fucking doomed from the start lmfao.

So don’t pile the blame on Aphmau.

petition to stop wording summaries of Henry VIII’s marriages to lay blame at the wives’ feet. stop using ‘failure to produce a son’ as a legitimate reason for Henry abusing and killing Katharine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn respectively. stop using Katherine Howard’s alleged promiscuity as a valid reason for her death. stop simplifying these complex situations to make Henry sound like a hero.

Being poly can present one with a lot of complicated and complex situations and emotions - much like any relationship, poly or monogamous.  People are complicated, relationships are complicated, emotions are complicated, the banister is complicated (my Rocky Horror is showing).  

So, I’m left wondering just where it all sits, you know?  I know things are the best they have ever been with my beloved wife but they have been getting a little more complicated emotionally with one of my … lovers? Girlfriends? Friends that fuck? I don’t even know what to call her at this point aside from friend, of course.  We still measure it as a friendship and it always will be but emotions are beginning to get involved.  I suppose they might be romantic inclinations but I honestly don’t know.  I know where she stands on it and she has expressed a romantic interest but I honestly don’t know if that’s what I want or if I am even looking to start such a relationship outside of what I have with my wife. 

What about the others I’m involved with?  What about those that are flirting with the idea of us “hooking up” in some manner? What about those I’m flirting with the idea of hooking up with or expressing interest in? What about those that might have an interest in said partner? Would this make things needlessly more complicated and spoil what we have?  That’s a lot of variables.  

Do I love her?  In a way, yes.  Romantically? There’s potential, if not outright inklings that there definitely are said sorts of emotions.  

Sorting through it all has been buzzing around in my head all week and I’m putting those thoughts down in a post because it helps me sort them.  Sorry about the emotional dribble but I need a space I can just vent such things without worrying about it.  Tumblr makes a good space for that.

i feel like people don’t talk about 1x13 outside of “haha, the saphael breakup”

it really is more than that and i hardly see the betrayal discussed without involving saphael in some way. you all know that i love saphael but the point of this post is that raphael’s trust was significantly betrayed, he was humiliated, and most importantly put in danger by it, because camille will probably be super pissed about the fact that raphael overthrew her. now raphael – he’s been through a lot of shit, but he trusted simon, he gave simon everything, every resource he had physically environmentally and emotionally, he saved simon and helped the shadowhunters when he absolutely had no obligation to, and he got screwed over. more than likely it hurt him very deeply, and more than likely it will take him a very long time to trust anyone again – especially simon and especially the shadowhunters. 

it’s a very complex situation that had to have been completely devastating and the betrayal needs to be discussed outside of the shipping context more often. i love fics where simon comes back to the hotel and raphael immediately forgives him as much as the next guy, but they are probably not realistic to the situation. we need to stop ignoring raphael’s feelings as an individual in general, but especially when it comes to this. 

sorry for rambling, its just been on my mind a lot

anonymous asked:

Hi! First off, I want to say that I absolutely love your writing! I relate to your writing so much! But as I was finishing up my first semester of college I met a boy. Thinking back on it now, he only wanted me physically, and I stupidly decided to go along with his malevolent plan because I wanted to "get my kicks out." Truth is, after messing around with him, I became attached. He left abruptly but I don't understand why. His friends say he became attached, could this be true?

Thank you, I’m glad! 

This could theoretically be a longer, two-sided conversation that explores the details of what sounds like a complex situation…so I’ll leave it at this: sure, it could be true. But it also might not be. 

If you’re like me, and you tend to get lost in your own mind, I find it personally helpful to not ruminate on another individual’s thoughts/actions when it’s regarding something in the past that I don’t intend to pursue. Only because you’ll likely never know. And wondering, though tempting, usually doesn’t lead to anything constructive. Probably not groundbreaking insight (sorry!) but it’s something that’s often true.

I empathize with struggling not understanding the “why” piece of a scenario though, so I hope you come to a peaceful resolution within your mind - even if that looks like letting go of analyzing the situation all together.

Recognizing the Inferior Function in INxJ

[ quick switch: ISxJ | INxJ | IxTP | IxFP | ExTJ | ENxP | ExFJ | ESxP ]

(excerpts from Was That Really Me? by Naomi Quenk)

Important Features of Dominant Introverted Intuition

Introverted Intuitive types are the most intellectually independent of the types. They have a theory to explain everything, prefer innovative solutions to established ones, and are adept at seeing situations from an unusual perspective. Their skill at taking a very broad, long-range view of things contributes to their reputation as visionaries. Regardless of whether their auxiliary judging preference is Thinking or Feeling, their dominant Intuition tends to be sharp, quick, and often uncannily correct. It is as if they have antennae that enable them to detect things long before other people do.

People often count on INTJs and INFJs for insightful analyses and forthright judgments. They are adept at appropriately discounting distracting details and homing in on the essential meaning of complex, confusing situations.

Introverted Intuitive types report being puzzled by others’ perception of them as rigid and intractable.This perception may result from their tendency to express their views directly and forcefully.This is especially true for INTJs. Misinterpretation of their forthright communication style as inflexibility may make others reluctant to present alternatives or argue their own point of view. But, as described in Chapter 3, dominant Perceiving types are unlikely to be wedded to their decisions, since they give greater weight to data (perceptions) than to conclusions (judgments). Experience bears this out for the most part. INTJs and INFJs readily modify their incorrect conclusions when they receive convincing contradictory new information.

The spiritual, sometimes mystical, bent of Introverted Intuitive types has been frequently noted.At the very least, they seem to be aware of subtle cues or nuances long before others notice them. INFJs are especially sensitive to unexpressed anger and conflict, whose presence is usually denied by others.This contributes to the sense of separateness from others that many Introverted Intuitive types report, which may lead them to doubt their own mental stability.

Introverted Intuitive types, especially INTJs, readily see the big picture in crisis situations and know how to direct others to take the most effective action.

Keep reading

中文词汇表

何苦 ( ) — why bother

庸人自扰 (yōng rén zì rǎo) — to worry about imaginary troubles

斩 (zhǎn) - to slay, chop, cut

情丝 (qíng sī) — ties of love

清醒 (qīng xǐng) — clear-headed, sober

趁早 (chèn zǎo) — as early as possible, before it is too late, at the first opportunity 

快刀断乱麻 (kuài dāo duàn luàn má) — decisive action in a complex situation

年少 (nián shào) — young, young man 

倦 (juàn) — tired, weary

归 (guī) — to go back to, return

巢 (cháo) — nest 

遭 (zāo) - round, time

预料 (yù liào) — to expect, expectation 

往事 (wǎng shì) — the past

Words taken from: 庸人自扰

I’m so terrified the show won’t get the Lydia storyline right.  It’s not impossible to call it what it is and simultaneously maintain the complexities of the situation from Amos’ perspective.

[The Churn and Nemesis Games spoilers, fyi]

Do you know what would fuck me all the way up?  Amos getting the news that she passed away and not knowing what to feel.  Because Lydia cared about him.  But she also used him [needed like a junkie craved the needle, is how she describes it].  And I’m dying at just the thought of a scene where he’s lost and confused and falling apart and someone (preferably Naomi for me but Alex at this point would do too) tells him he’s allowed to feel anything and everything because it doesn’t have to be simple.  It isn’t simple.  People can love and hurt you.

Somebody just please come tell me they won’t fuck it up. It’s not like they haven’t done a splendid job setting it up so far and I know Daniel and Ty are there quite a bit and I know the work Wes has put into understanding The Churn … I just trust TV writers as far as I can throw them.  Which is not at all.