Confession: DA:I changed my life in a lot of ways, which sounds silly because it’s a game, but more than anything else the romance with Solas made me realize how shitty my real relationship was. It was dull and also dysfunctional, just a total “safety net” situation. There was no emotional or intellectual stimulation, no common interests, no passion… Only codependency. Solas had such a unique way of looking at the world and demanded nothing of my Lavellan… it really made me think.
It got to the point where my ex even noticed I had a difference in attitude (he didn’t know it was because of the Dread Egg). I was no longer clingy, afraid, unsure… I learned to stand on my own two feet and in the end it made him leave. At first it devastated me. Then on top of that, SOLAS left me. I was so angry. I was the angriest Lavellan around. But then as I continued the game without Solas and as I completed Jaws Of Hakkon without him in my party - it dawned on me. I was my own person. I love Solas and I wish it could have ended differently, and I did choose to redeem him… but I did NOT need him.
At first I decided to “harden my heart to a cutting edge” but then, no. I am strong and independent but my heart is open, loving, and forgiving. I’m who I’m supposed to be.
After months of bothering her, I finally asked my sister why she doesn’t like Dorian. She told me that: “He looks like a mix of that mean Russian guy from Project Runway, Robbie Rotten, and the stereotypical “Twirly-Mustache-Tie-people-up-on-the train-tracks guy”. After that, I figured that I’ll just not ask her anything anymore :/