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  • Reggie [after being injected with 'truth serum']: I love butt stuff. I hate spiders. I stole a pen from the bank. I cried during ‘About a Boy’…the soundtrack! I can see why women find Clive Owen attractive to the point where I might just as well be attracted to him. I use comparisons to Hitler to win arguments on the internet at the drop of a hat. I know nothing about wine. I’m more turned on by women in pajamas than lingerie. I just wanna know that they’re comfortable. [starts sobbing] I didn’t get Inception. I didn’t get Inception! There’s so many layers.
  • Betty: How much effort do I rate?
  • Jughead: For you, I’d break a light sweat.
  • Betty: Good. I need a favor. Help Archie with his music?
  • Jughead: You're becoming dangerous, Betty. It’s those doe eyes. Disappointing you is like choking the little mermaid with a bike chain.