Imagine: Living with the Marauders and when that time of the month comes around, no one knows what to do. Well, except Sirius. He has a plan. Plus, this gif of Sirius.
Sirius walked into the kitchen, clutching a calendar and a cigarette. He was in scarlet and gold pajama pants, a pair of your rainbow colored toe socks, hair tousled and wand tucked behind his ear. Remus sat at the kitchen table, clutching the Daily Prophet and a cup of coffee. James sat in another chair, eyes closed. Peter sat across from him, lazily levitating the pepper shaker into the air and moving it up and down, occasionally sprinkling some in James Potter’s hair.
“It is the first day of the seven days of hell,” Sirius announced, holding the calendar up and pointing to the date. The block had ‘the flood begins’ in red marker in James’ handwriting inside it. Remus put the paper down and took a sip of his coffee, staring at Sirius with raised eyebrows. James’ eyes shot open. Peter lowered the pepper shaker. Sirius spoke again, “I fear while this day will be full of terrible, treacherous trials, it will not be the worst of them. Tomorrow, I feel, will be the most intense battle of these seven days of dangerous conflicts. Today, we will prepare ourselves secretly, while also making the day more tolerable for our dearest Y/N.”
“And how to you propose we do that, Pads?” Remus asked.
“Ah, Moony, my skeptical mate, I have been up all night preparing,” Sirius answered, tapping the calendar with his wand and making it vanish. “In my eight hours of debate with myself on how to go about this correctly, I have decided the best way to accomplish a twelve hour truce with the bleeding, brooding beast is simply breakfast in bed.”
“Well,” James piped up. “I think that’s a great plan, Sirius. But, I must say that the best way to start off this genius plan is not to call Y/N a bleeding, brooding beast.”
“My apologies, Prongs,” Sirius said with a smug smirk. “A moment of weakness, my friend, a moment of fear. Now, since this is my wonderfully thought out, foolproof, perfect plan, I’ve decided that I’m captain of this operation. So, with that being said - Moony, get on the eggs! Peter, there’s fresh oranges in the cupboard. Make our girl the best glass of O.J. she’ll ever taste! Prongs, the bacon, boy! Get to work!”
Remus stood up, depositing his coffee cup in the sink, and moving towards the stove, “And just what will you be doing, Padfoot?”
“What will I be doing?” Sirius asked incredulously. “I, Moony, will be making the most perfectly toasted, precisely buttered toast for our dearest housemate!”
With this being said and orders being distributed, the kitchen was launched into a chaos of shuffling feet, sizzling grease, and Sirius marching around with his toast, barking orders at everyone. In twenty minutes, Y/N’s breakfast was done and plated wonderfully. Sirius had prepared a cute wooden tray with a sky blue plate filled with eggs, bacon, and toast upon it. On it also sat a glass of orange juice and tucked under the plate was a chocolate frog, courtesy of Remus. Beside her plate was a small bowl of sliced strawberries and a fork wrapped in a napkin.
Sirius, James, Peter, and Remus all stood huddled around it, contemplating. Peter let out a sigh, “Do you think this is enough? For a truce?”
“It has to be,” Sirius answered. “Anything else would be far too much of a risk. It wouldn’t be thought through. Not foolproof.”
With a shaky breath, James hoisted the tray into the air with his wand, “I’ll go first.”
“Thank you for your sacrifice, James,” Sirius nodded, following him up the stairs. They walked in a straight, tense line. James, then Sirius, Peter behind him, and Remus taking up the rear. They reached the door much faster than any of them would’ve liked.
“She likes you the best Moony,” Peter hissed. “You knock.”
“Oh, absolutely not,” Remus replied hastily with a grin. “She definitely fancies James.”
With a small squeak, James raised his hand to the door and knocked thrice. They all stood outside awaiting a response. Seconds later, they received one. A sleepy voice on the inside croaked out, “Come in.”
Peter pushed open the door and James strutted through, hoisting your food through the door and over to you, allowing it to land gently in your lap. The orange juice barely sloshed. Remus spoke first as Y/N gawked silently at them. He grinned, “This is our offering, O’ Bloody One.”
Sirius’ eyes went wide and he kicked Remus in the shin. But, you were laughing. The tension in the room fell and the boys all slumped with relief. You smiled down at your breakfast and back up at the Marauders. “You boys are so sweet.”
“Anything for our girl,” Sirius grinned.
Silence filled the room like a gas and the boys just stood there, watching you chomp down on bacon. After two pieces, you rolled your eyes, “Well c’mon then, loves. Are we not going to have a lovely breakfast and make fun of the muggle television this morning?”
With grunts and giggled, the boys all snuggled into your king size bed. James inched in beside you, snaking arm arm around your waist. Sirius plopped a pillow down on your legs, laying horizontally across the bed, head on your legs. Peter filed in on your other side, laying his head on your shoulder. Remus placed himself in the space between James and Sirius, sticking a pillow on James’ stomach and leaning against it, sprawling his legs out across Sirius’ torso. James turned on the TV with a click of a button.
A blonde newswoman appeared on the screen pointing at what appeared to be a cold front. You grinned to yourself as James pressed a kiss to your cheek and Sirius started giggling about the misspelling of the word front on the screen.
“What kind of word is ‘fornt’?” he asked, laughing.
Faking your period had to be one of the best things you’d ever done.
So, I had this thought after reading several stories about humans giving birth and not having eggs. What if aliens do not have ‘family units’ the same way humans do, but instead raise children in more of a group setting.
Captain H'roll'ah was excited to have hired on not just 1 but 3 humans, all of whom were extremely qualified for space travel. Even better, they were all from the same clan and so there would be no rivalry or refusal to work together because of old scores to settle.
“Captain! Three humans just came in a have taken over the dining area! WHAT SHOULD WE DO?!?” Ensign Khralhen was out of breath and panicked, but his species was notoriously afraid of humans after it became public knowledge how dangerous they were. Not that his own was much better, but H'roll'ah knew that these humans should be here and it was probably near a meal time for them. How could such an evolutionary advanced and apated species not figure out a way to avoid needing 3 or meals a day was beyond H'roll'ah.
“It is fine, Ensign Khralhen. These are likely the Humans that I just signed on to the crew. They are from the same clan, so they should work at peak efficiency,” the Captain answered, trying to put as much calm and soothing into his voice as possible, “Let us go introduce ourselves and welcome them so that the ‘pack-bonding’ can begin.”
“Greetings, I am Captain H'roll'ah and this is Ensign Khralhen, our cook.”
“Nice ta meetcha! Cook, huh? Guess we best buddy up to you right quick then!” said the male. He was average height for a human and perhaps a little on the heavy side, but H'roll'ah knew that it was likely muscle not fat. After all, this human and one of his female companions were security personnel.
“Always thinking with you stomach, Thomas. How about you buddy up to the Captain, so that we do not get kicked off this boat? Hmm?” said the smaller female, later identified as Samantha or “Sam” for ease. "Small" being used only in comparison because she did not have the bulk of her clanmates. She must be the medical officer. H'roll'ah was worried that she would be distant from her clanmates but her body language suggested extreme comfort and trust, above what H'roll'ah felt for his own clanmates of different castes. The third human, Laura if the captain remembered correctly, remained silent but was constantly looking around, as if expecting an attack at any moment, not that strange considering all that H'roll'ah had hear about Earth.
“Well then, please tell me what times that the three of you eat, and I will prepare food for you then. Also, please tell me any dietary restrictions you have so that you do not have any medical incidents,” Khralhen said, realizing that the humans could be bribed with food as easily as a Con'valix could be bribed with fruits.
(3 Months Later)
Captain H'roll'ah was surprised at how well the humans worked together. He thought that they might exceed standard human operating efficiency by 10%, but regularly they were 20-25% better than the reported average. They barely needed to vocalize to communicate, and they were able to remember each other’s needs and the needs of the crew extremely well. Captain H'roll'ah decided to ask them how they did it, and if it was a clan trait, where he could hire more humans of clan “Walker.”
“Thomas clan Walker, do you have a few minutes to talk about personal matters?” The captain asked, assuming that Thomas would, since he was off shift and relaxing in the lounge.
“Sure thing, hoss. What can I do for you? And I hope this isn’t about my or Laura’s tattoo’s, because we had to settle a bet on that a few days ago,” Thomas answered easily. He was a bit flippant for the captain’s taste, but his results were impeccable and the other humans followed his lead, which spoke volumes for the man.
“I was hoping that you could explain how you and your clanmates have achieved such a high efficiency rate. You perform well above average, even for clanmates who grew up together.”
“Clanmates? Oh, that’s right! Sam mentioned that your species, and most species on this ship raise their young in a group setting and the kids hatch from eggs, right?”
“That is correct, and please do not remind me that human females carry their young in their bodies like a parasite. The last time Sam explained that, it was enough to make all of us wonder how humans have managed to reproduce at all.” H'roll'ah still shuddered when he thought of it, and Khralhen wasn’t able to cook for 3 days after Sam had explained human reproduction.
“Fair enough, I think we reproduce more by accident that anything else, but yeah. Me, Laura, and Sam are not clanmates like you think,” Thomas chuckled and shook his head, “We are siblings.”
“I do not know this word,” H'roll'ah answered uneasily. In his experience, an unknown term from a human meant that something painful, gross, horrifying, or all 3 was about to be revealed.
“Sam could explain it better, and having Laura here only seems fair…” Thomas trailed off as he reached for his comm. "Hey, brats (again with the casual disrespect), can you both get up to the lounge? Captain wants to know about siblings.“ H'roll'ah was always surprised that Thomas clan Walker could be disrespectful when asking for others to do something.
“Sure, be right up,” Sam responded. She was likely a floor up in the medical facilities and wanted to take a break.
“Grrhhrhhgg.” Laura clan Walker had been sleeping, then, and did not want to come.
“Thanks, ladies, you can both explain family better than me.” Now the captain was worried again because there was a second new word being bandied around.
“So, captain, a family unit for humans is very small compared to yours of Ensign Khralhen’s,” Sam explained, “A family is usually made up of the mother and/or father or a surrogate who has assumed that role and the children. It usually numbers no more than 4-7 individuals.”
“But…But…how do you grow or develop? And to place all that burden on only one or two adults, how do they do anything else?” spluttered K'roll'ah. He was shocked to find out that humans in the region called ‘America’ did not have an open community.
“Well, children who share 1 or both parents are called “siblings”, and they develop together. The adults are called “parents”, and yeah, there is a definite loss of freedom involved.“
“So then, you three are…siblings?” H'roll'ah asked.
“Yes, Thomas is the oldest, and Laura is the youngest, with me in the middle,” answered Sam, “and our father bailed on us after Laura was 3 years old, so Tom became the ‘man of the house’ at 7 years old.”
THAT explained Thomas clan Walker’s attitude! Captain H'roll'ah realized that Thomas clan Walker had been in a command position and not had a commander from a young age!
“So that is why you both follow him? He is the new leader”
“Kind of, he is just the best at leading. He knows what to do and does it well.” Laura answered, which was rare; she was the most quiet of the three.
“And the reason for your peak efficiency?” Captain H'roll'ah asked, determined to get an answer to his question.
“Well, we have known each other all our lives and spent most of those lives in close proximity to each other. We just understand each other from the long familiarity and exposure.”
“Ah, the same way a pilot becomes better from being on the same ship, just with a person instead.”
“Exactly! And if you are interested in hiring others we are familiar with, we have some cousins, children of our parents’ siblings, who we know very well and want to get into space.”
“Then I will look them up, thank you for answering my questions."
Humans were a strange species. Instead of focusing on a large community, they developed close bonds with only a few people who share familial ties with them. Captain H'roll'ah did hire the 'cousins’ and they worked out very well. The human guidebook was updated to notify captains that humans sharing close blood ties have the potential to perform at higher than normal efficiency.
Now somebody write a story about a captain hiring siblings who hate/cannot stand each other!
t h e g o r g o n swere three powerful, winged daemons named medusa, stheno, and euryale.
while descriptions of gorgons vary across greek literature, the term commonly refers to any of three sisters who had hair made of living, venomous snakes, as well as a horrifying visage that turned those who beheld her to stone.
of the three sisters, only medusa was mortal, and so it was her head which king polydectes of seriphos commanded the young hero perseus to fetch.
Clarke is working for an art restoration studio and was sent to repair an old, mysterious mansion. The reality is not as cool as it seems, full of dusted clothes and late hours, but one night she meets a woman there. She’s beautiful, she looks like a work of art, but she wasn’t supposed to be there. If Clarke wants to understand what is happening, she’ll have to uncover the story of a distant past, when a young Commander was cursed to become a statue, only allowed to be human again in the nights of full moon.
Rex sometimes is just really, really jealous of clone commanders working under other jedi.
Don’t get him wrong, he loves his general and commander, he thinks their the best jedi in the entire GAR and would fight anyone who would dare say otherwise. (he has fought Cody. Multiple times.)
Look, clones are adults. They’ll argue this position all day long. From a certain point of view it’s true. From a certain other point of view, they’re all ten years old.
Which means that for most clones their jedi are mentors, even guardians, almost. General Kenobe may be insane, but he is inarguably an adult and eager to impart wisdom and instruction on anyone who will actually listen. General Plo Koon earned the title General Buir. General Secura, General Windu, the list goes on. Clones are released into the world and put under the command of Jedi generals to be their authority figures and responsible adults. That’s how it works for most clones.
What did Rex get? Anakin. Kriffing. Skywalker.
Look, Rex loves the man, truly he does, but unless you’re a certain young Togruta commander and insane, Anakin Skywalker is NOT a role model.
When it comes to adulthood and responsibility in 501st, Rex is the only go-to person.
Which, knowing himself, Rex finds both insane and terrifying. He has no idea how they’re not all dead by now.