come on get loud

So today started out dumb, but this afternoon was AWESOME.

I’m on the porch attempting to construct a railing for the stairs when I notice a weird noise. Like, a kind of droning or buzzing? And it’s getting loud. So I investigate. It’s coming from the neighbor’s yard. 

It is a metric fuckton of bees. I have never seen so many bees in my life. It is a fucking swarm of bees, and I have been reading about bees because I got a wild hair a few weeks back about wanting a hive of my own, but haven’t yet convinced Husbandthing, and there is suddenly a SWARMING HERD OF WILD HONEYBEES IN THE NEIGHBOR’S YARD.

I see postings on the neighborhood page all the time for feral swarm collection, but I also know the guy in the house across the alley just set up a hive. “Hey I think your hive escaped,” I text him. 

He calls me back about three minutes later. Turns out, the swarm he was supposed to get never came; the company went out of business and his order got cancelled, and he’d found out HALF AN HOUR AGO. And he says he’s got a friend who is a professional beekeeper, and he’s going to go pick her up and would it be okay if they came and got this swarm please please please?

So Bee Neighbor and Professional Beekeeper show up and immediately don bee suits. Apparently there is fierce competition for feral swarms, and the swarm in the neighbor’s tree is HUGE, and also twenty feet off the ground, and Bee Neighbor wants them very badly. 

The tree the bees are in is in a yard belonging to neither of us, so we go knock on the door, but there’s no answer. I knock on the house adjacent to it, but that guy’s not home either. Finally, I text the neighbor on the other side of me to see if he’s got contact info for the property owner, who is incredibly shy and in three years has never made eye contact. No luck. 

So…we trespass. We get my extension ladder, and Bee Neighbor climbs the tree while Professional Beekeeper stands on the ladder and walks him through the swarm collection. Turns out, you just shake the swarm into a box, and as long as the queen makes it into the box, the rest of the swarm will eventually follow. Bee Neighbor has never collected a swarm before (this is, in fact, his very first swarm of bees ever) and it takes the two of them the better part of an hour in the tree trying to shake the swarm into the box. 

Bees eventually get into the box. Bee Neighbor gets out of the tree without dying, and Professional Beekeeper examines the swarm and makes pleased noises. At this point, the box is the neighbor’s driveway, and about two thirds of the swarm is still milling around the box all confused. Since the neighbor isn’t home and we can’t contact him, he risks coming and parking right in the middle of a huge cloud of bees. Professional Beekeeper doesn’t want to move the box too far away, because we risk the milling bees losing the queen’s scent and never going into the box. An equidistant point between the current location and Bee Neighbor’s yard is the top of my recycling bin. 

So they put the box of bees on my recycling bin, and I text Husbandthing.

Now I have a box of bees that I am babysitting. They’re being all lazy and dopey and bumbling around. I think I might be in love. Bee Neighbor will pick the box up later tonight and put them in his hive, and then the bees will be MY neighbors too!!

THIS HAS BEEN THE BEST DAY EVER

okay but I want Link and Zelda as teachers at the same high school

  • imagine Link as a history teacher and Zelda as a law and government teacher
  • They share a wall. 
  • Zelda uses a more traditional lecture style, she teaches mostly advanced students and is generally well respected (if not a little feared. she’s kinda stern and expects a lot from her kids)
  • Link is the COMPLETE opposite. Every student in the school goes through his class, and he doesn’t have the patience (or the heart, he’s a huge softy) to reprimand anyone in the middle of his teaching
  • So he’s basically developed a strategy of acting out the history and using props to make it as active and entertaining as possible
  • He has a replica of the master sword that he swings around and uses as a pointer as well as the hat. He wears the hat every day during the Age of Heroes. 
  • Plus he has every. single. shield that every hero has used mounted on his wall above his whiteboard (he painted them himself) 
  • Anyway Link is obviously a very animated lecturer and Zelda regularly reprimands him afterwards (and sometimes DURING his class) about the fact that he and his class are being too loud and interrupting her teaching.
  • Link refuses to be put down, fondly calls her “Princess” because her name is Zelda (he’s that much of a history dweeb) and cheerfully goes back to exactly what he was doing before she started with him. 
  • Anyway one day Link pokes a bit of fun at Zelda saying that his students come from her class half asleep and he’s so loud just to get them to pay attention so maybe she should take a page out of his book
  • Zelda is NOT accepting of this information
  • He invites her to one of his classes and begrudgingly, just to prove him wrong, she goes
  • And wow. 
  • Link discussing battle strategy is the best thing she’s seen in years. He’s waving around his sword with his hat and his dopey grin and even the lowest performing students in the school are participating 
  • Of course it’s loud. They’re laughing. Students are shouting out the answers to his questions when he pauses in his re-enacting. 
  • He pulls out a fucking PIG MASK playing out ganondorf and that’s when Zelda realizes
  • yup
  • she’s in love

**Feel free to use, just don’t forget to let me know and please credit (link back to the post) 

some

BODY ONCE TOLD ME

Casually stating few facts

1. It’s been like 5 minutes into the Vlive when Kookie managed to mention Jimin
2. Like… he just started and it was already about Jimin
3. Jungkook is a sweetness in human form, the way he interacted with fans and the surprise and excitement over how many people are watching… oh my ♥
4. Jimin pretends he hears music when it’s probably impossible, I mean, through two closed doors and walls and…?
5. More likely Jimin was just stalking Jungkook’s Vlive
6. (That’s what boyfriends do anyway.)
7. Did you notice how Jungkook jumps every time he hears something from outside of the room? He literally waits for Jimin to come
8. Finally his wish comes true
9. JiKook gets into this feud about loud music
10. In other words Jungkook tries to have Jimin by him without making it obvious
11. Jimin half-heartedly plays along
12. Jungkook loves Lie. I love Lie too - coincidence? I think not. Anyway
13. Jimin is embarrassed and finally decides it’s the right time to storm in
14. With Tae as his wingman
15. Jungkook stares at Jimin’s chest. I feel you, Kookie
16. Jimin is so pretty
17. They FREAKING STARE AT EACH OTHER THROUGH CAMERA
18. Jungkook is frozen, astonished by Jimin’s beauty
19. Jimin looks at him
20. Jimin tilts his head and he leans closer
21. Jungkook finally looks at Jimin
22. Jimin leans even closer
23. They share a look full of obvious but unstated emotions
24. Tae needs to step in and cut them off since they probably will kiss
25. They snap out of their inner world, we can really see the shift in Jungkook’s amazed/attracted face when he looks at Tae like, whoa, I forgot where we are, lol
26. It ends, my heart ends too

Bonus question time:
You know how Jimin had this ring in that “my hand is all better” vid? It’s not the best quality, but anyway:

The same poor quality, but still:

Yeah, so, in my opinion it’s like (70%?) 80% chance it’s the same ring (Jimin had a similar one when they were leaving for Thailand, but that’s different one.) So either Jungkook wears Jimin’s ring, or they have a matching pair. (It’s just a conspiracy, what do you think?)

That would be all.

Have a beautiful JiKook day ♥

The Roommate Part 1 (Harry Styles Series)

Summary: Y/N is one of Harry’s friend’s roommates, Harry and her become friends and Harry falls for her.

Requested: yes

Warnings: no

A/N: Thank you to @iyanu-eniyan​ who requested this! I’m so sorry this took too long to post! (AH this gif is from in the old curly hair Harry days, my emotions)

Originally posted by stockholmhrry

The Roommate Part 1 (Harry Styles Series)

“So, the kitchen is here, the bathroom’s here, and your bedroom’s here.”  Your new roommate Noah says showing you around your new home.

“Thank you.”  You say carrying your bags into your bedroom. “Thank you for letting me stay here for the semester. I did not want to live in a dorm again. I did that for four years already.”  You say laughing.

“Yeah, I didn’t want to live on campus, during graduate school. Also, now that you are in medical school, you are going to want to be focused.”  Noah advises.

“Yup, that’s exactly why I’m here. Thank you again.” You say smiling.

“Now, that I’ve talked your ear off enough, I’ll let you unpack.” He says walking out of your room.

But before you could even open up your suitcase, Noah knocks on your door, which makes you laugh as he apologizes say, “I know that I said I was going to leave, but I just wanted to tell you that a few friends of mine will be coming over tonight. If we get too loud, just tell me, and we can go out somewhere.”

“Thank you for telling me, but I’m sure you guys will be fine. I mean, I grew up in New York City, if your noise bothers me, then you guys are really loud.” You joke.

“Okay, now I will leave you alone.” Noah says, closing the door behind him.

You shake your head, and laugh lightly to yourself at your new roommate dorkiness. After about a half an hour of unpacking, you lay down on your bed and just take a deep breath out, grab your phone and call your friend.

“Hey babe.” She says immediately when she answers, “How’s the new apartment?”

“It’s awesome, Noah is an absolute sweetheart also. I think you two would be good together.” You say wiggling your eyebrows, even though she can’t see you.

“Well, I’d love to come visit, but you are never not studying. But, wait, that would actually work, you can study and I’ll be with your roommate.” She says laughing, obviously joking around.

“I miss you though. It’s going to be weird coming home and you’re not here. Who am I supposed to come and rant to about how awful a date was that night?” You ask.

“You can call me. But, hey! You have a male roommate now, so he must have some friends and at least one of them has to be hot and nice.”

“We’ll see. His friends are coming over tonight.” You say.

“You better take a peak and not stay in your room then.”  She advises.

“I will, I will.”

“Okay, now you get your cute butt up and fix your hair and makeup cute and get yourself out there when his friend come over okay? And tell me how it goes.” She says.

“I will, I will.” You repeat, “Love you babe, and talk to you soon.”

“Love you too, and you know it.”

After you and your friend hang up, you slip under the covers and grab your book and begin to read. After about fifteen minutes, you hear the front door of the apartment open and guys come through and the close. You think about getting up, but you are so comfortable that you don’t want to leave your bed. You then close your eyes for only a few minutes, but then fall asleep. You didn’t you fell asleep until you jumped when you heard your door bang open.

“Oh my God I’m so sorry.” A tall brunette boy apologizes. “I did not mean to, uh, I thought this was the bathroom, but it’s obviously not. Also, I’m a little drunk, I’m sorry. Uh, I’ll leave you alone, have a good night.” He says awkwardly closing the door.

You are so tired that you’re not even mad and lay back down on your bed and fall right back to sleep. The next morning, you wake up feeling refreshed, which is comforting to you as this is your new home and you slept well the first night. When you walk out into the kitchen, you see the boy who accidently walked into your room last night. He looks up and sees you and smiles shyly says,

“About last night, sorry again. I was drunk and couldn’t find the bathroom.”

“No, no, no, it’s fine. I’m new here, and I’m pretty sure sober I wouldn’t be able to find the bathroom.” You joke.

“Ah, yes, you’re the new roommate! Noah has told us about you, Y/N right?” He asks.

“Yup, that’s me.” You smile, walking over the fridge to grab milk for your cereal.

“I’m Harry.” He introduces himself, putting his hand out for you to shake.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Harry.” You smile, shaking his hand looking him in the eyes. Without even thinking you blurt out, “You have really green eyes.”
After you say that, you face turns pink in embarrassment, and you ramble, “Oh my God, I don’t even know why I said that. I’m sorry.”

Harry chuckles at your embarrassment, and says, “It’s fine, I get that a lot about my eyes. Wait, I didn’t mean that in a cocky way, I mean, never mind.” Harry rambles looking down at the coffee he’s drinking.

“Well I see you two have finally met each other.” Noah says walking into kitchen.

“Or should I say, Harry you have finally met Y/N sober, and when you are not scaring her to death by barging into her room at 2am.” Noah jokes nudging into Harry.

“Again, I’m really sorry.” Harry says.

“Don’t worry about it, honestly.” You say, taking a bite of your cereal.

“Uh, so I’m going to head out. Thanks for the drinks last night, Noah, and letting me stay over.” Harry says getting up.

“Hey no problem man, see you tonight.” Noah says.

“Yeah tonight.” Harry says looking over at you. “I’m having a party at my place, and you’re more than welcome to come.”

You’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t want to go, or that you didn’t find Harry cute, but you say, “I still have a lot to do moving in here, if I’m free I’ll stop by.”

You see a flash of disappointment go across Harry’s face, which he tries to hide, but you saw it and it causes you to say, “Actually, I should be able to, I don’t have a lot of work left to do here.”

Harry smiles and you see a bit of excitement in his face that he quickly tries to hide, “Well, if you’re free, I’d love to have you over.” Harry says.
Noah clears his throat jokingly, which causes Harry to say, “And you too Noah. I guess.” Harry jokes.

“Alright, well hopefully I’ll see you both tonight.” Harry saying walking out, not taking his eyes off you, but you just smile at him and go back to eating your cereal.

“You should go to the party. I can help you today with moving in, and tomorrow. It will help you meet new people. Especially Harry, he’s a really good guy. My advice to you with medical school, study but also live.” Noah advice walking into his room.

You think about what Noah says, and finish up your cereal, rinse off the bowl and spoon and put it into the dish washer. You back to your room, and pull out your favorite outfit, it’s the outfit that makes you feel the most beautiful, the most confident. You lay it out on your bed and send a picture to your friend without saying anything. She texts back immediately saying, “Tonight’s going to be a good night.”

You smile and chuckle lightly at the emojis that she puts after that, and you say to yourself,

“Tonight’s going to be a good night.”


Part 2

Masterlist

A/N: This is going to be a series!!! I’m super excited!! I don’t know how long it’s going to be, let’s just see what happens. Thank you again to @iyanu-eniyan for the idea! Also good luck on your exams, you’re going to kill it!! Thank you to everyone that has followed me or read my stories, or anything, it means a lot. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and Happy Father’s Day to your families!!

isakbaby  asked:

do you have any fav troyson hcs? i love your troyson art (all ur art tbh) so much n so i wanted to know what you think of the characters together n all that jazz

[clenches fist] 

My favorite Troyson hcs totally seeped into my ocs,but!!

  • I like to Imagine Troy was 19 when Kent was 18; He was drafted maybe a year before Kent, so when the rest of the Aces are all Big N Gruff and kinda mean to Kent (waaay before Kent was their captain), I think he was Kent’s First Friend in the team! 
  • MmmMmmmm I also think Troy is Big and Tall?? Not Tater tall, but like, Taller Than Jack. 
  • One time, Kent and the rest of the team were hanging out and Jack was on ESPN and Kent was so distraught he had to excuse himself, and he was out in the yard having really bad Flashbacks, Troy followed him and asked him what was Up, and Kent just. Totally freaked out and told him Everything. 
  • I know some people might Scoff but Ngozi said Kent was kind of the Quiet and Modest type, and he flirts like a Nerd, so he was all, trying to be a wingman for Troy, approaches a girl at a bar, uses his thumb to point at Troy, and Troy was all, under his breath “PARSER!!!!!! NO!!!!! STOP!!!!!!!” Before Kent sticks out his tongue, and he’s all “my friend thinks you’re cute!” and Kent would look Sincere and Adorable, the girl would just end up laughing and kissing his cheek before going away
  • SO TROY IS REAALLY BAD WITH GAMES. ANY FORM OF GAME THAT ISN’T HOCKEY, HE’S BAD AT. One time he was playing Mario Kart with Kent, and he?? He kept winning? And he was all “IN YO’ FACE PARSER!!” And Kent would roll his eyes like, okay, okay. 
  • BUT THEN. CHICKENFISH GUY WOULD COME OVER, AND TROY WAS GETTING SOME ORANGE JUICE WHEN HE’D SUDDENLY HEAR LOUD, RUSSIAN CURSING?? And he’d see Kent smiling smugly as he totally Demolishes Chickenfish guy at Mario Kart
  • What I’m trying to say is, Kent lets Troy win at video games because the Big Oaf looks so cute when he’s happy. 
  • TROY LIKES THE BEACH!! Some of the aces are all Old and Grumpy and Troy and Kent bury them in the sand when they fall asleep during their Tanning Session
  • You can pry Sephardi Troy from my Cold, Withered Fingers….

Kent: NO STOP PLEASE
Troy: *sprinkles a pizza with pineapple chunks*
Kent: *warbled yodels of pain*

Kent: *bottlefeeding Kit*
Kent: take a fucking sip, babes
Troy: *slowly turning to him* Do you realise, this is why you’ll never bear any of my babies?
Kent: Good.
Kent: I don’t need you to father anyone from me. 


  • I honestly have no idea how they end up dating. But the Aces have No idea, like they’ll know Kent is seeing someone, and Troy is seeing someone, but they won’t know they’re with each other. Like an Aces Rookie would see Kent Smooching Troy while Troy was carrying their lunch, and he’d be all “CAPTAIN I RESPECTED YOU, BUT NOW YOU’RE CHEATING ON YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER HOW COULD YOU.” And Kent is all “What I have Never Cheated what are you talking about” 

Kent: I don’t like Garlic Bread
Troy: *audible pain*
Troy: you were my brother, Anakin
Troy: I loved you.

Troy: Since When Did Britney Spears and Miley Cyrus Sound This Good? 
Troy: *catches Kent’s foot tapping along to the beat of Lucky*
Troy: Ah.

2

Your boyfriend, Damon pissed you off so you decided to go to your friend, Elena’s house to cool off and vent a little. She is dating his brother, Stefan and has never been a fan of Damon because she thinks he’s a ‘dick’. But whatever, she saw how happy you are with him and although he can be a complete asshole to people, he was always good to you. 

For the time being, both you and Elena sat on her couch, did some venting here and there, then, watched a movie while eating whatever junk food she had in her cupboard. 

You two were enjoying the movie until a loud knock comes from the front door. Elena gets up to answer the door and was surprised to see that it’s Damon. Before she can get a word out of her mouth, he whispered, “can I just speak to Y/N please?”

Elena rolled her eyes at his question, then mouthed, ‘fine’ and called for you. “Hey Y/N! It’s for you!” Once she saw you get up, she walked away towards her kitchen to wash the dishes.

Walking up to the door, Damon casually had one hand behind his back and the other relaxed straight down. The first thing you did was try to close the door on his face but he dodged it by pushing the door with his hand. “Baby, come on. You can’t still be mad at me?” Damon tries to be cute by pouting and using puppy dog eyes but you didn’t fall for it.

“Of course I’m still mad. I was waiting at The Grill like a fool only to find out that you forgot all about our date! This is the second time, Damon!” You yelled, crossing your arms in disappointment.

“I know I know.” Damon put his free hand up in defense. “I promise you it won’t happen again. And you know what? Forget The Grill, how about we go somewhere else? Somewhere…better!” 

“You promise?” You asked in a demanding tone.

“Yes.” Damon smiles, then reveals a teddy bear he’s been hiding behind his back. “And teddy promises too.”

He sounded very promising and since you’re so crazy in love with Damon, you chose to forgive him. You also thought his little teddy bear trick was adorable too.

Release and Relief (Part 2 of 2)

Summary: Dean and Rowena have an arrangement that gives them both what they need.

Part 1

Warning: dom!Rowena, sub!Dean, being restrained during sex, rimming and pegging, rough sex

Word Count: 2300

A/N: I got an ask about Dean x Rowena and had never really thought about them before. I was instantly inspired to write them, and this happened. It ended up being long enough for me to break it into two parts. Hope y’all enjoy! XOXO


His turn to get fucked.

Fuck, yes.

Dean nods enthusiastically, not caring if he seems pathetic or desperate or strung out. He probably is all of those things, and that’s the beauty of it. He’s allowed to be those things here, isn’t he?

Keep reading

Kill Zone - Part 4: Into the Wild

Characters: Reader (Special Agent Y/N Singer), Dean Winchester, Special Agent Castiel Novak (mentioned), Cindy Stevenson (OC - mentioned), Ella McKenzie (OC - mentioned),   

Pairing: AU Dean x Reader (eventually)

Warnings: The usual… talk of murder, Dean being an attractive ass, nature being annoying af, heights, near death experience (sorta).

Word Count: 4800ish

A/N: This is a serial killer AU of sorts. Not the typical kind, but it has all the deaths and violence this kinda AU bring with it. It was sorta inspired by Criminal Minds and that is why my agents are profilers.

This series will have deaths, violence, love, heartwarming moments and everything in between. I am hereby warning you for yet another rollercoaster ride led by me ;)

Thanks to the amazing @percywinchester27 for being my advisor and beta on this one.

Technical terms: 

Primary Crime scene: The place where the victims were killed, as opposed to the location where the dead body was found (Secondary crime scene) after being moved, or in this case tortured before being set free and hunted.

Unsub: Unknown subject / The Killer.

MASTERLIST

You were about ready to throw the scalding hot thermo of coffee at Dean Winchester’s face when he honked the horn for the 5th time, as you were locking up and leaving your motel room. Instead you opted for the less violent solution, that is screaming over your shoulder as you struggled with your thermo and backpack while getting the key into the lock.

“I’m coming!” you hollered loud enough for him to hear, as you continued to cuss at him under your breath. “Asshole.”

Dean looked just about as happy as you felt, when you reached his car. He didn’t say a word, he just looked you up and down at you a few times, as you climbed in next to him, before he set the car in motion. His silence only succeeded in angering you further and you caught yourself thinking how in the world this man could have practically raised your kindhearted, considerate best friend through college.

“It rained a lot last night,” Dean informed, as he pull up on a dirt road leading to the mountain, making you roll your eyes at him. You weren’t a nature girl and you sure as hell weren’t a tracker, but you weren’t stupid either.

Keep reading

theclogmaster  asked:

Hello~ could I request the RFA with V and Saeran making a blanket fort with MC? 😘😘😘

aww! get ready for some fluff <3


Zen:

- you bring up the idea of making a blanket fort and he agrees

- you do the fort and he brings all the items

- and guess what it’s about to be so romantic

- he brings candles and rose petals and a condom

- his house is literally a basement but with the nicest view 

- and it’s a perfect night for you two to cuddle and stargaze


Jumin:

- doesn’t quite understand the rationale behind this because he has a huge ass bed so why in the world do you just want to sleep on a blanket

- “enough questioning Jumin just help me out” 

- you two end up with such an amazing fort that was huge and super comfortable

- wow Jumin is good at making forts

- Elizabeth the 3rd comes to join too

- spends the entire night cuddling


Jaehee:

- she is so happy and excited to be building this fort with you

- never thought that you two could have so much fun in the house at night

- she brings hot coffee while you take out snacks

- movie marathon!!

- the both of you are bundled with tons of blankets around

- it’s the best thing ever


V:

- “honey if you wanted to go camping you could’ve said so” 

- “no silly it’s not camping it’s a blanket fort!!”

- doesn’t know what to do but he watches you build the fort excitedly

- brings as many pillows as he can find in the house to the fort

- cuddles all night in the warm cozy makeshift bed


Yoosung:

- this is so fun!

- he feels like a child again even though he’s still a child

- helps you make the blanket fort and gets a flashlight too!

- you two stay up all night telling each other stories and laughing

- the horror stories is what kept you guys up


Seven:

- alright MC, this is war!

- challenges you to making a fort, whoever finishes theirs first wins

- you and him just sabotaging each other

- he started the tickle war first!

- end up sleeping on the floor in exhaustion with pillows everywhere and the blanket underneath

- the fort was never completed


Saeran:

- “okay? I don’t know what’s going on but if you like it I’ll just play along”

- it didn’t take long for the fort to be build and it was okay for a start

- you decide to play games in the small fort

- and you guys get super loud and noisy

- suddenly Seven comes in to scare you guys

- he never came back after Saeran accidentally punched him in the face whoops

So @the-moon-loves-the-sea asked for an overheard confession and honestly I had such fun with this!

In which things are said, things are overheard, and John is a bit of a nutter.

I come to a stop on the thirteenth step to 221B. Sherlock is having an argument with someone and although I’d love to be able to pretend that I’m giving my friend some privacy, I’m really not. It’s just that steps fourteen through seventeen squeak abominably and unpredictably, and I’ve always been a bit of a nosy parker. I know this about myself, and I’ve accepted it. So step thirteen is the best place to stand, if I want to…okay, if you’re going to be like that, eavesdrop. Such a nasty little word, but on the other hand, I’ve found out some fairly interesting things through eavesdropping over the years, and it’s not like Sherlock’s never-

“You should tell him,” comes Mycroft voice, light and certain through the open door.

Keep reading

4

Disclaimer: So this A-Z NSFW tag is pretty intense in my tl right now so I want to try because these photos are giving me ~feelings~.

A-Z NSFW: Nakamoto Yuta

A = Aftercare
I feel like Yuta would be the kind of guy who wouldn’t like you getting up after. He would attend to you very sweetly and will clean you after(along with occasional teasings because he just couldn’t resist), and would ask if you’re okay or sore.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite body part is his back because he loves how you crawl it. When your fingers clutch onto his back and scratch it painfully, it only turns him on more because he can feel how much you react to what he’s doing. His favorite part of yours is your stomach. He loves how smooth it feels and how it’s always ready for his ~cum~.

C = Cum
While he doesn’t pay much attention (he isn’t conscious) to it, he likes it when it’s all over you just so he could clean you up all over after too. He likes getting to touch you whenever he can.

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)
Yuta once saw you cleaning the kitchen with your apron on and your hair tied up and turned him on. He liked it so much you didn’t know it was the reason he started taking you to cosplay shops.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
While Yuta isn’t a virgin, he isn’t really experienced at all. But he knows a lot of tricks being with noonas who taught him how to properly please a woman.

F = Favorite position
Yuta likes being on top just so he could put your legs on his shoulders or circle it around his hips. He likes having you all hot and bothered and nothing to put your hands on but his back or the sheets. Also, disheveled hair? A MAJOR TURN ON.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
Yuta is very flexible and would really depend on the situation. Angry sex? He will slam you on the wall and put one of your legs on his shoulder. Cuddly making up sex? He’ll whisper sweet words and kiss your tears away. Public bathroom quickie? He would tell nonsense jokes so you would be having troubles trying to keep it down.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they)
Yuta is very well groomed. While he is a manly man, the pictures above shows no sign of a happy trail.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
Yuta is a very romantic guy but he does it in ways that are too subtle for you to notice. When you’re busy, he wouldn’t take his eyes off you but the moment you look at him, he will look way and pretend to be doing something. His phone is full of stolen pictures of you and videos of you snoring or sleeping. Before you go to sleep, when you’re half-dreaming, he would whisper sweet things in Japanese just so you wouldn’t know what it means.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation)
I feel like Yuta is a very needy man and sometimes when you’re not together he would randomly call you and the talk would eventually lead to phone sex and lots of jacking off.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
Hickeys. Yuta likes putting marks on you, mostly on your neck, the swell of your breasts, in between your thighs, and your underarms (that’s his major kink).

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)
Because you both are adventurous and exhibitionists, he likes doing it in public bathroom stalls and fitting rooms. He likes small spaces so you have not much room to move.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
Fighting. Most of your fights lead to both of you out of breath, hot and needy, that leads up to sex. Sometimes though, when you utter random Japanese words, he just loses it. But what keeps him going is you whispering how good he is in his ears or you just licking it.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
I can’t imagine turn off but I think something that Yuta won’t do is force you to do it even if you’re not feeling it. Even though he has a high libido, he respects you and wants everything to be consensual.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
One of Yuta’s highest skill is using his tongue. Not only does he use it for language, it also knows all the nooks and crannies of a woman’s genital. While he also likes being given, he only wants it if you’re up to it.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Like I said, Yuta depends on the situation. He can be pretty intense sometimes but he also knows when to be sweet and sensual.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
A lot. He just couldn’t keep it in his pants when he’s with you and he wouldn’t be able to focus on anything other than having you so you both have become accustomed to finding closed areas/spaces when out together or with friends.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
I think once you started getting comfortable with your sexual relationship, you came up with a list of things you want to try and explore and while you weren’t really serious with checking things up on said list, whenever you come across one situation that is included, you find ways to fulfill it.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
Yuta plays sports and is a very active dancer so I think he could go on all night as long as you’re up for it. While he can last long, the first round is very intense and exciting so he doesn’t last long during the first.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
Yuta’s toys are limited to blindfolds and costumes(if that counts).

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He likes pleasing you but often times when you become a pain in the ass and get on his nerves, he would tease you to the point of begging. He would pet your neck and touch you in the most extreme places (side of your breasts, your thighs) but never further, and then he would stand up and leave you hanging while he takes a bath, and then tease you further as he emerges from the bathroom naked to the day he was born.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
I imagine Yuta would make deep grunts and the occasional ‘fuck’ and ‘you’re so sexy’ and then a very deep loud grunt when he finally comes.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
The first time you crossed something on your list was when you were having a fancy dinner wth your friends and you felt hands slowly making their way under the slit of your nightgown. It suddenly dawned to you why he ‘accidentally’ bumped into your beasts earlier while preparing for the dinner. He was going slow and you were getting used to the feeling of two fingers inside you when he suddenly pushed another, making you squeal. Your friends gave you a look and you had to pretend that you bit your tongue while trying to keep a straight face. You had to stuff food in your mouth to prevent you from screaming when you eventually came, seeing a satisfied smirk on Yuta’s face.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
(I don’t know how to do this… or describe lmao) I feel like Yuta is pretty hung. Not that thick, but a bit long. (Okay, this is making me blush so I’m stopping)

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
Way up. Yuta likes sex, and he likes doing it with you. He wants to do it whenever it’s possible.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)
After he’s done cleaning you up, he wouldn’t bother getting dressed and would just slump at the bed with you, dropping his arms and legs all over you, trapping you so you couldn’t get up. 

EXO KINKS

Minseok: 

Power Plays (Daddy/Kitten/Teacher). I don’t need to go to war over this. It’s nothing we don’t already know. XiuDaddy is real and he’d love for you to bring him out. I think that Minseok would be sweet but silent most of the time, but if you started getting whinny for some reason or throwing a bit of a fit. That’s when this kink would come out. He’d make the most of the situation where in you were already in your role due to anger or frustration. He’d love seeing you like this too! Like if you were getting upset because you couldn’t reach something. He’d watch you as his kink slowly melted over his warming body. “Do you want Daddy to get it for you?” He’d finally ask, his body ready to dominate yours.

Orgasm Control. Not denial. Control. Think about it! You under him, his hands hovering over your needy body. All he has to say is “come” and you will. So. Hard. Your body will bloom under him in the best of ways and he’d get off on seeing you come at his demand. Not to mention, the training will be the best time of your life!

Rough Sex With Gentle Aftercare. This can be a confusing kink at times but it’s really quite simple. Imagine XiuDaddy fucking you so hard and fast that by the time he’s done with you and already panting beside of you, you’re still whimpering. He’ll be all covered in sweat and your hips would sting in the best ways from where he held you down. Minseok would bring you into his hot arms and hold you. He would make a shushing noise to calm you and then give you a stuffy to hold onto while you both fall asleep. Sweet right?

Luhan:

PRAISE (Giving and Receiving). Lu would love when you tell him just how good he was making you feel. How he was meant to fuck you. Your praise would have him going crazy! He’d continue to fuck you even harder until the only thing that you could do was scream for him. Luhan would also like telling you how well you were taking him or how good you felt. He’d hum his compliments in your ear as you pushed harder against him in any way you could.

Confinement. Luhan would get off on you telling him your dirty little secrets. All your kinks and fantasies, every position you wanted him to put you in. But he wouldn’t give in just then and give you what you just told him you wanted. No. He’d wait a while and when you had forgotten the conversation. BAM! Kink NO. 8 coming to get you!

Loud Sex. Loud sex, I’m talking; you screaming, him grunting, the bed frame hitting the wall hard and if the neighbors try to knock on the wall y’all won’t be able to hear him. That’s how loud he’d want you, and he’d get off on the fact that he got you there. Especially if you were a girl who usually didn’t talk much.

Yifan:

Thigh Riding. The image of you whining while you rocked yourself harder and harder onto his thigh would satisfy Yifan quite easily. He would love the way you feel on him and every single time you tried to hide your face in his shoulder. Yifan would be holding your waist or thighs, pulling you faster and closer while your arms were wrapped around his neck. He’d smile when you came and shook over him, maybe even chuckle a bit.

Praise. Yifan would love to groan in your ear about how good you taste, or how tight you feel around him. He’d also love for you to praise him. Tell him how good he’s making you feel, or how bad you want to bite him, even how good the orgasm he gave you was. Yifan will make sure to reward your compliments every. time.

Biting. Just close your eyes and think of Yifan, his head thrown back, his eyes closed. Your teeth pushing into his shoulder and the most beautiful, sexy, deep moan comes from his throat as you bite down. His upper lip would pull up and his nose would scrunch at the painful pleasure. But also! If Yifan was being impatient and just really needed you, so he was pulling off all your clothes and then he sees a mark on your side or on your collarbone that HE LEFT YOU!!!! He would loose it and become even more rough. After admiring it first, of course!

Junmyun:

Power Plays. Daddy, Baby Girl, Boss. IMAGINE JUNDADDY DRESSED UP LIKE A BOSS AND ITS LIKE THE ANNUAL REVEIW OR SOMETHING!? 
What I mean to say is: Junmyun likes role play but a special kind of role play. These roles wouldn’t just be for a one time sexy thing. If he called you into the kitchen to ask if you had done something wrong and called himself Daddy he would expect for you to pull into it so his full, Inner Daddy could come out. Junmyun would search for the kinks, like if you were getting dressed and he said, “Where something nice for me, baby girl.” or “What about the dress Daddy got for our anniversary?” .

Distractions. I could see Junmyun being really into you distracting him. He would be working on something or reading and all it would take for him to throw away whatever he was doing, would be for you to whine at him. Tell him how needy you are and how badly you want him. Tell him all the ways you’ve pictured him taking you and how it’s made you all wet. Just wait. Four seconds maximum! You will be taken by him. 

Begging. The sound of your sweet little voice begging him to go harder or faster or just to let you come already would be heaven to Junmyuns ears. If you want Junmyun to be louder, beg him. Beg him for anything because those things that you say will have him grunting uncontrollably and girl. His groans and grunts will be so worth it!

Yixing:

Body Worship. Yixing would love to pamper you. Having you lay on the bed naked in just your bra and panties. He’d wonder your body slowly, leaving a trail of kisses and licks, maybe even bites. Complements would roll off his tongue along with all the things he wants and has thought about doing to you. Especially if he hasn’t gotten to see you in a long time. *wink face*

Moans. Your moans will be heaven to Yixing. Yixing is the type of person to do whatever his partner would want. Anything he could do to please you. He’d get off on the sounds you made because it means that he’s doing a good job at pleasing you. Yixing would love your sounds so much that he’d ignore room service when he hears the knocks on the door and giving you three or four orgasms just because he doesn’t want your pretty sounds to stop. 

Over Simulation. You come again and again. Once over his lips, twice over his fingers. Now Yixing’s looking down at your shivering body, his lip between his teeth, his groan still ringing through your ears…and then he moves back down. His lips traveling between your breasts and down to your extremely sensitive core once again. You could try to tell him that you couldn’t do anymore, but he won’t hear you. His lips would pull on your soft clit with a groan and your body would start searching for another orgasm.

Beakhyun:

Teasing (Receiving). If you were wearing one of his sweaters, with some high socks and really short shorts, maybe even just panties when the guys came over. It would tease the shit out of him! Beakhyuns insides would boil when you bent over, the desire to take you right now, right there would be one almost too strong. Beakhyun would be so turned on when you showed him just what he wanted, but just what he’d have to wait for. Post-Party sex with Beakhyun would be the best thing ever! He’d also love you teasing him with oral a LOT. And you know you would enjoy it too!

Attention. Beakhyun loves attention and will always want to be the center of yours. If you gave him a lot of attention, especially around other people, he’d eat it UP. The thought that you could be talking with Chanyeol or Junmyun but you stayed to sit on his lap (which would be another perfect way to tease him) and talk to him. Beakhyun would always let you know that you were the only one for him as well. No matter who else was in the room.

Cowgirl. Maybe you’re thinking, “what are you doing that’s a position not a kink”. WRONG! It is a kink for Beakhyun! He fucking loves when you ride him! With a bra, without a bra, it doesn’t matter. As long as you’re riding him real good and letting him touch you where ever he wants and you’re both moaning and groaning. That’s all he needs, imaging it would probably make him come.

Jongdae: 

PHONE SEX. Jongdae on the phone! Let me go! He would love the thought of calling you from a different time zone and demanding to know what you’re wearing for him. He’d call every night of he could. The thought of you dropping everything you were doing to touch yourself as he tells you where to pinch and when to curl your fingers would possess his thoughts. Just don’t get me started on his phone voice and how he would groan into the ear piece just to give you a harder time.

Teasing. Ohhhhhh yes. Jongdae would tease the shit out of you. Until your body was shaking and you’re begging him to let you come and then he’ll just continue. Jongdae would use his mouth, his fingers, toys, words, anything he could to tease you and let you know just how much he can do you and your poor little body.

Bonding/Pinning. I’m counting these as one because with Jongdae everything can happen! Jongdae would thrive under the thought of pushing you onto the bed and bringing your hands above your head in one of his, the other one starting to roam your body as he whispers questions at your neck. You know what you should do?!?! You should find a way to bind yourself to the bed or sofa or coffee maker, it doesn’t matter. but tie yourself up and blindfold yourself and then wait for him to come home because that would be Jongdaes SHIT!

Chanyeol:

Voyeurism. As much as Chanyeol would love to tell you to touch yourself while he watched you and his eyes just got darker and darker with lust and desire, he’d love if he didn’t have to. If he were to walk in on you felling yourself up, he would absolutely get off on it. He’d stay quiet by the door, watching you as your fingers moved faster and your face scrunched in concentration, until he just couldn’t take it anymore. Chanyeol would always have to hold back the urges to touch you himself, but that struggle would turn him on even further.

Light Bondage. Just a blindfold, a simple scrap of cloth over your eyes could do so much to Chanyeol. The fact that he wouldn’t have to shift his gaze because he had been looking at you for too long, he could look at you for as long and however he wants to. Or maybe just one of your hand is tied up? Chanyeol would need one of your hands free so you could touch him and scratch him and pull his hair. He’d love that. But that one arm would assure him that he is in control and you’re not going anywhere with out him allowing it. You are his and you are staying with him. 

Biting/Scratching. The feeling of your nails against his skin would cause Chanyeol to release the most satisfied groans you’d ever hear. He’d love the feeling of your hands or teeth pushing hard into his flesh. Also, Chanyeol would love to scratch and bite you. His fingertips leaving their mark on your thighs and his teeth on your side or shoulder. You two would put aloe vera on each others battle wounds the next day and all Chanyeol would be able to think about would be giving you more of them.

Kyungsoo: 

Power Plays. Kyungsoo would like being in control even if you were on top. He’d hold your waist and push his own up and lead. He would lead you so well. Kyungsoo would get off on the fact that he was the power player in the relationship. He gets to call the shots. Kyugsoos power plays wouldn’t just be for the bedroom. He’s gonna expect you to carry out the fantasy in everyday life. That will make it more real for both of you. So when he calls and says “Come over, baby. I’ve got something planed for you.” Dig into the fantasy and let Kyungsoo take you the rest of the way.

Reactions. Your reactions will be very important for Kyungsoo. He’s not going to want you to be too loud. However, he will want you to enjoy yourself. Kyungsoo will love the image of you arching your back underneath him and scratching at his forearms, moaning his name. All of that will do so much to him and Kyungsoo will always make sure you mean every sound and movement you make.

Make Outs. His lips. On yours. For as long as he wants. Kyungsoo will make out with you every chance he gets! The feeling of your smaller lips on his would have his eyebrows pushing up, but even more than that. Exploring your mouth would never get old to him. Kyungsoo knows what he’s doing with your mouth and he would show you for hours. By the time he starts moving towards the bed room, your lips will be bright red and so swollen. His groans and your moans will fill each others mouths and it will just be the most beautiful thing!

T.A.O: 

Hair Pulling. His hand would twist in your hair and pull it back with a groan as he thrusts into you. Tao would love the whine he gained from pulling your hair as well as the control to shift you in any way he wants!

Strip Shows. If you slowly took off every single piece of clothing and let Tao watch, he’d fall in love with you all over again. He’d sit really pretty in his chair with his hand holding up his face and hiding just enough of his emotion. He’d watch you as you turned your back to him to hide the redness of your face. When you turn back his eye will be hungry and you will continue to strip for him until you are wearing nothing and then as you turn to walk away he will stand and come up behind of you…

Loud Sex. Tao is gonna want you to be loud for him in bed. The louder the better. It tells him he’s doing a good job and that you like it, you like him, he’s the one doing this to you, he’s gonna love that power. 

Jongin:

Whispers. Imagine dark, strong, sexy arms pulling you back against his toned chest. Jongins face coming to your neck with a groan. You hear as he parts his lips, your eyes already closed and your mouth already falling open. “Did you miss me?” His deep rough voice would push into your ears as he starts kissing your neck. His arms holding you firmly. Or maybe you’re just siting on the sofa, reading, when Jongin come over and kneels beside your head. “I’m going to get us a drink and then I’m going to my room. Be there. Naked.”

Sweat. Jongin would love the look of your body covered in sweet, sweet sweat. If he was watching you lay on the bed with your hands above your head and a vibrator plugged into you and you’re having your third orgasm. He’s not gonna let it end until he’s ready to come touch you and he’s not gonna be ready until you’re dripping. In every way. Or if you were under him, sweating as he put you into every possible position. If Jongin could see you drip with sweat it would make him crazy. He’d bare his teeth, growl, maybe even bite you. Don’t be surprised if Jongin takes you to a warmer room and then holds you under the covers while he fucks you senselessly until you can’t breathe anymore but he says you can’t get air until you come for him again.. Okay I just need this in my life.

Quietly Loud Sex. Like you guys are fucking like it’s part of the Olympics but y'all are in a simi-public place or another member is home. Those moans and groans that go right in the other persons face. Thats that shit I’m talking about! Jongin would love to see your face as you silently scream and all the scratching and biting that’ll happen to make up for it. Please sign me up.

Sehun:

Public Make Outs. Sehun wouldn’t care if anyone saw you two make out. If you were over to watch a movie and the other members were in the living room with you but he wanted to kiss you. He would. I mean full on, tongue down your throat, loud groaning, hands pulling you closer, you on your tiptoes kind of  kissing. He’s not going to hold back, if anything he’s going even harder. Depends on who it is in the room with you two but nonetheless, expect him to have you out of breath.

Dominance. Sehun is in charge. He tells you what to do and you do it. That gets Sehun feeling so damn good. But, I think you should play with him a bit. Falter, if you will. Say, Sehun tells you to take off your shirt, don’t do it right away. This will drive him mad, in the best way, and cause him to act. Of course, you being a good girl would be lovely and he would love how quickly you obeyed him. But if you tested him and gave him a moment to express how he was the Dom. I know he’d fucking love that shit!

Surfaces. If you ever see Sehun staring at wall or counter, don’t worry, he’s just thinking about fucking you against it. He’d walk up to a wall and pull his hand out of his pocket to run it over the surface and then he’d chuckle, either he has taken you against that wall before, or he’s about to.

Bringing some quality content your way.

Story time:

On our way back home from a food run, my brother heard a strange noise.

Note that just minutes before we tried and failed to rescue a black kitten that was stuck on the other side of an enclosed parking lot. It was fairly young and on the other side was a highway. We threw some food to try to get it to come closer and fell short each time. The loud noises of the highway helped no one. At some point we tried to get the attention of a security guard that was making his rounds but were ignored. We eventually gave up after a solid hour.

Back to the noise.

We crossed the highway and were almost to the street we lived on. Suddenly he heard it, a tiny mew. At first we thought it was the same kitten as before. I meowed at it to show dominance (see if she would get closer). Much to the surprise of my brother– I can have talents too HAROLD–, it worked. This small little bugger came up to us. We figured that the two must have been litter mates.

Determined to not scare this one away we took some time to earn her trust.

After 3 SOLID HOURS, we got her to follow us as she absolutely refused to be held. Like an some sort of odd family of ducklings, me and my brother walked in a line, where we were on either end with the kitten in the middle.

We had to stop several times in order to make sure she followed. There were times that she followed almost TOO closely and we each almost stepped on her several times. We eventually got home to an exasperated mother to whom we failed to mention the newest addition.

Thankfully, and with the long suffering that my brother is starting to understand comes from dealing with keeping something from accidently killing itself, my mother agreed to let us keep her.

Meet Amber! She is using my brother as her bed now and he has no say in it.

We kids with strict parents all know that moment when you’re supposed to be doing something but your fat-ass is just laying on your bed and then you hear loud footsteps coming towards your room and you get up as fast as you possibly can, like so fast that usain bolt would be proud, and dash to the other side of the room to make it look like you’ve been hard at work like one of snow whites dwarfes at the diamond mines, when in reality, you are a scared, and tired squirrel that just wants to eat nuts, be fat, and sleep all winter.

anonymous asked:

Who do you think is responsible for the censorship of sanvers, the writers or the CW? I'm inclined to believe it's the latter. I feel like this is probably standard practice for various networks with "family" shows, but I'm seeing a lot of anger directed towards the writers specifically, and I don't know if it is the most productive thing. Not that the writers shouldn't be criticized for other things.

society?

[this got very long]

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