colleague

同僚の健康状態に関するゲスで残酷な見解

同僚が抑鬱状態を発症し、2ヶ月もシゴトを休んでいる。このまま休職するのかもしれない。5年ほど同じチームで働いていた仲間だったので、わたくもショックを受けている。

ヨメの話だと、デンワもメールもない環境で、1日3回の食事を時間通りに摂り、あとは横になっているだけの状態が丸2ヶ月。もちろん専門の医師による治療を受けている。シゴトを連想させることから遠ざけているとのことだ。そこからどうやって元の生活に戻れるのか、わたくしには想像することすら出来ない。

以下、わたくしのゲスで残酷な見解。

彼はケコーンしてから明らかに健康状態が悪くなった。元々筋肉質で体格の良かった彼なのに、見る見るうちにゲッソリしていったのだ。昼食はいつも菓子パンを2個だけ。昼休みになるとコンビニの袋からコッペパンみたいなのをゴソゴソ取り出してはかじっていたものだ。ウチに帰っても食事の用意はなく、毎月のお小遣いは2万円しかないとこぼしていた。

ヨメは有機野菜などの食材を宅配してもらっていたらしいが、それを使った料理を口にしていたのはヨメとコドモだけで、世帯主である彼は少ない小遣いからコッペパンを買って食べるしかなかった。

と同時に、アトピーがどんどん酷くなり、顔に赤黒い斑が広がっていく様子がとても痛々しかった。おそらく彼は治療していなかったと思う。昼食はもとより、彼自身にかかる経費は2万の小遣いでまかなわないといけないのだと日頃から嘆いていた。たまに職場で支給される弁当を喜んで食べていたのを思い出す。

食生活だけではない。いつもくたびれたシャツやネクタイを着用していたし、スーツも一年中同じものだった。独身時代は自家用車で通勤していたのに、ケコーン後、クルマはヨメとコドモ専用になった。

こんな状況で、彼は家庭で心休まるときがあったのだろうか。シゴトを休むことも大切だが、それ以上に今すぐ家庭のあり方を見直すべきではなかろうか。

ヨメは、病状が長引くことによる生活の不安を訴える。だが、所帯を持った以上、ダンナもコドモも自分で働いて食わせるぐらいの気概がなくてどうする。このままではヨメに三行半を突きつけられそうな同僚が気の毒で仕方がない。

Meeting Sebastian

First time I saw this I thought, Sebastian is a douchy old classmate of Sherlock’s.  That’s why he acts weird.  He’s just cheesy.  John is mad about doing the shopping while Sherlock luxuriates at home, so he’s not too happy with him, hence the, ‘colleague’, comment.

Now, I think, Seb is an ex of Sherlock’s.  (Not necessarily that they literally went out but that they were both interested and had feelings for each other).  He clearly still has the hots for him and is obviously like, 'hey, this is your new guy!’, and then, is like, 'damn, your new guy just shot you down!  awkward!’.  If John can tell that this is Sherlock’s way of trying to make his ex jealous, and he feels like, 'fuck that, if you want to introduce me as your boyfriend, you could at least bone me’, then he’s like, 'um, not that label, something less than that label’, hence, 'colleague’.  

Is it a romantic gesture to introduce John in this context?  Or is he just trying to use John to make some sort of point to Sebastian?

The choice of words when Sebastian says he hasn’t, 'clapped eyes on’, Sherlock in a while is interesting.  Considering how beautiful he looks in this scene.  

Notice Sherlock’s intense, familiar eye contact.

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Seb: 'I’m very happy to see you, Sherlock.  Even though, you’re not naked…’

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Sherlock: “I’m at my sexiest and tersest, here, for some reason.  On an unrelated note: I’m totally over you.”

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Sherlock: “I like this guy, now.”

Seb: 'New guy, eh?  ladida!’

John: “Yeah, not really, though.”  

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Seb: 'alright, awkward.  For you’.  

Sherlock: *looks at watch, makes narly deductions, while also being simultaneously crushed and mortified*  

John: “awkward but that guy neither bones me nor helps with the shopping, so…  there are limits.  I’d kiss him right now if he’d let me but he doesn’t so, fuck it." 

*

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Seb: 'Sit down, bitches.  I’m going to preach.  Want anything?  Water, coffee?  Your dignity back?  No?  Okay.  Just like the good old days.’  

Sherlock: "Fuck that, I’m going to impress John with my latest deduction; that’ll shut you up.  He fucking loves it when I do my thing”.

*

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'Sorted? Hardly.  This guy’s still my boyfriend.  He might not know it yet but… he is.’

*

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Seb: 'yeah, let’s send out this girl in purple.  Lilac, whatever.  Don’t worry, she’s an ally, she’s like the Mrs Hudson of this office.  ;)  Besides, we got enough love triangle in this room without her.  Am I right?  Or am I right?’

Sherlock: “ahem, I’m about to deduce the crap out of you.  Get ready, son”.

*

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Seb: 'oh, man, here it comes!  You’re going to give me a boner, while making me feel like a dumb piece of shit and looking awesome in front of your new not-boyfriend…’

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John: “He’s going to show off, now, right.  Wait, why is he showing off, now?”

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Seb: 'Oh, man, why does this always give me a boner?  My love/hate is so palpable, I’m just oozing it.  My face must look like a cross between Jack Nicholson playing the Joker and Bruce Campbell playing Ash…’

*

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Sherlock: “It’s not a trick: I am legitimately awesome.”

John: “Well, that’s true.  I’m basically in love with this guy and I’ve only just met him, so, yeah, he’s awesome”

*

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Seb: 'Cool, now I look like an actual villain.  Maybe I’m the biggest villain of this whole show.  Or maybe I’ve just still got the hots for this massive jerk/loser.  I wish I didn’t need to call him but damn, he looks good!’

*

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John: “I feel you, man.  It’s annoying how smart he is.  While being so hot.  The uncontrollable boners he gives you: super annoying.  I get it, trust me.”

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Seb: 'He used to give us all boners.  We hated it.’

*

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Seb: ’He wouldn’t fuck us and he’d also not let us fuck anyone else, either!  What the hell?’

(John: “that sounds familiar…”)

Sherlock: “I don’t understand.  Why is he so mean to me? I was just trying to impress him…”

*

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Sherlock: “I simply observed.”  (I was simply being myself!)

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Seb: 'Well…  Yourself is devastating!  Go on, devastate me!  Show me how incredible you are while telling me that my hair is stupid and my job sucks and I’ll still have a boner, you beautiful monster!’

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John: “He totally IS devastating!  You get it!”

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Sherlock: “Oh, you want me to be hot and clever?  Well, in that case: I decline.  BURN!”  (Bonus: 'that’s hotter and cleverer than any of y'all saw coming.  Yeah, I say, 'y'all’, sometimes.  Mostly in my head, but still…’)

*

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John: “Burn!  I didn’t know that the devastation had another level.”   

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Seb: 'Yeah, well, I tangled with the master and failed.  Don’t know why I tried to sass you when you clearly always win, you magnificent bastard!’

*

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Sherlock: “I still got it.  But… why are you always so mean to me?  Oh, fuck it.”

*

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Seb: 'Oh, man!  You really are delightful!  How I’ve missed our witty repartée!  I’m genuinely glad you see you, you prickly bastard!  I wish I had new guy’s patience to stick around indefinitely until you thaw.’  

(Sherlock: “ummm, I was fully thawed, for your bullshit, years ago, you dumb fuck!)

*

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Seb: 'Anyhow, there’s been a thing…  A thing with a break-in…  It’s…  crime…  something like that…  Is that up your alley, old chap?  It’s a locked room mystery but it’s clearly not about the three of us, in any way…’

Sherlock: "Cheerio!  I love a good mystery!  Like, 'why’d you never like me?  And, 'why’re you always so mean to me?’  …I tried so hard to impress you with my deductions and all you ever did was hate on them…  well, on me…”

*

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Sherlock: “what was the little message?”

Seb: 'someone carved, 'Seb & Sherlock’, into this desk over here…  That’s odd, isn’t it?  j/k, I know it was you!  Remember when I stole your heart?  lol yeah, I just called it, 'nothing’, BURN!’

*

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Seb: 'I have a key to this very important door.  No symbolism, here.’

*

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Sherlock: 'Agreed.  This case is clearly not about the three of us.  So, yeah, let’s just have a look-see…’

*

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Sherlock: “you’re not in the picture anymore.  John is .  Just literally I mean, of course.”

*

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Sherlock: “I reject you.  I mean, your money.  I reject your money.”

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Seb: 'Well-played!  You still got it!’

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John: “Yeah…  I’m his not-boyfriend, as per our awkward introduction, so I’m just going to go ahead and take that, mmmkay??  Oh, good.”

Seb: 'Cool, giving you this money doesn’t make me feel wistful or disappointed or jealous or anything like that…’