coley post

Guys I figured out why I love Greg Universe, especially young Greg, so much. Big city guy with big dreams ends up in a small town. 

Falls in love with a local woman.

Befriends her young charge.

Is disliked by some of her friends

He marries the girl and she dies giving birth to a kid destined to save the world.

Even the long hair just


The thing I love about this is that it means Dirk didn’t just let Vriska put Equius into his kernelsprite. He only acquiesced to put the shades in. 

So when this happened.

It means she didn’t put him at that point in time. Here she confronts Dirk, suggests it to him, and he’s obviously not thrilled with the idea. I had previously guessed she must’ve convinced him somehow or just tossed it in right then and there whether he liked it or not. But no. It happened when his back was turned. Meaning Dirk had to have prevented her from doing it somehow, to the point where she had to leave. Yeah, Vriska. and then be sneaky about it and come back at some point when he wasn’t paying attention. 

I mean maybe she just decided it wasn’t worth it to fight him over it and did it to keep her involvement down. But I love the idea of him bein’ all like “Oh hell no.” and trying to shoo her away, or him playing goalie in a frantic game of Equiusheadball, or maybe bribing her like he did with Gamzee (only with treasure or Nic Cage stuff if he has any). 

Anyway, it makes me happy to know that Dirk didn’t just roll over and let Vriska do what she wanted with his sprite. ‘Cause even if it was someone as relentless as her, I always thought it didn’t match the character of someone as relentless as Dirk. 

I really hope Dirk being part of the fight means he’s going to employ the help of his robots against Lord Jack. I don’t know about Squarewave, but Sawtooth definitely packs a punch. He may even send him to help with one of the other fights.

But I also hope they use Zillywave and Sawhoo.

Given that they’re made with the same cherub magic that made the other legendary cherub weapons and Lord Jack is arguably infused with cherub power, they may have an advantage over him. 

And I also hope Dirk finally uses his fancysantakind strife specibus.

And makes use of all the Zilly Santas they made too.

He could weaponize his entire sylladex with these things and just rap them out at LJ one after the other, like a silly zilly machine gun.

Alpha Timeline Important Events
  • 1910: John and Jade (Poppup Crocker and Grandma English) arrive.
  • 1970's: Rose and Dave (Dirk's Bro and Roxy's Mom) arrive.
  • 1995: Jake arrives.
  • 1996: Jane's arrival, Poppup's death.
  • 2000-ish: Jake's Grandma is assassinated.
  • 2011: Betty Crocker rebranding, The Condescension reveals herself to humanity.
  • 2011-2024: Media and government systems break down, Guy Fieri rises to power and becomes High Chaplain of Interstellar War.
  • 2024: Jay and Dope elected as the first dual presidents of the United States.
  • 2024-2036(?): Juggalo administration serves several terms, begins the Hilarocaust.
  • 2036(?): Dirk's Bro kills Presidents Jay and Dope, Roxy's Mom kills Guy Fieri, The Condescension assumes control.
  • 2036(?)-2400(?): Dirk's Bro and Roxy's Mom confront and are killed by the Condesce, the Condesce tries and fails to rebuild troll race, enforces troll-like reproduction and child rearing upon humanity, melts the ice caps and floods the earth, the human race goes extinct.
  • 2409: Dirk and Roxy arrive.
  • Gathered this info from Dirk's history lesson starting on page: through Also Rose's timeline on page