I mean, I don’t really approach movie viewing that way, meaning: If something is not my speed I will just stop watching, or if forced to complete viewing it I’ll just forget it?? And there are A LOT of really objectively awful movies I love, because I’m always looking for that FIX, you know, so I think I’m a good viewer in that sense, like, I am eager to approach a movie on it’s own terms … But okay, so that I don’t totally cop out on your question, in general I don’t like:
––movies that seem to have been made by committee or marketing department (insert romance here, insert grumpy teen character here, etc.)
––movies that are really character-driven or talky or based on plays. Theatre is MUCH better at doing this, I want cinema to be CINEMATIC and exploit the things movies do best. Visuals, sound design, creating a dream-like experience, glamour, beauty, ingenious editing, sitting in the dark and entering other worlds.
––movies that are a cynical exploitation/amalgamation of other, better films. While I’m all about a good post-modern movie about movies, I loathe movies that clumsily try to capitalize on another film or film trend.
And basically I’m game for almost anything else, but I guess mostly I want to be transported in some way? So something that fails to do so for any variety of reasons, I will hate or worse, be bored by.
Also? Though, worst of all I hate the Uncooperative Cop. The character who exists solely to clumsily and illogically (within the logic of that story anyway) thwart the protagonist by just being annoyingly uncooperative or obstinate, like, a scientist in an action sci-fi film is speeding in a car toward the observatory becayse she’s the only one who can save the world? And a cop pulls her over, amidst like meteors smashing into houses all around them? And is like, “Ma’am, do you have any idea how fast you were going?” And the scientist calmly presents her credentials and points out the meteors smashing everything, and the cop is still like, “Durp dee doo, I don’t care for your tone ma’am, you’re under arrest.” Hate that shit. Even good movies have UCs, like Die Hard, there is the helpful cop that shows up first? But then there’s the doofus who shows up and is like, “Well now, we don’t know who this John McLean is, never mind he’s our only shot at saving a hundred lives, just allow me to try to illogically fuck this up for everyone for no goddam reason whatsoever.” Hate that.
“It’s all a bit of a gamble, mate. That’s all I can promise you. And we never get to see what that other life would have looked like if we don’t take chances. You know what I did on the day before I started at this job? A practice run on the Tube from Convent Garden to Arsenal. I was miserable Joe sitting on the Tube, homesick for you all, honestly thinking of packing my shit up and flying back to Georgie’s place and meditating in her attic for the rest of my life. I’d been here for almost six months and nothing had happened. And I was praying, Tom. I was praying for a sign. I was so close to being a no-show the next day. But thank God I went through with it because every day, now, I sit on the Tube and think I almost missed out. Just say I didn’t know I was twelve minutes away from the rest of my life. Twelve minutes away from meeting a bunch of the most decent kids I’ll ever teach. Twelve minutes away from meeting my girl.”
I was reminded tonight that in 2007 Canada made a 100 Kilo pure gold coin (it weighs 220 lbs!!, it’s heavier than *I* am) with a face value of $1,000,000 (the melt value on the gold content alone is currently $4,333,410.90).
Why? Just to show off that they could. For literally no other reason. They wrote press releases and uploaded videos and everything just saying “look how awesome we are at minting coins”.
A pure fluff story idea that I began to think of today.
Coin Laundry: It’s late and they’re the only two in the Laundromat that night. He’s staring at the washing machine, looking so confused, and Beth can’t help but go up to him and offer him her help. She shares her Tide with him and he gives her one of his extra quarters when she needs it for the dryer. They sit and talk until their clothes are all done and folded away. Daryl can’t stop staring at this pretty girl and she keeps smiling and laughing as if she thinks he’s the funniest guy she’s ever met. And Daryl finds himself prepared to do pretty much anything to keep that smile on Beth Greene’s face.