click through for where i found it


For anon…enjoy!

“So, I might be able to stop by,” your boyfriend stated over the phone.
“Really?” you asked in surprise, “Are you sure your boss won’t mind?”
You could hear his smile through the phone. “That’s actually why I’m in town.”
“You’re already in town?” you chittered.
“Yeah. Driving to work right now, actually.”
Tony, your coworker, drove over a speed bump. “Ow!”
“What? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, Spence. My idiot coworker decided to speed over a speed bump.”

You smacked Tony’s chest from the passenger seat. He smirked while raising a brow. You rolled your eyes. You realized how close you were to the crime scene.

“I have to go,” you told Spencer, “I’ll call later so we can meet up.”
“Of course,” he agreed before whispering, “I love you.”

You smiled softly before remembering your coworkers were in the same car.

“You too,” you stated shortly, “I’ll see you later.”

With that, you hung up. Feeling Tony and Ziva’s stares on you made you sigh.

“You seeing someone, Y/N?” Tony teased.
You clenched your jaw to hide the blush. “Shut up, DiNozzo.”
Ziva laughed. “He’s incapable.”
“I’m just curious about this ‘Spence’ you were talking to,” the man defended, “Nothing wrong with learning a little about each other’s personal lives.”

You and Ziva shared a devious glance. She leaned forward, arching a brow.

“Is that so, Tony?”
The man nodded. “Yeah. It’s like learning each others favorite colors.”
“So,” you began to drawl, “you wouldn’t mind sharing where you sprinted off to last night?”
“More like leapt,” Ziva chimed.
Tony swallowed, parking the car. “Oh look, we’re here.”

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Worth The Wait- Stuart Twombly

Author- @maddie110201

Pairing- Stuart x Reader

Words- 6,249 (uhhhhh)

Warnings- mentions of sexual assault (PLEASE DO NOT READ IF EASILY TRIGGERED), smut, fluff, swearing, idk of anything else

AN: I stated this months ago but decided to finish it and post it for Stu week! I really hope y’all enjoy this because i’m super proud of it!

Also, thanks to @dylan-trash-tbh for proofreading this for me. I love you, Bee!!!! <3 And also a big thanks to @thelittlestkitsune for keeping me motivated and believing me!!!!! ;P

Originally posted by dylanholyhellobrien

It was a Thursday night in the middle of August. The weather outside was rainy and cold and I could hear the sound of the wind rustling against the windows. I was sat alone in the library of my university, the only other person here being the little old librarian. She reminded me of my grandma: sweet and funny, and she always smelled like cinnamon. She also told the best stories, her stories.

I got up to put the book that I had just finished in the drop box.

“Finished already sweetheart? Didn’t you just start reading that about two hours ago?” I heard her sweet voice speak up.

I chuckled lightly, “I am. But you know me, I love to read.” I spoke softly. It was true though, the minute I open a book, I get lost in the beautiful words that litter the tattered pages.

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I Give Up - part 26 (A Baekhyun Series)

The bedroom door closed with a click and you were halfway out of the bed scrambling in much of the same way as Baekhyun had before he vanished through the bedroom door.

You tried to move as silently as possible and you found your clothes from yesterday on the bathroom floor. Hygiene be damned, this was an emergency.

You heard his voice through the door, much too close to where you sat with your heart in your throat on the edge of the bed.

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Hello, friends! I’ve had a few people interested in finding out how I made these gradual-colour gifs I posted recently, so I thought I’d do a tutorial for anyone who wants to give it a go :)

As I’ve mentioned before I didn’t use a tutorial myself, I just figured out my own way of doing it using my Photoshop/gif knowledge and an existing gifset as a guide. I also had to work around a few Photoshop glitches I usually struggle with, so my way might be slightly over-complicated ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) But anyway let’s get started!

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If I Believe | two

Summary: Following the events of Song of Themyscira, will Diana, Y/N, and James be able to work together to do what is right for humanity? || sequel series

Pairing: James ‘Bucky’ Barnes x Amazon!Reader

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: Language

A/N: update! this series will be a slow burn just like SoT, so prepare yourselves. s/o to mi amor abril for just being amazing, as always || masterlist

Originally posted by pinkywinky44

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I’ll Love You, Always (Part 1)

Story summary: After finally realizing that you and Dean are a bad pair, you decide it’s time to leave him, Sam, and the bunker; to be with Cas.

A/N: I hope you guys like this! It was just one of those ideas that came to me so, here it is!

Pairing: Castiel x Reader

Warnings: Language, Angry Dean

Word Count: 1.4k

Originally posted by hiddened

You made your way down the hallway, each step you took getting heavier and heavier. The air around you felt cold compared to the bunker’s usual hot and stuffy atmosphere.

This was it. You were really doing this. You stopped just outside your bedroom and opened the door.

There was no going back now.

“Dean-” you said, taking a deep breath as you leaned against the doorframe, getting his attention.

Hmm?” he stood up from your bed where he sat, looking at his phone and walked over with a small smile on his face. He tried to kiss you, but you pulled away- “What’s wrong?”

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Someone to Stay - AU

Previous Chapters

Chapter 11


“I can’t.”

“Dammit, Joe!” Claire slammed her fists on the dashboard.

“LJ, there’s a speed limit. Your plane isn’t leaving any earlier than scheduled. Calm down!”

Claire sighed and fumed, curling up in the passenger seat. She drummed her fingers against the window until another murderous look from Joe made her stop with a huff.

As soon as she had realized her mistake, she was on Joe’s phone, dialing Jamie from memory. But it had gone straight to voicemail. Joe had plucked his mobile from Claire’s hands before she could hurl it against the wall too.

He had dialed Jenny’s number instead, and put Claire on immediately.

“Jenny? Oh God, I’m an idiot, I’m so sorry—”

“It doesna matter. It will work out,” Jenny said gently. “Right now, though, I need ye to get on a plane to Edinburgh. I’ve left an open ticket for ye at Gatwick, so please come as soon as ye can. Jamie’s back since yesterday, and he’s a mess.”

“So am I,” Claire gulped.

“He needs ye, Claire. As I’m sure ye need him” Jenny’s voice had gone quiet, and Claire had snapped out of her funk, racing to her room to pack.

“I’m on my way.”


The stupid train was faster than driving, she reminded herself, as it sped across the Scottish countryside.

From Inverness, she called Jenny from her new burner phone to be picked up. Then to Lallybroch. And Jamie.

As the driver Jenny had sent parked in front of the manor house, Claire jumped out, feet pounding on the gravel. Jenny threw open the kitchen door and embraced her fiercely. With a simple, “Go!” Claire bolted up the stairs. Closer.

Heart pounding, Claire knocked on the door to Jamie’s room. She could hear the strumming of his guitar, which didn’t stop, and then his voice called out.

“Jenny, go away.” Dejected, forlorn.

Claire swallowed hard. “It isn’t Jenny. It’s me, Claire.”

The guitar twanged abruptly. Footsteps and a pause.


“May I come in?”

A beat. Two beats.

Claire fully expected him to tell her to go away too. She turned to oblige before he could do so, heart in her mouth, tears stinging.

Then a flurry of activity, trampling sounds, a couple of shits thrown in for good measure. And finally, a click and twist and the door swung open.

His eyes were bright as he looked at her, fingers gripping the door. Claire looked up at him through her eyelashes, unsure of where to begin. But at the beginning seemed best.

“I’m sorry. I believe you. I saw the picture. Joe and Jenny and…” Claire sighed, frustrated with her incoherence. “I looked closer. I noticed the ring. I’m here.”

Without warning, she found herself crushed against Jamie’s chest, and her hands clutching at him equally as tight.

“Claire, mo nighean donn, I’m sorry too. When Murtagh showed me the paper, I flew back to London. I knew it would be a blow, despite the lie.” Jamie brought her into the room and shut the door behind them.

They still hadn’t released each other. Jamie stepped back briefly, brushing Claire’s wild curls away from her face as she shook her head and laughed in relief—sweet sweet relief that flooded through her and wiped away all doubts.

Tha gaol agam ort?” she whispered, her own hands tangled in his hair.

Jamie smiled. “Always.”


“Thank you Edinburgh!” The answering clamor was deafening.

Claire grinned broadly from the wings, clapping her hands along with the crowd. The venue lights dimmed suddenly to blue. The backdrop of Edinburgh Castle was spectacular, the esplanade packed with fans all the way to the top tiers of the grandstands.

“Thank you, everyone.” Jamie took a seat on a stool and palmed a beautiful Gibson acoustic, with a tortoiseshell inlay that Claire had given him for his birthday. He laid it across his lap and touched the strings slowly. He managed to catch her eye and winked in his usual fashion – more like a nodding blink.

Claire laughed and blew him a kiss, as he turned to the audience and said, “This one is new. It goes out to the love of my life.”

He strummed out the intro chords, and sang.

Falling doesn’t come easy
It all takes time
To give someone your heart
I saw the walls, began to climb

You only wanted someone to stay
To be there for you
To hold you close and say
I won’t let go
I promise I’ll be
Someone to stay

Jamie rose suddenly as Willie took over with another guitar, keeping the same riff going over and over. Jamie walked purposefully towards Claire, and before she knew it, he had pulled her onstage in front of thousands of people.

“What are you doing?” she hissed, her face flaming crimson.

“Claire.” Her hands, which had been tugging his so she could get away, stilled at his tone. He was still wired to a mic, and her name reverberated over the grounds. She stared into the deep azure, made bluer by the artificial lights.

And then he went down on one knee.

The crowd went wild, but to Claire it sounded as though the roar came from underwater. Her eyes were on his and couldn’t look away. Not even as turned the palm of her hand so he could place the cabochon ruby ring into it.

“Claire… Sassenach… I want to be someone to stay. Will ye let me? Will ye marry me?”


The roiling of her stomach and whirling in her head had her racing for the bathroom in the small hours of the morning. The sounds of her retching and the splash in the toilet bowl had Jamie padding barefoot over to Claire as he held her hair back.

“Sassenach, I’m sorry you’re unwell.” He smoothed a hand across her forehead, which felt clammy and cold.

“Stupid bloody sushi. Let’s never—” Claire’s moans were cut off in a fresh wave of nausea.

“I’m throwing the takeout menu out. Dinna fash.” Jamie helped her up. She rinsed out her mouth and pressed a damp towel to her face.

“I have class today. I can’t make it, though.” Claire stumbled back to the bed, kicking the comforter away in her flushed state. “I’ll text Louise.” She groaned into the pillow, but felt mildly better after expelling the contents of her stomach.

“It isnae catching, love?” Jamie sat beside her and patted her back gently; she curled up on her side and took deep breaths.

“I don’t think so. You go on ahead. I’ll call you later.” The soothing motions of Jamie’s hand on her back had lulled her halfway to sleep again.

“I’ll call you,” he said, leaning in to kiss her forehead. “Rest easy, Sassenach. I love ye.”

“I love you more,” Claire mumbled into the bed.

It was only hours later when she woke up that she realized: she was sick in the mornings. She was sleepy all the time. She did some backwards counting and discovered she was also late.

After almost two years of trying, she needed a pregnancy test.


“Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony…”

Claire smiled at Jamie, who beamed back as they held hands. They could hear a murmur of approval behind them as their nearest and dearest were gathered behind them in the church pews to witness their union.

“To help, and comfort, that the one ought to have of the other, both in prosperity and adversity…”

All the band members were there with their families. Rupert and Geillis were there as a couple too, and all of Jenny and Ian’s bairns. The church was redolent with flowers, and flickering candlelight everywhere.

“With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow.”

Ian Murray stood as best man, and held a black velvet box with their rings in it. For Jamie, a simple white-gold band he could easily play guitar with. For Claire, a silver ring with an intricate Highland pattern of Scottish thistles.

They left the church amidst a shower of rice and a chorus of well-wishers, to a beautiful reception at Lallybroch and a Mediterranean honeymoon.


Claire waited anxiously in their bedroom as she heard the key turn in the lock. She heard Jamie close the door behind him and open the fridge. A clinking of bottles as he found the champagne.


Claire stifled a giggle, but did not answer. She heard his footsteps head in her direction and then stop abruptly.

First, the Gibson guitar with a handwritten note on it that read “1979”.  She had set it on the floor between the kitchen and the living room.

She fought the urge to peek. Jamie walked on, his tread easily recognizable. Then it stopped again, right outside their bedroom. Lying there was the stethoscope he had given her after she had passed her medical school finals. Alongside it was another note that read “1981”.

“Oh, God.” Jamie’s voice was muffled behind the door, and Claire couldn’t resist.


The door opened and finally, he saw her. Standing in the middle of the room, holding the last of the notes. This one had a purple question mark drawn on it, and “2018” printed beneath it.

“’Tis true?” Jamie’s smile was blinding as he knelt in front of Claire, reaching out to her. His arms went around her legs and his face pressed against her still-flat belly. Her own hands brushed back his hair, and she caught the trickle of a tear sliding down his cheek.

“Are you happy, Jamie?” A knot in her throat made the words come out in a whisper. Jamie raised his head to look up at her. His eyes were radiant, and he placed a kiss on her stomach.

“I’m verra happy, Sassenach.” He smoothed her blouse over the invisible bump reverently. “Och, lad—or lass—” he added, with a smile in his voice, “we canna wait to meet ye. I’m yer Da.” Jamie cleared his throat. “Ye ken yer mam already, I’m sure. She’s a lady of grace, a woman of strength, a doctor and an astonishing beauty. She’s yer mam, Claire Fraser.”



Asriel and the Last Child

A fanfic for @caretaker-au Asriel’s birthday. Hope I’m not too late! Happy birthday, Asriel!

I stepped out of the lab, immediately flinching at the hot ground beneath my paws. I glanced back at the child’s feet behind me, relaxing as I remembered that he had shoes on.

I tried to make small talk to try to lighten the mood.

“So, this place is called Hotland! For, uh, obvious reasons. My house isn’t much farther now! You can meet my Mom, my Dad, and Chara…” I trailed off, realizing that I did not have an answer for when Chara would ask me why a human child was following me home.

Oh, don’t worry, Chara, it’s nothing serious! I snuck out of the house when you were sleeping to check if a human fell down, and here one is! Maybe he can live with us! Oh, thanks so much for being so tolerant of this human, Chara!

The human in question had not spoken very much at all, and did not reply now. He was dressed rather strangely, in a vest, weird pants, and a weird hat on, but I wasn’t going to confront him about them. Maybe it’s a strange human fashion…?

He behaved strangely, too. He didn’t look me in the eye when I talked to him. He kept glancing around suspiciously. He shunned any monsters we came across. 

And several times, I saw him take a shiny object out of his vest, click it a few times, then angrily stuff it back into his vest. 

He wasn’t much shorter than me, and when I found him at the spot where all the humans fall from, he didn’t seem to be injured. I didn’t want to take any chances, so I offered to take him to the city hospital to check if had any injuries from the fall. He nodded, and I led him through the Underground. 

It took me a moment to realize the child had stopped walking. 

I looked back at him to see he was looking down at something. My eyes followed his gaze, and I winced.

A frypan was lying on the ground.

The frypan.

I reached out to him, walking closer, before he knelt downand picked it up. I listened, uneasy, as he spoke to me very quietly. 

“Where did this come from?”

I stopped moving.

“…That pan? It…” My throat closed up and I swallowed hard.

The boy turned to me, and for the first time, I saw two intense yellow eyes. I felt his gaze burn through me, and I didn’t move an inch, for fear that he was secretly using a blue attack on me. 

He took a step toward me and spoke again.

“This pan belonged to one of my best friends. One of my only friends. He went missing two weeks ago. Do not lie to me. What HAPPENED TO HIM?

I stumbled back, panicking. I tried to grasp for something to say, anything to say. The truth bubbled up before I could stop it.

“He..he…he died here! At the capital, I mean! He got burned by a monster and Chara and I got him to a hospital and we thought he might make it but-but the next day Chara told me he was dead and-”

I paused before realizing he was choking on sobs. He looked up at me with a completely different expression, one of loneliness, fear…and sheer anger and hatred.

“He’s…he’s DEAD!?! What did he ever do to you monsters? He wouldn’t harm a monster freak like you if he had a gun to his head!”

His soul blinked in front of him, and the yellow glow became the only color in the colorless FIGHT.

He gripped the pan tightly and swung at me as hard as he could. It connected with my arm raised as an attempted block.


I cried out in pain as the metal, scorched from two weeks on the ground on the ground in Hotland, lowered my HP to past half. I looked at it, and fortunately the pain masked the nausea that went through me. 

The mark the pan left was a patch of itchy, bubbly pink skin, contrast to the soft, white fur on the rest of my arm.

The child pulled back, realizing what he just did. He looked down.

“I shouldn’t call you that, he never liked that word…” His eyes flashed. “But that doesn’t mean that you monsters don’t deserve this! You killed him! And he probably never even laid a finger on you!”

He raised the pan for another strike. “This is for Briar! This is for JUSTICE!”

The boy was about to kill me when a laugh sounded from behind him.

“Ahahaha…no, it wasn’t the monsters who killed that human.”

A red soul blinked beside the yellow one.

Chara whispered in his ear, and then promptly stabbed him.

The boy twitched a moment, making a barely audible noise, and collapsed on the ground.

As the colors of Hotland faded in, Chara walked over and helped me up. Their eyes met my arm. 

“We need to get you back home.” I nodded, trying to hold back tears of pain. They asked me, “Can you stand?” 

I nodded weakly. They walked back to the boy and I almost collapsed from the pain. Instead, I held my breath and distracted myself by watching Chara busy themself with the boy’s body. They pulled the knife they had brought, and wiped it off on the boy’s clothes. They then examined the shiny object the child had in his vest, and stuffed it into their pocket. Finally I watched them cup the boy’s yellow soul in their hands. They flew over to me, and started to walk me home.

A question was nagging on my mind. “Chara, what did you whisper to that human?”

They gave me a half smile. 

“Oh, nothing you need to worry about.”

Neither of us talked for the rest of the trip.

His Human Mate - Part 2

You and Loki spend the entire night talking quietly on the couch. You talk about what life on Asgard was like, what being Tony’s sister is like, what his favorite magic spells are. It’s almost like a first date, but Tony is constantly glaring from the corner.

Loki leans closer, his lips brushing against your ear causing a shudder to run through you, “I believe, that Antony is displeased with your choice of company tonight, dove”

You let out a breathy chuckle, “He doesn’t control who I let court me”

Loki lets out an amused chuckle, “I wonder who the true Alpha of your little pack is”

Clint snorts and bursts into laughter, “Y/N’s obviously the one who runs the tower. Tony can’t deny her anything”

“It’s not nice to eavesdrop, Clint. I’m trying to have a conversation” You toss a pillow at him, but it’s easily caught and sent sailing back. Yelping when it hits you in the face you glare at the archer. “Meanie”

Loki chuckles, “Will you go out to dinner with me two days from now? Is that an acceptable first date?”

“I’d really like that, just let me know where you want to go tomorrow so I’ll know what to wear. I mean,” You look up at him through your lashes, making your voice breathy, “I’ve never been courted by a prince before”

His eyes dilate and he inhales, taking in your alluring scent, and the provocative brushes of your consciousness against his. “It is not something you will regret, dove”

“I hope not” You glance up when you hear a soft whine, Tony’s watching you, His shoulders are slumped and he looks tired, but be also looks like he will refuse to leave unless you do. Turning back to Loki, you whisper, “I have to go now, but I’ll see you tomorrow”

Loki brings you hand up to his mouth, giving you the barest brush of his fangs against the thin skin on the back of your hand, then pressing a kiss there before letting you go. “Good night, dove. I will see you on the morrow”

Standing up you hesitate for just a second before darting in and pressing a kiss to Loki’s cheek, “Dream of me, my prince” you breathe, making him shudder when your breath brushes against his ear.

When you pull back you smirk at his slightly dazed look, before turning and making your way to Tony.

“Y/N …” he whines, reaching out for you. The man looks exhausted, he hasn’t slept in 49 hours, and it was past time for some sibling snuggles.

“Come on, big brother, time for bed.” Tony lets out another whine, but he follows you to the elevator.

“When we get back to the penthouse you can shift and we’ll curl up in your room together”

As soon as the elevator doors open Tony starts to shift, easily flowing from his human form into his wolf form. Now in front of you is a brown wolf about the size of a small car. Tony lets out a soft chuff and nudges you further into the penthouse.

“I need to change into PJ’s first, Tones. Go get settled, I’ll be in there in a minute”

After you get dressed you head to Tony’s room. He’s already made a nest out of various blankets and pillows, and before you even get the chance to climb into bed Tony gently grabs you and pull you in.

“You impatient mutt!”

Tony just lets out another growl, shoving his cold nose against your neck. His body is practically covering your, making it so you can’t move. “Move over! You’re gonna smother me!”

Tony just lets out another whine and refuses to move. His mind brushes against yours, and while the wolf can’t use real words he can sent over feelings and images. Right now he’s sending over fear, “Why are you scared Tones? Neither of us are in any danger!”

A flash of you and Loki, and then another feeling, loneliness. “Do you think I’ll abandon you just because Loki’s courting me?” He lets out a soft growl in confirmation, “What did you think would happen? Did you think I would train you for Loki? That I would just forget about you? I’d never do that! You’re my brother! I’d never abandon family”

A feeling of relief flow through you, “You’re so stupid Tony, you really are lucky that I love you”

With a soft huff Tony settles down for the night. You’re glad that you and Tony managed to get your problems settled. Hopefully now he’ll be a little nicer to Loki.

Two days later finds you getting ready for your date when the alarm to assemble goes off. Both Tony and Steve are with you, helping you get ready. Steve was doing your hair, and Tony was looking through your closet, yelling about going shopping soon.

Sir, Captain Rogers, you are needed.

“Talk to me, J. What’s going on?”

HYDRA seems to have deployed a weapon. Sensors are unsure what type of weapon; however, SHIELD has called the Avengers to assemble, Sir.

“Thanks, J. Let the team know we’re on our way, and prepare the suit for me”

Of course, Sir.

Tony walks over and presses a kiss to your forehead, “You gonna be on the comms?”

“Yeah, I’ll head there now, can’t have you out there without some sort of conscience to keep you in line”

Steve chuckles, “I’m glad someone has a leash on him”

“Y/N! Have the sensors managed to find the HYDRA weapon yet?”

You quickly start scanning the cameras, “It looks like the earth quakes are being generated in the warehouse district. I don’t have an exact location, but I’m working on it”

“Well, can you work any faster?! It’s a little difficult to fire these support arrows when the buildings don’t stay still” Clint shouts as he once again has to relocate.

“I’m doing my best, just give me …”

Tower breach

Tony immediately starts swearing, “Shit, J. Can you tell who’s in the tower?”

Hostiles have entered through the roof; they are making their way through the tower. Sensors are reading 45 heat signatures

“Y/N you need to get out of there. Get into the Hulk-Out room”

“I can’t leave yet, Tony. I’m so close to finding the weapon! Just give me a few more minutes!”

“Please, dove! Get to safety!” Loki begged.

“If I don’t find this weapon more people will die! JARVIS I need some more time! Can you start locking doors? And set the Bots free to cause some trouble”

Of course, Y/N. We shall make it difficult to get to you, however I fear that we will not be enough to stop all of the hostiles

“This was nothing but I diversion! Y/N I’m coming back to the tower” Loki growls

“Diversion of not there are still civilians that need help!! Everyone just keep doing what you’re doing!”

Tony lets out an angry shout over the comm, “Knew I should have made you a suit! After this shit, I’m making you one, I don’t really care how much you bitch”

“Fine, after we stop the earthquakes, you can make me a suit. I won’t even stop you from making the suits that can move on their own! Now shut up so I can get to work”

JARVIS informs you every time a hostile gets to a new floor. They are quickly working their way through the tower, and you are franticly trying to find where the weapon is before you try to escape.

“I found it!” You shout, “It’s in the sewers! There’s an opening right underneath the old textile mill!”

“Thanks Y/N, now get to safety! Iron Man and I will make sure that the weapon is destroyed.”

“I’m going, Cap! Don’t get your panties in a twist”

Suddenly there was the click of a gun behind you, “Get up. Show me your hands, and get up slowly”

“Alright settle down, no need to use guns” You put your hands up and quietly stand. Everyone is shouting over the comms, asking what was going on.

“Take out the comm unit, and place it on the table. Can’t have Mr. Stark following us.”

“Alright. Guys I gotta go, have fun finishing up.“ You quickly put the comm down on the table. “So what do you plan to gain from this? I’m not the engineering genius, if you want a weapon built for you, then your kidnapping the wrong sibling”

The guy grins, “HYDRA has plans for you. Come quietly or we will have to use force.”

You smirk, “If you think I’ll go quietly, then you definitely have the wrong sibling”

Before you can even try to fight back, his gun guns go off. Pain tears through your stomach, and you look down in shock.

“You should have listened, Ms. Stark”

You hit the floor, “If I die” you rasp, “you’ll get nothing”

He crouches down in front of where you’ve collapse, “You won’t die, you don’t have to worry about that” Then he raises his fist and slams it down on the side of your face, knocking you out cold.

Tony lets out a shout when he hears the gunshot. “J! What happened?!?”

Unfortunately, the HYDRA agents have disconnected my cameras, I cannot see what is happening. However, my sensors indicate that Y/N has been injured and is currently being carried out of the tower and put in a black van.

“Follow the van, hack into every camera you have to and follow them as far as you can” Tony snaps. He should have gone back to the tower, he should have left the others to take care of the earthquakes, he should have protected his little sister.

“Anthony! Where is she?!?” Loki shouts. He looks frantic, “I heard the gunshot, do you know if she is alright?!”

“JARVIS was compromised, Y/n was hurt, and the HYDRA agents have her”


Steve is the one who steps forward to help, “If any of us go after her right now, they’ll kill her. They’ve already shot her once, if we try to get to her now, they won’t hesitate to kill her”

Loki snarls, “We shouldn’t have left her alone. I should have gone as soon as this breached the tower”

Steve sighs, “She would never have forgiven you if you had let civilians die for her”

“I know, but as we speak she gets further away. We do not know what they want with her, we do not know anything!”

Finally looking up, Tony makes eye contact with Loki, “We’ll find her. We’ll find her and we’ll make them pay”

Loki nods, “Failure is not an option. I will begin a tracking spell as soon as we get back to the tower”

Tony nods and claps his hand on Loki’s shoulder, “HYDRA will regret taking her”

Loki smirks, “I look forward to making them suffer. No one harms a Prince’s mate without consequence”

The rest of the Avengers all nod. They may have only known Y/N for a short time but she has managed to wriggle her way into all their hearts. HYRDA will rue the day they decide to mess with the Avengers family.


Part 3

Rising Above Theory: Lie Ren’s Semblance

Since the last episode, I’ve seen a number of posts theorizing what Lie Ren’s Semblance is, but I haven’t seen one that quite captures what I’ve been thinking. In the episode, we see a very clear moment of little Lie in full-fledged panic. He sees little Nora, and he sees the Grimm, and his fear results in his incapacity to recognize how he can change the outcome of his immediate reality.

He then fades to an odd sepia color, and we’re given the visual cue that indicates his Aura/Semblance being activated. You can see that cue being used really effectively throughout Vol 4, from when Tyrian is attacking Ruby to when Sweet Boy Sun expends his Aura while using his clone Semblance. So, we know that Lie Ren is definitely doing something Semblance-y when he glows pink.

Ren is also capable of bringing others under his protection, letting them…calm down, go undetected, or something along those lines. So, what is the nature of his Semblance, exactly?

It is at this point that I’d like to talk about the shot of the lotus.

This shot is deliberately inserted into the earlier scene of Ren under the bridge, and I think that Miles and Kerry are trying to convey something significant to us through the symbol of the lotus. While the lotus can symbolize many things, a certain saying resonated with me-

“I love the lotus because while growing from mud, it is unstained.“
- Zhao Dunyi, Confucian scholar

In this scene, Ren is something like that lotus- he’s awash in fear and misery, but he rises above; he rises above the smothering darkness, and he acts purely and effectively. He is unstained by evil, he retains his humanity, and he goes to protect Nora.

It seems like his Semblance is a sort of Transcendence, the ability to rise above one’s immediate physical conditions. At first glance, Transcendence appears to be more or less interchangeable with some sort of Emotional Stability Semblance, since both let him reach a point past emotion, or a point of tranquility. But, I think the critical question, the one that hasn’t been looked too closely at, is how he achieves that Stability/Tranquility/Transcendence. I think that it is more complicated than his Semblance just making Stability/Transcendence happen, and that his Semblance is much more than just an emotional centering/reset process.

To begin with, let’s look at what happens to Ren and Nora again-

They fade to sepia. They lose their individual colors and fade into the scene together. Now, this might seem inconsequential, but I believe that the loss of each of their individual colors carries major significance. Why? Because, as we know, color isn’t just color in RWBY- color signifies individuality and self-expression, and those two values are so central to modern Remnant that children are typically named with color in mind.

The fact that Ren and Nora fade to sepia implies more than just some sort of stealth visual cue- it is implying that Ren and Nora are briefly losing their individuality. They’re literally fading into the background; they’re transcending their individuality and becoming one with the world.

There’s even evidence for Ren’s Semblance being Transcendence back from Vol 1. Remember this?

While it might seem like Ren’s ability to sense Grimm might just be a function of his Aura, we’ve seen that his danger sense is far more developed than just a feeling of being watched.

Ren has a very slight capacity for precognition, but, as Ozpin has implied, magic does not exist in the world outside of Maidens (and ostensibly Silver-eyed Warriors and Artifact-wielders). Therefore, if Ren’s ability is beyond what an Aura should be capable of, if Ren is not a Maiden, if Ren does not have Silver Eyes, and if Ren is not wielding an Artifact, then his ability to sense the future is almost certainly a function of his Semblance.

For Ren to be able to close his eyes, focus, and sense that a deranged scorpion thespian is sprinting at RNJR with all the speed of a storm, Ren has to be tapping into something greater than himself. He is using his Semblance to tap into the awareness of the world at large, leaving behind the limitations of his physical body as his senses meld with the world’s. This is what allows him to sense a danger that is still approaching the group.  

Ultimately, Ren’s Semblance is Transcendence: it enables him to rise above and out of his own physical body to re-center his emotions, it enables him to merge with the world and fade away into it so as to conceal himself, it extends his sensory powers by extending his awareness through the world’s, and it enables him to bring others into that state of transcendence of the self.

As always, thanks for reading! I hope that you all enjoyed it, and that you found something worth pondering.

If you want to read any of my other writings, whether you’re curious about-

-Summer Rose’s backstory
-Weiss’s character arc
-or the deal with the whole Xiao Long-Rose-Branwen family

click on the corresponding links! There’s plenty more where this came from.

ML’s Love Letter To Horror Movie Fans

I was rewatching Horrificator and Nino’s insistence on filming through a potential tragedy reminded me of that guy from Diary of the Dead, that guy from Cloverfield, etc..  That had me paying closer attention to how much this episode pays homage to Horror/Monster movie tropes. I was cackling so much, I decided to make a post to spread the hilarity.  

A huge thanks goes to TV Tropes, where you can find the description of each stereotype.  You can also click my headers for a direct link to each.  There is an existing list of tropes from this episode that I found halfway through doing my own list.  I couldn’t find an entry for every trope so the ones that are not linked I came up with myself.  Also, I didn’t include every single trope.

Thanks go to Miraculous, les aventures de Ladybug et Chat Noir (aka, Miraculous Ladybug) for gaining even more of my respect and for giving some mad love to us horror fans.  Enjoy!

We’re Making a Horror Movie Inside the Horror Movie

As seen in Diary of the Dead

Tragic Monster

  • tbh this happens in EVERY ML ep

Cat Scare

  • the monster is in the stall behind Marinette
  • ominous music builds
  • Mari: hmmm…what’s this pink goo….
  • Alya: *out of nowhere* MARINETTE!
  • viewer jumps because OH NO Alya’s warning her about the monst–
  • oh wait, no…
  • Alya:  Chloe’s gonna kiss Adrien
  • Mari:  OH NO THE HORROR!!!!!

Beware of jump scares (or not) after the cut…

Keep reading

How I Make Animated Gifs (Photoshop CS5)

So! I went from no one asking to suddenly having quite a few people asking about how I animated this stuff so I’m putting together a little tutorial now.

(Disclaimer, I am not an actual animator, and my knowledge on this is all trial-and-error but works for me.)

First, you open up Photoshop. Click the icon, blah blah, wait 100000 years for it to load (it takes mine like 5 minutes :’))

Then you’re going to go to “Window” and scroll down to “Animation.”

Something like this should pop up:

It’ll be empty until you open up a file and add a layer. There are a few ways you can go about this - you can either animate via animation timeline or animation frames, but I personally prefer frames. So, once you add a layer, you’ll probably see something like this:

The “click here” is where you want to click if you want to animate by frames. You can toggle between frames and timeline through this. Now, just for the sake of showing what it’ll look like when there’s actually something kinda-animated, I’m going to open up a small animation I did for this.

(Yeah that’s a lot of layers, and each one is individually drawn for the hair hahahaha) Below, on the animation bar, that’s all the individual frames. And if you look closer - 

- you’ll see that I have it set to 0.05 sec per frame. I’ve just found that for actual animation, this is the smoothest (while still manageable) rate to animate sequences, so 0.05-0.08 is generally the range I go with. (I am not an actual animator, I just do what I do.)

For small sort-of animations like this,

each individual motion is anywhere from 0.2 seconds to 0.8 seconds, with varying animation frames in-between to give a staggered effect.

This is what the animation frames look like. Each frame is 0.2 seconds, but I had the motions staggered across the frames. (0.5 and 1 are my usual go-to rates for simple, small-motion animations though.)

Also note that, on the bottom left, I have the loop set to “Forever.” There are the options “once,” “three times,” “forever,” and “other,” but for continuously looping gifs you’ll want “forever.” 

So! What do you do with your completed animation? You go to “File,” and scroll down to “Save for Web & Devices.”

I’ve gone back to the Kushina hair animation thing for this. Now, after you click on “Save for Web & Devices,” something like this should pop-up with an overview.

Review what it is that you want - I generally go with the presets, and pay attention to the bottom right-hand side. Image size, I generally keep within 800^2 px to 1500^2px to keep the files small. (That’s not very small, but considering I draw on 3000px by 2500px+, it is to me)

Also, looping options! If you forget to switch the looping options on the animation frame/timeline, you can do it here too. Once everything is checked over, just click “Save,” and you have your looping gif!

(Yeah no I only put this together quickly, I wasn’t gonna bother making it smoother than I made it. Too much work and not enough time.)

So there! Making looping gifs on photoshop. If you want an actual animation tutorial - how to make smooth walking motions, hair, etc. - you can probably find one on Youtube or something. Saving gifs from professional animation and analyzing the frame-by-frame motions helps too (as I mentioned above, my learning was crude). The actual process of animating is pretty damn time-consuming, but if you do small animations to add some flair to your art, it’s manageable.

Happy gif-making!

One Dance Club // Cheryl

Prompt #1: “Why are we at a strip club?”
Prompt #20: “Let’s have some fun. A little truth or dare never hurt anyone.”

Author: Caitsy

Warning: Possible swearing, strip club, drugs (mentioned), underage drinking, and biker gang

Disclaimer: I do not own Riverdale or the characters. The name of the club is actually the title of a song which I also do not own at all.

Summary: The group got together for a small get together before finals arrived at their doorsteps. Things have changed with Cheryl hanging out with the group more since the support she needed came from them. During the game the Reader’s secrets come out with shock of a family business and a relationship.

Requested: Yes.

A/N: Sorry for the length of time it took to get this out! I’m going through a couple personal problems but I’m getting this out. Plus I’ve been planning my tattoo I’m getting for my birthday this month!

Master List

Prompt List


Originally posted by sprousecoles

Cheryl was a different person to everyone with a strange personality that but if anything she was eve more bitchy after her brother’s death. You weren’t sure how you had become friends with the redheaded girl but it developed even further when she started to depend on you for support. The summer before junior year was a very odd year but with Cheryl putting her brother’s death behind her she needed something different.

During sophomore year so many things changed drastically from Betty no longer staring at Archie was unrequited love. She spent a lot of her time with Jughead for the paper and when he rejoined hanging out with Archie. Near the end of the year Cheryl began to hang out with the group to be more with you.

Everyone was in your house for a small get together to get ready for the upcoming summer following the coming finals week. It was the typical get together that included games and alcohol because what party doesn’t have that? The couples all sat together  with Betty and Jughead inconspicuously holding hands as if nobody knew they had been dating since early sophomore year. Archie was sitting by himself because whatever he had had with Valerie had ended almost as soon as it had started. Kevin and Veronica were sitting next to each other while Cheryl was glued to you.

“Let’s have some fun a little truth or dare never hurt anyone before.” You smirked as everyone straightened up.

Keep reading

Wanderer - Jared Leto x Reader Imagine

AUTHOR’S NOTE; Thank you for the request lovely! @imokay-imokay I am unaware if you wanted fluff or what so I just kind of winged it. I really hope it’s to your liking and I hope it’s ok! Please feel free to give me some feedback, message me ^_^ I didn’t mean to make it this long either it was actually supposed to be pretty short but I suck and it came out long haha. 

The distant sound of water hit your ears with the most delectable of sensations and you could feel yourself growing more and more excited at the fact that you were out in the middle of nature. You had been dying to go on this hike for over a month with Jared, but with his schedule being more hectic than a soup kitchen on Thanksgiving, you didn’t really have a chance to do it. You had originally planned to go alone during a good summer morning, but Jared insisted that you two go together since he knew the trail’s best spots. 

You may have been immensely softened by the idea of him wanting to go hiking with you, but you were keenly aware of how fragile he thought you were. His original purpose of going on this hike with you was to ensure that you didn’t get lost or hurt on your own. Jared Leto was an artist, a musician, an actor and an entrepreneur but he was also a very bad liar. 

Throughout most of your time on the trail you found him stealing long glimpses at you that you wanted to chalk up to possible admiration, but you knew better. He was keeping an eye on you to make sure you didn’t fall, trip, stumble, step on a rattle snake, or possibly end the world by taking a short breath. He was so over dramatic.

The sound of his camera lens caught you off guard and when you turned to face him he was glancing down at its screen as if you weren’t even there. You liked this side of him and more importantly you missed this side of him. He was usually so caught up in his career or his band that he never really got out like he used to. You couldn’t remember the last time he said he was going hiking or climbing, but you were glad he had finally said something. 

Your attentions were pulled away from him as you glanced around the grassy plain, and you were surprised when your eyes caught the mystic forest more than 15 feet to your right. Jared’s true interests lied in landscapes and high peak, but you personally enjoyed more of the forest atmosphere because it made you feel more at peace. This is usually where you two were put at a crossroads due to your distaste for heights and his passion for getting his way. 

Your slow wander for the forest was halted by the feeling of his hand on your forearm, and your eyes fixated on him with unease. 

“What are you doing?” He questioned and you raised a brow. 

“Headed for the trail.” You answered using your thumb to point in the direction of the forest that was now behind you. He glanced over your shoulder for a moment before returning his eyes to you.

“There is no trail in there, it’s just a forest.” He stated and you shrugged.

“So…?” You questioned in response before tugging at your forearm that he kept locked within his grasp. 

“So? You’re just gonna….run around in the woods by yourself?” He questioned while allowing the outrage and disapproval to shine clearly in his voice. 

“I’ve gone hiking by myself before, J. I’m not some barbie doll princess who needs her hand held to walk through the woods.” You chuckled slightly even though you were slightly annoyed by his response. 

“You’ll get hurt by yourself. Here, let me finish up some photos and I will go with you.” He answered tilting his camera to the side and releasing your arm. 

“Are you kidding?” You questioned only to have his eyes return to yours in a look of confusion. You couldn’t stop your annoyance from bubbling over as he stared at you through eyes of ignorance. Did he really believe you were that fragile that you couldn’t do for yourself? How many trails had you gone on without him because he was on tour or too busy engulfed in his work to spend time with you? How many times had you gotten lost only to have Shannon or your own friends fish you out and show you the way while he was gone? 

“I can manage on my own. What do you think I do when you’re not around, cower in a corner some where? You disappear for months on end touring with your band and acting, are you worried about me then too or is this something you just developed?” You asked sarcastically while snatching your arm away from him. 

“You have no idea what’s in there, and i’m just trying to help you. I said you’re not going in there by yourself and I mean that. We’ll both go.” He stated. You raised a brow and scoffed. Was he not listening?

“No, I’m going by myself if that’s ok with you dad.” You answered setting your chin and rolling your eyes. 

“You didn’t even come out here for me, you came out here for you. This wasn’t about spending time with me, it was about you watching over me like some authority figure. Well no thanks, I’ll call Shannon if I need help because he seems to be the only one that shows up when I call.” You raged. 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He questioned, and the hiss behind his voice was clear. You shrugged unapologetically as you walked backwards towards the forest only to fully turn around and leave him there. You were surprised when he didn’t come after you, but more than anything you were glad he didn’t. The sound of your name echoed through the distance but you didn’t answer. 

You needed a chance to cool off and you knew that if he’d followed you, you’d have said something you knew would hurt him. You couldn’t lie, the Shannon comment was a low blow but what hurt the most is that it was true. Some how Shannon always came to get you when you got hurt or lost while Jared was always some how “unavailable” or trying to “stay out of the public eye” which did nothing but piss you off further. 

Truth be told, you felt like some well kept secret when it came to him because he was always so hell bent on keeping his personal life under wraps from everyone, including you. It was like he wasn’t there even when he was, and moments like this where you were supposed to be together were always spent apart. He didn’t bring you here to spend time with you like he said, he brought you here because he knew you were coming and didn’t want you to get lost or hurt. They were not the same thing. 

Your legs stomped below you lifelessly as you made your way through the thickness of the forest and you chuckled at the fact that you had spent more than 15 minutes in it already and hadn’t realized it. You had stomped off so quickly that you didn’t manage to remember your path, but at the moment that didn’t concern you.

“What a fucking asshole. Bring me on a hike because you plucked up the common sense to want to spend time with me NOT because you want to watch me. Like what the actual fuck? Is it too much to want your boyfriend to pay attention to you, or was I fucking cracked?” Your grumbled angrily as you continued to stomp through the dryness of the forest floor. You tried to wrap your mind around it but you simply couldn’t. 

Your time was mostly spent gazing at the plants that you crossed paths with and admiring the trees. Trees were always your favorite because people tended to underestimate them. Trees started out as small plants, but eventually they grew in stature to become one of our main resources for shade, air, and other much needed organics. If memory serves right, they were actually the first bringers of life, before women of course. Trees were able to create fruit, fruit is a living substance, so technically trees were mothers long before humans were. This fact made them extremely fascinating to you. Add that, to the common conception that the souls of trees have lived longer than 400 hundred years, and you’ve created a fascination for them for yourself. 

It wasn’t until the darkness came that you realized how late it had actually gotten, and you immediately turned towards your cell phone. No signal. That wasn’t much of a surprised, but if you could find a bar or two you could at least text someone to let them know you were fine. Your stubborn ideals knew no bounds and you found yourself refusing to text anyone but Jared. 

Your fingers wrapped elegantly around the base of your phone as you held it up towards the sky in an attempt to gain some form of a signal. You absently wandered hoping to see a line or two but found yourself trapped by a tree root that snagged your foot. You hurled towards the ground faster than you could catch yourself, and the ruthless scrape to your knee caused you to groan. The pain wasn’t too bad, but it still stung more than you’d have liked. The small smell of copper in the air informed you that you were bleeding, but you refused to look at it. Blood wasn’t exactly your favorite thing in the world to see.

Pushing your hand down in the direction of the pain, you felt the liquid hit your fingers with a warm after tone. It was a scrape and it didn’t feel serious. Standing to your feet, you dusted yourself off and proceeded to look through your pockets for some form of a cloth to cover the injury. It didn’t take long for you to find a cloth in your bag and without any hesitation you wrapped it around your knee to stop whatever bleeding you had. 

Returning to your phone, you smiled when you saw that there was a signal. You searched for Shannon’s name and began typing. Your eyes stayed glued to the screen for some form of a response only to find that the message was not going through. Sighing deeply, you found his name once more and clicked call. It rang twice before he answered. 

“Shan?” you questioned.

“Yeah, what’s up, where are you?” He questioned. 

“I’m in the woods, on a trail. Just hiking.” you answered.

“You lost?” he chuckled and you frowned. 

“No….it’s just dark and I got separated from J, but i’m ok. Just needed a favor?” You chimed in.

“You need me to come get you?” He questioned and you nodded.

“Yeeeeep.” you answered adding a small squeak to your voice. 

“I’m on my way. Send me the GPS and meet me on the outskirts.” He demanded before hanging up the phone. It was strange, it didn’t sound like himself but you dismissed it. 

Your small walk back to the clearing took you longer than you expected, but it was refreshing nonetheless. The small puttering of an engine caught your ear and you smiled. A small glance down at your watch caused you to smile as you realized it wasn’t too late at night, but still early enough to get food.

You found yourself in slight shock when Jared emerged from the car and Shannon was no where to be found. 

“What are you doing here?” You questioned while folding your arms across your chest. He didn’t answer, but continued to walk toward you. 

“Where is Shannon?” You asked.

“He’s not here, and he’s not coming.” He stated simply stopping a few feet away from you. 

“I don’t wanna fight right now, I know… you’re always right. That what you wanna hear?” You question only to have his eyebrow cock in response. His features fixed into an expression that you’ve never seen before and it radiated with the sense of rage and concern. You attempted to walk passed him only to have his fingers graze the inside of your elbow.

“Oh blow me.” He answered angrily before turning away from you. 

Your eyes were confused as they graced his face, but he was unaffected by your stare. His cologne still lingered but it couldn’t hide the small of alcohol on his breath. Poor man, he was so worried that you had drove him to drink. 

“And your drunk. That’s ….that’s exactly what I need.” you answered but he scoffed. 

“I’ll walk home.” You continued while pulling away from him only to have him tighten his grasp on your arm. You groaned in protest but he still didn’t let you go. 

“You’er done making decisions for today. Get in the car.” He grumbled, and although he spoke casually it felt as if he was screaming at you on the inside. You opened your mouth to say no only to have him actually scream at you.

“Get in the fucking car!” You shivered in response and felt yourself recoil from him. 

“What is your problem?” You asked scolding him. 

“My….My problem? You disappear for hours in the middle of mother fucking no where and i’m the one with the problem? Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been or did you just not care?” He questioned. Before you could respond, he continued.

“Of course you didn’t care because that would mean you actually consider someone else’s feelings when you make decisions. There are rattlesnakes out there, you’re allergic bees; what if you were stung? Do you have a pen on you in those pretty little blue jean shorts? Do you?” He questioned while releasing your arm and pulling at your blue jean pockets.

“Stop it!” You protested slapping his hands away. 

“You don’t, do you because that would require responsibility something you seem to keep struggling with!” He yelled and you pushed him. 

“Oh fuck you. How dare you lecture me about responsibility mister i’m only around 1 month at a time. You’re so goddamn scared of responsibility that you can’t even tell tabloids you’re dating someone, and don’t even get me started on your back. You think you’re fooling anyone? Pulling out a cane and a knee brace doesn’t fix the problem. I saw your x-rays and your doctor’s notes. You’re not even supposed to be out here hiking, or twirling around on stage like you’re doing yet some how you are. Dunking yourself in ice baths isn’t going to keep working, and god forbid you check in with me to tell me if you’re ok. I barely even hear from you when you’re out there, so fuck that. Those in glass huts Mr. Leto.” You countered only to have him grab your chin. 

“That is not the same.” he hissed and you rose a brow. 

“Of course not, because when it’s you, it’s always different right?” You question and he narrowed his eyes.

“No, it’s different because I have Shannon, Tomo and an entire time around me to help me with anything that I need. While you wander into the woods equipped with nothing but a stupid phone that has no signal and can die at any moment. The difference is what you did was stupid and reckless and you don’t even care how it affects other people. You don’t care how it affects me. Then you call Shannon, SHANNON? Shannon is not your boyfriend, Shannon is not the one who was pacing around furious and worried about you. you are mine and you should have called me.” He grumbled releasing your chin and you couldn’t help your slight feeling of guilt. 

“I am a capable person, and for some reason everyone knows it but you. I was an independent, strong, and capable person before I met you, and I still am. So, do you have any idea how it makes me feel when you compare me to a brainless child? Well it pisses me off, obviously, but you still do it. So who isn’t considering who’s feelings here?” you question only for him to laugh. 

“I never said you were brainless, but to say you aren’t stubborn and childish would be a lie. My back, is fine. I do my checkups and I take care of myself because i have responsibilities and obligations. I wont stop what I enjoy because of a little pain that I know I can maintain. You, intentionally called Shannon knowing that it would just piss me off more, and you know I was worried beyond reason wondering if you were ok. I had all these thoughts about you being bitten by something, or falling some where and legit hurting yourself only for you to call Shannon and completely ignore me knowing that I was waiting to hear from you.” He stated and you frowned. 

“Oh, what’s a matter? You were so proud of yourself before.” He taunted. You folded your arms across your chest and rolled your eyes. You were aware that he had a point, but you would not admit it. 

“Yeah well, you’re still an ass hole.” You answer shrugging. 

“Don’t ever, do that to me again.” He demanded, and although he seemed more calm than before, his tone was serious. 

You mumbled an ‘ok’ only to have him chuckle. 

“Oh i’m going to punish you. Don’t worry.” he urged while wrapping his arm around your waist forcefully and pulling you to the car. You felt yourself protesting against his grip only to have him pull you more. You were still upset and you weren’t going to back down, but you knew more than anyone that he was not going to stop until he had you home. You sighed in defeat and surrendered to being put in the car and taken home. 


Summary: Lee finds your Tumblr.

Pairings: Lee Pace x Reader

Word Count: 684

Requested by Anon: Can u write something like how lee pace would feel about tumblr and reading some of the fan fic?

Master Lists: Drabbles/Imagines, and Completed Series

Originally posted by leepace71

A/n: Just a very short in real life Drabble 

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first time

I was lightly head banging along to the song that echoed throughout the studio space. My makeup artist, Nina, let out a sigh of frustration, “Will you keep still” she said before breaking out into a smile. “Sorry,” I smirked, strumming my fingers against my leg instead. “I thought you were bringing your intern along today?” I asked, glancing up at her reflection. She nodded, “I am, but she’s not coming in until a bit later.”

A few minutes went by before I spoke again, “I saw that picture you posted on instagram last night of that face mask you made. Why can’t I ever wear anything like that?” Nina chuckled slightly as she padded powder over my face, “Because you’re supposed to look good, not like some monster.” “I’m going to request a shoot like that, maybe for the next album. It looked really cool,” I said as she replied with a quiet thank you.

I had been at the studio for about an hour, and finally the photo shoot had begun. I was stood against a black backdrop, with two huge lights shining on me. The typical set up of a photographer with a big camera, with a laptop set up on the side. People scurrying around in the background either getting coffee, getting the next look ready or just trying to look busy. “Ok Shawn, let’s lighten the mood a little. What’s your favourite song right now?” the photographer asked, holding the camera loosely in his hand. “It’d have to be Castle On the Hill by Ed Sheeran,” I replied. The photographer glared at the guy who was near the music system, seconds later the song was bouncing off the walls. I had been up for a while, but was yet to actually feel awake. It didn’t matter how many coffees I had, music always seemed to help more.

The shoot’s pace quickened as the camera flashed every other second, as I changed my pose in simple ways. “Brilliant Shawn, these are coming out great” the photographer called out. I nodded and smiled as I stood still and pushed my hand through my hair. As the flash went off, I looked passed the set up and over at the stairs near the entrance. A girl dressed in a denim skirt and striped white top, covered with a tanned seude jacket hurried down the stairs. No one else seemed to pay attention to the fact that you could hear her singing along to the song, swaying her hips slightly as she took each step.

I slowly removed my hand from my hair as my eyes continued to follow her movement. “Perfect Shawn,” I heard the photographer say before the flash took over my view. I blinked a few times, “Ok, let’s start the next look.” I felt my cheeks heat up slightly as I went back to the chair in front of the mirror. “You alright?” Andrew asked. I nodded, “Yeah, those lights are just a little hot.”  

I stared at the mirror and watched as the girl stopped once she met Nina, they spoke briefly before they started approaching me. I quickly sat up and combed through my hair, making sure I looked somewhat decent. “Shawn, this is (Y/N), she’s my intern” Nina smiled, placing her hand on the girls shoulder. “Nice to meet you,” (Y/N) said boldly sticking her hand out. I took it and shook it slowly, “Hey” I fidgeted in my chair as she let go of my hand and grabbed a stool nearby, dragging it so she could sit beside the mirror. “(Y/N’s) just gonna be watching me today, as this is her first time on a set like this. Is that ok?” I looked at (Y/N) who sat pretty much in front of me, her eyes glued to me as if I was part of a science experiment a teacher was demonstrating. “Sure,” I muttered.

My eyes flickered between my hands in my lap and (Y/N). She removed her coat and placed it on her lap as she leaned down into her bag, pulling out a pad and paper. “Oh by the way, I saw that mask you were working on. The one you posted on instagram last night,” she said as she searched through her pad for a blank page. “Oh yeah, what do you think?” Nina replied as she made me lean my head back slightly. “It looked awesome, I’ve done one similar - not as advanced and perfect obviously,” (Y/N) chuckled slightly.

“Shawn was saying earlier that he wanted to do a shoot where he could wear something like that,” Nina said. (Y/N’s) eyes lit up as she smiled at me, “I could totally see you as some sort of Vampire. But a proper one you know, not like something from The Vampire Diaries.” “I like the Vampire Diaries,” I said quickly, not thinking before I spoke. “Oh so do I,” (Y/N) said as she tapped the end of her pen against the paper. “The guys look really hot as vampires, but I can see you with a more gore-like look.”  She awkwardly pretended to brush hair behind her ear when I didn’t reply.

I was back on set again, almost finished with the final look. Check Yes Juliet by We the Kings was playing and I couldn’t help but get distracted by (Y/N). She was cleaning up Nina’s area by the mirror as she danced along to the song. The photographer didn’t mind, wanting shots of me looking away from the camera. She grabbed two brushes and used the ends of them to bang against the edge of the desk, along with the beat. She then did a twirl as she moved round the back of the chair and placed them in the bag. She raised her hands in the air and tipped her head back as it reached the end of the bridge, before starting up again as if oxygen had suddenly been put back in her.

She moved frantically as if she was in her kitchen by herself. No one else seemed to notice but I couldn’t help my eyes feeling drawn towards her. I lowered my head to let out a chuckle and “flash”. We took a few more photos and then it was over. I wandered over to the laptop and looked at the photos with the photographer as he mentioned the ones he really liked. “This one, I really love” he said. It was one of me laughing to myself, looking at the ground. “I don’t know what you were thinking of in that moment, but it worked,” the photographer said. I looked at the photo for a few more seconds, before glancing over at (Y/N) who was writing things down in her notebook.

I was back in the makeup chair with Nina removing all the makeup she had caked onto my face. I looked through my phone, finding her photo again on instagram. I clicked on the likes and found (Y/N’s) name. I scrolled through her feed before following her. Within seconds she hurried over with two coffees in her hand. She placed them in front of me before sitting back on her stool. She spoke to Nina about something as I continued to look through her instragram. I found a photo of her from halloween where she was dressed as a vampire. The caption read: ‘be afraid because I probably will bite #makeupbyme’ . I commented on the photo saying, 'so, can you make me look this good as a vampire?’

I watched secretly as she pulled out her phone and read the notification. I felt a fuzzy feeling in my stomach as I watched the smile appear on her face. I was surprised by my screen lighting up seconds later. I read the reply, ’@shawnmendes that depends… do you bite?’ My head shot up from my screen to find her looking at me. We both broke out in smiles as Nina rambled on about something. Suddenly (Y/N) stood up and left as Nina asked her to do something. Nina grabbed a coffee and was about to take a sip, “Oh, this one must be yours.” She handed it to me before taking the other one, “Why’d you say that?” She took the top half of the cup and turned it in my hand to reveal a mobile number on the other side. “I already have (Y/N’s) number,” she said raising an eyebrow before having some coffee.


Request:  Wow those Soulmate ones are great! I love that idea and independent movies based off it are great… Could I request one with Jun? Take your time love 💖

  • So meeting your soulmate was a thing people looked forward to of course but you weren’t in a rush to find them
  • you were just gonna let it happen when it does
  • the magical words on your wrist were “Hey that’s exactly what my wrist says!” so you knew you had no idea how you’d meet your soulmate
  • of course every time you met someone new you hoped to hear that but sadly you didn’t have that much luck
  • but one day you were grocery shopping in a small store
  • you knew about everyone in your town or well at least the faces
  • but now there were a few ones you’d never seen
  • if by a few you can say 13
  • there was this one guy who stayed with the cart and ordered the others around to get stuff, he was pretty buff that’s nice
  • and you saw him smiling at this teen you saw about every time they went to the store. *cough*  Soulmate!S.Coups *cough*
  • but moving on you were going on with your own business just getting what you needed
  • you passed this tall guy getting flour from the highest shelf you could never reach so you asked him to get you one too
  • which he did and you were all like “I’ve never seen you guys here before where did you come from?”
  • apparently they were all visiting one of the boys’ hometown and yeah the rest is history
  • you had a nice little chat with the guy that was apparently called Mingyu
  • they seemed all like polite guys as you passed some of them on your way to the items you needed
  • after some time you saw one of those guys taking selfies in the cereal aisle
  • and you had to admit he had the right because he looked hella fine
  • you were pretty far away from him but you knew you were in his selfie
  • so of course you wanted to photobomb him
  • you decided to go classic and throw up a peace sign and try to look cute from behind your shopping cart
  • after a few selfies he turned around and started grinning
  • you rolled your cart a little closer and said “Shouldn’t you be searching like eggs or something for your friends?”
  • and he was like “Hey that’s exactly what my wrist says!”
  • “No way you have that written on your wrist omg I’m so sorry” because thinking about it the poor dude needs to live with that horrible sentence on his wrist forever
  • he shyly showed you his wrist with a little chuckle “Yes way, my name is Junhui but you can call me Jun for short how about you?”
  • you shortly introduced yourself and suddenly you couldn’t move
  • you had been wrapped by Jun’s arms
  • he was like swaying you a bit from side to side like a little kid who was hugging his teddy bear
  • “I’m sorry I’m just so excited I’ve finally found my soulmate!” he genuinely seemed overwhelmed with emotions
  • seeing him so happy made you even more glad to have found your soulmate
  • “Wait send me that selfie where I’m also in! I need to have our first picture together i mean we basically met through those”
  • and so that specific selfie of Jun became your wallpaper also
  • you clicked so easily with each other it was ridiculous
  • every time you could you would remake your first pic together in as many ways as possible
  • (switch ver.) (summer ver.) (outside ver.)
  • just all the fun and being silly


Feigning The Connection

“Prompt: You seem so invincible. But just touch you and you’ll wince. You have secrets and trust no one. You’re the perfect example of betrayal. Because anyone you’ve ever trusted broke you. Thrust into a new world, will you be able to stay alone, or will Bellamy work his way in



A/N: Thank you to all those that have patiently waited for me to get this up. These past couple of days have been absolutely crazy, starting from my parents to just being generally busy, to literally having no idea how to write this chapter. I really wanted to make this chapter great and I still don’t feel justified with the final product but have no idea what to add. Only I’ll get over this specific writing block but i just need to keep writing, there’s nothing else to do. Anyways, again thank you, and hope that this chapter was still good!

I hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Send me a little comment in the ask section or leave it below on what you thought of this chapter. It doesn’t have to be long, I appreciate every single comment I receive and telling me just helps inspire me to write it more frequently.

AGAIN, remember if you’d like me to continue this series, just leave a little comment or an ask letting me know. I will NOT continue the series if no one wants me to.

Pairing: Bellamy x Reader

Based off of: The 100 02x15 and 02x16

Warnings: mass murder 

Originally posted by dailybellamyblake

Something you hadn’t felt in forever, was comfort. You were comfortable. There was something cushioned underneath you, and you felt safe though you weren’t sure why. Opening your eyes slowly, you blinked from the bright light above your head. Though the bright light immediately reminded you of where you were, the last time you’d seen that bright light was when the Mountain men had been taking your bone marrow. When you’d been strapped down to a metal table and a hole drilled into your leg.

Your heart immediately sped up, panic setting within you as you sat up, panting as you tried to get away. But there was one difference, no one was holding you down. Nothing was holding you down. Though in your state of terror, you did not realize the free mobility you had and shifted in your seat. You instantly regretted the fast movement, your hand falling to your side as pain shot through your body.

You sighed heavily, looking around you for the first time to notice you weren’t in the same white lab as before. You were in a completely different room, nicer looking room with decorated walls and furnisher littered the room. You continued to watch warily, despite the vacancy, it didn’t rightly settle within you that you had no idea where you were. You tried to remember how you could’ve gotten here, if Cage or one of the doctors had taken you here before it suddenly clicked. Bellamy. 

I got you.

That’s right, Bellamy… Bellamy found you. He had saved you. Which meant you needed to find him. Needed to discuss with him what was happening as he was the only one who knew. Had he managed to save your friends yet? Were they alive or dead? And why had he been in a guard uniform? Pushing forward on the couch you’d been placed on, you noticed the change of clothes. No longer were you dressed with nothing but a medical gown and rather had actual clothing on. Real, clean clothing.

Jeans that felt soft on the skin, black and easily movable within. A blue shirt that was scarce of any markings or rips. You looked down at the clean clothes in fascination. You haven’t had a clean pair of clothes since on the Ark, and though you had no idea where you’d gotten them from, you were relieved. You felt safer knowing you held actual clothing on your body and less exposed.

Hesitantly, you pushed your feet onto the ground, standing up from the bed. You wobbled on your feet, and you made the note that you hadn’t been able to walk on your own feet in days, you’ve been knocked out and then carried everywhere. Though, as you walked you felt pain shoot through you from everything you’ve suffered. You pushed yourself, forcing yourself to continue walking despite the pain. You needed to find Bellamy, you needed to.

As you walked, you allowed your gaze to fall around you and soon enough you found a mirror. Distracted, you walked towards the mirror, you hadn’t seen your own reflection since you’d been on the Ark. It had been something you’d taken for granted back then, being able to just know what you looked like on a daily occurrence. As you reached the full length mirror, you paused, your hands falling onto your shirt and fingering the material. Your hair, though rather calm, was matted and looked like it needed a good wash.

Your eyes were bloodshot, and your skin looked heavily pale. You twisted your lips in disgust, you looked frankly just unwell. Though it made sense with everything you’d been through, it didn’t help with the fact that you have never seen yourself so unhealthy looking.

Suddenly you heard some voices, and turning your head you found a door. You looked one last time at yourself before stepping away from the mirror and made your way to the door. Your hand fell onto your hip, holding it hope that it might help lessen the pain and reached your hand out, placing it on the door nob. Hesitantly, you opened the door finding a room full of people. Blinking in confusion your eyes fell on a few familiar faces. There was Fox… and Harper and Miller. These were your friends. Your friends were directly in front of you and all you could feel was absolute confusion. Seeing your friends here was the last thing you’d expected walking through that door.

“I need to go back out the-” Turning your head towards the direction of the voice, your eyes widened when you saw the familiar face of Bellamy. His gaze was turned towards you with a small, relieved smile on his face. In fact, everyones gaze was on you and your hand fell to your chest in self-comfort. Your gaze fell around you, relieved but shocked to see your friends alive and well. You’d been so worried about them, you thought you’d never see them again but here they were.

“Bellamy?” Your voice was quiet, quieter than you’d wanted it to be. Bellamy, upon your call, stood up and began making his way over to you. “You’re still too weak, Y/N. You shouldn’t be up yet.” His hands fell on your arms, helping you stand steady.

You ignored his comment, looking around you. “Where am I? What’s happening?”

“You’re safe. I have you hidden.” Bellamy explained, reassuring you with a nod. “He’s not gonna find you in here.” You paused, unsure what to say besides nodding in thanks. You smiled up at him, happy to see that Bellamy was okay and relatively not injured. Happy that your friends were here and safe. But you couldn’t hide the hesitant nature of your smile, half expecting Cage to bolt through the door and hurt you and your friends all over again. “Listen, Y/N, I need to go back out. I’ve been running undercover,” he gestured to his outfit, “and there’s still more I need to do.”

That’s why he was wearing the guard uniform. You wasted no time hesitating as you nodded; “i’ll come with you.”

Bellamy chuckled at your need to always give yourself up to help, shaking his head. “You need rest. Besides if they catch sight of you out there, they’ll know exactly who you are.” You opened your mouth to refuse, wanting to go out there. That had been the original plan, this had been why you’d run in here with him. But Bellamy stopped you, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your forehead. You paused, unsure of how to react to such an intimate action. Especially with everyone watching, though before you could say anything he pulled away, smirking at your flushed face. 

You watched his back, his steps heavy and quick. “You better come back safe!” You called after him as he left the room. Falling silent, you turned to the crowd in front of you walking forward and greeting everyone. You smiled at everyone brightly, happy to see them alive and well before a voice caught your attention. “Is that Y/N?” You heard and turning around you found Monty. Your eyes widened with excitement and you ran forward, jumping into his arms, engulfing him in a hug.

“Monty!” You exclaimed in excitement. Monty laughed at your excitement and you responded by hugging him tighter in relief. You were so glad he was okay. He’d been one of the first people you’d really gotten to know and you hadn’t stopped worrying for him or Jasper since they’d disappeared. “Are you okay? Where’s Jasper?”

Monty’s hands fell onto your arms, steading you and you suddenly remembered your injuries. Though you ignored the pain, too eager to find out the answers to your questions. “I’m fine, but you need to keep still. You’re still too weak… And-”

“Jasper’s here.” A different voice answered and your gaze fell past Monty on Jasper. A heavy breath left you, and you laughed stepping forward over to Jasper. You embraced him tightly as well, happy to seem him well as well. Though as you pulled away, your gaze fell on to unfamiliar faces. Your heart sped up, thinking they were the Mountain men and you stepped back in fear. Jasper and Monty immediately noticed your panic and the latter grabbed onto you when you stumbled back.


“Mountain… who are they?” You asked, eyes crinkled in fear towards the two unfamiliar faces. Jasper was immediate to step in front of them, holding his hand out to you. “It’s okay!” He reassured, “they’re on our side. This is Maya and her father. They helped us, they’re the reason we’re able to hide here.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, stepping shakily over towards them. Maya smiled kindly at you, nodding as her father smiled brightly at you. “It’s nice to meet you.” Maya greeted and then her eyes fell on the rest of your body. “I’m sorry…” You immediately knew of what she was referring to and your mouth fell open in realization.

“These are your clothes.” You stated as she nodded nervously. Stepping forward, you smiled down at her, hesitantly, and nodded.

You looked up at the ceiling when a beep echoed from above you. All quiet chatter in the room went silent as you looked beside you at Jasper. “My fellow citizens.” You immediately recognized the voice from above as Cage. His voice was hard to forget, his haunting voice. “This is your president speaking. I have news to share with you, that will change our lives forever. For ninety-seven years, Mount Weather has been our home. It has kept us alive, but it has also held us captive. Most of us have made peace with what we’ve had to do to survive. We’ve done things for one reason so that our people can someday return back to the ground. That day is today.”

Your heart drop at his words, already understanding what he meant. You looked over at Jasper and Monty, shaking your head as Maya stared panicked at you all. Folding your hands on your lap, you clenched them so tightly that they began to hurt but you continued to do so.

“He’s going public.” You announced. “Trying to get everyone against us.” 

“Before my friend Lorelai Tsing was murdered-”

“The doctor…” You whispered to yourself in shock. No wonder you hadn’t seen her in a while at that point, she’d been murdered. Though, strangely, you felt no remorse within you. Before the mention of someone dying would’ve upset you terribly, and you sure it still did, just not for her. 

“What are we going to do?” Jasper asked to us all.

“By the outsiders still at large in this mountain, she found a cure. It was in their bone marrow.” Unconsciously, your fingers found their way to your hip, holding it in memory of everything she’d done to you and your friends. “This has been the dream of our people since the bombs, but to reach it now, I need your help. The forty-five.. no, fort-six, we found another survivor, trouble-maker she is. The forty-six criminals that irradiated level five, killing fifteen of our people, are now keeping us from our dream. Although we’ve repaired our home, we can never replace the lives that were taken from us. And as hard as it is to believe, there are those among us who would help the people that did this, and I am speaking to you now-”

Your gaze fell on Maya and her parents, unsure of how they were reacting. You knew Jasper and the rest trusted them, but you’d only just met them. You wanted to believe they’d stay on your side, but with a public announcement like this you never knew. 

“If you truly want to end the blood treatments once and for all, then the forty-six murderers your now hiding are the key to doing that.” You took a deep breath, shaking your head. This was bad.

“You have one hour to turn them in without punishment. After that, we’ll be forced to consider you enemies of the state. I’m asking you, please do what’s right for your people, our people, so we can all take our rightful place on the ground. We’re almost home.”

Turning to look over at the newcomers, you twisted your head in question. “So what’s it gonna be?”

“Y/N!” Jasper exclaimed in indignation. You turned to him, your eyes cold. “I don’t know them like you do, yes, but I will tell you one thing I am not going back in that lab. I will die before that happens.” You declared, standing up straight. With everything you’d been through, you didn’t trust anyone except for your own people.

“It won’t come to that.” Monty reassured.

“You don’t know that. People can change their mind quick enough when tempted.” You reminded, holding your hand out before you in defence. Maya stood up herself, stepping towards you and you took a step back in fear. Sensing your discomfort, she stepped back herself, holding out her hands. “Y/N, I promise you, that I will not give you in. That will not happen.”

“We’ll see.”

“One! Two!”

You looked at Jasper, nodding at him and without hesitated you pushed the picture frame away, stepping out with Jasper and Maya. You had been wrong about them, not trusting them. You hadn’t known Maya had to hide along with you, you didn’t know she’d already been considered a criminal. And you definitely didn’t expect the people keeping you hidden were willing to be shot in order not to give you all up, that was why you’d stepped out to give yourself up. You weren’t going to let another innocent die.

“Wait!” You yelled, holding up your hands. “Don’t shoot!”

“Please,” Jasper pleaded beside you, “don’t. We’re here, okay? Don’t shoot them.” Jasper compromised, your gaze fell on the couple as they seemed near tears. “I’m so sorry.” The man who’d helped keep you hidden apologized, shaking his head.

“This is Tilling, found three more.” The guard reported into his walkie-talkie. You shook your head, tears brimming in your eyes. You hated your knack for wanting to save everyone, but when your gaze fell on the couple you knew why. They were in the same predicament as you, just in different circumstances. “We’re bringing them in now.” A guard walked up to you, grabbing your wrists forcefully and placing handcuffs on them. You fought him, trying to get away but he only smirked at your feeble attempts.

A sudden gunshot echoed and you jumped in shock, your gaze falling on the woman with a gapping whole in her forehead. You gasped, trying to find something to say but couldn’t. Tears welled up in your eyes, as the guard moved his gun over to the man and shot him as well. You gasped loudly, shaking in your restraints.

“Keep struggling, sweetheart, and the same will happen to you.”

“Maya?” You called, walking up behind her and her father. She turned upon hearing your voice and when she looked at you, your gaze fell to the ground in shame. Though you all needed to move quickly, you needed to say this just incase. “Yes?” She answered.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you looked up into her eyes. “I’m sorry about earlier. I misjudged you.” Surprisingly, her face lit up in a smile, albeit a bit shaken, she nodded encouragingly at you. “It’s fine. I completely understand.” You nodded at her, relieved that she accepted your apology. She turned back to her father, as you all began making your way down the hall.

You paused for a moment hesitating before a hand fell on your shoulder. Turning, you found Bellamy. “You okay?” He asked, panting slightly as he stared around him cautiously. Nodding your head, you smiled up at him; “okay as i’ll ever be.”

He nodded, content with your answer as he turned back to make sure Jasper and the rest were following. “Okay, we need to get to the harvest chamber. You’ll be safer there.” You frowned in confusion, as right then that seemed almost the worst possible place you all could go when trying to get away with the Mountain Men. 

“Safe in the harvest chamber?” Jasper seemed to be thinking the same as you, as he asked just what you would’ve.

“Just trust me.” 

“Are the others there?” You asked, looking up at Bellamy and then Maya’s father. “Not yet.” Bellamy replied, shuffling with something in his jacket. 

“Monty?” Jasper asked.

“Monty’s with the other group on level three. Don’t worry, we moved him after the last sweep.” You nodded in response, glad they’d been able to get Monty out. Taking a deep breath, you prepared yourself to keep moving on. “You should go there next.” Maya’s father suggested to Bellamy, who immediately nodded.

“All right, go on. Vincent will take you.” Bellamy replied. “I won’t be long.”

“Hey!” Jasper yelled before Bellamy could stop, “i’m coming with you.” He said grabbing a gun from off the ground. Nodding to yourself, you moved around, looking for a weapon and found a gun for yourself on the ground. “Jasper.” Bellamy interrupted, shaking his head in disagreement. 

“I promised i’d protect them. That’s exactly what i’m gonna do.”

“And I promised i’d protect you.” You cut in, checking to make sure your gun had a significant amount of bullets in it. Smiling when you found a good amount, you looked up at Bellamy, smiling despite knowing this would only make him worry. “So, i’m coming with.”

You ran off with Bellamy when he reluctantly nodded, looking back at one last glance to see Maya coming. You smiled, nodding to yourself and continued running.

“We don’t have much time.” Bellamy grunted, opening up the air vent. You came out behind Jasper and Maya, listening closely to Bellamy’s words as you looked around a hallway you’ve never seen before. This place was bigger than you imagined, and considering you’ve been locked in one section of the place didn’t help. “The last twelve are on this level.”

“Including Monty.” Jasper panted, you nodded in his direction turning to Maya. “Which way?” You asked, watching as she raised her hand pointing down the hall in front of you. “This way.” A loud beep echoed in front of you but you barely paid attention, raising your gun in self-defence and walking forward with Bellamy. It wasn’t until Jasper left your side did you find yourself distracted, turning to find Maya still by the vent.

“Listen to me,” you heard Jasper whisper to Maya, holding out his hand in reassurance. “It’s gonna be okay. All right? You’re gonna be okay.” Your eyes softened upon his words, realization flooding within you. That’s why Jasper trusted her so much, you don’t know why you hadn’t seen it before. Smiling with a little bit of envy, you were glad Jasper had managed to find someone, and someone who was willing to go against her own people to do the right thing. “We’re not gonna let anything happen to you, are we?” Jasper asked, turning back to you and Bellamy.

You smiled nodding in confirmation as Bellamy nodded shortly, walking ahead. 

Maya’s panicked face didn’t lessen though, instead she only shook her head. “Jasper, in thirty minutes, all backup power gets diverted for species continuity. That means level five for life support and security. Radiation will seep in everywhere else. I can’t go to level five without being shot in the head.” You bit your lip, looking at Maya in sympathy as she looked only at Jasper. You couldn’t find anything to say that would offer any kind of support for the situation she was in, but that didn’t mean you didn’t feel bad for her.

“Guys, we need to keep moving.” Bellamy reminded, and you nodded walking over to where he stood. 

“We’ll get you your hazmat suit, extra oxygen, enough to last until your engineers get the power back on.” Jasper tried to think of a plan, tears welling in his eyes with desperation.

“And then what? You think Cage Wallace is gonna let me live here after that?” Maya reminded pitifully, the beep echoed again, the man’s voice sounding from above you all. You looked at Maya and Jasper in anticipation, watching as Jasper’s face twisted into anger. 

“Then we kill him.” You looked over at Jasper in shock, not expecting those words to come out of his mouth. The way you remembered him before all this was he was the type of person to fight for every other solution before it resolved to murder. Jasper nodded towards Bellamy and you watched as Bellamy nodded back, looking over at him as he shook his head at you.

A sudden scream came to your attention and you all turned down the hallway. “Monty.” Jasper whispered.

“Move! You heard him! Let’s go.” A males voice ordered and you raised your gun just in case. As you were running, Bellamy held out his hand in front of you, ordering you to slow. You listened to him, slowing down your steps as you turned back to the direction of the commotion. “Be ready for anything.” Bellamy reminded in a hush.

When you turned the corner there was a body laying on the ground in the distance. As you grew closer to the body you lowered your gun a hand falling to your mouth as the blood that surround the limp figure. Maya ran ahead, identifying the woman as “Ms. Ryan.” “She was hiding the last twelve.” Bellamy informed, and you took a deep breath. This wasn’t good. If she was here, dead, then where was the twelve?

“Where would they take them?” You asked Maya.

“It’s got to be level five.” She answered, you nodded, preparing yourself to move forward. Jasper moved towards the room, right where Bellamy was standing as he blocked him. You looked over at Maya in confusion, listening to Jasper breath heavily in panic. “Get out of my way.” He grounded out, staring directly in Bellamy’s eyes.

“Every person inside this mountain is on level five, every soldier.” Bellamy reminded. “Tell him.” Bellamy ordered Maya. You turned to Maya, not completely understanding what was going on. You figured it was because while all this was happening you’d been stuck inside a Cage.

“Jasper’s right.” Maya contradicted. “After the lockdown it’ll be impossible to get them out. It’s now or never.”

“All right-” Bellamy reluctantly agreed, “but how do we eve-” You crouched immediately when a thump sounded from behind you, raising your gun in self defence. Slowly Monty stepped out from behind the shadows, immediately falling to the ground near Ms. Ryan.


“What’s wrong?” You asked, watching as his face fell in pity and despair.

“They know about the grounders.” Monty mumbled, “that’s why I hid. I-I didn’t do anything to save the others. I let them kill Ms. Ryan.”

“What do you mean they know about the grounders?”

“It was on a soldiers walkie. They’re going for the harvest chamber.” You looked over at Bellamy, remembering that that was where Vincent had taken the others from before. Your hand fell to your forehead in disbelief, every time you seemed one step ahead, you never were and the Mountain men had some kind of leverage on you. 

“If they take it, we lose everyone.” Bellamy whispered, turning to you. You nodded, grabbing ahold of his arm and running ahead.

Opening the door to the harvest room, you shot in, your gun raised but found yourself slowing down when no one was there. Maya ran past you, sobbing and you turned to her in alarm but your mouth fell open when you saw her father on the ground, a hole in his forehead.

Turning to Bellamy, you saw him walk ahead and quickly followed behind him. Your gaze falling on all the empty cages around, cages that had once been full of grounders. Stopping just before the ledge, you looked at the vast amount of empty cages, gun falling to your side.

“They betrayed us.” You whispered, “they’re gone!” You shouted in despair, hands falling to your head in distress. A hand fell on your wrist, pulling your hand down so Bellamy could look in you in the eye. He nodded at you, reminding you to stay calm and you nodded your head, taking a deep breath. Suddenly, you remembered when you’d been locked in one of these cages; and though it seemed like the wrong time, you needed to tell him. “I saw you.” 

“What?” Bellamy asked in confusion.

“That day when we came here and everything went wrong, I saw them hauling you out of the cage above me. I needed to stop them, I needed to help you so I tried to get them to grab me.” You explained, looking around you at the empty cages. You could hear Maya’s soft cries in the distance, Jasper trying to reassure him and you shook your head.

“Why would you do that?” Bellamy asked, shocking you. You turned to him, your mouth left open in bewilderment. “Why would you put yourself in danger like that?”

You smiled lightly, your hand hesitantly reaching forward to grab his hand. “Because I care for you. Though it did nothing, I couldn’t see you be treated like that.”

“Oh, Bellamy…” 

Your lips twisted into a smile, relieved to see more familiar faces. Watching with fondness, you watched how Bellamy and Octavia shared a moment, hugging each other. You walked further out, behind Monty and Jasper as Octavia greeted her friends. “I knew it,” she teased, “you two are too scrawny to drill.” Octavia joked, poking them in the stomach. Finally as they finished hugging, Octavia caught sight of you and she let out a breath.

“Y/N.” She greeted and you nodded back, smiling. You weren’t sure if you should go for the hug or not, but then suddenly Octavia beckoned you over and her arms were around you. Though you’d never been that close with her before, it felt amazing to feel the familiar warmth of a person you trusted. Pushing back from her hug, you patted her shoulder, nodding.

Maya stepped out behind you, in her hazmat suit and you immediately noticed the look of hostility on Octavia’s face. You shook her head when she looked at you, Jasper moving to defend Maya; “it’s okay, she’s with us.” 

When the excitement died down, your eyes fell on Bellamy and Clarke as they once again shared a conversation you couldn’t hear. Your eyes fell to the ground, your smile dropping slightly as you clasped your hands together in discomfort. They had every right to talk, especially in a time like this and you shouldn’t be allowing yourself to get distracted like this. But you couldn’t help but sometimes feel jealous of the bond they shared, having to co-lead together. You hadn’t really realized it until Finn’s death when Clarke became solely more focused on Bellamy.

But when you looked back up, the same look in Clarke’s eyes wasn’t there. She was distracted, upset, almost looked betrayed. And though you couldn’t blame her because if your suspicions were true, the grounder army had betrayed you all, left you in the dust. But there was more, more hurt, more feeling behind it all and it just wasn’t something you could decipher. 

Stepping behind Jasper and Monty, you allowed them to share a hug with Clarke before stepping forward yourself. She smiled upon seeing you, stepping forward and reaching out for a hug. You squeezed her tight, and even though it seemed not like the time, you whispered in her ear; “you okay?” Clarke pulled back, seemingly shocked that you would ask her that, like you’d caught her before she smiled, nodding. Her gaze fell on your bruised face and weakened body. “Are you?” 

“As good as i’ll ever be.” You responded.

A beep echoed and in alarm you turned towards Maya who was checking her suit. Jasper ran forward, “thirty minutes.” He mumbled, “that can’t be right, we just changed it.” Panicking, Jasper turned to you all, shaking his head in distress; “this is her last tank.”

“Hey, uh. We’ll find you another one.” Clarke reassured and you smiled encouragingly, your smile though faded when she shook her head. “All the supplemental oxygen supplies are on level five.”

“We’ll get you to level five then.” You declared, looking over at Jasper who nodded his head. 

“Five isn’t safe for any of us.”

“We’ll take the trash chute again.” Jasper strategized. “It’ll work.”

“To get in, maybe.” Bellamy argued, “Maya’s right. Every soldier in this mountain is on that level. We’ll never make it out.”

“We can do it.” Jasper whispered, pleadingly. “We’ll split up.” You nodded along with his plan, hoping that Bellamy would go for it so you could save Maya. You hadn’t trusted her at first, but once you realized all that she had done for your friends, she didn’t deserve to just die.

Bellamy looked at you for an answer as Octavia declared, “you guys go for Dante. We’ll help Maya.” Frowning at him, you offered an apologetic look, shaking your head and looking towards Maya. You needed to help her. You’d be much more helpful there than you’d ever be talking to Dante. Giving a reassuring smile, you nodded at his worried look. “I’ll be fine.”

“You better be.”

“C’mon.” Jasper rushed, helping Maya out. You stepped out after her, turning to help Octavia. “She’s out of air.” 

“First you need to close the vent.” Maya ordered and you were quick to turn, closing the vent. When you turned back around, Maya’s helmet was off and she was taking deep breaths, trying to regain herself. “Time to spare.” She gasped, and you let out a small chuckle, shaking your head.

“She’s safe. Can we go now?” Octavia rushed, looking around her for anybody coming. “It’ll be okay.” Maya reassured, and you shook your head along with him. “I’m not leaving you.” Jasper declared holding on to Maya.

“I’m not leaving either.” You smiled her way, “not now.”

“Y/N!” Octavia whispered in urgency.

“She’s alive.” You stated, shaking your head. “But she isn’t safe.” You looked over at Jasper who looked over at you thankful, you nodded, smiling. They needed your help and you definitely weren’t going to leave them alone up here. You just got your friend back, you weren’t going to just leave him because he wanted to save his girlfriend.

“Cage knows i helped you guys.” Maya panted. “He’s on level five.”

“So what do we do?” Octavia asked, looking around her.

“We kill Cage.” Your eyes widened, remembering that exact line from earlier. Looking over at Jasper, you swallowed a lump in your throat watching as Maya nodded in confirmation and Octavia declared she was in. They looked over at you and biting your lip in worry, you remembered all that he had done to you, all that he had done to your people, your friends. Nodding to yourself, you looked over at them, determine.

“I’m in.”

“Cage is in the dorms. They brought another group in from the Ark, more marrow. They’re not even trying to fix the dam.” Your heart dropped at the mention of another group being brought in, that could be your father. That could be Raven. Taking deep breaths to calm yourself, you tried to remain calm.

“How many soldiers were with Cage?” Jasper asked.

“Uh, six. Why?” The guard, Lee, Maya had brought in to help answered. Looking up at Jasper in question. Jasper didn’t answer, taking his gun from off his side, he looked over at Lee, “just get me close. They’ll be happy they found another eight doses. I need a-” 

Octavia stepped up, handing Jasper a knife. “Aim for the throat. Slash, don’t stab. Make it deep.” She explained, showing the movements with the knife. You bit your lip in worry, not liking the plan that would most likely get Jasper killed if he wasn’t careful. Nodding Octavia’s way, Jasper sniffled as Lee restrained his wrists with cuffs.

You sent him a smile, nodding and telling him without actually telling him he could do it. He sent you a grateful smile, turning to Maya as she made her way up to him. You couldn’t hear what they were saying but you watch with fondness and pride as they shared a moment. Who knew Jasper could be such a badass? You thought to yourself, laughing.

“I love you…” You faintly heard Jasper whisper and then he was gone, walking through the doors. You looked over at Maya, your eyes softening at her tear stricken face. Stepping forward, you placed your hand softly on her shoulder, snapping her attention over to you. You offered a small smile, hoping that would help reassure her a bit more. “He’s got this. I know Jasper, and he’s pretty tough when he puts his mind to it.”

She nodded, a silence falling over you. You figured Maya was just too nervous to respond. “Hey…” You started, “thank you for all this.” She looked over at you, finally smiling and you smiled yourself, glad that you could even break her moment of sadness for a second. Then suddenly her face fell and you turned to her concerned. 

“There was man in there.” she started. “I couldn’t stay long but I heard him screaming your name, asking where his daughter was.” Opening your mouth, you found yourself stock still. That was your father, no doubt about it and he was stuck in there in danger, asking for you. You couldn’t remember the last time your father had been so considered with your life.

You looked at the doors in hesitation.

There were hands on you, shoving you at the ground. You groaned in pain, trying to shove them off but they only continued to press the gun harder against the back of your skull. Panting, you swallowed, trying to hide your fear. You were sure you were gonna die. Any second now and they’d blow there gun, or maybe they’d torture you like they had for so long.

Then there groans of pain, screams of pain, you looked around you as best as you could in shock as every one of the mountain people fell to the ground in pain. The hands on you disappeared, and sitting up on your knees you watched the guards around you fall to the ground. Maya. Turning your head to the side, your gaze fell on Maya, her face red and blotching and her breath coming out in short gasps. 

You scrambled over to her, grabbing ahold of her and setting her on your lap as Octavia fell beside you. Tears welled in your eyes as a shadow loomed over you, looking up you found Jasper staring down at Maya in shock. You shook your head at him, letting Jasper grab her and hold her. “Jasper.” She gasped out, her voice rough.

You fell, sitting as you brought your knees up to your chest. “I’m here.” Jasper whispered, his lips curling in despair as tears fell from his eyes. “She was innocent.” Looking up at Jasper upon his words, you shook your head. 

“None of us is innocent.” She let out one final gasp of air, before her body gave up, becoming limp. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. Jasper’s cried of disbelief filling your ears. You got up slowly, tripping over yourself as Octavia ran past you. You knew where she was going, and you knew you should go but you found yourself stunned as you stared at the mass of dead bodies.

Clarke stepped past a pillar, stopping when she saw Jasper. Looking down at Maya, you shook your head. “What did you do?” Jasper sobbed, shaking his head in disbelief. 

“We had no choice.” Clarke whispered, her voice shaking.

“I was gonna kill Cage.” You looked down, watching as your hands shook before placing your head in them. You shook your head in them, images of innocent people dead around you. Maya dead. Jasper in pain. It was all too much. “If you’d just given me one more minute, it would’ve been over.”

“Jasper, they would’ve never stopped.” Bellamy suddenly spoke up. Your head snapped up upon his entrance, finding yourself shocked that he would help do this. Despite your horror you found no anger towards him, just hurt. He’d done what he had to, you knew that, and you knew you couldn’t be mad at him. But that didn’t stop you from shaking your head at him when he looked at you, tears in your eyes.

“We have to go to the dorms.” 

Bellamy stepped forward, falling still in front of you. He shook his head, opening his mouth to say something but you interrupted him; “it’s fine.” You nodded, sending a small weak smile. “It’s fine.”

“Raven!” Running forward, you shot through the crowd, narrowly missing everybody. You stopped just before Wick and Raven, looking over the unconscious figure of Raven. With wide eyes, you scanned her body for anymore major injuries other than what they had done to her. “Is she okay?” You asked Wick frantically, your hand falling on her face.

He nodded, though you didn’t see it only the hand that clasped around your wrist, snapping your attention to Wick. “She’s okay. She’ll be okay. Y/N, someone else wants to see you.” Wick nodded his head to the side and you followed his gaze, only to find your father looking over at you. You let out a small sob, unsure of what to do. Seeing him okay was the biggest relief, and despite everything that had happened between the two of you, he was your dad. You never even got the chance to tell him you’d been going with Bellamy to the mountain.

Without a second thought, you ran forward, ignoring the pain that shot through you, reaching him within seconds. It was just like that day he’d returned from being captured by the grounders, except this time when you threw your arms around him, he didn’t hesitate to return the hug. Instead he hugged you with such force, with warmth you’d never felt. Tears fell from your eyes, snuggling your head into his neck.

“I was so worried.” He whispered against your neck, and you didn’t even care that that was such an un-Kane thing to do. “You didn’t even tell me.”

“I’m sorry.” You sobbed. “i’m sorry.” It wasn’t hard to tell that this was more than just you not telling him about your plan, this was so much more. “I’m sorry that mom died because of me.” Hands gripped your face, pulling you back from the hug so all you could see was your fathers eyes on your own. He smiled lightly, shaking his head. “Your mother dying wasn’t your fault.” He reassured and your mouth fell open, “I never should of thrown you away like I did. I’m sorry.”

You found yourself unsure of how to reply, these words were words you never expected to hear come from your father’s lips. You just nodded, your nose scrunching up as more tears from your face. He held you, allowed you to cry, acted like the father you’d always cry about not having. Kane said the words you use to dream about hearing;

“I love you, Y/N.”

“Where’s she going?” You asked, walking up to Bellamy. Hearing you, his gaze fell on you, tears in his eyes. Immediately knowing that this was more than what you thought it had been, you went to walk out the gate to followed Clarke. Something was different, something was happening and you needed to stop it, but Bellamy’s arms wound around your waist. You looked over at him. “where’s she going?” You repeated, more stern.

“Clarke wants to go on her own. She needs to think things over.” He explained and you shook your head, looking over at him. Your gaze fell on the disappearing figure of Clarke, an unsettling feeling in your stomach. Stopping your struggles, you moved to stand in front of him but surprisingly he kept his hands on your waist. You ignored the intimate action, looking up at Bellamy with curiosity and a bit of fear. 

“Do you?” 

“No.” He answered almost immediately, leaving no room for questions. “I’m not leaving you. Not again.” Bellamy responded honestly, you opened your mouth to say something, your gaze falling on the arms upon your waist. He looked at you with such intensity, you were unsure of what he was going to do. Then suddenly, looking up at him you watched as his face grew closer, and then his lips were on yours. Your eyes widened, not expecting him to do such a thing, pulling back, you placed your hands against his chest, panting.

He stared at you, shocked and afraid as you practically just rejected him. “Y/N?” He mumbled, asking for an answer. With wide eyes, your gaze fell on your father, remembering how you’d just gain his trust and love. Your gaze fell on Raven, knowing that she needed you in this time. And Jasper, Bellamy was responsible for killing Jasper’s girlfriend. And you knew he didn’t mean it and you weren’t mad at him, but it wasn’t right. It didn’t feel right.

You know you’d liked him for so long now, probably even grown to love him. This was something you’d secretly wanted for so long. But it just didn’t seem like the right time. So keeping your hands against his chest, you looked up at him apologetically. “I can’t.” You shook your head, whispering so that he could almost barely hear you. “I can’t, not now. I’m sorry.”

Bellamy didn’t argue, only whispered one word; “why?”

“My dad. I just got him back. And Raven. She needs me.” 

You watched Bellamy shake his head. “I know that’s not why.” He argued, his eyes pleading for you to tell the truth. “I was so worried, when i didn’t find you in those cages I thought you were dead.” He explained, his lip curled in disappointment. Sighing, your hands fell from his chest, taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself. “You helped kill all those people, Bellamy.” Bellamy’s face fell when he heard those words, stepping back in distress. “All those innocent people and I know you had to…” Stepping back yourself, you turned towards your father, seeing him looking in your direction. “But it just isn’t the right time.” 

With that, you didn’t dare look back at Bellamy’s face. You didn’t dare look back to see the disappointment and feel your heart crush even more. Instead you walked directly forward, keeping your eyes on your father and when you reached him, you smiled lightly. “Everything okay?” He asked.

Finally, you allowed yourself to turn your head, catching sight of Bellamy looking over at you. Keeping your tears in, you nodded; “fine.”

anonymous asked:

Do you have any tips/suggestions for someone starting an art history masters program in the fall? Maybe how to manage imposter syndrome (which I'm already feeling...)?

At the time I am writing this, you have probably just begun your Master’s program. My sincere apologies that I wasn’t able to reply sooner, but I hope the advice below will still be useful to you. 

Part One: The MA Program

When starting your MA program, make a list of all important department due dates or deadlines for things like financial aid, enrollment deadlines, and degree requirements (e.g., language exam date, comprehensive exam date, thesis due date). Ensure you understand the degree requirements: the number of courses you have to take (and in what areas), whether or not your program requires a comprehensive examination, how many languages you will be required to test in to receive your degree, how many readers your thesis should have, and if there are any special requirements for your thesis. Also take note of financial opportunities available to new or repeat graduate students including tuition or stipends, travel grants, or photography grants. Some funding will only be open to second-year students, some will only be open to doctoral students, some to ABD, and so on. If you have a teaching or TA assignment, make sure you’re aware of any training sessions you are required to go to and introduce yourself to your faculty supervisor, if you have one.

Once you’ve figured out the red tape, get a layout of your campus, if you aren’t familiar with it already. Get to know the staples of your department (who processes the paperwork? is there an image library? where is the Chair’s office and your advisor’s office? etc.) and find out whether or not your program has a dedicated graduate student lounge. Figure out where the library is, what resources the library offers, and what databases your school subscribes to. Also see if your library offers individual study corrals for graduate use, lockers, or conference rooms. (This probably seems like common sense, but I’m including it here just in case.) If you like coffee, tea, or beer, try local coffeeshops and bars for environments you like and could potentially study/work in. (Because working in an Irish bar is definitely something I have never done …) Figure out what local eateries are fast, cheap, and do not have a throng of undergrads, since sometimes you will only have a few minutes between classes and will need to grab something quick. (More common sense, but every campus town is different – there were some marked differences between certain places on campus at my alma mater that took way too long to figure out.) Next, see if your school has discounted transportation tickets, museum/theater/movie tickets, gym discounts (or a gym on campus!), restaurant discounts, and so on. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, familiarize yourself with physical and mental health services available to graduate students.

So, by now you’re comfortable with your new institution and department – onto academics.

In my experience, there are three key factors to success in graduate school:

1.     Time management. Start papers early and finish them early; leave time for revision.

2.     Selfcare & maintaining extra-curricular relationships. Make sure you have people you can confide in, whether they are friends, family, or professionals. Don’t get lost in your work; nurture your relationships. Part of selfcare involves keeping your academics in check: striving for excellence in your work, rather than perfection, is mentally more manageable. Take some time each day to completely relax and take your mind off academe.

3.     Continual improvement of your skillset and knowledge. You were already awesome when you entered graduate school, but you need to work on improving your weaknesses and honing your strengths. You also need to learn as much as possible about your area of specialty, so read, read, read. Lastly, keep your career in mind: watch for CFPs, fellowship, internship, and teaching opportunities.

As far as what to expect with regard to coursework, you will likely be expected to take courses across a variety of time periods and cultures. Thus, you might encounter art from a culture or period you aren’t familiar. A little intimidating, right? Maybe, maybe not. If this happens, read as much as you can about the subject before the first day of class to try to get up to speed, and try to draw connections between the unfamiliar subject and what you do know. On another note, remember that you will be expected to know how to read at least 1 language other than English. You will be tested on this in your official language exam(s), but you will also be unofficially tested during coursework when do the weekly readings, participate in discussion, or write papers (i.e. doing research in X language related to your area of specialty). Be prepared to receive constructive criticism on your papers from your peers if your program requires students read their term work aloud; in the same vein, be prepared to provide constructive criticism to your peers.

I’m sure there are other aspects of coursework I’m not mentioning here, but this is what I can think of at this late hour.

Keep in mind that graduate school is what you make it. You get what you put in. These statements are cliché, but they’re true.

Part Two: Imposter Syndrome

With regard to how to overcome imposter syndrome, I was going to type my advice, but I honestly couldn’t say it better than the author of this article, which I hope you find valuable. Before you click through to the link, though, please know that if you are experiencing imposter syndrome, or if you experience it in the future, you aren’t alone. I have experienced it, as have most graduate students. The hallmark of imposter syndrome is that a person feels like a fraud and will be found out and exposed as such. He or she thinks they don’t actually know anything about their field, don’t deserve to be where they are, that they didn’t earn it, and they’re just going through the motions. 

If this sounds like something you are feeling, take a breath. Allow reality to set in: You got where you are because you earned it. You are accomplished and will continue to accomplish things. Your department believes in you and recognizes your potential, or else you wouldn’t be there. If your cohort has more accomplishments than you (publications, fellowships, scholarships, etc), that’s fine – we all work at our own pace, to the timing that is meant to be. Be aware of your role in your success, but stay humble at the same time. There is only so much you can achieve in a day, month, or year, and you need to balance your ambition with your physical and mental ability and stamina. 

Imposter syndrome manifested alongside severe panic attacks for me, and at the time, I was too stubborn to take the hour or so to visit a professional for help. If you find that you suffer from anxiety or panic attacks, I strongly recommend visiting a therapist or doctor for coping strategies and/or medication, depending on your personal situation.  (For more advice, again, see this article.)

I hope this helps! I didn’t do enough affirming of your accomplishments in the above text – trust me, anon, you are where you are because you deserve to be there. Go do great things!