cleaning before and after

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Transition Update #29 (31 weeks on T)

(Please don’t reblog this!)

I met with my nurse practitioner yesterday for a routine checkup and I’m getting my blood tested again, but she told me everything looks fine.  I’m staying on my dose of .35mL because I’m comfortable with the rate my changes are happening.  I have one dose left in my T vial so I got another one today and found out that my insurance now covers my hormones!!! Which is awesome and I hope it means they’ll help pay for top surgery too.

I also trimmed my beard a bit because it was getting out of control in my opinion.  I don’t really want to grow it out.  I like it short and maintained, so I got a cheap beard trimmer at CVS and cleaned it up a bit.  Left is before and right is after.  It’s a subtle change but I like it.  I’m also super grateful that this is a problem I have at only a little over 7 months on T.

Last week I spent a lot of time talking about physical changes, and nothing of note has happened in a week, so this time I wanted to talk about emotional changes, because I’ve kind of glossed over those for a while.

I’ve definitely noticed that I’ve been crying less.  I used to not be able to have a difficult conversation without crying, and now I’ve had several very calm and neutral.   I really, really like this change, partially because it makes me feel more masculine but also that I never liked how easily I cried.  I think this is also due to getting the right cocktail of mental health meds (and taking them regularly) and finally getting on the hormones in the first place, but the T is definitely a factor in my mind and my nurse practitioner thinks so too.

In general I’m so much more confident and happier now that I pass.  I’m still nervous going into men’s bathrooms, but I’m doing it anyway because I feel I look strange in women’s bathroom now.  Every time I get called sir or something like that in public my heart just soars.  I sometimes still get misgendered over the phone, but I’m giving my voice time.

11 months in! I feel FABULOUS! Down 88 pounds total. My goal was to lose 100 in a year. I am not going to do anything drastic to lose 12 pounds in a month for the sake of a number, but I am going to continue to get stronger and enjoy all I have accomplished so far. I feel like I have already won. Seeing more muscle everyday is pretty sweet too!

I just wanted to take a minute to share this. On the left was at my college graduation party, in October of 2011. The right is today, 5 years and 1 month later. Half of a decade has passed since I was that person on the left and it’s almost impossible to believe. Five years, wow…in that time I have changed so many things in my life. I ended a relationship/engagement that made me ultimately miserable. I cut out drinking and partying more often than not. I also got LASIK surgery and ditched the glasses, too. I spent time with myself being single & figuring out what made Autumn, well, Autumn. I learned to love myself and make myself happy, and then I met Shawn. He’s the only human I ever want to spend my life with. You’ve got to love yourself before anyone else but that makes it all the sweeter. I’ve learned just how to fuel my body & feed it healthily while still enjoying life and food in general. Additionally, I have fallen in love with fitness; CrossFit to be more specific. And I was finally able to free myself from the loose, excess skin that comes with major weight loss. I have spent this last half of a decade making a better version of myself. And I can promise that I will only improve from here.😌

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I haven’t been on here in a really long time! Stress got the best of me with school and my weight fluctuated for the past year. But, I’m happy with the progress I’ve made and I’m continuing to work hard now and everyday! 

The pictures on the left are from January of 2016 at my highest weight of 260lbs

On the right is from today 230lbs. And I’m really so proud of myself and excited to see where I’ll get! 

Some of this has been slow, steady progress over the last month, though about half was a rush to finish before friends came over today.

Computer table

Loveseat and craft bookcase

Sofa

And the television/bookcase

The friends who visited want a cat, and I have four, so the cat toys and boxes on the floor aren’t clutter; they’re meant to lure my shy kids into being sociable.

(Some of the loveseat-area clutter got shoved in the bedroom for my friends’ visit, which is a no-no in the long run, but I’ve already gone through one of those bags and trashed/shredded/recycled most of the contents and put away the stuff I decided to keep.)

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Before and after; I’ve had a really shitty cold for the last week and a bit, got it after coming back from a ski trip so i was in no mood to clean and everything progressed into Trash Mountain. It took about 15 minutes to clean the desk, and my whole room took about 30 mins with a 5 minute break to pet my rabbit and watch my gerbils destroy a piece of cardboard i found for them …i should really do something with my fish tanks other than shitty storage ahaha 

Showing off my success for @unfuckyourhabitat thanks for the inspiration! I have a clean workspace again!

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Today’s efforts at unfuckening the house.

For a while both my partner and I were busy with work or sick, so the house got a bit messy and I decided this morning I was going to fix that!

Took me four 20/10’s (give or take a few minutes here or there) and got the bedroom tidied and laundry away, lounge room tidied and vacuumed, and kitchen cleaned and most of the dishes cleaned and put away.

There’s still a bit to do (not pictured) that might have to wait until my partner can help me with it. It feels nice to be in a clean room again!

Well it’s been a really long time since I’ve posted one of these. It has also been a long and trying year. This year in trying to take care of sick parents I fell back into the habit of not really caring for myself.

However, I have been slowly focusing on finding balance again. I have removed the scale from my house. And making an effort to move everyday. It’s always tougher for me to do so in the winter I am such an out doors type person that going to the gym for cardio is just SO blaaaaah

Now I am going to make an effort to return to my blog. So I am posting a new before and during (I never felt like I could post one cause I hadn’t lost anymore ‘weight’ but I have realized that is silly because I have worked out all year and know my body composition has changed.)

Photo on the left was Summer 2013 and Photo on the right is current. ☺️☺️