What do you do when you feel disconnected from those around you or when you're feeling burnt out? What advice would you give to combat loneliness?
I write. I play music loudly. I put extra lotion on my face and hands, and I sing softly under my breath. I make myself dinner, usually something I haven’t had in a while. I try not to look at the news. I wear a sheer or lacy bra under a soft soft sweatshirt that has a hole in the right cuff. I take a long hot shower. I clean my stove. I call my mother. I put on make up and dance with my cat in my arms across the room.
I grab a book and I go out and sit at the end of the bar and I order a double rye whiskey with almost no ice. I read and sip. I casually glance about.
I play the music even louder and I take off my socks and I flex my feet. I revel in how many different places my feet have taken me. I might feel sad about the people who’s feel may have brushed mine. Whether it was my college best friend and I on the couch in my apartment sipping hot tea and laughing uproariously as our feet rested next to each other. Or maybe the first time my ex and I made love in the morning on the couch in his apartment and our feet kept brushing. Or the times my feet brushed against a friends as we stood close, or under a table in a crowded bar.
I go through the packed and disorganized drawers in my house and find a matchbook from my favorite bar in Manhattan and I try and remember how I used the only two matches that are missing. I think about sharing drinks with friends at that bar and how nice it was to be familiar with Nolita and it’s streets and gems.
I burn sage and incense. I don’t say a word for hours. I practice my signature and lament at the fact that Katharine never looks good compared to my rushed and crazed last name in pen. I water my plants and I rearrange all the furniture in my apartment.
I text everyone who makes my soul sing, and never worry about them getting back to me. Just letting them know that they’re on my mind.
Be kind to yourself. Excessively. Be sweet and gentle. Take time for yourself and do almost nothing. It helps. Then, take the time to be ruthlessly productive. Tackle your closet. Or a project you’ve set aside. Don’t stay still too long, but don’t rush. Just ride it out while staying aware.