pls expand on your ridiculous experiences during one semester at a fake college
okay I got a few asks about this so let me see what I can remember right now. These might not all be in chronological order
- At orientation, they were talking about the reservation near campus and all these pretty sites and this kid in the back of the auditorium goes “So uhh…heard this place might be built over a Native American burial ground?”
- The speaker: “…Let’s not think about that, okay?”
- The freshman were on campus alone for like a week and a half (other than the RA’s) before the other students and I just. The parties. Were out of control. An ambulance was called basically every night.
- I walked into the bathroom the first night there to find a girl literally dying because someone slipped something in her drink and she was having a Very Bad Reaction
- Sting- you know, the singer- ‘s son lived in my residence hall. This boy almost accidentally killed me on three separate occasions (while I was just trying to do my laundry)
- I told my family about this at Thanksgiving. Everyone in the room advised me to seduce him
- I ate breakfast in the dining hall exactly once. I got scrambled eggs. I noticed no one had brought out ketchup with the condiments and politely asked about it. I received glares from at least ten different people. Apparently people there don’t believe in ketchup on eggs.
- There were these two boys in my English class known as “The Lumbard Guys”. They didn’t live in my residence hall, but they would come over almost every night, start a party, and destroy part of the basement.
- At orientation this one kid got mad and set his shoe on fire to prove a point
- Also at orientation like??? My roommate disappeared???? And I never saw her again???
- Listen like…this campus just looked like the perfect setting for a horror film, but none of the people from the area got that. They all thought I was crazy until some comic from Comedy Central did a stand up act and said “Why the hell is this campus so creepy? I feel like I’m gonna leave here with someone else wearing my face!”. I felt way too validated.
- ALL OF MY CLASSES WERE SO FAKE
- My “math” class was actually a disguised home ec. course???? All we had were word problems that were incredibly detailed recipes or instructions on how to fix things. The teacher, who I swear to GOD was actually my Mr-Rogers-Wannabe guidance counselor from high school in disguise, spent more time trying to come up with names and backstories for the models in the text book than actually trying to teach
- I had to take a class called “first year seminar” because neither of my parents went to college. It was supposed to be teaching you about how the school works and stuff but SUPRISE BITCH WE’RE JUST GONNA YELL ABOUT RACISM AND PRIVELGE FOR AN HOUR.
- Literally that’s all we did. Just the whole class bonding over all these struggles we had gone through and getting fired up. Like, it was great, but I also ended up knowing very little about campus and school stuff bc that was the class that was supposed to be teaching me lmao
- My Psych teacher was fucking hysterical for the first few classes but then he just. Vanished. I had to drop the class
- My Fine Arts teacher just. Couldn’t stick to a teaching plan. Her entire wardrobe was scarves. She was very passionate about African masks. She had a flapper haircut. She spoke quietly, but with a marvelously forced tone of voice that I’m certain was her trying to sound impressive and hide a Boston accent. She didn’t seem to understand the year was 2014. She took us into the city to go to the Art Museum and we lost her in there, never to be seen again
- I’m not even kidding
- My “writing” teacher was my absolute fav omfg. She was this long grey haired hippie lady who worked as a nurse for the Grateful Dead and was still stuck there. She may or may not have hooked up with my uncle. I was her favorite student because one day I came in wearing a “HAIR” shirt. She wanted to take the class to England for the sole purpose of going on a Beatles tour
- But like…she did not teach a writing class omfg. She taught a social justice class. All we did was have informed debates about The Issues and listen to music and occasionally watch the Breakfast Club. Every time there was a big paper due on the syllabus, she’d just sit on her desk and go “I mean, I don’t have to cover anything, right? You guys know how to write!” Like I genuinely don’t think she knew what class she was teaching
- There was a boy who sat next to me in that class. He was deaf in one ear and used that as an excuse when he got caught blatantly not paying attention. It worked every time. But I was right next to him. I saw him playing Yu-Gi-Oh on some website on his phone under the table. One time we started talking about model cars and he pre-cummed.
- There was a boy who roamed the campus in a long black trench coat and a weird hat. I never saw his body and started to suspect he might not have one, just the theory of one. He took interest in me because I was the only person in class who ever got his Doctor Who jokes. He’d come up to me at dinner and blast quiz me on various nerd culture before running off and disappearing into the shadows. Just as I was starting to grudgingly accept I was probably going to have to eventually hook up with him for the greater good, I apparently offended him by saying I like Picard more than Kirk. He didn’t stick around to listen to my reasoning. Whenever I saw him after that he would loudly start talking about how great his girlfriend was. Everyone knew he was lying. I wonder if Kirk ever sucked his theoretical dick as well as I would have.
- I gave a football player a shout out on Yik Yak. He really appreciated it, and gave me some fries laced with weed as a thanks. That was such A Night ™ , I watched the Lorax and left the dimension.
- Every time we had dances, this creepy guy named Horace would find me and use my obvious discomfort to make me dance with him. He’d hold my wrists and shove his crotch on mine while vaguely swaying to the beat. I had to escape to the bathroom every few minutes. Finally the security just banned him from the events altogether. I can still see his face clearly in my mind.
- One night, I walked into the bathroom to find a perfect, untouched pizza laying on the floor…but not in a box. Someone literally just took it out of the box and laid it down. I’m still fuming.
- One time I was in the mostly empty library when I smelled something. I walked down the rows of shelves before rounding the corner, and found the President of the college hidden there, sitting on the floor, smoking, a bottle of vodka in his hands. We held eye contact for a solid minute. He slowly shook his head at me. I said “Sir, your house is like…literally across the street.” He shook his head more vigorously. I left the library.
- One night, I heard screaming. I looked out the window to find a girl in a giraffe costume scaling my building. People were throwing water bottles at her. I was concerned. I didn’t know who to talk to for answers.
- I was in line trying to pay for dinner. One of the lunch ladies climbed on top of the ice cream machine and refused to come down. Her friend came over and they started recreating the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet. Very few people acknowledged it.
- Someone jacked up the soda dispenser so it was only dispensing beer. None of the staff cared enough to fix it.
- I caught my RA in the middle of a drug deal so she gave me a coupon for free ice cream
- Also side note: The soft served ice cream machine on campus was actually a frozen yogurt machine. I had no problem with that, but like, advertise correctly, you know? Nobody else seemed to understand my confusion. Nobody else seemed to understand that froyo and ice cream are two different things. What the hell.
- There were just…so many moths all over the campus. A terrifying amount. When it started getting colder I was like, finally, I won’t be attacked by moths anymore! Only for even more moths to appear. I asked a local about it. “Oh, those are the winter moths!” What the fuck are winter moths? What the fuck, Massachusetts? My friend back home grew convinced that Mothman was in the area. I was inclined to believe her. Sometimes I close my eyes and all I can see are moths everywhere, waiting for the moment to strike.
- I’ve encountered deer many times in my life. I know how they act around people. But the deer on this campus were just weird. They’d run out at people all the time. One almost shoved me into traffic.
- My roommate gave my phone number out to literally anyone she found who mentioned they liked to read or liked Doctor Who. She was concerned I had no friends. No one ever called.
- I met a small Greek girl in my Fine Arts class. Our first day of talking, she made me climb a mountain with her so she could get to tutoring, even though I had no reason to be in that building. Her roommates kept mysteriously disappearing. She was late to everything. She’d call me randomly to get food at 1 in the morning. She kept somehow breaking phones and tvs and other electronics. When I asked her how they kept breaking, she waved it off with “Oh, I have OCD. You wouldn’t understand”. I have OCD, and I still don’t understand. One time she invited me out with her friends from high school. I waited outside her building for two hours, while the other friends waited in the parking lot for two hours, because we didn’t know how to find each other. She eventually came outside at 10:30 pm. We went to Friendly’s. She made us stop at her house so she could grab something. We pulled up a long, winding driveway and stopped in a parking lot. At the end of the parking lot were stone stairs that lead up to a mansion on a hill. She ran inside and the rest of us stayed in the car, listening to High School Musical and talking about Supernatural. When she came out 40 minutes later we decided to try and prank her. It went wrong. We almost ran over her friend’s sister with the car. They invited me to a pumpkin patch. When I started complaining about my roommate, she asked me to move in with her. I thought about the other three girls who had seemingly gone missing. I politely declined. Six months after I left the school, I received a text from her asking for notes for an exam, and radio silence after that. I can’t find her on facebook. I fear she might have gone missing too.
- One night, as I was standing outside huddled in the cold, a boy came up and offered me a cigarette to help me stay warm. I turned it down, but he stood around talking to me for a few minutes afterwards. I felt absolutely no awkwardness at all. He was a musician from Colorado. He sang a bit of one of his songs. He was dropping out of school to go to California the next week. He told me I had beautiful eyes, but his were the most alive eyes I’ve ever seen so I couldn’t believe the compliment. We talked for about ten minutes and I fell a little bit in love. He had to rush off to a club meeting, but he told me he’d rather keep talking. He gave me the sweetest smile before he left. I didn’t get his last name or number and I never saw him again.
- There was a dance on Halloween. I couldn’t think of a sufficiently slutty yet classy costume, so I just went as Osgood from Doctor Who. When I got there there was a huge crowd, but people quickly grew bored and started leaving. There ended up being six people left (myself included). We stayed because we could see the upset faces of everyone who had planned the event, but actually had one of the most fun nights of my life. We- myself, the girl from across the hall, Trench Coat Boy, his tiny friend who never spoke, and a boy and girl I didn’t know who seemed to be professional dancers- danced nonstop for almost three hours. The strobe lights and poppy music solidified an unspoken bond. I had never and to this day haven’t felt as free as I did that night. The tiny quiet boy’s smile could have lit up a city. It’s etched into my mind. We all left the dance talking about the surreal feeling in the air, as if something had shifted. None of us ever mentioned the dance again. It’s still one of my fondest memories.
- For a solid month, there was someone in a gorilla costume running around campus.
- There was a rash of sexual assaults on campus. A gang of boys kept jumping girls in the woods. The only thing the school board did was give out free rape whistles at lunch one day. I missed that day, making me one of the only students on campus without a whistle. Later that night when I ordered pizza, the delivery guy tried to start up a conversation with me about all the assaults. He blamed the girls. I took back my tip.
- Sometimes the showers just…filled up with black sludge. No one knew why.
- The girls in the room next to me were very bizarre. They always shot me odd looks and whispered to each other constantly. I couldn’t figure out if they were sleeping together or not. They never washed their hands when we were in the bathroom.
- The doors to each dorm were thick and heavy and required effort to push them open. My roommate and I made sure to lock ours every night, and would triple check it. It swung open by itself almost every night. The channels on the tv would change with the remote equidistance away from us. Sometimes I heard humming in the showers when I was the only one in there.
- My roommate…deserves a whole separate post dedicated to her, honestly.
- She would call her mother and have her do her homework for her. She blasted music constantly, and it was either country or hard rap, nothing in between. She sexiled me constantly. I once walked in on anal. She’d meet guys on Tinder, fall in love with them after a couple of days, and then bring them into the school and into our room like it was no big deal. One of them made it clear he was a budding serial killer. She was in a new drama every week. One time someone called her a dilf on Yik Yak. She was firmly convinced her cousin was blonde because her aunt dyed her hair when she was pregnant. She tried her hardest to get me laid by a football player. She was the loudest drunk I’ve ever encountered. Honestly there’s just too much about her for this omfg
- John Zaffis, the famous paranormal researcher, came to the school on my birthday. I went because I’m a loser who’s been watching shows with him since I was a kid, and I was having a bad day so I decided it could be a treat. I sat in the front row. He held an uncomfortable amount of eye contact with me the entire presentation. He was impressed with my questions. He lamented about the fact he’s always cut out of movies or replaced by priests that look like him. He apparently came to the school every year around Halloween to do a ghost tour around the campus for the students. A girl allegedly killed herself in my floor’s bathroom. He apparently always got a lot of activity around the campus. Everyone in the freshman class started wondering if the rumors about the Native American burial ground were true.
- One time in “writing” class the teacher gave us a number and then whatever song came up as that when we put our music on shuffle we had to play for the class. I ended up with “Touch Me” from Spring Awakening. Midway through the song, the teacher from another class came to complain that they could hear everything. My teacher tried to defend that all music has an important message. “Molly, dear, tell her the message in this song!” I looked around the room and at the other teacher. “It’s about sex,” I said quietly. She stormed out of the room while the class started laughing.
- There was this girl that just had the natural ability to make anything boring. I feel bad saying that, because she’s such a sweet girl, and she’s smart, and she’s gorgeous, and she’s talented, but just…every time she says anything, it’s boring. I’m still friends with her on facebook, the talent transcends to writing as well. You could be having a fun, lively conversation and she could say something completely relevant to the point and yet it would still just be boring. It’s a baffling talent, I still don’t understand how she does it.
- There was a boy who’d come into my room. He lusted over my s’mores poptarts. He kept trying to hit the high notes in Broadway songs. He didn’t understand my sense of humor at all, so we both were constantly worried we were offending each other. He cried about Selena Gomez a lot.
- The dining hall only offered horrendous food. I had pasta almost every night because it was the only thing remotely edible. If you wanted good food, you had to go to Late Night, which was between like 10:30 and 1 I think??? They set it up specifically for stoners and people leaving parties. I was frequently the only sober person there. Except for the moths.
- The chief at the pasta place found out I like theater and got like…weirdly passionate about it. He kept telling me about different theater groups in the area and wanted to know if I was in the school musical. He asked me every time I went up for food.
- There was a disproportionate amount of large black birds to trees. It wasn’t hard to figure out why we so rarely saw smaller animals
- When I told my advisor I was thinking about leaving (mostly for financial reasons but also the fake classes were preventing me from getting an education I wanted, you know?), this little old man looked around his office as if checking for people listening in, then put his hand on top of mine, leaned in close, and whispered “Oh, you sweet little girl. Run as fast as you can.”
There’s definitely more but listen. This school was weird and fake and vaguely surreal and off-kilter. I am fully afraid that one day, years from now, I’m going to be driving through the back roads and pass the place where the campus should be, only I won’t find anything there at all, and won’t be able to find any trace of it ever existing. I won’t be able to find any record of it. I won’t be able to find a record of any of the people. Every time I think about this place I just get a weird feeling, like I somehow managed to escape the Twilight Zone but left a part of me behind in the process. Be careful when applying to college, kids.
Okay, first off. I’m sorry. Everybody was in the heat of the moment and reacted terribly with the new update. I was a big part in that and I feel bad about it. But there are some new things going on with the update that they have fixed/explained to us.
#1 : Replied to my email about the issue.
(Image - Tumblr Trust and Safety replying with this:
We appreciate you writing in about this. We’ve heard from a
bunch of users that Safe Mode was filtering posts from the LGBTQ+
community even though they were completely innocuous and totally
safe-for-work. Please know that was never our intention, and we
appreciate you letting us know so quickly—and forcefully! We’re deeply
sorry. Tumblr will always be a place where everyone is welcome and
protected, so we want to explain what happened.
The major issue
was some Tumblrs had marked themselves as Adult/NSFW (now Explicit) as a
courtesy to their fellow users, and their perfectly safe posts were
getting marked sensitive unintentionally. That should never have
happened. We’re sorry.
First off, I’d like to thank them for answering so quickly and responsibly. They fully explained the issue to me in a very adult manor and I very much appreciate that.
Second, they actually gave me a explanation for the issue unlike most staff/helpers online. Which i again, very much appreciate.
#2: They are trying to fix the issue as quickly as they can without 100% removing the feature.
This, to me, is very understandable. the update on staff’s official blog is this:
We’ve heard from a bunch of you that Safe Mode
was filtering posts from the LGBTQ+ community even though they were
completely innocuous and totally safe-for-work. Please know that was
never our intention, and we appreciate you letting us know so
quickly—and forcefully! We’re deeply sorry. Tumblr will always be a place where everyone is welcome and protected, so we want to explain what happened.
major issue was some Tumblrs had marked themselves as Adult/NSFW (now
Explicit) as a courtesy to their fellow users, and their perfectly safe
posts were getting marked sensitive unintentionally. That should never
have happened. We’re sorry.
We’re making some changes that should improve things:
Changes to self-marked blogs
What was happening: Because we consider Explicit blogs to be predominantly sensitive content, we were automatically marking all their posts as sensitive. That was too broad.
What we fixed: Now each post is classified individually. As they should be.
Changes to reblog chains
What was happening: If an Explicit Tumblr reblogged a safe post, we were marking that reblog as sensitive. This was even happening to text posts. Which is silly.
What we fixed: We changed the logic so that if the OP is safe, all its reblogs will also be safe.
Changes to photosets
What’s (still) happening:
When you make a photo post, a computer algorithm classifies the image
as safe or sensitive. It’s a machine so it’s not perfect. And the
chances go up with photosets because there are multiple images. But out
of an abundance of caution we keep posts marked sensitive until the OP
requests a human review (by tapping the appeal button on their posts).
What we’re working on:
We plan to have photosets analyzed as a whole group, rather than as
individual images. That should reduce the number of mistakes the machine
Safe Mode is supposed to make sure people aren’t
surprised by things may not want to see—specifically, nudity. It might
take some time to get it perfect, but we’re committed to getting there
with your help. Our algorithms will keep getting smarter as you give
feedback on misclassified posts, and as you share your concerns and
And finally, please stop attacking staff with this issue. They are trying to help us and do not want to hurt us. You are simply putting them under much more pressure and stress than helping. They are not trying to hurt us. Stop attacking them over this.
I will email them and contact them with further issues about this, thank you.
college au ulysses: history/political science double major, does slam poetry, works as a pizza delivery guy, has a one-sided rivalry with another deliveryperson from a different company who doesn’t even know he exists
Everyone is super friendly, especially in the first few weeks
→ Introduce yourself to the people sitting near you for the first few weeks of lectures. Everyone is looking for a friend or at least someone to talk to!!
If you commute, make that time productive
→ My bus ride was an hour there and back each day. It sucks but I would try to be productive for at least half of the commute. I have a post about being productive on public transport here.
On that note, stay on campus as long as possible each day
→ As soon as I got back home I would procrastinate every little thing. Stay in an already productive environment for as long as possible.
Maybe don’t buy your textbooks used → I thought I was being smart by buying used textbooks (most schools will have a buy and sell facebook page for textbooks). I ended up having to pay for access codes in order to do my online homework – access codes that cost ~$70 separately and came included with new textbooks anyways. Email your prof or talk to someone who has recently taken the class to find out if you need an access code. If you do, your best bet is to buy a new version of the textbook (unless you can get a seriously cheap used textbook).
Print off your timetable and find all of your classes before the first day
→ This helped me so much! I found exactly where all my classes were before the first day of class. I wrote down little tricks to help me remember where everything was (i.e. my calc lecture is in the arts and science building which is also where the only subway on campus is).
Don’t knock living at home to save money
→ If you’re lucky enough to have a college or university close to home at least consider living at home. Getting your own place or living in dorms is expensive. (But if you have to find off campus housing on your own, don’t leave it too late or you might not find a place)
Figure out the best way to take notes for each class
→ You have to customize the way you study for each class, all depending on the prof and the content. I hand-wrote notes for some classes (chem, calc, and physics), but not others (psych and bio). If you’re writing by hand you can always just annotate your textbook notes or lecture slides (if they’re posted before class). If you fall behind while taking notes, just leave a gap and check out a friend’s notes after class.
Adjust your expectations
→ Don’t expect to get straight A’s, like you might have in high school. You can strive for straight A’s but be realistic as time goes on. For classes I struggled with, I expected to be near the class average. If I was a lot lower than the class average then I would know to invest more time.
Make time for physical activity
→ If we’re being honest I hardly exercised during uni. Go for at least a half hour walk each day and try to start a physical activity routine. Get a friend and join a sports team, go to a fitness class, or commit to some form of a daily workout with them! You’ll feel bad bailing on someone else, plus working out is more fun with other people.
Review content throughout the semester
→ Reviewing little bits of content will save you a massive content review right before finals! Look through old notes while you wait for your daily coffee or take 15 minutes to watch some khan academy videos on stuff you learned in the first month of classes.
Think seriously about how much you can handle
→ Don’t take on too many responsibilities at once and consider all of your options! I worked weekends and some week nights throughout the school year. Looking back I should have worked less because my stress levels were way too high. Also, quite a few people I talked to took 4 classes instead of 5, for their first semester of university. I don’t think I would have done it, in the end, but it’s always something to consider.
Have fun but be responsible at parties
→ Always go to parties with people you trust!! If you didn’t do much partying/drinking during high school (like me), remember to pace yourself when drinking! Eat before you go out and have some water between each drink, till you find your limit. Don’t let yourself be peer-pressured into anything but also don’t be afraid to have fun! And check out if your uni has a safe walk program (someone will come and walk you back to your dorm or your car if you feel unsafe or nervous for any reason)
When procrastination hits, aim to be productive in some way
→ The only reason my biology mark was so high was because I would study biology whenever I got sick of studying for physics and calculus. If you know you need to study but just can’t do it, start by being productive in some other way – study a subject you do like, do your laundry, organize your study area, etc. Get your brain to start thinking productively.
Labs are difficult so be prepared → I had so many labs first year. Some tips: eat and hydrate before labs, never assume you can finish your prelab last minute, be nice to your lab partner, always remember lab safety (don’t be the person trying to wear shorts in the lab, TAs will not hesitate to kick you out), don’t rush through an experiment but be efficient, and ask for help (even if you feel like you’re bothering your TA).
Please go to bed early. Sleep affects everything → I was so dumb and would never go to bed early even though I had to be up at 6 am almost every day to catch the bus. Lack of sleep will catch up to you eventually!! Also, all nighters are not necessary, unless you make them necessary. I prioritized and never had to stay awake too late. And never pull an all nighter the night before an exam (you’re better off getting sleep and resting your brain).
Bring a water bottle everywhere
→ Buy a decent water bottle and always carry it with you. Even though my uni is small there are still tons of spots around campus where I can refill my water bottle!! Stay hydrated my friends!
A practice problem a day keeps the F away
→ This saying probably works best for science classes, but I guess a reading a day will get you somewhere too. Do something for every class each day, even if it’s just a practice problem or a quick reading. Develop a routine!
You’ll have lots of midterms
→ I was under the impression that midterms happened just once a semester (I thought I would have one week where I had a midterm for each class). That was not my reality. I had 2 or 3 midterms for each of my classes scattered throughout the semester. Study really hard for your first set of midterms till you get used to the high expectations!
Don’t worry about what other people are doing or thinking
→ This is mostly in regards to social media. I was bummed when I looked back on my first year of university, because I felt like I hadn’t done anything fun compared to other people. You only see the image that other people want you to see. You don’t know how hard someone worked or how hard they didn’t work. Just focus on you and how you can affect positive results in your life.
Other people literally don’t care about your appearance → My friend’s little sister visited campus and asked us “Why is everyone wearing sweatpants?” People literally don’t care. Dress nice and put lots of makeup on one day, because you feel like it, and wear sweats the next day.
Start essays and reports as soon as possible
→ You never know what might come up so be prepared for the worst! Outline your essay or graph your data as soon as you can.
Eat healthy and do meal prep
→ You can eat healthy during university! Set aside a couple of nights each week to do meal prep. Cook food in bulk to save money and don’t eat out too much. Try to have at least 1 serving of fruits or veggies with each meal or snack you eat!
Find a good study spot on campus
→ Explore your campus and figure out your favourite places to study. I had a couple of spots where I would always meet my friends to study and quiet spots where no one would bother me. Studying outside or in an area with natural light is always good.
Don’t be afraid to talk to your profs and TAs
→ This is the number one thing I’m going to try to do more of in my second year. TAs are chill to talk to and they can tell you tons of useful information on what upper year classes are like, which professors are good, why they chose to go to grad school, etc. If you’re struggling in lectures or labs, talk to your prof or TA! Make an appointment and be sure you can tell them exactly which concepts you’re struggling with or at least where you got lost. One of my profs told us he just waits hopefully during office hours for someone to come in. (Also profs love it if you ask them about their research or any topics they seem passionate about during lectures.)
Explore all the resources your university has to offer
→ My university has a program that is basically people bringing their dogs around for students to pet, in order to relieve stress. It actually works and gave me something to look forward to! Just be aware of your options so that if something in your life changes you know where you can go to ask for help.
Get a planner and utilize it
→ There’s no excuse not to have a planner of some sort. Use your phone, get a bullet journal, or buy a cheap planner. Have somewhere where you can record important deadlines and make to do lists. I also recommend back planning all of your studying at the beginning of the semester. Write down your midterms and finals dates and write down how much you’re going to study each day leading up to the exam. This way you’ll be able to look ahead at each month and figure out what needs to be done (i.e. getting an essay done early because the due date falls during a busy week of midterms)
This post ended up being a lot longer than I expected whoops. Take the things I said into consideration but remember that everyone’s experience will be different. Good luck to everyone heading to university!
I got quite some asks a while ago about “What does my fave say about me???” and I wanna answer all of them and also no new chapter which is crushing:
Class 1-A: Alphabetized
Aoyama Yuuga: you have horrible self-esteem issues and cover it up by attracting attention to yourself because you want the attention but have absolutely no idea what to do with it once you have it
Ashido Mina: a loud passionate person with a fondness for dress-up (everyday wear or costumes, it doesn’t matter) and people are shocked to find out your level of nerdiness because like… “you don’t look like a nerd…”
Bakugou Katsuki: a spitfire on the inside and sometimes on the outside. You spicy af and people tell you to tone it down. Was a genius in middle school but then found out about everyone else catching up. Has a SUPER fear of failure.
Hagakure Tooru: A cute little flower who blends into the background but never fear, all that gossip is here! People forget you a lot, but you’re used to it. Gotta keep that positive attitude!!!!
Iida Tenya: People tell you you’re weird a lot and they also tell you you’re annoying but you’re just trying to help. Smart af when it comes to what you know, but pretty clueless otherwise.
Jirou Kyouka: You have that one piece of clothing you love dearly and have owned for years and people are shocked to see you whenever you’re not wearing it. Actual music hoe. *takes out one earbud* whut
Kaminari Denki: Admit it you’re an irl troll face but deep down you’re actually the rarest of pepes. Just wants to be loved by friends but you also want a date to prom so jokingly-for-real ask people out on dates. It hasn’t really worked.
Kirishima Eijirou: You love The Gays™ or are irl gay yourself. You’re an actual cinnamon roll but you’re hella burnt on the inside so you’ve got a spine of steel. You love your friends and aren’t afraid to say it. HUGS FOR EVERYONE
Kouda Kouji: You little animal lover you~ <3 ! Shy and sweet, people tell you that you don’t talk much but you’re just anxious. Will talk about your passions until you pass out but if it’s in front of strangers then NO THANKS
Midoriya Izuku: Actual cinnamon roll just trying your best, you’re smart with what you’re passionate about but that also makes you a giant nerd. You have that one weird little quirk that nobody understands so you hide it a lot.
Mineta Minoru: You’re goofy and the squad clown but also naive af. Might not be noticeable on the outside but UR A SINNER HARRY. You read way too much fanfiction because actual porn feels weird/ is too much
Ojiro Mashirao: You like to stick to the background but you also want people to notice when you’ve achieved something so you’re stuck in this cycle of “I want this to look good but also original but not too weird but also cool but also…”
Satou Rikkidou: Your resting bitch face almost has yourself fooled but there’s nothing that can comfort you like food and your best bro can. Is really good at cooking. Part of the “Support Everyone But Forgets Yourself” Squad.
Sero Hanta: You come off as harmless but deep down you’re a disgusting memer waiting for the perfect moment to pun and meme. Your health is important, look at this article you printed off just for your friends’ cringe
Shouji Mezou: You’re quiet at first but hella observant so you can tell the moment to open up and let people see how harmless you are on the inside. Gentle soul who only want the best for others. Will kill/die to protect others.
Todoroki Shouto: You’ve been deeply hurt by someone you looked up to and you know you’re still messed up. You’re trying to grow away from the pain but it’s hard. A little wrapped up in your head, you want to love others again.
Tokoyami Fumikage: You know every word to “Welcome to the Black Parade”. You like really cool, dark and edgy things so your inner emo is Strong™. People tell you that you need to cool your chill and warm up. flip them the bird.
Tsuyu Asui: IRL perfect friend, you are the mom friend/ big sis friend of the group who makes sure everyone stays together and doesn’t do stupid shit. At least, doesn’t do stupid shit without you. Pokèmon was a lifestyle, once.
Uraraka Ochako: Looks innocent on the outside but will punch a guy if they step over that very clear line. Friends and family are to be protected at all costs. You’re so cheap, people laugh but in reality you’re scared to spend money.
Yaoyorozu Momo:Smart af and pretty too, you’re so used to things coming easily to you that you panic as soon as something seems hard. In group projects you’re the one that does 95% of the work. You’re (kinda) ok with this.
Alright, I covered Class 1-A first, but if your fave isn’t on this list, or you wanna look up your other faves, I left it all under the cut!
All Might/ Toshinori Yagi: Actual cinnamon roll trying their best to be a good guardian and lead those who are lost. Is the actual biggest dork around. Tries to be cool but simply… isn’t. We love you anyways. Pls take care of yourself too.
Eraserhead/ Aizawa Shouta: you’re extra salty in need of a nap and still care about everyone around you but still like to fuck with them to show you care. Is a cat person and feels like you can only get along with other cat people.